Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters of Gundam Seed or Gundam Seed Destiny. Some other character names are just randomly thought of and have no relevance to real life.

xxx

Doubts and Awakening..

xxx

"What did you say?" Athrun cannot believe his ears. The officer came in and informs him of updates about the captive youths. This development is something that they had expected but not this soon.. "there are still three weeks away from the summit..we have to minimize the incidents and attacks.."

"Ah.. Admiral.." the man tried to catch his attention, he turned to him.

"What is it..?"

"There was a message from Engr. Erica of Morgoenrete, she asked you to come see her. It seems to be related to the envoy from the Kingdom of Scandinavia who was wounded during the melee." The officer said. Athrun was shocked upon learning that Victoria was wounded but he was more curious about Erica – san's business with him. In the past days, she had been asking sorts of things from Kira. Like his blood and tissue samples which confused Kira so much but nevertheless, the polite Coordinator acquiesced.

"I understand.." He nodded. "Commander Harada, please tell Colonel Tosaka to conduct a thorough investigation on our internal waters and tightened the security around the island's shoreline. Advice the hangar to put the Murasames on stand – by position, we cannot allow any more intruder to enter our territory." He ordered and the man just saluted in response before he went out of the room.

He checked on his desk first to see if there are any pending cases he had to attend to, when he decided that there is none, he immediately made his way out of the building and drove off towards the Morgoenrete facility which is just right beside the medic bay. As soon as the people saw him, they saluted in respect which he exchanged with a nod and went straight to Erica's office. After knocking on the door, he heard her say "come in", and saw her working something on her computer when he entered.

"Ah.. Athrun – kun.. What a good timing.. I'm glad you came.. I was actually waiting for you. Want tea?" She said and offers a cup of tea to him which he gratefully accepted.

"Thank you.. I actually learned from Commander Harada that you wanted to see me. What is it about?" he inquired.

"Ah.. nothing much.. it's about the investigation that we had on the Siberian territory. We had them confirmed, there are currently four Gundam type mobile suits being manufactured in that facility.. though we thought that it had been abandoned after the previous war. What I am worried about is that they have a frighteningly strong fire powers that can easily destroy a city.." She showed to him some photos showing the location.

"And we can't even demand an explanation from their government.. We aren't allied to anyone, so, they won't even bother to listen." He tried to enlarge the photos to take a good look on some parts of it. "And now, the envoy that was sent to us had been involved on this matter for the second time.."

"You mean Victoria Stuart right..? Isn't she quite a very interesting person?" Erica went back to the computer and saved some of the files.

"Ah.. Interesting indeed to the point of being painful.. She just unreasonably look like Cagalli, and there are things about her that's similar to Cagalli too.." he sits on the sofa and waited for the woman to finish her work.

"Don't you think of any possibility that they could actually be sisters..?" Erica did not even bother to look at him when she throws the question. Athrun was surprised at first but then thought deeply.

"You mean triplets..? Aren't Kira and Cagalli the only survivors in that experiment..?" he remembered the story of how did Cagalli and Kira came to be.

"Who knows.. Their father was quite a very unpredictable scientist.. but anyway.. I am still interested with her.." after finishing saving everything.. Erica finally looks his way. "Shall we go and visit her together..?" he nodded and followed her towards the medic bay. Athrun took his time walking, in the past days.. he had been dreading about the possibility that they might encounter. He has nothing against her, it's just that she would always remind him of Cagalli.. He took a deep breath as Erica opened the door and when her twin Emery welcomed them.

"How is she..?" he asked while following the two women.

"My.. What a healthy woman she is.. She got at least two noticeable wounds but she's still insisting to be released as soon as possible.." Emery opened the door towards a room and saw Victoria, with bandage on the head, arm, and leg. He saw that she was surprised upon seeing them.

"Admira Zala.. Emery – san.. Erica – san.. thanks for coming here, but I am very fine.. If it's alright, I wished to go back now.." she tried to stand – up but Athrun stopped her.

