Arthur sat as his desk working on some papers while Merlin moved slowly around the room, tidying up. Now and again Arthur glanced up at him to assess what Merlin was doing. Occasionally he winced, the skin on his back felt tight where the wounds were healing, but two weeks on from their rescue Merlin had to admit he felt much better.
Still Arthur didn't want Merlin doing too much, even though his servant was continually insisting he was fine. Arthur's own condition meant that Merlin was not having to work as hard as usual. The prince wasn't training, or hunting, Gaius had ordered him to rest for at least a month, which was probably longer than it needed but Arthur hadn't risked protesting. Arthur could sense that it wasn't just for him that Gaius was suggesting that length of convalescence time. Arthur didn't want Merlin overdoing it, and it was a way to control him.
It also meant that Arthur had time to do a little research into something that had been on his mind since the kidnapping.
"Where are you going?" Arthur said, not looking up as Merlin's footsteps trailed to the door. They stopped and Arthur looked up as Merlin turned around.
"To muck out the horses."
Arthur put his papers down, glared at Merlin. "I thought Gregory was doing that."
"He is, he was," Merlin said. "I said I would do it today."
"And you're up to heavy lifting are you?" Arthur asked politely.
"Of course I am! I'm fine," Merlin informed him loftily.
"Okay then, you can take the washing while you go," Arthur said, waving at the basket, which Gwen would more than likely pick up later on, as she had also been helping out, so Merlin wasn't stuck doing too much. It wasn't so much the actual washing he couldn't manage, it was the lifting the basket and carrying it. Anything that asked too much of his back caused him pain as the wounds pulled, sometimes bleeding again. There was no doubt that several of them would scar, leaving Merlin, and Arthur, with a permanent reminder of what had happened.
Merlin's false brightness faded a little, a sullen glimmer coming into his eyes when he realised Arthur wasn't going to let him get away with it. The prince had gone from complaining he was useless and didn't do his job properly, to make sure Merlin didn't do anything. Merlin hadn't minded the lighter duties to begin with, but this was getting ridiculous.
"Go on," Arthur said.
"Fine!"
Merlin stalked over to the washing basket, reached down and grabbed the handles with both hands and lifted, restraining his gasp as the stripes across his shoulders burned. Merlin hoisted himself upright and glared at Arthur.
"See?" Merlin snapped. Arthur stared at him for a long moment and then inclined his head.
"Put it down, Merlin."
Merlin looked mulish but did as he was told, dropping the basket, flinching as it landed on his feet. He shuffled backwards to extract his toes from under it.
"Just leave it," Arthur said.
"I can do my own job," Merlin snapped.
"Yes, I know, and normally I'd be ecstatic at your enthusiasm."
Merlin pulled a face, frowning as Arthur carefully started to melt the wax he needed to apply his royal seal to the bottom of the parchment.
"But I need you to do something else. I won't get away with leaving the castle, but you can."
"What for?" Merlin said, frowning. Arthur pressed his seal into the wax and then after checking it turned the paper towards Merlin. Merlin leant over and peered at it, reading what Arthur had written, the final draft of the letter he had been working on over the last two days. Merlin chewed his lower lip as he read Arthur's words, and then he looked up at him. Arthur was eyeing him carefully, and with just a hint of apprehension.
"Are you serious?"
"Very," Arthur said. "I think it's the right thing to do."
"How are you going to do it?" Merlin asked and then his eyes widened. "You're kidding!"
"They probably won't accept it from anyone else, I'm not going to make you go alone Merlin."
"Glad to hear it," Merlin said. "I take it your father doesn't know about this?"
"No, and you're not telling him."
"If I did I wouldn't have to go."
"Merlin!"
And with that Merlin found himself on a horse, riding out of Camelot with the letters Arthur had written carried carefully with him.
XxxxxxxxxxxxxX
The patrol group unsurprisingly consisted of Leon, Rupert, Bors and Oric, and a troop of soldiers. They had been ordered to cover the area where the exchange had taken place. Camelot's patrols had been covering that area ever since Arthur and Merlin had been returned. Arthur had chosen the patrol group specifically with people he trusted to take care of Merlin.
In deference to Merlin's presence the group moved at a slow pace, until they reached their destination. Merlin slowly dismounted and looked around. Leon followed suit and the soldiers fanned out. Merlin felt a little reassured by their presence as he stepped forward, pausing as he looked down at the patch of grass he had almost stepped on.
It was stained brown, with Barak's blood. He was stood on the spot where Arthur had killed him, and Merlin frightened himself by feeling nothing. He didn't even feel angry, or relieved, he just felt nothing at the loss of Barak's life. Arthur felt something, he had been angry, now he felt justified. Barak had been hurting Merlin, threatening him, and Arthur as his master had felt obliged to do something about that. And he had. It probably didn't pull on Arthur's conscience. Barak knew what he was getting into when he had taken the challenge.
