A/N: Where to start. Writing this chapter felt a bit like trying to walk a tightrope, and almost falling off constantly. I think it's the most challenging chapter I've written. Not because of flow issues, but because of the emotions the characters were asking me to convey. If emotions were logical and straightforward, I would have had better luck with this chapter, but sometimes I think they are contradictory, constantly changing, and sometimes slippery. Trying to pin down what both of them were feeling was...difficult. I'm not sure I quite managed it. At this time, I'm not sure it makes sense, but I hope it does.

I started the chapter over eleven times, before something stuck. So apologies for the late update. I hope you enjoy...

Chapter 15

Elena woke up some time around eight o'clock on Sunday morning. She rolled over, expecting to find her bed empty. It wasn't. She couldn't stop the small smile that tugged at her lips as she watched Damon sleep for a moment. He didn't stir at all, as she softly slipped out of her bed and headed for the shower. When they had both hopped into bed last night they'd been exhausted, but it hadn't stopped them from finding each other in the middle of the night and coupling again anyway.

She wasn't going to delude herself into thinking that his still being here meant something. She stood under the hot spray for a while and tried to work out what they would pass this night off as. They had tried having a 'once off', they had tried having a fling, and then they had tried to end it. What now? Where did they go from here? They had no hope of avoiding each other in a town this size, and he was still her client.

Staying on at Mystic Falls PR now, however, was pointless. Last night she'd been too shocked to think properly, but after sleeping on it, she realized working for a boss that wanted to fire her was absurd. If Elijah wanted her to leave, she would, but she would do it on her terms. If she bought in with Rose and the others, she would be her own boss. No more Katherine. The thought made her smile. It would be a challenge, but she'd wanted more challenging work anyway. She had savings. It was completely doable. The more she thought about it, the more excited she became.

She had a huge grin on her face as she walked back into her room. It vanished as soon as she saw Damon.

"Damon, what are you doing?"

"Trust me, Elena, not even I'm this kinky."

"Mr Blobby, get down."

"Mreow."

"Mr Blobby!"

Elena scooped the cat off Damon's lap, and held him against her chest as she removed her vibrator from Damon's hand. "Where did you get this?"

"It was in one of your drawers."

"You've been through my drawers."

"You left me. I was bored. You locked the bathroom door," he accused.

"Habit," she told him. "What just happened?"

"I was looking through your drawer. I pulled out that, and then your cat attacked me."

"Mr Blobby isn't normally so affectionate with strangers. He must like you," Elena told him, as she absently scratched Mr Blobby under the chin.

"Ugh, you're one of those people," he said to her.

"One of what people?" she asked, confused.

"You're a cat person."

"They're independent and I don't spend a lot of time at home," she told him. "I suppose this means you're not a cat person."

"Dog is man's best friend," he told her.

Elena rolled her eyes. "I like dogs. I just don't have time for one."

Damon frowned as he looked at Mr Blobby again. "He's huge."

"He's on a diet," Elena told him, somewhat defensively.

When Mr Blobby jumped out of her arms, Damon wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her down so that she was sitting across his lap. The towel that had been wrapped around her tightly came undone. The heat in his eyes was so intense, she could barely breathe. It didn't take long for him to work her up to a fever pitch using his hands and mouth all over her, and just when she thought they were getting to the good stuff, he told her he wanted to watch her use her vibrator.

"Damon!"

"You have somewhere to be?"

"No."

"Good."

When they emerged from the bedroom hours later, they were both in need of sustenance. Damon searched through her cupboards looking for something worth eating.

"You don't have any food here," he grumbled.

"What do you call cereal, fruit and toast?"

"Rabbit food," he said with disgust.

"Where are you going?" she asked.

"To buy real food," he told her, putting his boots on. "Back in ten."

Elena watched him leave and acknowledged she wasn't ready to say goodbye to him again. She knew it was coming. She knew they would have to talk about last night, and this morning, but right now she was feeling giddy with happiness. It was a Sunday, the sun was shining, and Damon was coming back. She pushed thoughts of later out of her mind and tried to enjoy the moment.

True to his word he was back inside ten minutes, with coffee and an assortment of mouth watering pastries.

"The bakery was the only thing open," he told her.

"I'm going to quit," she told him, as they sat eating. "What's the point in working for a boss who's trying to get me fired?"

"It doesn't make sense," Damon told her.

"Exactly."

"I mean, why would he want to have you fired?"

"I don't know, but I'm not going to stick around and find out."

Damon nodded. "Rose gets back into town on Tuesday."

"I'll give her a call then." she told him.