"As I thought, you were taught to say I'm just fine even if you really are hurting, weren't you..? Seeing your wound, I would say.. moving your arm or leg would take quite an effort to do.." he just smiled when she hurl dagger looks at him.

"Oh.. I thank you for being very thoughtful Admiral.. but what am I supposed to do..? Cry and complain that it hurts so much..? wouldn't that be more troublesome..?" he saw her flash a sweet smile before raising a brow.

"Is accepting other people's kindness against your doctrine..? You ought to let other people who wants to care for you, let them take care of you.. you know.." her face shows surprised then defeat, she averted her gaze from him.

"I just don't want to become a burden to other people.. If it's possible, I wish to be the one to care and protect them.. though, it will make Charles sad.." what she said surprised Athrun, she wanted to protect people.. "It's so Cagalli.. giving up every thing just to protect the people."

"So.. is that why you did not bother to wait the support troops, and just made the offensive on those kids..? It's quite admirable though that you did not fatally wound them during your melee and you even protected them.." he can't help but smile remembering what she had done.

"It would actually be better if I will be able to save those children from a destructive future.. Just as I was saved.. No matter how twisted it may sound.. but, they also seemed to be trying to protect other people though.. and since I have been soaked in this, I would like to ask for your permission to let me be able to fight when the time comes.." she looked to him directly that Athrun had to muster his will just to counter her.

"What do mean by fight –" he tried to catch what she said and saw her taking a deep breath.

"Your country is actually shouting for help already, isn't it..? You will be under attack sooner or later.. and yet you are still doing your very best to keep them at bay.." she gave a knowing look that he slowly nod in agreement.

"So.. you knew.." it was more like confirming.

"It's impossible for me not to when I had been involved with it twice.. Before, I may have said that my life is cheap.. then decided that I would prefer to sit back and watch how the world will unfold.. however.. those kids made me realize something better than my own selfish motives.. I just can't sit by here and watch a peaceful country burn to destruction, can I..?" she thoughtfully said that Athrun had to look sideways.. "She's just painfully too similar.." Good thing that Emery interrupted.

"Oh my.. What a thoughtful offer.. but as of now, I can't let my patient do as she please, can I..? You haven't answered all my questions to you regarding your headache that made Tosaka – san very worried since you fainted because of it.." Emery pushed her back to bed.

xxx

"I'm just fine.. These scratches won't affect me at all.." Victoria inspected her wounds, they are bearable.. The only reason that she fainted earlier was because of the incredible headache.

"You're offering your help, but aren't you a part of your government..? You may say that you aren't a soldier, but it doesn't change the fact that you aren't even a part of this country..We don't want to drag your country into this mess either.." the man commented which ended her into thinking deep.

"Indeed.. I am not even a part of your government.. but as of now.. I am not going to fight just for the sake of war.. This is to save people.. This isn't something that I have to ask approval my home country.. This is my own decision.. besides, it's not like I will be sticking with you all the way.. I'll stop once I'll be able to ensure your people's safety. Moreover, when that time comes.. I'll be recalled already back to my country, making my commission coming to an end.." she had thought about that possibility before, but she had already decided.. No one can stop her, even if it is Charles.

"You are strong Victoria – san.. I once knew of someone who has the same passion as you when it comes to protecting people.. I can still remember when that child said that she'd rather have her body burn along with her country than being safe at the sidelines doing nothing.." Erica's words brought sudden pain into her heart.

"What a great girl she must have been.. But, I don't intend to become a hero Erica – san.. because most of the heroes died, I have no intention of dying just yet.. If I can become a helping hand to alleviate your situation, I wouldn't mind lending it for free." The surprise on their faces and their gasps confused her.. then she saw the admiral clench his fist before excusing himself out of the room followed by Erica.

When they were alone, she asked Emery if she had said something wrong to which the doctor just sadly shake her head as if to say "no".

"Just that it can't be helped that whenever we see you.. we are always reminded of that someone who was important to us.. She just died really young.." the doctor sat on the opposite bed.

