Title: It's All Your Fault
Author: Trance-Faith
Rating: M – suicide and suicidal tendencies.
Pairing: Callie/Arizona
Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's. All characters in this story sadly do not belong to me; they're simply being borrowed for a little while, and then will be returned. This story was not written for profit and no copyright infringements are intended. Also the song words used in this fanfic are Paramore's "emergency" and Pink's "It's all your fault".
Author's Note 1: In terms of Grey's storyline – this is set after their break up, in 7x07.
Author's Note 2: so ... yeah computer got a virus (some malaware thing) after I'd written about 2/3s of this chapter – wiped the file clean. Sorry it's taken me so long to update! In reality this chapter is filler and ended up longer than it was meant to, but since it's mainly fluff filler, so I suspect most won't complain.
Beta: No beta was used while I wrote this, so all spelling and grammar mistakes are my own.
Reviews: Are much wanted please!
"I'm trying to figure out what else to say, to make you turn around and come back this way" - It's all your fault by P!nk.
Callie's POV
Arizona's eyes widened in shock. "Don't go!" the raven shouted, her voice sounding foreign even to her own ears. The older woman gave her an apologetic look before grabbing the blanket from the bottom of the bed, turning on her heel and left the room, her heels drumming her walk on the wooden floor.
Their plans had been ruined. Okay not ruined…altered. They were meant to spend a few hours at Alex's and Izzie's reception, enough time to speak to everyone who was left (as the bride and groom went back to the hospital very shortly after the wedding). Then go back to Callie's apartment, order a pizza, watch a DVD and see where the night led. Upon entering the apartment they had ordered their pizza. Then Callie had been in the middle of going through her DVD collection so Arizona could pick, when the blonde had knelt behind where Callie was sat on the floor, and wrapped her arms around the Latina's waist, gently kissing her neck. Callie instantly became putty in her hands…literally. Moving her head to the side, she allowed Arizona more room to continue her assault on the tan skin, and Callie to groan in pleasure. Both women's hair, which had been left down for the grand occasion of the day, cascaded down the other woman's shoulder.
There was a slight thud as the few DVDs Callie had picked out fell from her hands, as the taller woman raised her arms to weave her fingers through the blonde hair pulling her into a frenzied kiss. While she was at an extremely awkward and slightly painful angle the reward was worth it. That said Callie couldn't help but move. Turning slowly, never breaking contact with the soft lips attached to her own, Callie managed to turn completely, so both women were kneeling on the floor. The younger surgeon could feel this kiss going places they'd never been before. The inferno was getting hotter and hotter by the second, both women gripping the other, forcefully pulling them impossibly closer. Out of nowhere she heard her voice mumble something about a DVD, and received a chuckle in return from the blonde. Arizona pulled away, Callie realising both women were panting slightly. Looking straight into the usual sky blue eyes, she saw they were several shades darker. "Do you really want to stop and watch a DVD?" Arizona asked her voice a good few octaves lower than normal. Unable to reply, Callie simply shook her head in response. The blonde smiled back at her. It wasn't the dimple smile she was used to. It was slightly mischievous and the sparkle in the darken blue eyes, made Callie realise she was in trouble…of the best kind.
Arizona stood slowly, ensuring that her cleavage danced tantalising close to the brunette's eye level. The blond lowered her hand gesturing that Callie was to take it. Without breaking eye contact Callie took the offered hand, which helped her to her feet. Once standing the taller woman pressed into the smaller frame, kissing the lips which she was being presented with. One of them, Callie wasn't sure which let go of the other's hand, as both women wove their fingers deep into the hair of their soon to be lover. This night was going to be their night. The kisses were fast, hot, messy and uncoordinated, as they tried to take as much as the other was offering, while ensuring they got the minimum amount of oxygen they needed to remain conscious. Callie could feel Arizona starting to walk backwards uncertainly towards her bedroom. The raven couldn't help but smile into the kiss, and helped navigate her in the right direction, without breaking away.
