Blue

Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Jane Rizzoli and Maura Isles do not belong to me. No infringement intended and no profit will be made from their use.

A/N: Despite my note for Chapter 1, if all episodes were as fun and ridiculously gay as "Rebel Without a Pause" I would never complain again.

Jane sat in Lt. Cavanaugh's office drumming her fingers against her knee. She didn't have medical clearance to return to duty yet, but Cavanaugh had called Jane to ask her to come in and meet with him.

"Hey Rizzoli," Cavanaugh said as he entered his office and sat behind his desk. "How are you feeling?"

"Pretty good actually," Jane answered honestly.

"Good. I wanted to discuss something with you. There's been some discussion about giving you a special assignment and I wanted to run it by you. Basically the idea is you would have two roles, one would be to work on higher profile or difficult homicides. The other would be working cold cases."

"Is this some sort of punishment?" Jane asked.

"No, it's not punishment. If I were you I would think of it as more like a promotion. You wouldn't have to deal with anymore domestic dispute murders or stupid drive-bys. And you would have a chance to do some real good. I think you already know that for a long time our Homicide Department was mediocre at best. There are a lot of unsolved cases that deserve a second look."

"What's going to happen to Frost?"

"He's been working with Korsak since you've been gone and things have been going well. They can remain together."

Jane thought for a minute. "It still feels like a punishment."

"Look, Rizzoli, there's no point in hiding anything from you. There are certain people in this building would be happy to see you turn in your badge. There are people who think you are a danger to yourself and others. There are also some people who think you're out of control or have a death wish or something."

"And you?" Jane asked.

"I want you to be around for as long as possible. I'm offering you a pretty good deal. You will have total control over your work on the cold cases. And you can start as soon as you want. You don't need medical clearance to start going through old files."

Jane had been staring at the floor, but her head popped up at that. "Really?"

"Sure. I'll find you an office too."

"I'll give it a try, as long as I'm allowed to change my mind."

"Okay. You can start as soon as you want to."

"Hello Detective Korsak," Maura said as he entered her lab.

"It's Sergeant now actually. You've done a nice job renovating down here."

"Congratulations Sergeant. Is there something I can help you with?"

"Jane is upstairs with Lt. Cavanaugh talking about her return to work. He's going to make her an offer to work mostly on cold cases and occasionally help out with difficult murders."

Maura flinched slightly upon hearing Jane's name. "Oh. Well that sounds interesting."

Korsak sighed. "I don't really want to get involved in anyone's personal business but I've noticed that you haven't quite been yourself and I think I may have some experience with what you're going through. You know I care about Jane like a daughter. And you know I saved her when Hoyt had her, you know the first time. If I hadn't found her she would probably be dead. She's gotten over it now, but at first Jane hated me for that. She hated me because I saw her hurt and in her mind weak."

Maura felt the tears forming in her eyes, but they didn't fall. "I don't think she's had that problem with me. When Hoyt came after her again she came to me, she was scared."

"You realize it was you who saved Jane, Frankie, and yourself from Marino, turning on the walkie."

"That was really just luck."

"Well, it's just something to think about. There could be a lot of forensic questions in those cold case files so you should be prepared for that. I don't know what's going on with Jane now, but I'm she'll get back to normal eventually." Korsak turned to leave.

"Wait, Vince. Thank you." Maura sighed, "Do you think she'll ever stop doing stupid dangerous things?"

"Probably not. It's who she is."

"Is that why she's being put on cold cases?" Maura asked.

"What do you think?" Korsak left before Maura had a chance to answer him.

Jane was restless. She had agreed to go into work the next morning and take a look at what the old files looked like. She was nervous about going into work again and what other people were going to think about her new assignment, which Jane knew was punishment despite what Cavanaugh said.

She took out her phone and quickly typed a message: "I don't know what the protocol is for this so I just want to say I had a good time so thanks."

Her phone buzzed almost immediately: "You aren't upset with me are you?"

Jane typed back: "Hell no. You were just what I needed"

"Wanna come over?"

"You don't have some sort of one time only rule?"

"I can make an exception."

There was a pounding on Jane's door. She opened it and Angela barged in, saying "I've tried to stay out of this but I can't any longer. What did you do to Maura?"

Jane closed the door and turned around to face her mother who was looking at her with hands on her hips. "Nice to see you too. I didn't do anything. Wait, what's wrong with Maura?"

"I don't really know. But she's quiet, withdrawn. She doesn't seem to go anywhere but work."

"Then why aren't you taking care of her?" Jane yelled.

"Me? What about you?" Angela yelled back.

"You take care of people. I just hurt people."

Quieter, Angela said, "That's what I came here to find out. What did you to hurt her?"

Jane sighed. "I shot myself, Ma. I put her in danger. I put Frankie in danger. And then I shot myself and she watched me do it. I'm just trying to leave her alone to protect her. I just want to protect everyone."

"What kind of friends turn their backs on each other after something like that?" Angela was yelling again.

Jane yelled back, "Goddammit, Ma. Fucked up, emotionally retarded friends, who are in love with each other."

Angela's mouth dropped open. "You're in love with her?"

"Yes, of course I am."

"And Maura is in love with you?"

Jane clenched her jaw and ground out, "I don't know. Sometimes I thought maybe, but I don't know."

"You didn't tell her?"

"Of course not, and I'm glad I didn't. She's better off without me in her life."

"She doesn't look like she's doing better without you."

"She'll get over it eventually."

"You're going to have to see her at work. What are you going to do then?"

"I had a meeting this morning. I was offered a new assignment, working mostly cold cases. We should see each other a lot less at work."

"Oh, honey. Why do you have to make things so hard for yourself?"

"Just take care of her, okay? Even when she doesn't want you to. Just do the thing you do with me when you ignore my requests for you to stop smothering me."

Angela's jaw dropped again. "Smothering?"

Jane decided that she'd had more than enough of this conversation and made her way to her door. "I gotta go, Ma. I love you."

"Where are you going?" Angela called after her as Jane left her mother alone in her apartment.

Jane sent another text on her way to the car: "I'm on my way."

Two hours later Jane lay naked in Sara's bed. Sara walked in wearing a sheet wrapped around her otherwise naked body and handed Jane a beer before joining her in bed.

"How come I'm not getting kicked out tonight?" Jane joked.

"I think you're interesting. And I'm curious about something. You were... different tonight. You came over here with such purpose, I was wondering what caused that."

"I told you I already have a shrink."

"You think you can come in here and fuck me like that and not answer a simple question?" Sara laughed.

"Fine. I guess I had an, uh, interesting day. I had a meeting about going back to work that was a little weird and then I had a stressful conversation with my overbearing mother. So I guess I just needed a some rigorous exercise."

"See, that wasn't so hard."

"Yeah, I guess not. Well, I should get going," Jane said, getting out of bed and starting to dress.

"You don't have to."

"I really do. I've agreed to go back to work starting tomorrow, so I should get home."

"Alright Jane, you know how to find me." Sara stood and gave Jane a kiss on the cheek before sauntering off toward the bathroom.