It didn't escape her attention that once she left Mystic Falls PR, she would be able to date her clients if she wanted to. Then again, Damon wouldn't be her client anymore. As far as she knew he was locked into a six month contract with Mystic Falls PR and his publicity would be assigned to someone else. She would have to give two weeks notice, but if she resigned tomorrow, she would officially be free from those work place restrictions within a fortnight.

Damon had made it clear he didn't want a relationship of any kind, so would she see him after she quit her job? He'd stuck around to protect her, but what would happen once she no longer needed his protection? Would she be subjected to seeing him around town with his latest one night stand? She felt her mood take a dive. She was contemplating asking him if there was anything more in their future when she heard her phone vibrate against the bench.

Damon watched Elena pick up her phone and smile when she looked at the screen.

"Who's that smile for?" Damon asked, before he could stop himself.

"Caroline. Stefan asked her to go out on Thursday night."

"Stefan asked Caroline out?"

"They met at the bar on Friday night," Elena told him, as she texted Caroline back.

"Elena, were you at the bar on Friday night?"

Elena looked up at him, realizing what she'd just said. "Yes, I was there."

She looked at her phone again.

"Did you see me there?"

"Mm-hmm," she mumbled, studying her phone intensely.

"You didn't say anything."

"I didn't see the point."

At the time Elena had thought it was over, and she hadn't seen it as her business. Now, she realized she didn't want to know if he'd slept with anyone else. She'd been upset enough after seeing him with the other woman, and she didn't want to experience that heartache all over again. He saw through her so easily, and after her slip last night, she didn't want to give anything else away.

"I didn't even see you there. Where were you sitting?" he asked her.

"A booth up the back."

"Missy is an old girlfriend of mine," he told her.

"I don't need to know, really. It's over; what we had is over."

He was watching her so intensely that she squirmed a little under his gaze. She hoped she wouldn't have to listen to his whole, 'I don't do relationships' speech again. That would be unbearable. The bubble she'd been in since she woke up popped abruptly. They had no future; he had told her that. Sleeping with him this morning and last night had just set back any progress she might have made otherwise. All she needed now was for him to realize how she felt about him so she could really feel like a fool.

"What do you call last night and this morning?" he asked her.

She swallowed. "We slipped."

It was the first thing that popped into her head.

"We slipped?"

"Yes, we slipped. It was a mistake. After the tour it was probably always going to happen."

"Last night you said you never wanted it to end."

Her heart hammered away violently, as his eyes held hers. "I was caught up in the moment."

"That's all?"

She nodded. "I mean, you don't want anything more, do you, Damon?"

Damon was more than a little surprised by her assessment of what they'd done. Both of them knew it was more than a slip, but now that he was in the hot seat, he found himself starting to sweat again. Every time she brought up the idea of something more, his body almost shut down in panic mode. She didn't understand; she couldn't understand that he could never be what she wanted him to be.

"No. I don't want anything more."

"So, it's over then."

"It's over," he repeated.

Damon finished his mouthful and then threw what he was eating in the bin. He'd suddenly lost his appetite.

"I should make a move," he told her.

"It was good to see you," she said stiffly.

"You're going to talk to Rose on Tuesday?" he asked her.

"Yes. I need you to come into the office on Wednesday and read over one of the articles being printed next week, too."

"Who will take over my publicity when you leave?"

"I don't know, but I'll let you know as soon as I find out."

"I'll see you on Wednesday," he said to her, and then he left.

After he'd gone, Elena told herself now it was over. She'd had a setback, but that would be the last one. They were over for good, and she needed to come to terms with it.

When Elena went into the office on Monday, she typed out her resignation letter straight away and sent it up to Elijah, who immediately ordered her to come up.

"I don't really understand, Elena. You're in line for a promotion. We're the biggest company in town. Why would you want to leave?"

"I have enjoyed working here, and I have learned a lot, but I feel it's time to move on."

"What do you intend to do next?"

"I haven't quite made up my mind yet."

"It's unlike you to be flippant about something as important as your future. You've always been one of our most ambitious employees. We don't want to lose you, Elena."

"I appreciate that, but my mind is made up."

"This doesn't have anything to do with your client, does it?"

"Which client?" Elena asked, knowing full well which client he was talking about.

"Damon Salvatore. I know there was an incident on tour."

Elena froze for a moment. "Incident?"

"You missed your flight."

"Yes that. It had nothing to do with Damon."

"And your leaving?"

"Also has nothing to do with him."

"I'd like you to give careful consideration to this again, Elena. Are you sure, this is what you really want?"

She nodded. "Yes."

