Part two of What it Means. Fenris suspects foul play... Little side note: Luna and Isabela have little pet names Lu/Lulu and Is/Izzy...so creative I know. :-p
Oh Wicked Grace has never been this awkward. Certain nights I come in it's just Varric, Isabela and I. Tonight however, Anders and Fenris decided to join the game. Not only that but I have the pleasure of sitting in-between them. I'm at the head of the table; Fenris is at the bench to my right side, and Anders at my left. Varric is next to Fenris, Isabela by Anders.
After a good hour of semi silent playing, Anders decides to talk, and I regret he ever did.
He periodically looks over at Fenris. "You know, I can't imagine what Hawke sees in you."
Maker, you've got to be kidding me.
Fenris won't return his glances. "It is done. Leave it be." His voice is so callous. I try to focus on my cards and not on his tone.
Anders smirks at the answer. "Well, good I always knew she had some sense." He tries to send me a sly smile but ignore his gesture.
Why are you doing this?
Fenris scowls at the mage. "Do not make light of this. Leaving was the hardest thing I've ever done."
Now, Isabela decides to chime in. "Will you two get over yourselves? You're like two dogs around a bitch in heat."
Fenris lays down his cards. "We're talking about Hawke, not you." The pirate only rolls her eyes, but I can't take anymore.
"You know I would really appreciate if you all didn't talk like I wasn't at least two feet away from you." I still can't bring my eyes to Fenris, but I have to ask.
"And if it was the hardest thing you ever done why do it in the first place?"
He refuses to look at me. "You wouldn't understand."
I place my hands on the table and stand up. "How can I understand if you don't tell me? Why can't anyone tell me anything?" I try to be as quiet as possible to not draw too much attention to the table. My first victim is Anders. "You won't tell me more about your 'Mage revolution' regardless of the fact that I'm a Mage." then Isabela, "You wouldn't tell me about the relic." finally Fenris, "And you... Well, you won't really tell me anything." He looks away in frustration.
"It seems the only person that's full of bullshit but at least lets me in on it is Varric!"
I get a short chuckle from him, but there's hardly anything funny about this.
"Enough of this, I'm going home. Is, you still owe me. I may be upset but I'm not going to forget those three sovereigns.
"Oh, goody." She says, taking a sip of her whiskey.
"You want me to walk you home Hawke?" Varric looks a bit concerned.
I sigh and shake my head. "No thanks I have my dog with me, I'll be fine."
"Hmph, which one?" Anders mutters under his breath.
"Anders!" My eyes grew wide knowing that this won't end well, but then again it didn't start out well.
Fenris bursts from his seat, "That's it Mage!"
Anders follows suit. "Good, it's about time!"
My jaw clenches and I bring my hands to my temples. This has all gone too far.
"Enough!"
In one swift burst I manage to separate them. Unfortunately, both men are also on the ground, looking up at me in shock along with the rest of the patrons.
I look at both of them and shake my head. "I'm done."
I whistle for Xander and leave the tavern.
I'm at my desk with a bottle of wine, writing about tonight's interesting confrontation. There's a knock at my door. Bodahn tells me I have a visitor, also that he and Sandal is taking Xander for a walk.
Andraste's ass, now what?
I walk out to the balcony to see my guest. It's Fenris and somehow he looks angrier then when I left. No wonder they took the dog out.
I sigh and make my way down the stairs. "I told the both of you I was done. Why-"
He rushes towards me, his eyes filled with anger.
"Why are you with him? You could be with anyone else, why him?"
I back away from him confused. "Who are you even talking about?"
"That Mage?" The venom that carried in the word Mage was potent.
"Anders? I'm not with him." I declare, crossing my arms.
"Don't lie to me Hawke, I saw him come in here." He starts to point at me then to the door. The more he talks the more irritated he becomes.
"When did you-" Then everything falls into place. My eyes narrow on the elf. "You? You were watching me a few nights ago weren't you?"
He turns away from me. "I wanted to talk to you but I saw your brother, I didn't want to intrude." His voice and face became harsh again. "Then I saw him and heard your laughter, so I left."
I look away. I can't defend that, I feel so stupid. Maker what have I done? What have we done? We've made ourselves crazy over this and for no reason.
"Well he's not here and I don't think he'll be back."
He shakes his head, doubtful. "But I saw-"
"Yes, you saw him walk through my door, but not how he left." I turn away from him and try to direct my attention to the fireplace. "Keep in mind I thought this was what you wanted; what I wanted. You said you wanted space, I gave you space." I turn around and I'm surprised to see how close he is to me now. His stare is intense and catches me off guard. My eyes dart away from his glance.
"He called you a beast. I couldn't just let him talk about you like that. I told he had no idea what he was talking about, among other things, and asked him to leave."
"Really?" He brings his hand to his chin thinking. Everything is still a little clouded, but he looks somewhat pleased with that outcome.
"Yes really." I start fumbling with my fingers. "Look, I'm sorry about what I said in the Hanged Man. You have told me things that must have been very hard to talk about, and I appreciate that you've put your trust in me." There is so much desire to reach out to him. However, I know the time isn't right. I wonder when it ever will be, but that decision is not in my hands. There is a moment of uneasy silence accompanied by awkward glances across the room.
My eyes drift down to his wrist. A familiar object brings a smile to my face.
"It's funny you talking asking for distance yet you still have my scarf on your wrist."
He gives me a hurt look, but extends his hand out to me. "If you wish it back, it is yours."
I take his hand in my own looking down at the wrapped scarf. "No, I will always stand by my favor, as well as the man wearing it."
He pulls me in and holds me. My arms wrap around his neck and I feel complete again. Sharp gauntlets gently scratch at my lower back sending tiny tremors throughout my body. He bows his head and our foreheads touch. We stand there and enjoy the quiet for a while, but I decide to break the silence. "So does this mean the break's off?" I give a hopeful smile.
He softly chuckles pulling me closer. "For the most part." His lips brush mine but he pulls away and smirks. His eyes show his intent though his body won't heed it.
Bloody Void, why are you doing this to me?
My body is screaming for him but we both know Bodahn and Sandal could return at any time. We release our hold and Fenris walks over to the door with me in tow.
"So," I start to say.
He stops, waiting for me to continue.
"Wicked Grace at your place tomorrow night?" I ask with a coy smirk.
He opens the door, looks over his shoulder and smiles. "As you wish." He whispers as he walks out into the night air.