BioWare owns all the goodies.
Note: Sorry this is a long one, just didn't feel right hacking it up.
She became very still, her face a mask of neutrality. "How did, when did you - ?" She paused then turned to look at him. Seeing the look on his face she burst out laughing.
"What?" The laughter took him by surprise, so soon after the anger. It was like a beam of sunlight breaking through storm clouds.
The petulant look on his face made her laugh harder, the armor falling to the floor forgotten. "You're not, you're not jealous, are you? You can't be!" She gasped, catching her breath, holding her healed side as it twinged.
He crossed his arms over his chest in a huff, "I don't see what's so funny. Who is he?"
"Well, it's find it funny or push you out of the window." He gave her an incredulous look, and then slowly moved away from the window seat. She closed her eyes and shook her head, shoulders slumping, the humor draining from her body as quickly as it appeared. He was learning that she was as still predictable as the wind. "Oh, Alistair. I should have known this day would come, I just didn't expect it so soon. I, I mean - he's…my son: Alesander."
He sat there in stunned silence. He definitely wasn't expecting that. Opening and closing his mouth several times, he finally stammered out, "Y-Your…son? But, but how? Then who is the… I mean. Oh. Ales..ander." He sounded out the name like he was chewing on week-old porridge. "Maker's breath, you had a child with that, that maleficar you conscripted?" He felt disgusted, "You…you killed Templars over him!"
She had forgotten about that. Biting her lip, she frowned at him, "They only set up an ambush for us and tried to kill us, even though we were Grey Wardens! I would think you would be less judgmental after everything. That 'maleficar' also happens to be a good man at heart. Would you stop that and sit down!" He didn't realize he had been pacing and threw himself into the chair next to her, leaning away and bouncing his leg.
She shook her head at his behavior, trying to remember that this was a shock to him. "While Alesander wasn't why I left, he is certainly why I stayed away." She stared into the cold hearth while she put the words together. "The morning we reached left Redcliffe, I learned that I was pregnant. There wasn't exactly any time to share this information, bigger things on our plate and all that, plus you and I weren't exactly talking to each other."
She had done everything Wynne had accused her of, trying to be selfish instead of putting the greater good first, and they hadn't even faced the Archdemon yet. In the end, Alistair realized that as much as he didn't want to be king, he wanted Anora as queen even less. Once his mind was made up, she had to admit that he embraced it without hesitation. She just didn't anticipate that it would result in being cast aside like a dirty rag.
His leg stilled and he sat up, giving her a searching look, "Wait a minute, Redcliffe? Does that mean…?" He was fairly certain she hadn't met Anders before he sent her to Amaranthine. A seed of hope stirred within.
She continued as if she didn't hear, "After your coronation, Leliana and I left for Soldier's Peak. She's the only person who knows the truth, not even Alesander knows. It was her suggestion to give a non-Fereldan sounding name. When she received your request for the darkspawn research, she took him with her to find a family and eventually I came here."
"I…have a…son? With...you?" He felt like he had been punched in the stomach.
"Well, unless you're accusing me of being unfaithful back then, but yes, a half-blooded, bastard son who is also a mage." Alistair could detect no bitterness when she said those words. "You can see why I haven't exactly announced it to the world, and I would like it to stay that way." She gave him an anxious look.
He shook his head, "I…had no idea. I even had Zevran look for you when you disappeared and he said nothing."
Another arched eyebrow greeted him, "You had Zev spy on me? He found me, after Leliana had left, tried to cheer me up. Never mentioned you, though. One day he was gone again and I had the request to come to Amaranthine waiting for me."
His eyes narrowed, "Well, you disappeared! I was worried and no one could find you. I can't believe he didn't tell me he found you. So he doesn't know about…our son?" He said the words with growing wonder.
"Of course he doesn't, although if he has suspicions, I couldn't tell you, and I haven't seen him since." She watched Alistair and could tell he had no recent contact either. "Leliana says Alesander is a miracle from the Maker. I can't explain it although with both of us tainted, the Archdemon's death, and who knows what Morrigan could have done, it's no real surprise something happened."
