Haja

Chapter 4

The pain in his chest was searing, and he couldn't get his head above the water to take the needed breath. His paws pulled desperately at the water, spread claws not any kind of help in getting to the top.

His nose broke above the surface and he took the breath, partly of the air, partly of the slimy pond water. Through the water in his ears he could hear Dudley laugh and laugh, taunting him. Giant hands tore him free of the water and he felt a momentary relief.

Then he was soaring through the air, limbs flailing, searching for purchase where there was none.

Impact on the water knocked what breath he had managed to draw right out of him again so that he drew in a bit of water before he stopped himself from inhaling.

He couldn't do it anymore. He couldn't keep on struggling. How much easier it would be to just stop fighting the inevitable and let go…

He was dimly aware that he was in the middle of a nightmare and that the real danger no longer threatened. The thrashing of his paws as if trying to swim and the feeling that he was suffocating had awakened him in a state of panic.

The warm fur that surrounded him was rumbling in a deep, gentle cadence against his back. The lap of a rough tongue soothed him, relaxing him back into sleep before he was fully awake…

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Severus watched the quivering cat, seeing in the twitching muscles and paws the nightmare that had descended. The plaintive and terrified mews from the small throat touched a part of him that he had not known existed. His intention had been to simply finish cleaning the filthy brat. He found his animagus form to be much more suited than his human hands. Potter was asleep and would never know that it was him.

Then the nightmares began, and he supposed that he should have expected it. Potter had been plagued with nightmares as the Boy Who Lived. Why should the Cat Who Lived be exempt?

He knew that the internal injuries were not healed completely and that the broken bones were still fragile. The movement of the small limbs in the nightmare state would be painful. He curled himself around the small cat, intent on offering a sense of shelter and comfort. The tongue gave gentle swipes to the fevered head, cleaning the black fur and lulling Harry away from the night terror and into the dreamless sleep that the potion had been intended to give.

********

When Harry woke up again he was swaddled in the blanket on the rug in front of the fireplace. The coals had burned down to embers and he stared into them with half open eyes. Merlin! Snape's potions certainly had different effects when one was under the animagus transformation. Maybe it had to do with the amount he had been given for his size. He recalled the nightmare, reliving the torture at the pond, thinking he was going to drown because he no longer had the strength to swim. Then he thought he had felt a protective force surround him. He knew that it hadn't been part of the real events. It was different; something that was happening in the now.

A clearing throat had him lifting his head quickly. Hmm… not so painful anymore. Snape was walking towards him, towering in all his billowy robes and darkness, and the fur began to rise on Harry's back.

"I have your breakfast," the man intoned quietly, kneeling beside the rug.

That was better, now that he was down on Harry's level; not so intimidating. Harry noticed the plate that was set down beside him and his nose twitched at the delicious smell. He could detect some more potion, but that was okay. If Snape had wanted to kill him he would have let Dudley finish the job or chunked him back in the pond himself.

He slowly stood up, testing the pain level in his body as he stretched. With wobbly legs he stepped to the plate and began to pick at the food. He scooted his body around the plate when Snape sat down on the floor beside him, to keep from having his back to the man. He watched him warily from the corner of his eye.

"You realize, Potter, that you must try again to reverse transform."

Harry ignored him, closing his eyes as he ate. So he was startled when a hand stroked down his back. He flinched away before deciding that it felt good to be stroked like that. Settling back on his haunches, he continued to eat while Snape petted him. Fingers scratched between his ears and Harry felt a rumble begin in his throat and chest.

He stopped eating for a few moments to examine the strange feeling. He looked up at Snape and the man actually gave him a sort of smirking smile.

"However much you may be enjoying this form, if you stay too much longer it could be permanent. You must accomplish the reverse spell. Once you do, you will be able to transform whenever you wish."

'''If I am a cat, I won't have to fight Voldemort.'''

"True, but will you really be happy knowing you left everyone to whatever fate that madman dictates?"