Once clear of the living room, Arizona managed to step away long enough to shed the off the shoulder blue dress, by tugging on a small zip on the side of the dress. As the dress slipped off the blonde's body, Callie's breath caught in her throat as she was greeted with the sight of light creamy flesh. Arizona was now stood before her, in a strap-less light blue bra and underwear to match. Callie's eye rose to the blonde's face to see a smug smile gracing her lips. She had been caught staring, and couldn't help but blush in response. The PEDs surgeon moved forward, capturing the Latina's lips again, chuckling slightly, "You are adorable when you blush, Calliope Torres" she purred. Never had someone simply saying her name done such things to her insides, before it fell from Arizona Robbins' lips. One of Callie's hands intertwined deeply into her straightened golden locks, while the other came to rest on the now naked waist. Both women moaned at the contact, even further still when Arizona's bra clad breasts were pulled into Callie's frame. Arizona's hands made their way beneath Callie's top and the brunette couldn't suppress a moan as the blonde's fingertip ghosted their way across her abdomen and then her breast. Even with the softest she was being touched with, through the fabric of her bra, Callie could feel every movement Arizona made, causing a feeling of pure arousal to pool in the pit of her stomach.
Hastily Callie tried to rip her black top from her own top half, only to have it catch on her earring. Searing pain shot through her right ear, "Ow ow ow ow" she cried out. Her hands kept trying to get her head out of the top, as the threads of the top kept tight a hold of the hanging earring. She felt a firm hand on one of her arms, stilling her movements, before an equally firm voice spoke "Callie, hold still". She could feel Arizona moving, and touching her in various places, before the pressure on her ear was released, and top was removed completely, allowing the blonde's face to come into view. The blue eyes looked worried, but upon seeing Callie was okay, Arizona broke out in a huge smile. "You okay?" she said in a low voice as if a louder one would injury her ear further. Callie raised her hand to gently rub her sore ear lobe "Yeah, just sore, and embarrassed". Arizona gave her a slight smile before moving forward and placing a small kiss on the small lobe. The tall woman gave a short chuckle turned groan as the blonde's tongue circled her earlobe, soothing the pain. It was then Arizona pushed herself into Callie, breast on breast, Callie let out a silent gasp, thankful for the first time all night that she'd chosen to wear flats, while Arizona had worn high heels. Arizona used these shoes to her advantage as she leaned back slightly she turned causing Callie to move with her. Keeping up with momentum the blonde's body pushed into Callie's pushing her backwards towards the bed. Both ungracefully fell backwards onto the bed, both laughed slightly as Arizona landed on top of the taller woman, not that Callie minded. She could get used to this. Looking up into the bluest eyes she ever seen, she could see forever. She knew it was way too soon to think it, never mind say it, but she was in love.
It seemed by the look on Arizona's face, she took her momentarily lapse as hesitation, this impression was confirmed when the blonde leaned forward, brushing the fly away pieces of hair from the Latina's face, before saying in a soft and understanding manner, "We can wait". She was under no illusion, she was nervous about this, she wanted it to be perfect…to be perfect. She knew Arizona felt bad about her comment out Callie being a "newborn", but a part of her still wanted to prove her wrong. "No" sounded the raven's voice. Arizona's face dropped slightly in disappointment, before Callie could continue, "I don't want to wait. I want you now". Before Callie could respond the blonde had recaptured her lips, drinking them in deeper and deeper. It was an odd but invigorating difference in sensations between the roughnesses of their bra clad breasts, and the silky softness of Arizona's bare flesh against hers. Her skirt was becoming a hindrance as her hips move slightly of their own accord. It seemed the item had offended the other woman too as she pulled away, tugging on the small zip which ran from her waist to mid thigh. Once the zip was down, Arizona lifted herself off Callie a few inches, effectively pushing her cleavage into Callie's face once again. Arizona yanked rather hard on the black skirt before Callie realised she was trying to remove it. The Latina wiggled slightly enabling the offending item to be pulled down and shed from her legs. She also toed her shoes off, causing them to clunk as they hit the floor. The blonde moved forward and lowered herself back down, so she was sitting on Callie's stomach with her high heel shoed feet rest on the mattress beside the Latina, making her groan rather loudly as she felt the heat radiating through the small baby blue underwear. Arizona gave her a devilish smile, as she hands slipped around her own back, and undid the small clasp on the matching bra, causing the object to fall slightly, before it was removed completely.