"You mean the princess..?" she mustered her will to confront her. "I know that I unbelievably look exactly like her, but similarity should end with my appearance right..?"

"That's why it hurts them more, especially to those two.. I can still remember, when that child was younger.. she would always make her way here in the facility and would ask any military personnel around to teach her, be it holding a gun, or piloting an aircraft. Even with the reprimands that she always get from Uzumi – sama.. the next day, we will still find her around here. Do you know what she would always say..?" Emery's smile was sad. "I want to become strong to be able to protect our people.. I want to make sure that they will remain happy citizens of this country.."

"And whenever she says that, Uzumi – sama would always be defeated.. That is why this country never had the luxury of having a sweet princess.. People did not see her as one, rather a very charismatic and loving young Representative.. She wasn't meant to be raised for battle, but that child found her way to the battlefield in the most fateful way.. But everything is under the bridge now, just like that child who never had the chance to decently weep for her father's loss, and was forced to look forward.. We also have learned to put back things in the past.. However, just sometimes.. no matter how you bury, the memories always creep in.."

As if the words of the doctor are hypnotizing her, Victoria found herself seeing again flashes of what seemed like a shuttle taking off and followed by a space port facility exploding in front of her.. the flashes are becoming clearer, then she realized that she had seen that familiar place. "The space port facility of Kaguya.." her heart began to beat faster as seeing the flashes brought a very heavy feeling in her heart, that she did notice herself crying. It's as if she had lost someone very dear to her. Then her head started to ache, but it isn't as painful now.

"Emery – san.. May I ask you to give me my pill..? My head is aching again.. I – I need it.." she saw Emery stands up and gave her the bottle and while swallowing the pill, she noticed just how intent was the doctor's look on her. "What is it Emery – san?"

"Neh.. Victoria – san.. I would like to ask you something and will you please answer me honestly..?" she gave the doctor a confused look before she nods.

"I am just curious as a doctor, just what is exactly happening to you when you will have your headache attacks? and what could have brought these?" she took a deep breath before answering the woman.

"To be honest, these occurrences started after I woke up from my coma.. There are some flashes of unknown events that will come to my mind and whenever I try to think deeper on them, the headache will start.. This could have been a side effect of the brain therapy sessions I had, before coming back to earth.. The explanation given to me was that, those memory gave me trauma and so they have to remove those traumatic memories out and retain only those which are bearable and useful.." she answered thoughtfully that she did not see how the doctor gasped lightly and shake her head.

xxx

Athrun sat on a chair as he tried to calm down his ranging feeling.. "Just till what extent must she have to be like her..? why must she have to be like her..? Why am I so affected by her presence..?" he combed his hair using his hand, then he noticed that his hands are actually trembling. He was extremely shaken by her words, it's as if he could hear Cagalli's last words as told by Kisaka – san. His hand made its way towards his necklace and pulls it out, and as usual, holding it always makes him feel comfortable. "It had protected me and kept me alive.. but you whom I intended to protect my life with is no longer here. If it's fate or coincidence, I don't know.. but I'll just make sure that she won't have to die too. I cannot afford seeing your image die in front of me.. yet again.." he rested his head on the chair's headrest and did not bother Erica who went to the fridge to get a glass of water. It must have been more than ten minutes since they went out of the room when Emery followed them, he immediately rose from his seat.

"Can I speak with her?" and the doctor just smiled as he walk past her. He saw the woman covering her eyes with her arm. He cleared his throat to catch her attention when he hears her say.

"I applaud your strong will to still be able to talk civilly with me.. Looking at my face must have brought millions of needles in your heart right..? After all, seeing my face will just taunt you of having lose your lover forever.. am I right..?" she suddenly remove her arms and looked directly at him, the shock her words brought him rendered him speechless. His reaction might have been transparent as he saw her smile sadly.

"Ah.. Uhmm... That is – " he can't decide where to begin.

"It's alright.. I just guessed it and happened to guess it right.."

