Ianto looked at himself in the mirror. His new bar uniform made him look very swathe, even if he did say so himself. It had been relatively easy, once he had convinced Jack, to get the job. Hardly any questions were asked and they were low on bar staff anyway. He stepped out in to the empty club and took his position behind the bar as the first punters were let in. He took a deep breath and smiled.

--

"Ok, Tosh, you keeping an eye on Ianto?"

"Yes, Jack…I managed to get all the CCTV from the club…there's none in the back rooms though."

"How convenient." Owen said.

"Ok, Gwen, do you fancy a night on the town?" Jack said with a million dollar smile.

"Always." She replied.

"Why can't I go?!" Owen demanded.

"Oh yeah, you're gonna look real good standing there all night with wet pants!"

"I won't drink."

"That won't look suspicious at all(!)"

"You can keep Tosh company!" Gwen said brightly.

"I brought sandwiches." Tosh said timidly.

"Shame I can't eat them then really, isn't it Tosh?" Owen sighed. "Go on, go."

Gwen and Jack exited the Hub quickly and emerged in to the cold night.

"It's a bit nippy." Gwen said, stating the obvious.

"Well let's get moving then."

--

Smash. A glass hit the floor.

Ianto groaned as the manager came around the corner.

"Jones, is it?" he demanded.

"Yes, sir."

"First name?"

Ianto cringed. "Tom."

"So your name is Tom…Jones?"
"Yes, sir."

"Are you trying to be funny, boy?" the manager said, drawing himself to his full height of 5' 4".

"No, not at all." Ianto explained, cursing Gwen for her input in the creation of Ianto's alias. "My mother was a very big fan…knicker-throwing and all the rest…"

The manager stared at him with beady eyes for a few seconds, before breaking in to a toothy grin. "My wife's exactly the same…in fact she said I look a bit like him, what do you think?"

Ianto glanced at the short, broad man. He had the hair…but that was about it.
"Oh…you're much better-looking, sir." Ianto lied.

The manager laughed. "Call me Jack." Shaking Ianto's hand and striding off.

Why? Why did he have to be called Jack? This could get very confusing.

Just then, his phone rang: "It's not unusual to be loved, by anyone…". At that moment, he REALLY hated Gwen.

"Tom, it's Jack."

"Oh hey, Jack."

"Just to let you know Gwen and I are on our way…how's your job going?"

"Oh, quite well. The manager liked my name. Mm…shame I can't say the same for the other bar staff. I've had knickers falling out of my locker ever since I got here! Where do they get them from?!"

He heard Gwen stifling a laugh on the other side of the line.

"Tell Gwen I hate her Jack."

"Will do…anyway…you be careful…we don't know what's going on or who's in on it!"

"Jack, I'll be fine." Ianto replied, before closing down the phone.

"Girlfriend trouble?" Jack the manager said, once again rounding the corner.

"N-yes." He couldn't see Jack the manager being accepting of homosexuals.

"Women." He said. "I'm guessing Jack is short for Jacqueline?"

"Yeah."

"You ought to be careful! You don't want people to think you're going out with a guy. That's seen as…a bit funny here."

"Well, there's no worries there then." Ianto smiled falsely.

The manager nodded and disappeared once again. Ianto sighed as he leant on the bar. So his manager was a possible homophobic alien. Things just kept getting better.