Callie's eyes traced every detail, every curve, every freckle from the blue high heeled feet, the long legs, the taut abdomen, the soft shoulders and arms, the sooth neck, and beautiful face. When brown eyes met blue there was no embarrassment or blushing, no shame, only lust, passion and desire. The blonde bent down, crushing her own lips into Callie's. This enabled Callie to muffle Arizona groan as her core had slid against Callie's stomach, as she squirmed her lower half downwards, so straddled one of Callie legs, one leg resting in between Callie's thighs. Their kisses were rushed, soppy and passionate as both fought for dominance and oxygen, both seemingly trying to stop the other from breathing. Heavy breathing, groans and moans filled the air as Arizona's hands and lips began to wander, causing the blonde's breasts to also trail along the tanned flesh. As the smaller woman's knee rose to meet Callie's centre, the younger surgeon's hips lifted to seek more contact. It felt as if Arizona was everywhere. Callie could feel her heart racing, beating out an irregular beat on her ribcage, and her whole body was turning to goo beneath Arizona ministration. Arizona was rolling her own hips, causing the knee between her legs to rock into her core. Callie's eyes rolled shut, just as a knock from the front door resounded throughout the whole apartment.
Callie's eyes opened in a flash, to see Arizona had rose gently and was looking at her in shock and confusion. It came to Arizona a lot quicker than Callie who was interrupting them, "pizza" she said with a small smile. Climbing off the longer woman, Callie made to grab her arm but missed. "Arizona", Callie begged. "I'll be right back, I promise", Arizona placed a small kiss on the swollen lips of her…lover. Despite Callie begging her not to leave, she had, wrapping herself in the blanket Callie had had since she was teenager.
A few minutes later, after Callie had managed to recover enough to sit up, she wiggled underneath the duvet, as Arizona had walked back balancing the large pizza box in one hand, while the other cling to the fold of the blanket wrapped around her. Dropping down on the bed, she let Callie's blanket fall from her shoulders as slipped underneath the bottom of the duvet, causing the orange blanket to pool at her waist. The pizza box was dumped on the bed in between them. Callie felt the blonde's long legs entwine themselves against hers, and couldn't help but smile. "Took your time. Was worried you'd ran off with the pizza delivery boy" Callie grinned, and then grinned even further at the look of disgust on Arizona's face. "Hmmmm spotty teenage boy…. luscious Latina lover", Arizona said moving her hands in a weighing fashion. "I wonder" Arizona smiled back, and Callie knew she blushed again. She didn't understand it. She was used to compliments about her body. There were times when they were the only ones she got. She used to be confident in herself, self described "bad-ass". Where was that woman now? A slight movement from Arizona's side of the bed shook her from her wonderings. She saw the blonde examining the multicoloured but mainly orange blanket she had used to wrap herself up in. "Can we use this if we ever have a picnic or something?" she asked. Yep, Callie's bad-ass days were over, especially if she was going to be having picnics. "Erm… it's quite old", had been her reply, and she instantly regretted it however she had seen the disappointed look on Arizona's face. "I was going to say I would look after it, and wash it afterwards. But I get what you mean if it's important", Arizona gave a smile back which didn't exactly reach her eyes. "No, we can use it. I just meant we have to be careful with it. I've had it since my late teens", the brunette explained, as the other woman played with edge which had landed in front of her. "Of course I'll take care of it Callie", Arizona shot a beautiful and breathe taking smile right at her, only for her.
Several months had passed since their first night together. George had died while Izzie had survived. Callie had not been given a promotion, left Seattle Grace, only to return shortly after. Carlos Torres had come with a priest, to perform some sort of a gay exorcism. Though something she had said it seemed must have sunken in, because hours later her father had accepted her and Arizona's relationship. Callie had promised her father a big wedding and children with the blonde woman who had stolen her heart, and yet they hadn't even said they loved each other yet. Callie had come to terms with the fact she was in love with the perky surgeon, and believed maybe the other woman would feel the same for her one day.
Callie had left Arizona sleeping that morning. The raven haired woman couldn't describe how amazing it felt, walking up a long side the woman she loved. Knowing she was going to be last and first thing she saw everyday. The younger woman had left her key on the side, so Arizona could come and go as she pleased on her day off. The text she had received about thirty minutes before her shift ended told her to meet Arizona by the park bench they had adopted as their own when Callie no longer worked in the hospital, which then had become the place they had had several picnics since the day Arizona had suggested it. When Callie had left the hospital it was dark, but thankfully blissfully warm and in the time it took for her to walk the distance to their bench revealed glistening stars in the night's sky. It was rare to have such a lovely night in the usually rainy Seattle.