"Well, if you change your mind let me know."

Once she stepped back inside her office she felt a curious mix of emotions. She felt relieved her meeting with Elijah was over. She felt angry that she had been targeted by him so unfairly, as well as confused because she didn't know why. She felt a little sorry that her time here was over. She'd spent years here, imagining herself in a corner office, as one of the partners. As much as she had loathed her encounters with Katherine, her time here had been rewarding and she would miss the place. She would miss her assistant. Caroline had loyally pledged to follow her across, but Elena doubted there would be money in the budget for an assistant at this stage.

"If you want in, Elena, you have to know up front it's going to be tough," Rose told her, when she went to see her on Tuesday night.

"I don't mind hard work, Rose."

The other woman smiled at her. "Yes, I remember. Still, I really need you to understand it won't be easy sailing."

"I can handle it."

As Rose rattled off the costs of what they were looking at to start the company, Elena was a little shocked. She hadn't expected the amount of money to be quite so large.

"It's a lot of money to be investing in a business which has so much potential to fail. The other girls are prepared, but Elena you could join another company. You don't have to do it this way."

Elena nodded, thinking it over. It was a lot of money, and it would be a huge risk, but some things were worth risking everything for. If she lost what she invested she could bounce back. She was young, she was resilient, and as Rose said, she still had her name. She would just have to join another PR company if theirs failed. She loved PR, she knew it well. She wanted to be in her own company, as her own boss, and she wanted the challenge. Yes it was scary, but it was also exciting.

"I want this," Elena assured her. "I want in."

Rose seemed happy with her answer, and told her Lexie and Anna would be happy to have her on board. After all, the costs split four ways instead of three would be easier on all of them. If only there was some way to increase their chances of survival.

"Damon mentioned that there was information that could bring down Mystic Falls PR," Elena said casually.

"No way, Elena, That would be a suicide mission. It's too difficult to access, and if you got caught before you found the information you could be arrested. We could really use someone who hasn't had their name dragged through the mud."

Elena knew she had a point, but she wasn't entirely convinced. When she saw Damon on Wednesday she wanted to ask his opinion on it. Unfortunately, the office wasn't the best place to discuss it, and Elena didn't want to see him outside of work when they were trying to stop their affair. It was best to leave well alone and keep their interaction to a minimum. Their meeting was strained and stilted, but Elena hadn't expected anything less. Damon left the minute they finished their business.

When she walked into the bar on Friday night she was desperately in need of a drink. She was earlier than usual because she'd cut back on her overtime since she'd resigned. Bonnie and Caroline had yet to arrive, so she took a seat at the bar and waited for them to come in. She'd only been there for a minute when someone sat down beside her.

"Buy you a drink?"

She smiled when she turned in her seat she saw it was Stefan's friend, Chris.

"I thought you had a gig on tonight."

"I thought so too. We got pulled at the last minute."

"Damn," Elena said. "That sucks."

"Not if I get to buy you a drink," he said to her, all smiles.

"Well if buying me a drink will improve your evening…"

"Oh, it will," he assured her.

"Well, I won't say no then. Are you here with Stefan?" Elena asked.

She looked around for Damon's brother, but didn't see him with all the other accountants at the table they'd been at last Friday.

"He's supposed to be here already."

"I'm waiting for Caroline and Bonnie," Elena told him.

"Great, we'll wait together."

When Damon walked into Ric's on Friday night, it was with the intention of drinking himself under the table. The last thing he expected to see, as he made his was to the bar, was Elena laughing and flirting with some guy. As he drew closer he realized he knew the guy. Christopher Tascone was one of Stefan's best friends. Chris had spent enough time over at their house when they were teenagers, and Damon knew him pretty well. He'd always liked Stefan's outgoing friend – until now.

Chris saw him approaching them, and grinned and waved. Damn it, why couldn't he be some asshole who had his hands all over Elena so Damon could punch him out without feeling guilty?

"Long time no see, man," Chris said to him, shaking his hand.

"You here with Stefan?" Damon asked him.

"Waiting for him. You know Stefan; he always spends an hour in front of the mirror, styling his hair. You know Elena?" Chris asked.

"I do. Elena," he acknowledged.

"Damon," she returned formally.

"You guys work together, right?" Chris asked them.

"Damon is my client," Elena told him.

Damon wanted to tell Chris that they'd spent the better part of the last month in bed with each other, but what did that mean? Nothing, because he'd said he didn't want anything more. Now he was getting an inkling of the consequences of that decision and he didn't like it at all. Damon knew body language, and he could tell Chris liked Elena. The guy was smitten. Well he could get in line.

