Authors note: Hello faithful readers, and here is another chapter of my story 'The life and times of Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez. But first I would like to thank Dior Crystal, lamekirby, Silvermoon123, PhreshxxxBear, ima-glomp-you, Dante123, Crazykk2, Mistress -freak, tokenoiz for their lovely reviews. I'm gather such an army! Now go my minions and read!
Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, any of Szayel's experiments, Aizen's evilness, Gin's creepiness, Tousen's… annoyingness, Ulquiorra's emotionlessness, Grimmjow's meaness, or Nnoitra's freakiness. I do own Karite and her weirdness, and Kurosu and her green hair… Well it's better then nothing.
Day fifty
Sunday
Dear fucking journal,
Today was interesting to say the least, though I myself didn't enjoy it.
It started out waking up at 4 am to find Ulquiorra on his bed with me curled up against him. I swear I hate my life with a passion, especially when my days start out like this. So after moving cautiously over to my bed I tried to go back to sleep. Unfortunately I wasn't so lucky, so I stayed awake.
Then something odd happened, I found myself watching Ulquiorra as he slept. It's odd to see the usual strong emotionless Arrancar appear so... serene. It was spellbinding and I found myself watching him for like three hours, right until he woke up. Luckily I was able to advert my eyes before he found me watching him, I like to live thank you very much.
But my reaction to him surprised me, I never found anything interesting enough to watch for three hours in a row. Putting that thought out of my head the day continued on. My fraccion was still denying liking Tesla, Stark was still sleep deprived, and Gin was still an asshole. Though he was now a cross dressing asshole. He still wore that hideous outfit, and it is still funny.
Anyway the prankster had hit again, because neither of us can find Barragan's fraccions. Though none of us particularly cared, so we just went about our day like normal. Barragan doesn't even care where his fraccion are, he just sat around like usual today. Not having to put up with that freaky one was enough of a victory for me, I think his name was Charlotte or something. Just looking at him makes me want go blind, that or rip my eyes out.
After that I took Karite to get her IV today and Tousen lost another dreadlock. I swear before she's done with him he's going to be bald. There was also quite a gathering of Arrancars to watch, I ended up making them pay me to get in to watch. So I was sixty bucks richer, that was until Karite demanded some of it because they were watching her. That left me at fifty but oh well, it's more then what I had before.
Also it seems as if Gin has become frustrated with his new outfit that he cannot remove. He had actually tried to put a coat and pants on over his outfit, though ever time he did the cloths were mysteriously ripped to shreds. Whoever was doing it was too fast to see, and was Hell bent on making it apparent that they wanted Gin to suffer as well.
Karite had officially named the corner in my room that she pained her "Depression corner". Though why she put it in my room I have no clue, can't she go be depressed in her own room? Though being handcuffed to Ulquiorra at least I don't have to stay in my room with her, I swear she's psycho. Well more then an Arrancar should be or rather could be.
Next annoyance that decided to heap itself on my head was during training, Ulquiorra had suggested sparring with our fraccion more often. Something about challenging them past their normal limits to help build strength, personally I just think he wants to see me miserable.
And I got tripped today again! And I know now it wasn't Gin, he couldn't trip me while standing 5 feet in front of me trying to rip off his unfortunate outfit. So now the question is, who could it be? It hurt a lot, especially when Ulquiorra decided to land on me again.
You have no idea how heavy he is, I didn't know either until he landed on my back... twice now. He doesn't look like he weighs much but trust me he's no feather. After asking why he didn't just land on the ground like me he said that he didn't want to come in contact with the trashy ground. I then retorted that he calls me trash, he then just said I was the lesser of the two evils.
So I went to bed today with another hurt back, thankfully Arrancars heal fast.