What worried Merlin was it didn't bother him either, but not for those reasons. He couldn't find a reason. Most of the time he could understand people's actions, even the people he acted against, when the situation required. Merlin could fathom why people tried to kill Uther, or hurt him by attacking Arthur. Arthur was the biggest target that Uther had, he was heir to the throne of Camelot. That wasn't the reason that Merlin protected him. He protected Arthur because he was… Arthur… that annoying, egotistical prat who also had a sense of honour and duty, and Merlin had the feeling that when he found out Merlin's secret he wouldn't react as his father would. He would know Merlin too well for that, that he meant no harm to Camelot and it's future king. Still that moment wasn't going to happen just yet, so Merlin felt a little vulnerable stood there. He shuffled away, moving around the stained grass, almost to the spot where he had been stood while Arthur fought for his life. If Barak had taken him that day, Merlin knew he was never coming back.
"Merlin," Leon said gently.
Merlin turned and looked up. The bandits had been keeping an eye on the area, four of them appeared in the distance, moving from the cover towards them. Leon looked at the others with him and nodded as he drew his sword. The rest of them followed suit, the knights moving to flank Merlin, and the soldiers stepped up around them. It didn't ease Merlin's worry, especially as he saw I'lian was in the group. Then he felt a flicker of nerves as he realised Galen was also with him.
None of the members of the patrol moved as the bandits headed towards them. Looking into the distance Merlin was certain that he could see others from the outlaws moving as subtly as they could over the moors.
"Now what?" Leon asked Merlin, who shrugged. Instead he took a breath as I'lian paused a short distance away from them, Galen lingering behind him. I'lian turned his impassive gaze to Merlin.
"Merlin," I'lian greeted him with a curt nod.
"Sir I'lian."
I'lian raised his eyebrows at the formal address that had just a touch of sarcasm to it. Merlin watched his reaction.
"I never expected to see you again."
"Nor I you to be honest," Merlin said.
"We've seen the patrols passing here," I'lian said. "Although, they've never ventured this close before."
"You're watching it as well."
"There's always a chance that you might try and backtrack to find our camp, although I doubt that's your intention today. Arthur wouldn't put you at risk, would he?"
Merlin looked around, at the patrol whose only purpose today was looking after him. Arthur could have sent him with just one person, but Merlin found the larger group reassuring, they could take on the bandits if the situation came to that, and it was easier to use magic with a group of people. During a fight there was always more going on, more distractions and less people noticed him. Only Arthur seemed to have any realisation of Merlin's presence during those moments.
"No, probably not," Merlin said.
"So what are you doing here?" I'lian asked. Merlin turned and went to his horse, reaching into the leather bag that was attached to the saddle, pulling out the carefully rolled parchments bound in a red ribbon. Arthur hadn't sealed them up with wax, guessing that I'lian would want to read them. Instead Arthur had put his seal at the bottom of each sheet, so no one would be able to argue with their authenticity.
But what I'lian would make of them was something else entirely. Merlin took a few tentative steps forward towards I'lian and held out the neatly bound up scrolls, holding them out at arms length, waiting for I'lian to take them.
"Arthur just said to leave them, I guess he knew you'd be watching," Merlin said. He wondered, since this was the first time any group had come close to the fateful location, if a watching I'lian had seen him within the group, and that was why he had chosen to move closer this time. Again it was like some kind of unspoken agreement between kidnappers and hostages. It baffled Merlin, the odd etiquettes that people thought up. Although since the whole incident he had learnt that kidnapping rich nobles was quite big business. Some people took the price demanded for them very seriously. Arthur however hadn't really seen it like that, and neither had these bandits, when they realised they had the Prince. It also seemed to have been an ideal time to vent out some very built up frustrations.
At that idle thought Merlin's back started to itch.
I'lian watched him carefully for a moment before stepping forward to take the rolled up parchments. Seeing the flicker on the former knights face Merlin guessed he was tempted to just destroy them without seeing their contents. Knowing what the contents were, Merlin didn't want to let that happen.
"It's more for Galen than you," Merlin said, with what appeared to be just the right tone. I'lian glowered at him and pulled the ribbon clear, letting it drift to the ground, tangling into the long grass at the bandit's feet. It was rescued by Galen, who had stepped forward. He picked it up and carefully smoothed the silky material, winding it around his left hand as he waited. His eyes were staring at the group, taking in the knights and soldiers that were flanking Merlin. Leon had moved closer to Merlin's right, Sir Rupert moving in on the left. The bandits shifted nervously and the tension rippled on the breeze around them while I'lian read the parchment, a frown on his face. Then he held up one sheet.
"What is this?"
"Your patent," Merlin said. "Although in the case of that one, it's technically Galen's. He is the son of a knight."
"Are you serious?"
"It's got Arthur's seal on the bottom, it's perfectly serious."