What surprised Damon was the fact that she was interested. Even if she wasn't sending out over the top signals, she liked him. He should have seen this coming. Had he really expected her to continue living the nun-like lifestyle she'd lived before him? When Marc had asked her out, he had been able to confidently tell her the guy was a prick; but Chris was a nice guy. He couldn't warn her off Stefan's friend.

The three of them chatted awkwardly for a few minutes. Damon was aware of Chris giving him the signal to leave, but Damon played dumb. He wasn't quite ready to leave them to it. It was a relief when Damon spotted Stefan walk through the door with Caroline.

"Oh look, Stefan's arrived," Damon said to Chris.

"Coming?" Chris asked Elena.

"Yeah," Elena said, grabbing her drink.

Damon reached out and grabbed her upper arm, holding her in place. "Elena, I need to talk to you."

Chris paused, waiting for her. When Damon didn't remove his hand, effectively keeping her in place, she told Chris to go on ahead. Chris gave him a questioning look but then left them.

"What is it Damon?" she asked him, once Chris was out of earshot.

"Are you going to sleep with him?"

Her eyes glittered dangerously as they latched onto his. "You don't get to ask me that. I didn't ask you about Missy."

"I didn't sleep with her."

"And I haven't slept with Chris."

Damon was very aware she hadn't actually answered his question. "You like him."

"What if I do?" she asked him. "Would you have anything to say?"

Just like clockwork his body started to shut down again. He couldn't think clearly. His hands were clammy, his heartbeat was erratic, and he felt like passing out. His chest was tight, and he could barely breathe. She didn't deserve someone who had this reaction every time she asked for more. Chris would be able to give her everything he couldn't. Elena deserved to have it all.

"Chris is a nice guy," he told her.

"I'm glad you approve," she told him frostily, before marching away.

He sat down at the bar, taking the exact seat she had been occupying and ordered a drink. When he looked for her again, he noticed she was sitting in a booth with Stefan, Chris, Caroline, and another two people he hadn't met before. Every time she smiled, the knife in his heart twisted just that little bit further. She was happy. She was happy in her little group, and he'd never been so jealous to not be part of something in his life. Chris was sitting with his arm around her, and they were all laughing. She looked up and noticed him watching her. He raised his glass slightly. She was moving on. It was what he wanted for her. He needed to do the same.

He downed one glass, after another, after another. When a scantily clad redhead sidled up to him, he gave her his attention. She was attractive, and he could put up with her blathering on about the latest football scores and the weather, because she was looking for a one night stand. When she offered to buy him a drink, he didn't say no. She was exactly what he needed right now.

Damon wasn't distracted enough to miss when Elena left with her group of friends. Chris still had his arm around her. He hadn't left her side all night. Would she go home with him tonight? Would he go back to her place? He tortured himself with the images of her in bed with Chris, until the redhead noticed he wasn't paying attention and moved onto someone else. He couldn't bring himself to care. He kept drinking until the bartender cut him off.

"Go sleep it off, buddy. Tomorrow is a brand new day."

Damon resisted the urge to reach over the counter and rip his throat out. He staggered out of the bar and fumbled for his keys, but when he couldn't even insert them into the ignition he decided he'd better walk. He started walking home, but at some point he realized instead of walking home he'd walked right up to her apartment building. Before he could think better of it he was making his way to her door. He'd made a mistake by suggesting they should stop their thing when they got back to Mystic Falls. Sure it was dangerous, but they could be careful. Nothing needed to change. Why couldn't they continue what they'd had on tour?

"Elena!" Bang, bang, bang. "Elena!"

One of the neighbours told him not so politely to shut it.

"You wanna step out here and…"

He was cut off when Elena opened her apartment door and forcibly yanked him into her apartment.

"What are you doing here, Damon?"

"I wanted to see you."

"You can't just show up here after midnight and make this much noise. You'll have me evicted."

"I'll be quiet then," he whispered theatrically.

"You're drunk."

"I was drunk. After a thirty minute walk here, I'm almost sober."

"I doubt that."

Damon took in the short lilac nightgown she was wearing.

"God, you're so beautiful."

"Damon-"

Elena stopped breathing as he fingered the strap of the nightie she was wearing. He brushed his lips across her shoulder, causing her to shiver in response.

"We're over, Damon."

"You said you don't want it to end."

"I was caught up in the moment."

"You're lying, Elena. You don't want this to be over any more than I do."

Elena felt time stop. He didn't want it to be over. For a moment she felt hope well within her, before she remembered he was only talking about their sexual relationship. While she had been happy with their arrangement on tour, she hadn't been in love with him then, or at least she hadn't known she was. She needed more from him.