Day fifty one
Monday
Dear fucking journal,
I'm really starting to think that sleeping on the floor is much more preferable to sleeping on my bed. Especially when I wake up to see Ulquiorra sleeping on my chest, with his arms wrapped around me. Even worse was my tail was wrapped around him as well, much to my dismay
So now I have officially established that Ulquiorra is too a snuggler, and that I'm really getting good at moving him in his sleep. Thankfully I moved him back to his bed without waking him up, though it was a close call. He started to stir halfway through the process but thankfully I manage to coax him back asleep. How I did this however is forever to remain secret, I don't even want to write about it.
So after moving him over I then found myself watching him... again. I swear it's a fucking compulsion, Ulquiorra must be using some kind of mind game on me. Why would he do that? I have no clue, though since when did mind games ever make any sense? Especially when they come from Ulquiorra, I think that's what he does in his free time, come up with ways to fuck with everyone's minds.
So after Ulquiorra woke up I swiftly pushed those thoughts from my mind and continued on the day like normal. Well as normal as being an Espada and being tethered to Ulquiorra could be.
Also someone is messing with me! After being tripped two days in a row I thought that it couldn't get worse, I was very very wrong. Evidently someone likes to kick my chair out from under me, ever time I tried to sit down today I fell on the floor. It happened like 5 times, and having Ulquiorra looking down at me and calling me trash wasn't helping in the least.
The others aren't helping either, they just keep laughing. It wouldn't be so bad if I knew who it was, I could just beat on them. But I don't so that threw a wrench into my plans for revenge, and no one even saw who it was. Whoever was doing it is fast, faster then me.
Karite got her IV, Tousen got a new scratch on his face, and I got eighty bucks today. A productive day if I do say so. I only had to give Karite ten dollars for her part in it, leaving me with seventy. Oh well it's better then yesterday, if it keeps up like this I'm going to be rich.
Next we found out who the prankster hit next, Tesla really has had a rough week. First my fraccion ruining his life and then having the prankster targeting him? He has had it bad, though I particularly didn't care.
His blond hair was now dyed a bright bubblegum pink, matching the pink clothing made possible via my fraccion. Tesla had actually blamed her first for his hair, but she denied it vigorously. Evidently she hadn't gotten near him in four days, making torturing him impossible. So we then deduced it was the prankster, because come on who else would do shit like this?
So after that we went training, our fraccion were improving believe it or not. Karite almost touched me today, though only because I let Ulquiorra distract me. He had called me trash, which pissed me off, which then gave my fraccion the opening she was looking for. Thankfully I was able to bend backwards and avoid the hit, though I did bend my back almost past its elasticity. I might have cat like reflexes but my spines not rubber, so it's still slightly sore.
So to bed I go, while hopefully trying to stay in my own bed. And hopefully Ulquiorra would stay in his own.
Day fifty two
Tuesday
Dear fucking journal,
I'm getting so tired of waking up to find myself in contact with Ulquiorra, even worse when I find myself watching him not long after. It's developed into a habit I can't stop, it must be because it's not everyday you see the usual stonic Ulquiorra so calm, he almost looked nice. It's like a rush, to see him like this and he doesn't have a clue.
Anyway after waking up Ulquiorra ordered that it was shower day, again. I hate showers so much! So after the water torture exercise we headed to breakfast. And lo and behold someone kicked my chair out from under me again. I hate my life, more then you could fucking imagine.
So after being laughed at for almost an hour I took my fraccion to get her IV. Evidently the prankster hit him, because Tousen kept complaining about a loud beeping noise that no one else could hear. Whoever the prankster is, that was a nifty prank, he's hearing things and we think he's crazy. A two for one in my book.
So my fraccion got her IV and Tousen got away today, I'm actually placing wagers on who's going to come out the victor. I made ninety dollars from admission fees and then got another sixty from bets. I knew Tousen would get away, he's kind of twitchy from the sound neither of us could hear. Though Karite was angry that I didn't bet on her, I gave her, her share and she shut up pretty quickly.
We also managed to find Barragan's fraccion, much to our misfortune. They were all locked in an impenetrable large glass box in the basement, thankfully, or not depending on how you look at it, it had air holes. They looked as though they've been fighting, and the one named Charlotte was beaten to a bloody pulp. I actually laughed at that one.