"You.. you certainly looked exactly like her.. I should know that should have put that in mind, but, you just felt so achingly familiar.. that whenever I see you.. it's as if I am seeing her. I can't really say that she was still my lover, not after I left for space.. She had removed this from her hand telling me that she had to prioritize her country over me.." He twirls the necklace around his forefinger gently, exposing the Haumea stone and the engagement ring on it.. His flying thoughts prevented him to see how her eyes went wide in surprise upon seeing the ring.

"You.. you always give me the awkward feeling I feel whenever I'm near her.. It's not that I am feeling insecure.. Just that Cagalli would always make me feel nervous about her actions and decisions.. I am always afraid of losing her.. she, who had taught me to value my life more had always worked her life away for the sake of other people. She had said before that she wouldn't let me or her brother die.. indeed, Kira and I are still alive until now.. she had kept her promise.. in the most painful way.."

"Ath – run.." he looked her way. The way she called his name is just painfully the same. "Should I start calling you that Admiral..? I don't want to become another woman's substitute but if you want, I can become your friend. Just a condition though, you should see me for who I am.." she extended her hand to his, he took it with hesitation.

"Ahh.. I'll do my best.." he answered honestly.

"Oh well.. your answer is good enough.. I'll become your comrade though, until your war is over.." she then covered his hand with her other hand. Her hand felt so warm and familiar, they're being kind to his torn soul. While being held by her, he can't help but remember again her words. "I won't let you die.. also that guy who could be my little brother.."

He just smiled painfully and silently uttered. "Cagalli.."

xxx

Erica followed her twin to her laboratory and looked at the monitors surrounding it. A week ago, after that incident at the hangar, she had asked a favour from Emery to help her in this case as it is her specialty. At first, Emery wouldn't want to believe but upon seeing the woman, she finally agreed to her request.

"So.. how is it?" she tried understanding what could the readings tell but she just isn't as knowledgeable in this field.

"I can say that her brain is working just fine.. The brainwaves shows a normal flow most of the time and would only drastically change whenever she had her headaches.. to which they dramatically increase.." she explained the movement of the waves on the monitor.

"I have thought earlier that she might have had a repressed memory, but that suspicion was confirmed when she told me that she indeed had undergone series of brain interference therapy to selectively do away some unwanted memory which could have brought extreme trauma to her. This method made me doubtful, it's just too much to do for someone who could have been cured by mere therapy or counselling sessions. Why must her brain be interfered and why must her head hurts so much whenever she has those unfamiliar flashes..?" Emery opened up the screen which showed some photos of the brain.

"I am thinking that she has two sets of memories inculcated in her brain.. One is dominating over the other.." Erica gasped as this theory is totally unheard of.

"What do you mean by that Emery..?"

"It is very complicated.. it is possible that the woman's memories might have been repressed either by amnesia or some other reasons, then a memory from another person had been put on to the working cognitive part of her brain. It should be a near to impossible to do that because the human brain should not be capable of being read easily. Which also put doubt on my suspicion.. her memories are all real, from when she was young till that time that she almost died. She can even remember how her consciousness worked during her comatose. The only thing that kept me with this almost impossible theory is her answer to my question earlier.." Emery contemplated for a moment.

"What is..?" she asked impatiently.

"She said that there are flashes of some unknown events which come up to her mind and that whenever she tried to think deeply about it, her head will start to ache. I am thinking that those flashes might have tried to destabilize her currently established consciousness. If that is the case, then it only meant that the doctor who had administered her is frighteningly exceptional.. to be able to do that flawlessly."

"Then Emery.. what are you trying to say..?"

"What I am saying is.. unless she's a clone.. she might actually be the one whom we thought she is, at least physically.." Erica gasped at her twin's revelation.

xxx

The middle aged doctor watched intently at the girl inside the cryo capsule, she just can't believe her very strong will to live.. By normal human's parlance, she should have been long dead.. sustaining that kind of devastating injuries from a very powerful high beam cannon. "But then, this young lady and that other one who woke up earlier than her had survived.. Even when they had almost succumbed to death, they still crawl back from the deepest pits. Don't worry young lady.. I'll make sure to make you come back..no matter what.." the doctor thought as she watched the girls consciousness being flashed in the brain reading device. Since she had been in that situation for five years, she somehow felt a great bond towards the young woman who at first she just thought of as a mere subject of experiment.