I'lian glared at Merlin, trying to see if there was any shred of dishonesty to what Merlin was saying. During that pause Galen stepped forward and pulled one of the sheets clear from his father's grip. His eyes scanned the page, a light frown forming on his face before he looked up, staring at Merlin in shock.
"What is this?"
"Recommendation letters to King Olaf's court physician. He's looking for an apprentice, Olaf sent a message to Uther asking if he knew of anyone. Uther passed it onto Gaius, and Arthur, to deal with. Arthur has, and Gaius has backed him up."
"But he doesn't know anything about me."
Merlin raised his eyebrows. "He's seen how you treated Arthur's wounds, and mine. Gaius couldn't find fault with any of it when he followed up the treatment."
There was more Merlin could have said. Gaius had known Galen's mother, so he knew Galen's teacher, and had trusted her. Even Merlin knew enough to know that Galen was more than competent, and probably wouldn't need that much training.
"But I can't go, I'm an outlaw."
"No, you're not," Merlin said. Galen looked down at the letter again, reading it over intensely, looking for anything that could be wrong with it. There wasn't anything.
"What happens if Uther hears of it?" I'lian asked.
"He probably won't. Arthur has left enough hints in the wording of his letter without actually saying anything directly. He and Olaf have a kind of understanding of each other. He doesn't have a great deal of contact with Camelot anyway."
"But…" Galen paused and took the other letter from his father, who passed it over with great reluctance. "Why would Arthur do that?"
I'lian seemed to want to know the same thing, and Merlin had no intention of shirking around that.
"I think Arthur is of the opinion that you shouldn't have to stay here. None of what happened was your fault," Merlin said. I'lian glared at him.
"How dare you!"
Merlin felt Leon tense, but he hid it well enough. I'lian took a step forward, but still stayed far enough back so the tension didn't rise further.
"Well, it's not is it?" Merlin added. "Why should he have to pay the price? Do you really want him to have to live as a bandit for the rest of his life? There is no reason why he should be affected by it."
Even as he said it Merlin knew it wasn't as simple as that. Innocent people were affected by the decisions that other people made. In this case I'lian was affected by Uther, the consequences of which had rolled to Galen. Arthur probably understood it better than most. In a way, Arthur couldn't miss his mother, he had never known her, but the consequences of what happened to her had shaped his entire life. He lived in a kingdom that feared and despised magic, because of Uther.
In the end Merlin would never admit the slowly stirring thought in him to anyone but Arthur, when the time was right. But he could see Uther's point, he could feel Uther's point, as a creature of magic Merlin understood the hold it could have over someone, and what it might do. The thought had processed over time, while he was in Camelot. He knew concealing the truth about himself from Arthur was, for now, the right thing to do.
And when it came to that revelation Merlin trusted Arthur to do the right thing.
"Are you serious? I'd become the King's physician?" Galen asked.
"In time," Merlin said.
"We can't be bribed!" I'lian snarled. Merlin blinked and then shrugged.
"If that's the way you feel," he said, backing up. "I've done what was asked of me."
Merlin turned, he wanted away from this place. All he wanted to do was get back to Camelot. He hadn't even wanted to come, but he had done it, because it was what Arthur wanted. It could simply be that Arthur was trying to ease his own conscience, having seen what Uther had caused, knowing that I'lian had left to save his wife, and young son. Merlin didn't think it was a simple at that, nothing ever was.
He risked one glance back, at least seeing that Galen had possession of all the parchments and was carefully binding them back up again. Hopefully, if the choice was his, he would make the right decision.
XxxxxxxxxxxxxX
The patrol made camp. They were not going to make it back to Camelot within the day. Merlin couldn't tolerate riding that distance. Instead they had hunted through the forest and Leon had taken down a deer. Merlin had scavenged some greens and herbs to go with it to make a fairly reasonable stew.
The soldiers fanned out, some sleeping, some taking the watch. Merlin sat by the camp fire, prodding it with a stick, staring into the flames. Leon sat next to him, taking his duty to look after Merlin a little too seriously. Merlin hadn't even been able to collect firewood without someone in tow.
"I don't get it," Leon eventually said, breaking the peaceful silence between them.
"What?" Merlin asked sounding distracted.
"Why Arthur would do that?"
"He's Uther's conscience," Merlin said without thinking.
"What?" Leon asked, bringing Merlin back to total reality. He turned to look at the knight, who was regarding him with mild shock. Merlin guessed that he had kicked at a boundary that he now shouldn't cross. His bickering with and insults to Arthur were all very well, but Uther was another matter entirely.
"Well, he has a better perspective on some things and he's right, what happened wasn't Galen's fault, but he's the one now suffering for it. Arthur wants to put things right."
"They're bandits, outlaws, how do they understand that?"
Merlin shrugged, and decided he was tired, and he didn't want to have this conversation. He reached for his bedroll to find somewhere to lay it out by the fire. Before he did so, he turned to Leon.
"I think they might understand it better than anyone."