'''I just want to be free of the pressure, know what it's like to be a kid, before I have to kill somebody.'''

Fingers at the side of his neck rubbed a fraction harder, making Harry lean into the touch. Snape didn't say anything to that, though. The depth of Harry's fatigue was obvious as the boy didn't even seem to realize that he was speaking in '''cat''' and Snape was answering.

When he had finished his food, Snape stood up and looked down at the cat expectantly. "Focus your mind on the spell. Focus on shifting to your human body."

Harry closed his eyes and concentrated. For several minutes, nothing happened. Then the change happened so rapidly that Harry found himself falling headlong onto the floor, smacking his chin on the stone. The cold air of the dungeon on his backside let him know that his clothes had not survived the initial transformation and the reversal. A robe settled itself around him as he struggled to sit and then stand. It dragged the floor and Harry saw that Snape was now without his outer robe.

He rubbed his chin. "Ow."

Snape stepped forward and took hold of the chin in his hand and turned his face up to the light. "Clumsy Gryffindor," he murmured. He pointed his wand at the injured chin and Harry felt a wash of magic lessen the pain.

A knock at the door prevented Harry from any response. Snape scowled but opened the door to admit Minerva and Albus. They both smiled to see Harry standing there.

"Ah, welcome back, my boy." The blue eyes were kind as they smiled at him.

Minerva wasn't so quick to be forgiving. "Yes, welcome back, Mr. Potter. But what in the world were you thinking, to try and make a transformation without ever having studied with a Master?"

Harry looked at the floor and pulled the robe closer around himself. In a quiet voice he answered, "I guess I wasn't thinking at all, Professor. I guess I was just trying to get away before my cousin killed me."

There was silence in the room at that and then Harry looked up at Albus with grim determination. "I'm not going back there, sir. If you make me I'll run away. I'll change into a cat and run away and no one will ever find me."

Albus looked sad while Minerva just pressed her lips together. Snape, surprisingly, broke the silence. "You don't need to threaten the Headmaster, Potter. I doubt he is blind to the dangers you have faced in that household. We all see it now. You won't be going back."

Albus looked as if to argue until Severus glared at him in challenge. "What do you propose we do with Mr. Potter, then? Albus asked. "He cannot stay here at Hogwarts and the Burrow is not warded strongly enough for him to stay there."

Severus scowled. "Grimmauld Place. If the mutt's house is safe enough to be Headquarters, it should be safe enough for the boy."

"He can't stay there alone—" Minerva began.

Harry would never have dreamed of talking back, interrupting, or arguing with his Head of House, so he was surprised himself when he sputtered indignantly, "I've been alone my whole life, Professor. The Dursley's never cared for me, and if you think they did then you are still blind to what kind of life I've had. I never said as much before because I thought that's how it was for everyone. Then, I didn't say anything because I was embarrassed. Now, you've seen how they treated me. I have no pride left for any of you to step on. Think what you will, but I've looked after myself since I was old enough to reach the top of the kitchen counters. I can look after myself just fine now."

He was breathing hard when he finished and a wave of dizziness made him stagger. Snape wordlessly took his elbow and steered him to the sofa. Harry sat down, only because he didn't want to pass out in front of the teachers he had just mouthed off to. That wouldn't have done much for his credibility, or done much to convince them that he could be self-sufficient.

Albus looked at him sadly and Minerva looked as if she wanted to fuss but couldn't find it in herself to. Severus remained silent, observing the boy and noting that he was pale and wincing as he shifted his position. His wounds were still bothering him, the magic expended in the transformation causing a relapse in his recovery.

The room was silent for so long that Harry almost began uttering an apology. Fortunately, Albus heaved a deep sigh and sat down beside him before he did.

"I have been a fool, Harry. In trying to protect you I have left you in peril all these years. I will not ask for your forgiveness just yet, but I will ask that you still obey me in things that I feel are in your best interest."