Tousen was then ordered by Aizen to give them food as well after giving my fraccion her IV, what was he? The caretaker of the Espada's and their fraccion? I'm surprised he was chosen, he hates us Espada more then anyone I've ever met.
So we left all of Barragan's fraccion there, lets be frank, neither of us cared. So the day continued on like usual, much to my displeasure. The norm for me lately is being humiliated and knocked around, hey at least I'm getting used to it. Before no time I won't even care that I'm being laughed at all day.
Next Stark fell asleep on the table, and he was shocked pretty badly. Though he just continued to sleep until we were sure he was going to die. So Harribel woke him up, thankfully she did it before he was killed. Aizen would be mad if his highest ranking Espada was killed by something so stupid. Though Stark now has a twitch, that happens every time someone even says anything related to sleep.
Next I was knocked down by the damn spoon, which made Ulquiorra fall as well. Though he fell in a dignified fashion, right on my back again. It turned out that pink freak was chasing him, and he was mad. What happened? I have no clue, and I particularly don't care.
So next we went to training and I got to fire a cero at my fraccion. Hey we were sparring so it was fair play, though she didn't think so when it nearly burned her arm off. She then went about cursing me out, which her sister had to translate for me. Evidently I almost burned her right arm, the one she draws and paints with. Though I didn't really care, and I told her this. She just cursed me some more, though I couldn't understand her.
So to bed I go in hopes that when I wake up I won't be anywhere near Ulquiorra, or him near me.
Day fifty three
Wednesday
Dear fucking journal,
Today was so wrong on so many levels!
It started out waking up to see Ulquiorra laying on me, worse he was awake and staring at me. So I growled at him, he merely shrugged and got up. After that I had to gather what dignity I had left, because after waking up like that I don't have that much.
So after that we proceeded to breakfast to encounter something my eyes are still screaming at me for looking at. It was that bitch Menoly, and the prankster got a hold of her. Her outfit was now a horribly ugly pukey brownish green, it was hideous. So what did I do? I laughed of course, it was just too funny.
So she glared at me, in which I just glared back. When she went past I tripped her, it was funny because she fell right into my fraccion. And then Menoly had the audacity to yell at my fraccion for it, lets just say female fights are much more brutal then any fights men get into.
It was odd however because Ulquiorra was glaring slightly at Menoly, though if you weren't paying attention you wouldn't have noticed. I then let it go, like I care about what Menoly did to tick off Ulquiorra.
It was funny because my fraccion beat the shit out of her, in which I congratulated her. I mean it isn't everyday you get to kick the shit out of someone that serves under Aizen and gets away with it. Menoly was the one who started it after all, and no one died. So no problem.
Next Karite got her IV, and Tousen got caught. I won the bet today as well, because I bet on my fraccion. She was still pissed after the Menoly incident, I knew that she was going to take that excess rage out on Tousen. And I was right, she managed to knee him in the groin. So my income today was a hundred dollars in admissions, and eighty on wager winnings. If it keeps up like this I'm going to be rich.
Next interesting thing to happen was during dinner, when Tousen got up abruptly and grabbed his head. Evidently the beeping noise in his ear had gotten too much for him to handle. After grabbing his head he shouted and then took off towards his room, pretty funny stuff if you ask me.
Even Aizen found it mildly homorus, he stared after his shinigami lackey with a slightly interesting look. Evidently that wasn't normal behavior for the black shinigami, personally I could care less. Though at least I wouldn't have to put up with him for now, and that was a good thing in my book.
But how could my day be ruined in a matter of minutes? I got tripped again, and Ulquiorra landed on me… again. I swear he does that just to bug me, because I know he could land in a crouch instead of on me. But does he? No, he has to torture me as much as possible.
So I'm off to bed, with hopes that tomorrow won't be as bad as today.
Day fifty four
Thursday
Dear fucking journal,
Today was better then yesterday, though not by much.