"I want a relationship, Damon. Can you give me that?"

His eyes collided with hers. "I'm fucked up, Elena. You don't want a relationship with me."

His eyes pleaded with her to understand. Elena wasn't going to stand there and argue with him about whether he was fucked up or not. He believed what he believed, and until he changed what he thought about himself, nothing would change between them. She could stand there and try and persuade him otherwise, but it wouldn't make any difference. He wouldn't let her in; he wouldn't talk to her about his past, and he wouldn't accept her opinion over his own.

"Sleep on the couch tonight," she told him.

She didn't want him wandering around town drunk. She left him standing there and closed the bedroom door behind her. She could take what he was offering, but where would it lead? She wanted a relationship. She didn't want it to be over between them, but she needed more than the promise of sex until he tired of her. If she allowed herself to fall any further in love with him, she would shatter apart when it was over.

After she had curled up in bed and closed her eyes, the bedroom door creaked open. She heard him undress, and then she felt him get into bed beside her. When his arms reached for her and wrapped around her, her whole body went rigid.

"Can't we just keep doing what we were doing on tour?" he asked her.

Her heart squeezed painfully. She turned around in the circle of his arms. Even without the lamp on, she could see him well enough in the pale moonlight streaming through the window. His eyes searched hers. They had to end it, for good. She needed to say goodbye to him, and she needed to mean it.

"Damon-"

He cut her off with a kiss. She tried to stop him; she tried to push him away, but he wouldn't let her. He was immovable. Every time he touched her, he had the capacity to make her lose her mind, and forget everything she needed to remember. She found herself being feverishly propelled into depths that threatened to drown her. With every touch, every caress, and every kiss between them, her resistance was worn down bit by bit. He would have to be the one to let go, Elena acknowledged. She would never be able to stand firm against his carnal desire.

Damon felt the change in her attitude as Elena kissed him back, and she ran her palm over his stomach and into his boxers, wrapping her hand around him. She worked her hand up and down his shaft.

"That feels so good, baby."

After a while she moved to straddle him. He watched her pull the lilac slip she was wearing over her head; her now naked body almost glowing in the pale moonlight. For a moment he'd believed she was going to tell him to leave her apartment and not come back. He couldn't let her go. He couldn't lose her. He wasn't going to screw this up. He couldn't afford to. She pressed an open mouthed kiss to his chest before putting her hands inside the elastic of his boxers and working them off his hips, and down his legs. As she positioned herself over him, she locked eyes with him and slid his cock into her wet heat.

"Elena-"

"It always feels so good."

"I know, baby. I know."

She began to rock her hips, and he watched, hypnotized, as she gave herself over to the sensations she was experiencing. His hands cupped her breasts and he ran his thumbs over the already hardened peaks. She looked like some kind of goddess as she threw her head back. With the amount of alcohol he'd consumed, he thought it would keep his orgasm at bay, but when she started to move her hips in a circle, he knew he wasn't going to have any trouble reaching his own release.

Her moans were becoming more frequent, and he moved one hand to where their bodies were joined. Eager to watch her fall apart, he teased her gently with his thumb. He loved watching her climax, and tonight was no different. As she reached her peak, her body tightened around his, she moaned his name, and she looked at him like he was a god. He followed her over the edge quickly, and she collapsed on top of him.

Neither of them said a word afterward, but he held her tightly against him. She wanted a relationship. He'd promised himself he'd never get involved again. The idea of trying a relationship still made him break into a cold sweat; but then so did the idea of her being with someone else. When she'd walked out of that bar with Chris tonight, he'd known for real he wasn't ready to let her go. He would never forgive himself if he hurt her, but he couldn't walk away again. Almost losing her tonight had scared him shitless. He heard her breathing change, signaling she was asleep, but he felt the need to tell her his thoughts anyway.

"I love you, Elena. We'll try it your way."

A/N: To everyone who's reading and everyone who is reviewing, I sincerely thank you. Honestly, I feel so lucky so many of you share your thoughts with me. Yeah, I know how lucky I am. One of my wonderful readers asked me how many chapters I think I have left in this story, and I estimate somewhere between 16-20 chapters. While I have the story mapped out, things don't always go to plan with these guys. This is a really long story for me, so I hope you are still enjoying it. I talked about progress last chapter, and I think they are making it. I hope you think so too. I also tried my hand at humor in this chapter. Not sure if I pulled it off. Anyway, enough rambling from an insanely tired pregnant woman. Thanks for reading, and please review.

Lots of Love,

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