Chapter 5

Maura turned to Jane smiling and hoped that she didn't give too much away about what the last 2 hours had done to her. Her nerves were frayed because all she'd wanted to do was pull Jane to her and make all this pretending real. "Let's run by your place so you can pick up some clothes, then we can run by the grocery store so you can pick up some meat or whatever it is you need."

"Don't forget the laundry detergent." Jane turned her head so Maura couldn't see the smile on her face.

"Would you forget about the laundry detergent already? Let's just get out of here and away from the woman who was undressing you with her eyes."

"Is this your way of saying you're attracted to me?"

"If I was I sure wouldn't treat you like that and especially not in front of someone who was supposed to be your girlfriend. Our pretending either did not fool her or she didn't care."

"How would you treat me if you were interested in me Maura?" Jane asked in a low seductive voice.

Maura couldn't look at her when she spoke so she looked straight ahead. "For starters I would cherish you as you have never been cherished before. I would never treat you like an object I possessed but as an equal partner. I would send you little gifts to tell you that you are loved. I would rub your tired feet at night and I would run a hot bath and wash you with the softest cloth you have ever felt against your skin. I would call you just to let you know I was thinking about you and look forward to those same calls from you. We would sit together at night and talk about our day and I would be there for you if you had a bad day to hold you if you needed to cry or get you a beer if you needed to rant. I would prefer the holding but hey it's you so you would probably rant and rave. Maybe a backrub with hot oils would soothe you and those tight muscles of yours. I would wake you in the morning with a soft kiss before tenderly making love to you. Then I would get up and we could shower together, head to the kitchen and make breakfast. Then go to work and do it all over again that night. That's if I was interested in you." Maura glanced over at Jane and had to smile when she saw her white knuckle grip on the steering wheel. She reached over and placed her hand on Jane's and watched her jump and she had to stop herself from laughing. "Are you ok Jane?" She asked innocently.

Jane had to clear her throat before she could speak. "Sure Maura I'm fine, just fine, why wouldn't I be fine?"

"You're gripping that steering wheel a bit tight and you seem tense. Are you sure you're ok? I worry about you you know. You just get so stressed out ion your job, maybe I'll give you a good back rub when we get home."

"Sure Maura that would be nice. Whatever you say will be fine." Jane was having a serious problem concentrating on her driving. Just the thought of Maura giving her a backrub was enough to fuel her dreams for weeks she could only imagine what her actually giving her a backrub will do to her. "I think a backrub would help immensely."

"Sure Jane I have some oil that I think you would like a lot."

"Oh I'm sure you do." Jane said under her breath.

"What did you say Jane?" Maura thought she'd heard but she wasn't sure.

"Nothing Maura. I was talking to myself." Jane was afraid to even look at Maura for fear that she would see her true feelings written all over her face. How the hell am I going to work this case with her, I thought pretending to be together would be fun but it sure was harder than I thought it would be when Maura plays along so nicely. Jane pulled up in front of the police station and ran around to Maura's side to open the door for her. "Don't ever get out without letting me check the area to make sure it's safe ok? Maybe I should use the parking garage until this is all over. Yeah the garage is secure, he wouldn't be able to get up there. Who am I kidding he can get to anywhere he wants to get to. Just let me check everything before you do anything away from your office ok?"

"Jane you're rambling, are you sure you're ok?" Maura started walking towards the building.

"Hell no I'm not ok. We may have just told a crazy man that you are involved in this case and I don't like that one bit. I don't want you to be in danger because of my job Maura. It's a risk I didn't ever want to involve you in but now I have. This is a part of my life I wanted to keep separate from you." Jane held open the door for Maura to walk ahead of her.

Maura was touched by the sincerity in Jane's voice. "Jane there is no way you could keep your job separate from me. If I can help in any way then it's a risk I am willing to take. What this man is doing to these women is beyond anything anyone should have to endure and if I can stop him then I will."

"But you're not trained for this kind of stuff." Jane punched the elevator button and they walked in the elevator together. When did this elevator get so small or was Maura standing closer to her than usual?

"Well then you can train me to defend myself and little hand to hand training might be fun." Just the thought of Jane that close to her would be worth getting thrown to the mat. There is the part where she would have to pin me to the mat. Ok Maura get a hold of yourself. "But if you are going to be with me all the time I won't need it."

"What about if you are called to a scene of a case I'm not involved in?" Maura reached across Jane and pushed the button to go down to the morgue. She made sure to rub her hand across Jane's arm` and she was pulling her arm back.

"Jane there are usually cops everywhere when I come on a scene. How much safer can I be than that?"

"Maura this guy has to be getting to the ladies some way. Who knows maybe he uses disguises and if he does I wouldn't put it past him to use a uniform. Just promise me you'll be careful ok? I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to you." She was quick to add. "Because if anything did happen it would be my fault for bringing you this far into an investigation."