I woke up to see Ulquiorra in his own bed, with me cuddled up to him. I quickly moved to my own bed again, going as far as the handcuffs would allow. I then found myself watching him again, I swear I really need to break this habit. It's weird to know I'm watching someone in their sleep, even more because I'm starting to enjoy it.
So after Ulquiorra woke up, without him knowing I watched him of course, we headed off. We got breakfast and stared in shock at what we found when we got there. Loly, the other half of the terrible duo, got pranked as well. Her hair was the most hideous thing I've ever seen. It was gelled and spiked, and looked like a rainbow on steroids. It looked horrible.
So I laughed at her, hard. She glared at me and I tripped her like I did to Menoly yesterday, and it was even more epic then the first time. She ran straight into Ulquiorra, who fired a cero at her. Evidently she had done something lately to tick him off, he glared at her like he did Menoly yesterday.
Luckily, well for her, she managed to dodge at the last second. And after she did that she fled, as fast as physically possible. Evidently Ulquiorra terrified her to death, I knew most of the lower Arrancars didn't like to cross Ulquiorra but I didn't know it was that bad.
Next I had to go fetch Karite to get her IV, evidently she has been spending all of her time in her 'Depression corner' in my room. I just sighed before dragging her to Tousen, who has been suffering from the sound neither of us could hear. So my fraccion caught him, though she went easy on him today. She only cut his shades in half, though it was a close call. Her dagger almost sliced his face in half.
After that I counted up my income for the day, ninety five dollars with admission and I lost forty on the wagers. I thought that Tousen would get away today, but oh well I still made a pretty penny.
So after my fraccion got her IV she went back to my room, to take up residence in her 'depression corner'. Which just happened to be in my room, I swear she's going to drive me insane. I told her she could stay until I got separated from Ulquiorra, after that she would have to stay away from my room.
She smiled, well I think she did. I really couldn't tell with the duct tape, and then wrote out that she would leave as soon as I'm free of my current burden. Who knew I could be nice? Evidently not Ulquiorra, he stared at me strangely... all fucking day. It got unnerving after the first hour. And it only got worse from there.
It was almost like he was trying to figure out some great mystery about me, well good luck to that. Because what you see is what you get when it pertains to me. Meaning he isn't going to figure out shit, and I told him that... repeatedly. Though it didn't discourage him.
So I went to bed with the feeling that Ulquiorra did figure something out about me, and it was unsettling. Especially because I couldn't figure out what he learned.
Day fifty five
Friday
Dear fucking journal,
Today has to be the worst day of my life! Not only did I have a rude awakening, but we found out who the prankster it, and my fraccion can speak again! It fucking sucks.
It started out waking up to a blast of reiatsu from Aizen, signifying a meeting. Unfortunately I jumped awake, not knowing that Ulquiorra was on my chest. So when he woke up at the same time as me, and I jumped up and our lips met! I fucking kissed Ulquiorra Sciffer! That was NOT what I needed this morning! Thankfully though Ulquiorra didn't get to kill me because we had a meeting to attend to. Lucky me.
So after my morning I thought it couldn't get worse, unfortunately it does. It turns out that the prankster who screwed my life and everyone else's was Aizen. Yes that bastard had fooled with us all and we couldn't do anything about it because he was 'God', meaning I couldn't beat the shit out of him. He also pranked himself to make himself look less guilty, Menoly and Loly praised him on his brilliant plan.
So he then proceeded to rip the tape off my fraccion's mouth, which made her curse a long stream of curse words. Next he took the electrifying devise off Stark who immediately fell asleep where he stood. Harribel's cloths were returned to her and Szayel had his room turned back upright.
The fork's collars got fixed, meaning he was the spoon again. Oh fucking joy. Barragan was given a solution to wash the dye out of his hair and mustache as well as Loly. Barragan's fraccion were released, and Aaroneiro was given the solution to get rid of the mood dye. Menoly got her clothing fixed and Tesla had his hair back to it's normal color.