At the mention of Morrigan's name, Alistair flinched. Calitae looked at him, but he wouldn't meet her eye. "Wait. You know something. Are you why Morrigan left without a trace after we slay the Archdemon? She says that we're like sisters and then she just leaves without a word. Alistair, what did you say to her?" She had grabbed his wrist and her fingers were painfully digging into his arm.
He pulled his arm back and went to put some distance between them, rubbing the rising bruises. "What all do you remember from our last night in Redcliffe?"
She looked at him suspiciously, "Redcliffe? We just found out that one of us had to die. I didn't want to talk to anyone, especially you, and Wynne was trying to give me an "I told you so" lecture, so I went climbing. I…think I heard someone knocking on my door, but I was already out the window."
"No wonder we couldn't find you," He muttered as he ran his hand through his hair. "That was probably me knocking on the door. You didn't speak to Morrigan?"
Calitae seemed reluctant, "Yes; she was in my room after we left Riordan. She…told me why Flemeth sent her with us. I was in no position to give what Morrigan was asking of me, and after Denerim, no position to ask it of you either. I told her to speak to you."
He tipped his head to one side, "You knew. And you didn't think I may have wanted to talk to you about it? Maker! You can be so…selfish!" He threw his hands in the air in exasperation. "I was just as sick about what Riordan had told us as you were. I know I hurt you, but the Blight and the future of Fereldan was just a little more important than our feelings!" She grew paler as his voice became louder, eyes growing wide. She crossed her arms and hugged herself. He realized at that moment that even during all those times when she was looking after him, when she seemed so strong even if it was a brave face to keep everyone moving forward, all he ever wanted to do was make her feel safe.
He lowered his voice, still full of emotion and intensity, "I wanted to die after what I did to you. Let Anora have the throne, all of them be damned." He shook his head and made an angry pushing motion to the side. "And if you had died? Why would I want to live with myself knowing I could have done something to save you?" He tapped his chest over his heart for emphasis.
Tears slowly filled her eyes, threatening to spill, but she didn't look away, "So you…?" There was no jealousy or anger in her voice, just quiet sadness. He was worried he would have yet another thing to beg forgiveness for, but it would all be worth it if she would just smile at him again like she used to.
He nodded, "Even though the thought of being with her was revolting. Morrigan was the most upset I've ever seen her, you meant more to her than I think you realize. Both of us wanted to save you. I know you. I know that there would be nothing stopping you from taking that final blow yourself, even if you did hate me then." He stepped around the desk and put his arms around her. Calitae resisted at first and then he felt her hands lightly brushing across his back as she embraced him back. "Morrigan's request was in my chance to protect you. And I certainly didn't argue when she said she was leaving and never coming back. I…I thought you knew."
They stood in each others' arms for a moment; he reluctantly released her the moment he felt her shift. Half-smiling, he carefully brushed away a tear from her cheek, "So there you have it; the bastard king went and made two of his own bastards."
Calitae gave him a crooked smile, her eyes still sad, "You told me it would be difficult for Gray Wardens to have children and here you have five running around." She gave him a sideways look, "Or is there more I don't know about?"
Alistair laughed and held up his hands in surrender, "No, I promise, up until today, I only knew of three for certain. Quite a happy day, if bumpy, I might add." That coaxed a slightly fuller smile from the mother of his eldest child. The mere thought made his heart skip a beat. "Tell me about him."
She took his hand and led him to the window seat. She sat facing out, her legs dangling down the wall, leaning against his legs as he sat sideways, with his feet braced on the frame. He watched her watching the people below; the delicate point of her ears, the sweep of her neck, how the sun turned her rich brown hair into a deep red. He felt self-conscious about how he had aged, and fingered the hair at his temple. His movement caught her eye and she looked at him, realizing what he was doing, she caught his hand, "I think it makes you look even more handsome than before." He flushed faintly as she delicately kissed his palm and placed his arm across her lap.
