Blue

Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Jane Rizzoli and Maura Isles do not belong to me. No infringement intended and no profit will be made from their use.

Jane is standing over Bobby Marino as he kneels at her feet. "Please Jane, I didn't mean to hurt anybody, this is all just a misunderstanding, please don't shoot me." Jane doesn't respond but just circles Marino until she is standing behind him. She raises the gun, pulls the trigger, and Marino slumps forward on the ground.

Jane sat up straight on the couch, breathing heavily. "It was a just a dream, just a dream," she said to herself, resting her elbows on her knees and holding her head in her hands. Jane looked around the apartment and saw that it was still only just after 8pm. She had fallen asleep on the couch while waiting for the Bruins game to start. "Fuck!"

Jane had had versions of that dream since she'd left the hospital. The day before she was discharged Korsak finally told her that Bobby was dead. The bullet had traveled through Jane in an upward trajectory and pierced Bobby's heart and right lung. It had not occurred to Jane that Bobby would die, she was just trying to incapacitate him. She needed the standoff to be over so help could get help to Frankie. She realized no one was going to shoot at Bobby while she was so close to him, so Jane shot him herself.

Bobby was not the first person Jane had killed. She killed Hoyt's apprentice and some days she wished she had just fucking killed Hoyt. After what happened with Lola, Emily, whatever the fuck her name was, after Frankie had to kill her before she killed them, Jane was going to shoot Hoyt in the fucking head until she was out of bullets if she ever saw him again.

But Bobby was a cop. Jane had known him for years. She had worked with him before. He was dirty, really dirty, but that didn't mean he should be killed. As far as Jane knew, nobody even knew why Bobby had flipped.

Jane wondered what Maura thought. Did Maura understand why she did what she did. Maura wasn't judgmental, she was probably the least judgmental person Jane knew. But did she judge Jane for killing Bobby? Could Maura forgive her when Jane didn't think she could ever forgive herself? Was that what had caused Maura to disappear from her life?

She went into the bathroom and washed her face. Everyday this week had been the same. Two hours of physical therapy in the morning, meeting with the BPD psychiatrist after lunch, working out on her own after that, and falling asleep on the couch after dinner. The rehab was exhausting, but tonight the dream made Jane restless. She grabbed her coat and car keys and walked out to her car.

Sitting in her car, Jane debated her next move. Finally she punched open her glove compartment and grabbed the napkin with Sara's number. She typed out a text: "Hey its Jane from the bar last week. Are you free for a drink?"

A few minutes later Jane's phone buzzed: "Meet you at the bar in an hour."

Jane started the car and drove north towards Somerville, arriving at the bar a good 30 minutes early. She sat down at the same spot at the bar and ordered a whiskey chilled, needing something a little stronger tonight than her normal beer. She was throwing back her third when Sara entered the bar.

"Whoa, slow down tiger," Sara said when she saw the three empty shot glasses.

"I'm fine," Jane responded.

"Hmm. Wanna get out of here?" Jane nodded and followed Sara outside. "Just so we're clear, I'm taking you to my apartment, okay? I live only two blocks away, why don't you leave your car here and we can walk."

"Sure," Jane agreed. "You could have just told me to meet you at your house, you know."

"Well, I did want to get a drink. I didn't expect you to be three drinks in already when I got to the bar, or I would have just invited you over. I prefer the women I sleep with to be able to remember it the next day."

Jane's eyes went wide, "Jesus, you don't play around, huh?"

"What would the point of that be? I wanted to sleep with you as soon as I first saw you, before I even realized who you were. And I assume that's why you contacted me tonight." Sara led Jane inside an older house on one of the countless one way streets in Somerville and upstairs to her second floor apartment.

Once inside Jane had her first real chance to take a look at Sara. She took off her coat revealing a very tight, very low cut v-neck cashmere sweater and dark jeans tucked into almost knee-high boots with what seemed to Jane to be dangerously narrow and high heels. "You like what you see?"

Jane smiled. "Sorry, I didn't mean to stare. But yes, you look...really good."

Jane held her breath as Sara walked behind her and gently pulled off Jane's coat. "This is your first time with a woman?"

It was a question phrased as a statement. "It's that obvious?" Jane asked.

"A little. But your last opportunity to back out tonight is rapidly approaching."

"This is very unlike me. I mean, hooking up with someone I barely know is very unlike me. But, I'm happy to be here right now."

Sara took Jane's hand and led her down the hall to her bedroom. "Why now?"

"I'm tired of pretending and ignoring my...desires. I guess I have a new awareness of my own mortality."

"Why did you pretend before?"

"It was easier. Look, I've already got a police mandated shrink. And I think you know plenty about me now. I don't know anything about you."

"You don't need to know anything about me except that I'm going to blow your fucking mind." Sara directed Jane to a sitting position on the bed and then straddled Jane's lap. Clasping her hands behind Jane's neck, Sara pressed her lips against Jane's. Jane kissed her back without hesitation and then felt Sara pushing her tongue into Jane's mouth. Jane put her hands on Sara's waist and then her fingers found their way under Sara's sweater and they kissed like that for awhile.

Sara stood up and methodically removed each article of clothing until she was naked and resumed her position on Jane's lap. Jane tentatively traced her fingers over the exposed skin on Sara's chest and back.

Sara pulled Jane's top off over her head and then removed her bra. "Lie down." When Jane did, Sara noticed the scar on Jane's right side and gently traced her fingers around it. "It's so small. Are you healed?"

"Enough."

Sara finished undressing Jane and then knelt on the floor at the foot of the bed. Jane watched as Sara buried her face between her legs and for the first time Jane understood what an intensely erotic sight that could be. Jane wanted to put her hands in Sara's hair but instead grabbed onto the bedspread, twisting it in her hands as her orgasm rolled through her body.

Sara climbed on the bed and hovered over Jane. "Fuck me," Sara said before kissing Jane again. As Jane tasted herself on Sara's lips she stroked through Sara's wetness several times before tentatively pushing two fingers inside Sara. Sara rode Jane's hand and when Jane flicked her thumb over Sara's clit, Sara pushed two fingers inside of Jane too.

After they both came and Jane caught her breath she said, "Fuck, you're good at that."

"I know." Sara rose from the bed. "I'm going to go shower. You're a big girl, you know how to find your way back to your car right?"

Jane sat up in disbelief and watched Sara's naked form leave the room. Then Jane started laughing, hard enough that her side started to hurt.

As she drove home, Jane idly wondered why she had waited so long to do that and if it could really be that easy.