Chapter 2

All the way home Maura kept thinking about what Frost had said and she wondered about it. She had never had a best friend growing up, as a matter of fact she didn't have many friends at all. So she wasn't sure what she was supposed to feel for Jane. When she was growing up her parents enrolled her in a school for gifted children and most of the other kids were older than her and none of them wanted to be friends with a kid. When she was home she spent most of her time alone, reading books and doing research.

Having grown up in San Mateo California is was a natural choice to go to Stanford University and once she started college, at the age of 14, she was used to being alone and actually preferred it that way. She was too young to party with the older kids so she was able to concentrate on her studies. When it came time to continue on to Medical School she deiced it was time for a change she applied to Harvard Medical School and was accepted. Once again she was younger than most of the other students but at least now she was 18 and old enough to take care of herself. So although most of the students were still older than her she was able to relate to them better than she had in college. She made a few friends, whom she still talks to often, and fell in love with Boston. During her rounds as a resident at Massachusetts General Hospital she was assisting in a heart bypass surgery and the patient died on the table. The doctor was torn up about it and blamed himself. It was later determined in autopsy that the patient had died of a brain aneurism and then doctor was able to come to terms with it. That was what made Maura want to become a Medical Examiner. She was the youngest Medical Examiner in Massachusetts history and was still younger than most of her peers.

It wasn't until Jane became a Homicide Detective and bulled her way into Maura's life that Maura let someone in for the very first time. Her and Jane were as different as night and day. Jane was brash and an in your face kind of woman and Maura was quiet and introspective. Jane drank beer from a bottle and Maura preferred $50 bottle of wines. Jane wore off of the rack clothes that did nothing to show off her feminine side and Maura wore outfits that cost more than Jane made in a month. Still she wormed her way into Maura's life without her even knowing it. But was it more than that? How did she really feel about the other women. How far off were the comments? She knew she was closer to Jane than to anyone she had known before but how deep do those feelings go?

In college she had been attracted to a few women but she thought it was a case of hero worship and continued to date guys. She never found the one who made her heart beat faster when they entered a room. You know the feeling, I know you do. You're standing in a room and you look up when she enters and your heart drops to your stomach. Oh shit! Maura had to pull over to the side of the road. "That's how I feel when Jane enters a room. When she smiles at me I feel warm all over." Maura lowered her head into her hands and groaned. How could I have let this happen. Better yet, what am I going to do about it? Nothing! She was sure Jane was straight as an arrow and her feelings for Maura were just that of a friend. "Deal with it Maura, she doesn't feel that way so you are just going to have to forget about it." Maura pulled back onto the road and drove home. She knew she had to get her feelings under control before Jane got here. She decided a nice hot shower was in order so she poured herself a glass of wine and headed into the bathroom.

Little did Maura know that across town Jane was having much the same internal conversation with herself. Well not all of it was internal. "How the hell could I have fallen in love with your best friend Jane? Stupid move Rizzoli. Why her, why couldn't it have been some nameless faceless bimbo somewhere else." She was quite sure Maura was straight, look at the way she ogles the guys at the gym. "So Jane what the hell are you going to do now? You've got yourself in over your head this time." She decided she was just going to have to pretend nothing had changed. She had been able to ignore her feelings for women this far so why not go on pretending. She had fun with the guys she dated and the sex was ok, nothing to scream about, but ok. Why change things now? "Frost I'm going to kill you for opening up this can of worms!" Jane slammed her hand against the steering wheel. Jane pulled into her parking lot and went up to her apartment. She sat down on the couch and dropped her head to the back of the couch and sighed deeply. She picked up her phone and called Maura. "Hey Maura, maybe I should just pick you up in the morning."

Maura wasn't sure how she felt about this. On one hand she was relieved but on the other she was looking forward to spending the night with Jane. "Are you ok Jane?" Maura asked gently.

Jane was too quick to respond. "Yeah I'm fine, why wouldn't I be? I'm fine Maura."

"You sound different. Do you need me to come over there?" Maura wasn't sure why she made the offer but once again she wanted to see Jane.

"No! That's ok but thanks. I think I'll just call it a night and we can go out for breakfast to hash this out."

Now it was Maura's turn to get defensive. "Hash what out?" She was sure Jane had guessed how she felt. "We don't have anything to hash out."

"What do you mean? You're the one that said we needed to talk about how to approach the women and what questions to ask them." Jane was wondering how Maura could have forgotten something she herself had suggested.

"Oh that, yeah we do need to talk about it." She sighed loudly, maybe too loudly.

"What did you think I was talking about? Are you sure you're ok? Maybe I should come over there to check on you."

"No! I'm fine Jane I'll see you in the morning. What time do you want to pick me up? I'll take some time tonight and come up with a list of questions."

"I should be there about 8:00 is that ok?"

"That would be fine. I'll see you then." She didn't even wait for Jane to say anything before she hung up the phone. "I think that I need a long hot bath." She went out to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of wine and one glass then went upstairs and started the bath water. While that was running she went to her room and shed her clothes not even caring where they landed. By the time she got back to her bathroom the bath was ready. She turned the music on and her favorite opera spewed forth from the speakers, she turned it up louder than usual because she needed to drown out certain thoughts. She added lavender scents to the water then lowered herself into the tub with a sigh. She laid her head back on the edge of the bathtub and tried to clear her mind and took a sip of her wine.

Meanwhile, Jane felt that Maura was keeping something from her so she got in her car and headed over to Maura's house.