Harry looked at him suspiciously, the wary cat still close to the surface. When he didn't respond, Albus continued. "I will agree to let you stay there. It is, after all, your house."

Harry looked startled at that, eyes going wide with question. Minerva and Severus snapped their attention to Albus, their expressions disbelieving. Albus nodded and Severus recognized the contrite expression under the beard as one Albus had designed to make the listener sympathetic. Whatever the old man was about to say, it would be something big that might cause Potter to be angry. Severus braced himself.

"Sirius left Grimmauld Place to you."

Harry stared at Albus for a long time as his brain tried to make sense of what the man said. If Sirius had left him the house, then there must have been a will. If there was a will, wouldn't there have been some kind of notification or reading? When had that happened?

"How did you find that out, sir? If Sirius was on the run, he couldn't have had property to leave…"

"Sirius was your godfather, and he was a pureblood heir in his own right. He may have been on the run and unable to access his holdings or accounts, but he had already written his will after you were born. If he had no heirs of his own, you were to inherit the bulk of the Black Estates and vaults. Remus Lupin was the only other recipient and Sirius provided for his friend quite well."

Harry was quiet for a bit and then asked softly, "Why was I never told this?"

"There was no reason to burden you with the particulars, my boy. The vaults are in safe keeping until you reach your majority."

Albus was quite jovial about it, waving a dismissing hand, as if he were not giving Harry information that was a shock. Severus saw the tensing of the boy's jaw as he kept his head bent to look at his lap. His hands were twisting the robe in agitation.

"What else happens when I reach my majority?" Harry asked softly.

Albus frowned slightly and tapped stroked his white beard. "If I recall correctly, the moment you turn seventeen, your allowance, the Hogwarts fund, and the interest from the Black holdings will come under your control. The major bulk of the Potter and Black estates and vaults will remain in trust until your twentieth birthday."

Severus could see that Harry was thinking hard about what Albus was saying. Then Harry said, "I saw the Hogwarts vault when Hagrid took me to Gringotts the first time. I thought that was all there was. It was more money than I had ever seen in my life." He looked up at Albus. "What is an allowance account?"

"Oh, that was the account set up to handle any living expenses while you were growing up. It was for clothing, food, and extra things that would be needed while you were under the guardianship of your aunt. It's a common arrangement that pureblood families make. In the event that children are left orphaned, funds are available to assist the caretakers so that they are not unduly burdened."

Harry stood up and moved away from the sofa. His back was to the Headmaster as he stared into the flames of the fireplace. He was silent for so long that the adults all began to look at each other in question.

A knock at the door took Severus away from his observations. He admitted Poppy, who smiled when she saw that Harry was in human form.

"Well, Harry, if Professor Snape will allow us the use of his bedroom, I'd like to examine you and see how you are coming along."

Severus nodded and went to open the door to his personal chambers. Harry wordlessly preceded Poppy into the room and Severus closed the door.

He looked at Albus with a raised eyebrow. "I am sure that you are aware that the information you are giving him is upsetting him?"

Albus tilted his head. "I know that it is uncomfortable for him to speak of Sirius."

"I am talking about the fact that he likely knew nothing about any of the wealth he was heir to. I know that I find myself surprised. How is it that the boy was always dressed as an urchin, if there was gold available to clothe him properly?"

"I'm sure that the clothing choices he made were because of his muggle influences. That, and the idiosyncrasies of teenagers."

Severus doubted that the old man was in his right mind at that moment. Surely he was not so blind as Severus had been all these years. Surely he had felt the waves of anger rolling off the young man as he sat there questioning the headmaster.

Minerva was simply watching them both, her lips pressed together in a tight line.

In his mind, Severus was already planning to pay a visit to the Dursley's. It was difficult to believe that he had so misunderstood the situation. He was seeing Potter's reaction to Albus's answers and he was seeing that the brat was not as unaffected as Albus seemed to believe. Indeed, he saw an awakening in Potter that bore watching. It bore watching and anticipating what the probable reaction was going to be when it came. And there would be a reaction. Severus was very certain of that.