Upon reaching their clearing the Latina couldn't help but smile as her lover came into view. She was half laid, half sitting facing away from her looking across Seattle and the needle. Her golden hair was cascade down her back, but in slight curls. She was beautiful. Callie took her place on her own blanket next to the small blonde. As soon she was sat down, Arizona rested her head on her shoulder. "I've missed you", sounded the small voice. A smile threatened to take over the taller surgeon's face, as she turned her head and kissed the blonde head, "missed you too". Arizona entwined her fingers with Callie's. "I didn't get any food, thought it might spoil", Arizona spoke in a slightly apologetic tone. The raven couldn't help but give a faint laugh "its fine". The blonde started to play absent-mindedly with the back of Callie's hand. "Timmy and I used to star-gaze in our garden, well gardens. It was one of the things we did at every new home, make wishes" breathed the small blonde. One thing Callie had come to realise that Arizona didn't talk about her brother, part of her wanted to know more, but she wouldn't push her too far. "What did you wish for?" Callie urged. Arizona burst out laughing, "That changed over the years. A pony, birthday parties, girls, whatever we wanted at the time. Once we reached fifteen I wanted a stable home, to stop moving around, Tim wanted to walk our father's footsteps. The last time we did it was about a week before he left on his last tour…" Callie hadn't realised how much she had been hanging on very word, until no more came.
There were several moments of silence, which were oddly comfortable, both women lost in their own thoughts. Then Arizona moved from Callie's embrace, wiggling her way down so she was laid flat. The blue eyes looked directly at her, expectantly. She then realised she was meant to lie down too. Making a fake sigh of annoyance Callie flopped backwards, and like Arizona wiggled her way downwards so her head came to rest on the blanket beneath them. It smelt of the blonde. Callie recognised the smell of Arizona's washing powder, it smelt so similar to her. The brunette allows a grin capture her lips, turning her head she saw Arizona smiling back at her. "What would you wish for Calliope?" the blonde asked. Instantly the Latina thought, "Nothing. I have you". Instead what came out was a half strangled sigh, before she turned so she could look into the night's sky, "I don't know".
Africa. She had said she would go. It was a decision she had made quickly, however it wasn't one she had made lightly. Standing in the middle of the airport, Arizona had never looked more beautiful. Her hair long, down and curled, her eyes slightly red and puffy. She had never looked as beautiful as when she was walking away. "Please. Please, I can…we can do this. We figure this out" every few words that Callie spoke were punctuated by emotion, as she begged Arizona not to go or to go but with Callie at her side. With a small shake of her head, Arizona simply replied, "You stay here and be happy and I'll go there and be happy". While tears danced in the sapphire coloured eyes, her voice remained steady.
She'd be damned if she would let Arizona leave thinking she would be happy without her. "If you get on that plane, if you go without me, we are done, do you hear me? We are over," Callie warned, mentally pleading, hoping Arizona would stay. If Arizona needed it, she, Calliope Torres, would go down on her hands and knees in the middle of the airport and beg her love to stay. She would do, or say anything to keep the woman she loved. She didn't know how to survive without the woman in front of her. Arizona gave her a sad smile, before speaking, her voice finally thick with emotion, ""We are standing in the middle of an airport screaming at each other. We're already over". Callie had no eyes for anyone else. Until that point she had quite forgotten that there were other people, nameless faces blurring passed them, and all she could see was the blonde woman in grey turning and walking away from her.
"ARI. ARIZONA!" the Latina shouted after her, the tears spilling uncontrollably down her face. She had to do something, had to anything. Rushing forward, she continued to shout for her girlfriend, hoping, expecting a blur of grey to come back around the corner at any moment. "ARIZONA" she shouted pleading with the woman she could not see, and may never see again.
Opening her eyes she couldn't help but smile faintly as there stood Arizona. She had come back. She was stood leaning slightly on the white wall behind her, her eyes were racking over Callie, but without even trying to gain eye contact. The older woman looked so broken. Confusion hit the brunette where was she? Then it hit her. Arizona hadn't come back. Not when she cried and screamed her name. Not when the security guard had come to see if Callie was okay. Not when she had cried herself into a migraine in the back of a taxi to the Archfield. Not when she had … The sapphire eyes rose slightly to meet her own, and even with the room's length between them she heard the blonde gasp slightly in surprise. Out of nowhere, without even thinking the thought, Callie's vulnerable voice breathed, "Don't go".