A/N: At this point I'm just not going to apologize for the wait. This story is incredibly hard to write for because I really don't like it all that much, but if you do, then great for you (that wasn't sarcasm)! If you want more, check out the one-shots have written and tell me what you think.

Also I just wanted to make sure people know that I do like Kurt a lot. I think he is amazing. Mercedes is okay. This season she is a bit psycho in my opinion. Well, read and review, or alert, or favorite, or whatever.

If I had owned Glee, we wouldn't be waiting to see Damian this long, Cameron would be on the show, as would Emily, and we would not be witnessing Rachel and Finn's first ANYTHING.

Noah POV

I guess stalking the girls wasn't the best idea ever. Satan has just seen us and she looks pissed, with a capital P. Hey, I know that voice. Santana's gaze leaves me and turns to none other than the laughing faces of Mercedes and Kurt.

Shit, double shit, shit on a stick, and any other way shit can be prepared. Those bitches are going to ruin Rachel's day, and that just won't do. Locking gazes with Santan, I nudge Mike and Matt towards a few girls checking them out.

Santana POV

They are going down. "Hey Brit, why don't you show Rach that new store they just added, I think it's called Forever 21. The clothes there are hot, but more Rachel's type."

"Sure! But, you know, I think it's only for 21 year olds. Wait, we can't go in there then. Oh no! Santi, do you have those fake ids on you?"

I stared at Brittany for a few seconds before nodding and digging into my purse for the ids. Rachel just stood there with a raised eyebrow staring a Brittany dumbfounded and then turning to look at me with a judgmental glare. I shrugged and pushed them in the direction of the store.

I felt a quick tap on my shoulder. I turned around swiftly (if I have to say shut up one more time about my vocabulary, I won't hesitate to flip a lid, so to speak), expecting Puck, only to run into a smirking Kurt. Sighing I raise my eyebrow just as Rachel did, but I did it in question, well a bitchy question.

"Hello Santana, we just wanted to get your input. Who do you think is more of a bitch, you or Rachel? We have been discussing it for days and haven't come to a conclusion."

"Well I'd have to say me, but you know I'm just a tad bit biased. Maybe you could ask one of your other lame friends, oh I forgot- you don't have any. Look, all I have to say to you is stay away from Rachel and Britt. If you have any problem with that, then you can talk to Puckerman here. "Or, maybe Schue would like to have a word with you. Whatever, just as long as I'm there to see you get your asses kicked, got it? Ugh, I have to get out of here. Your porcelain face is making me queasy."

Mercedes had her head down and Kurt looked like he may have shit his pants, serves them right. "We're not afraid of you, but I suppose we can find away to not run into Rachel…." I glared at him quickly "or Brittany." He corrected himself hastily.

Finally I smirked happily and nodded. "Perfect, well I'll see you around, or maybe, I won't. I'd choose the latter." I waved with a sarcastic smile as Puck followed with one last glare.

"Well that went well." Puck said. I grinned.

"I think so."

Meanwhile

Nobody's POV

"Brittany, it is my belief that you aren't leading us in the correct direction." Rachel said in a careful tone.

"Rachel, I thought you said it wasn't polite to talk about Grilled Cheesus and religion anymore." Brittany replied in a hush whisper as if she was talking about a conspiracy.

Rachel just looked at her in complete confusion. She finally settled on saying "Brittany, the store is that way."

"Oh, okay." The bubbly blonde replied as she grabbed Rachel's hand and skipped off in the direction Rachel had pointed. When they finally reached the store, Rachel happily began to look around. Santana was right, these were more her style than what they had seen.

After fifteen minutes, Rachel was being weighed down by what felted like hundreds of things, but was probably only half that. Dresses, shorts, skirts, pants, etc. was on her back. Just as Brittany and Rachel strolled up to the dressing rooms, Santana came up behind them. "Hey bitches."

"Hello Santana, where have you been? We've been very successful in the search for clothes that I find appealing and that do not make me look like a grandmother, or a five year old." Rachel responded.

"I've been around. I needed to talk to some people, get some stuff figured out. We'll see about your clothes. I have the final judgment Berry, know that." Just then they reached the head of the line waiting for the rooms.

"I'm sorry Miss, but we can only allow six items to go in at a time, and you can't take anyone in the room with you." The sales clerk said.

"Maria, is that you? My friends and I were just looking to spend lots of dough in a place that would accept it. Hey, did you get that pregnancy scare issue taken care of? Did you ever even tell Jake?" Santana replied in a sickeningly sweet tone.

"Uh….um, well never mind. You can all go in. Take your time. I hope you find something." Maria said as Santana smirked and shoved Rachel towards the biggest dressing room.

Santana had been right. They found an entire new wardrobe at Forever 21 and moved on to other stores finding little else. They did however find a black leather jacket that clung to Rachel in all the right places.

After lunch Brittany asked her soon to be girlfriend, "Sani, can we go to the secret place?" Santana was quick to agree. Seeing Brittany in new lingerie sounded like a great way to spend an afternoon.

"Sure Brit Brit. We need to get Rach some stuff for the Puckerone anyway." Rachel blushed, but decided not to argue.

In Victoria's Secret

Rachel's POV

I peeked out of the dressing room and looked around. Santana and Brit were no where in site. I ducked back into the dressing room and waited to here their voices. Finally Santana's distinctive husky laugh could be heard.

I stuck my head out of the dressing room again and found Santana following Brittany towards the dressing room I was occupying. Santana was grinning and carrying Brittany's stuff as Brittany spotted me.

"Hey Rach, I have stuff to try on too. San and I are coming in okay? Did you try on the red lace night shirt and panty set I picked out?" Brittany finished quickly as she was talking a mile a minute.

"Yes Brit. I was waiting to show you and Santana." I ushered them into the dressing room quickly and stared at them expectantly. Santana was smirking expectantly and Brittany was clapping and jumping up and down.

"It's perfect. When,"

"If," I interjected.

"When you and Puckerman get together, he will be ecstatic!" Santana continued. Britt nodded along with Santana's words seriously.

When Brittany finished her shopping, we headed home. Will, Mike, and Matt all looked surprised to see the amount of bags in my hands. Emma and Puckerman just shrugged when Will and the boys looked at them in confusion.

"They're girls." Noah said before catching sight of the Victoria's Secret bag and grinning wolfishly. I blushed and quickly tried to hide my smile. Santana chuckled and Will started talking about dinner.