Albus rose from the sofa and rubbed his hands together. "Well, I'll be off then. He seems on the mend. I'll set up a round of watchers at Grimmauld Place. It would be best, if he is to stay there instead of with his relatives, that there be someone there to watch over him, no matter how he may feel about it."

He strode from the room in his usual flurry of sparkling and colorful robes, leaving Severus and Minerva staring at each other.

Minerva broke the silence by saying, "When it catches up to him, I'm afraid Potter will not handle it well. It is too soon after managing the animagus for him to keep his customary tight rein on his emotions."

To her surprise, Severus did not issue a scathing response about how Potter never kept a tight rein on anything. Instead, he looked at her appraisingly before saying softly, "I am planning to pay a visit to these relatives. Would you care to go along?"

She looked at him over the tops of her glasses and nodded. "I always thought they were the worst sort of muggles. I would be happy to be proven right. Plus, I just might take bite out of that cousin who dares to torture defensless animals."

Severus nodded in agreement. Knocking on his own bedroom door, he opened it to find that Poppy was pulling the coverlet up over Harry's shoulders. He was sound asleep, curled up on his side. Severus's borrowed robe was clenched in his hands and held under his cheek.

Poppy was apologetic. "He was dead tired, Severus, and I didn't have the heart to make him move after he fell asleep. He seemed to be troubled about something and he wouldn't tell me what. It wasn't about the animagus magic, but he looked so lost. Maybe it's just everything all at once that has him more out of sorts than is normal for him. I gave him more potions for internal injuries and another dose of Skelegro, now that he's human. It knocked him right out."

Severus observed the sleeping form silently before shaking his head. "It doesn't matter at the moment." He looked at Poppy. "Can you stay with him? Minerva and I have a matter to take care of."

Poppy nodded. "I'll floo up and get my book and some records that need updating. I'll return in a few."

She stepped out around Minerva and they watched her disappear into the green flames. Severus dimmed the lights in the room before tapping a glowing sphere on the nightstand with his wand. Soft music filled the room as the sphere pulsed with the beat it.

"Why, Severus, I never figured you for a jazz man," Minerva smirked.

"I prefer the classics. I believe Mr. Potter may enjoy jazz more." He looked at her, his expression daring her to further comment. Minerva merely lifted an eyebrow.

Poppy was soon back and settled into a bedside chair. She looked at the two teachers. "I do hope that you will also convey my dislike to the Muggles. Feel free to use any hex on them that is painful," she sniffed as she opened her book.

"How did you know where we were going?" Severus asked .

"Harry knew. He said he thought you would. You should know that he fears that you might kill them and end up in Azkaban for it. He doesn't want that." She looked at her friends and then over at Harry. "The poor child… to be so badly treated… and not to expect any better; to feel he doesn't deserve better. I should have realized all these years. The scans showed the injuries and the malnourishment and I allowed him to tell me it was nothing more than what he received in summer playing and not having the time to eat enough."

Minerva laid a hand on Poppy's shoulder. "We all failed to see it, Poppy. But—" she looked hesitantly down at Harry and then at the two of them. "I think we let Albus convince us that things were not as bad as they would seem. I don't think he meant it maliciously, but his machinations have not given Harry a very nice life, nor an easy one."

She looked at Severus then and squared her shoulders. "Let's go find out the truth."

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A/N: Thank you to everyone reading and reviewing! Miss Muse is so excited to hear from you all.

Just a few brief notes and reminders; this is AU. That means it can happen any way I want it to, sometimes sticking to canon and sometimes not; my fantasy world Based on JKR's phenomenal works.

This will not be a slash fic. At the very least it will be a mentorship fic. I know the premise is not that original, Harry being rescued by Severus. But I hope to put a different spin on the tale (CatTail?)

There will be twists and surprises.