The first time she saw both young ladies, she was very surprised.. To see a very popular figure whom everyone thought had died a week earlier is actually sleeping before her very eyes. As she looked at the man who hired her services, he just said. "The two of them should have been dead, both by body and soul.. But the strong want from their consciousness to live made me make this decision. They still want to live even after experiencing so much pain.. so I.. I will do everything to make that come true, I will certainly lead the two of them a much better tomorrow when they wake up.. afterall, I owe them my life.. For the better or for the worse, they are the very reason why am I still here.." The man's word seemed to be confirmed by the consciousness of the two women as the machines flashed the words of the ladies' consciousness, one of them saying.

"I have to live.. I have to protect the people..They need me..my country.. Kira.. Athrun..they must be worried about me.." that consciousness belonged to the woman with shorter blonde, while the other is more desperate.

"I have to live.. I can't die yet! I don't want to die this way.. Not this way! I can't let Charles live a lonely life.. I can't!" The activities of their deep consciousness belied their pitiful figures.. both are bandaged and some parts of their bodies are heavily injured, the other girl surprised her that she had to cover her mouth from shock, some parts of her body are missing. As much as she wanted to back out from this project, her abilities were also challenge.. "Is this what war brought among the soldiers..? These young women will surely lead us to a brighter future.. They, who had understand the deep sorrow that war brings.."

"I understand.. Then.. this shall become a highly protected secret project. Please don't let anyone disturb me and my team.. we will be counting years before we can put them back to good shape.. It's no longer about the payment, I'll make a path for a discovery that man is yet to realize." The man just bowed at her in gratitude.

"I thank you for your kind indulgence on my selfishness Doctor.." She thought that it would take years before the two ladies will wake up but to her surprise, the other who sustained lesser injuries, woke up in a matter of two months.

When they analyzed on the possibilities, they realized that the girl had been among those who were modified at inception and was injected back to a natural womb for a normal delivery. "Is this a part of the SEED factor..? Humans who are more advance than the normal.. her wounds are even healing at a faster rate that all we have to do is to have her undergo a general surgery to erase the wounds and the scars that covered her body.." After that, they had her undergo several sessions to help her get a new life and go back to the society. They also took samples of her DNA and combine it with the embryonic stem cell that they had acquired to see if her DNA factor will speed up the recovery process of the now lone sleeping beauty. After how many years of fruitless attempts, they had finally made a way to have the woman's body accept the foreign sample, and her damaged parts had already started to reconstruct at a surprisingly fast rate. "At this rate.. she should wake up any moment.. After long years of sleeping, you should be able to finally wake up, young lady.."

Just as she was about to leave the room, a movement was detected by one of the monitors. She hurriedly walked back to the cryo capsule and saw that the young lady's lids are moving, until she had finally opened up her eyes. The happiness she had felt is unbelievable, they had finally brought her back to life.. After years of painful struggles to reverse her seemingly desperate state back then, they had made her wake up.

"I can feel your heart in motion.. deep down in your dark affection..

Life goes on and on we love each other in the sadness and pain..

Life goes on.. burning.. as long as I live.

I want to share this light with you once more someday."

She thought that the song being played on the computer may have been fitting to the woman inside the capsule when she felt tears on her cheeks as she smiled and uttered. "Welcome back young lady.. You finally made it.." The young blonde inside broke a weak smile as if she could hear and understand what she had just said.

xxx

There it is.. Read and let me know what you think about it..:)

Cuteshe – san, thanks for your encouraging words and for sticking with this work of mine.. To everyone, thanks for reading.. ^_^

I dedicate this chap to my RL friends who encourage me to continue the plot even though they cannot relate to anime stuffs..