Gin was released from the horrifying outfit, which made him strip right in front of us. He could have at least waited until he got to his room, sheesh didn't need to see that! Next Tousen got a small devise removed from his ear, so he had been hearing something we couldn't. Kurosu refused the dye remover, saying she liked her hair it's emerald green color.
Zammari's eyeliner had dissolved by now, and Yammy had his muzzle removed. In which he headed straight for the kitchen, no doubts about his objectives. Harribel's three fraccion got a solvent that dissolved the super glue and they were freed, though they still fought like cats and dogs. Which wasn't all that surprising.
So that just left me and Ulquiorra, he unlocked us and I felt like running around with my arms in the air. Though I stopped myself, no need to embarrass myself anymore. My elation didn't last long however, it turns out that Aizen didn't have the antidote for my cat ears and tail. Evidently it didn't have a cure yet, I fucking almost attacked him for that. So now I'm stuck with them until Pinky decided to make an antidote. Yet again... oh fucking joy!
So after the meeting I headed outside, my fraccion following me. It turns out that the 2 weeks worth of words she withheld all came out at once, she talked nonstop all fucking day! I almost killed her, though I staved off the urge. I don't want to give Aizen an opportunity to reprimanded me.
And I got tripped multiple times today, though at least I didn't have Ulquiorra crashing on my spine. Though I did avoid him most of the day, no telling what he's going to do to me after I kissed him this morning. Though I fucking didn't mean too he probably thought I did.
So going to bed in my own room is amazing, no Ulquiorra, and no waking to find him on me! I can't wait, because after today I deserve a little rest.
Day fifty six
Saturday
Dear fucking journal,
I awoke to a picture on my ceiling, and for the first time I smiled at it. You don't know how much you miss the trivial stuff until something more worse comes along. So seeing a picture of Aizen being decapitated by my fraccion as she rips tape off of his mouth made me feel good this morning.
After getting up and seeing my fraccion painting a picture of Aizen dying by hanging I smiled at her. I think I freaked her out more then I first figured, she panicked while running for cover. After telling her to get out from under my bed I ordered to repaint my room white. She went about that wearily, still watching me cautiously. I just shrugged and left her too it, going towards the kitchen.
After grabbing breakfast I made my way outside, glad to finally be free of my handcuffs. That was until I was stealth petted, making me stumble. So my stealth petter was back, but not even that could lower my mood so I went on whistling. I think I scared a few of the fraccion because they refused to come near me. Well better for me, I didn't have to put up with them today so it was a win for me.
Though my day started to get worse from that point on, and it started when Aizen called us to a meeting again. It turns out he wants us to grow closer as an organization so he ordered that starting tomorrow we were going to have a 'movie night' every night. Each of us got to choose a movie a night and then we all had to watch it, no matter what it was.
I sighed, I had a feeling that this wasn't going to end well. But since when did any of Aizen's ideas end well for me? Never. So I don't think I'm going to enjoy this 'movie night' at all.
As we left the meeting I got tripped again, right in front of everyone, and they all laughed at me. Aizen even laughed at me, asking why I was so clumsy today Even worse was that no one saw who done it, though I don't think they'd tell me even if they did see who it was.
Next during training my fraccion talked the entire time, evidently seeing me in my usual angry mood raised her own spirits. She wasn't afraid that I was an imposter anymore so she went about her day. Ulquiorra stared at me today, his expression unreadable. But when has his expression ever been anything but unreadable? Never, that's when. I still don't know where I sit with him after that kiss, though it wasn't intentional. If it wasn't intentional does it make it a kiss? Or would it just be a contact of lips? That's something to think on.
After training I got stealth petted again, and I jumped, again. I hate it! Why couldn't Szayel just find a way to get rid of these cat ears and tail?! I swear he's not even working on it! So now I'm back to my pissy mood and I think everyone likes me better this way, because no one wants me to be happy… ever!
So I woke up in a good mood and went to bed in a bad mood, this place is a total mood killer I tell you.
End