Calitae didn't seem ready to talk yet, so with his free hand he lightly traced a scar she didn't have when they were last face to face. It started right before her ear and followed along her jaw. "What's this from?"
She made a face, "House Dace in Orzammar lost some people looking for the secrets to the golems, even after I expressly warned them against it. Jerrik didn't tell me the full story until I got there. The abomination we found there tried to remove my head. It missed."
"Aha. So that's what you weren't telling me when you asked me to request King Bhalen keep the dwarves from pursuing Caridin's research."
She shrugged and tipped her head so he could see the scar better, it was wider than he first realized, "No healer, so I was a little distracted with the pain. But I knew they would listen to you; Warden-Commander or not, they still saw me as a lowborn and you were a mighty noble."
Calitae took a deep breath, "Our...son." She smiled at him, wistfully, "I never thought I'd say that out loud, or that you'd ever know. I'm glad that you do, though; it hasn't been an easy secret to keep." Thinking on it, he realized it must have been a burden, if only having to keep her emotions in check with the role she was to fill. He couldn't imagine not being able to tell his children how much he loved them or how proud they made him feel. If she had her way, he would soon be learning.
"You must realize he has no idea who he really is and it needs to stay that way, surely you can see that. Most people think I adopted him. To him and to anyone who asks, I'm his aunt, married to his father's brother. His parents, my husband all died during a darkspawn attack, he was fostered by a neighboring family, who know no differently. I had little contact with him until his powers became evident as a small child and I took him to the Circle. He was young enough that he has little memory of life before the Tower."
His arm tightened involuntarily over her stomach, "You got married?" He schooled his voice and face to remain neutral.
She patted his arm, "No, I was close once or twice but never actually went through with the whole mess. It's merely the best story we could come up with that would leave little to question, although after so many were lost or displaced after the Blight, most don't even bother." She smiled, remembering, "When he was little, he admitted he wished Anders was his father and to his credit, while Anders never lied he was able to help out with magely and manly things…as manly as Anders could mange, that is. Better him than Oghren at least. Fortunately Alesander never picked up on Anders' dislike of authority figures." She chuckled.
Absentmindedly, Alistair scrubbed ran his hand over his hair, "I can hardly believe it, you know? I have a son. With you. What about the blood, his blood, the taint?"
She nodded, "He's been watched carefully and Avernus would test him when we both went to Soldier's Peak. No unusual nightmares and I can't sense him any more than Chey, thankfully – that would be tough to explain to Ventris. He's a happy, healthy boy." Calitae looked down as she picked at his sleeve, "I'm…I'm sorry I never told you. I didn't want there to be any problems with your succession after all we had been through to get you there."
Alistair placed a finger under her chin and gently turned her head to face him, "I may not understand all of why you did what you did but know that I trust you. How can I not?" She gave a small smile and cupped his hand over her cheek, closing her eyes. "Can I meet him?"
She shook her head vehemently, "Never as his father if I have my way. You have three legitimate children and a capable queen - there is nothing good down that path." She could sense his disappointment, so playfully tugged his beard, "I'm not so sure as king-turned-courier either or whatever you're doing dressed like this."
They stayed touching for a moment before she pulled back, still holding his hand. He smiled. "About that. This was not at all how I expected this to go. I'm just saying."
"Oh? What, you were expecting to find me buried behind a mountain of ledger books and were going to sweep me away for a short while before running back to your castle?"
"Well, now that you mention it, yes! Cursing up a storm as you battled quill and papercut alike. But no running away for me." She rolled her eyes at him. "No really, though. This is actually Eona's idea."
Note: I forget where I read it, but someone was sharing the opinion in regards to potential DA3 plots that Morrigan would do probably anything to get what she wanted, in this case the chance at an Old God's soul. Saving the Warden who's become so dear to her would merely be a benefit.
Whomever that was, thank you!