The elevator door opened and Maura walked out ahead of Jane so she missed the quick look of hurt that crossed Maura's face. "Yeah because everything is your fault, no one does anything unless it's ok with Jane Rizzoli." She was getting angry. She rounded on Jane so fast that Jane had to put her hands on Maura's shoulder to stop herself from running into her. "Even if you were not involved in this case I would help whoever was. I'm not doing this because you're the lead investigator, I'm doing it because I want to stop this monster. So you are not allowed to be responsible for me because it is my choice."

Jane was taken aback by Maura's anger. "What are you mad about Maura? What did I do?" She asked in a quiet voice that made Maura feel bad about getting angry.

Maura took Jane by the hand and led her out of the hallway. "Come into my office, I hate discussing things like this in the hallway." She also needed a little more time to regain her bearings. When Jane had her hands on her shoulders and she looked down with those big brown puppy dog eyes Maura had almost went up on her tip toes and kissed her. She was so close to saying to hell with it and kissing her anyway. She closed the door to her office when they entered and she turned to Jane. "Jane I love that you are worried about me, that's what friends do. Now you have some sort of an idea how I feel every day when you go out there and do your job. I know you are trained but it doesn't stop me from worrying. I care what happens to you Jane, more than you will ever know."

Jane walked over and closed the blinds on the window that opened to the hallway. She walked over and locked the door then closed the blinds that led to the morgue. "What are you doing Jane?" Maura asked in a small voice. She wasn't sure what Jane was up to.

"I just wanted to talk without being interrupted. You said I would never know how much you care about me, why is that Maura?" Jane walked away from her and kept her back to Maura as she started speaking. "How much do you care Maura? Do you care as much as I do? Am I the first thing you think about in the morning and the last thing you think about at night? Because you are for me and I don't give a damn if you don't feel the same. I'm just so tired of pretending, today I wasn't pretending when I was touching you in front of Susan, I wanted to touch you even more but I didn't want to scare you away. I want you Maura but it's so much more than sexual. When you were describing how you would treat me I was wishing to god I could make that happen. I want to have someone to come home to at night that will let me cry on their shoulder, you have no idea how many times I go home at night and cry into my pillow. I want that someone to be you." She finally turned around and was surprised to see tears in Maura's eyes. "Ah shit now look what I did, I made you cry. Why don't I just leave and pretend I didn't say anything. Forget this conversation even happened ok?" She started heading for the door but stopped when she felt Maura's hand on her arm. She was afraid to look at Maura.

"Jane Rizzoli you have no idea how long I've waited to hear those words. What I said in the car was all true, I want all of it and I want it with you too." Jane finally turned to face her and was reassured when Maura finally smiled up at her. "I held back today because I was afraid I would get carried away and do or say something that would give myself away. I've wanted to do this for years." She finally put her hands on either side of Jane's face and pulled her face towards her. "Kiss me Jane." The smile that lit Jane's face made Maura's heart flutter. Jane lowered her head the rest of the way and when their lips finally met they both moaned at the first contact. Maura parted her lips in invitation and Jane didn't hesitate to enter the heaven that waited for her when their tongues met. They pulled apart and Jane rested her head against Maura's forehead. "What other cases do you have to work on today Jane?" Maura's voice was barely above a whisper.

"After a kiss like that you want to discuss my caseload?" Jane asked incredulously.

Maura laughed a very sexy laugh that Jane was sure she had never heard before but liked a lot. "Jane I don't care about your caseload, I just give want to know if you can leave now without anyone caring. I want to take you home and continue this conversation in a more comfortable atmosphere."

"You do? Can we put off the grocery shopping until later?"

"Much later." Maura pulled her down for a toe curling kiss that had both of them breathing heavy. Jane wrenched herself away and had to walk away from her. "Where are you going."

"Over here." Jane stood with her back against the wall as far away from Maura as she could get.

"Why are you way over there?" Maura slowly walked towards her and Jane could swear there was an extra sway in her hips for her benefit. She stopped right in front of Jane almost breast to breast.

"Because if I kiss you again I'm not sure I can promise not to take you right here and now on your desktop. I've wanted you for so long and I've had to watch the guys ogle you and not say anything. Especially since I was ogling you too." Maura reached up and put her arms around Jane's neck. "Don't touch me Maura, I can't help myself, I cannot be held accountable for my actions."

"Maybe I want you to take me on my desktop. Maybe I want you to lose it" Maura pushed Jane up against the wall and kissed her with all of the pent up passion she had been feeling all day. "I want you so bad. Take me home Jane." Jane didn't say a word, she took Maura's hand and hurried to the door. She unlocked it and headed towards the back door. "Where are you going?"

"Your car is out here, this way I don't have to answer any questions from the guys if we run into them on the way to the front door. I want you to myself and I want you now!" Maura giggled and had to almost run to keep up with Jane's long strides