~ Rose of Decade~{Chp.5} Such a shame
Hizaki P.O.V
I sat there silently after my prince had told me what to do. The only thing i could do was nod my head in agreement, obeying his commands. How could i possible disobey him ever again? He had endagered himself and his race just to rescue me! Slowly i got up; my eyes still avoiding his face, not wishing to show any sign of rude behaviour "Yes master, i understand...Do you wish for me to do anything? I do not wish to disturb you any longer, please forgive me for taking so much time from you"i said softly, yet again my eyes focusing on my masters shoes, bowing my head as i thanked him. I was more nervous as i stood here, then when i was in prison. I hated the fact i was being such a sore spot for my master; Hated the fact how i looked at the moment. A half burned dress, ripped at many sides,dirt from the small i had been stuffed into all over my body and my hair; One complete mess! Then the smell of smoke! It was all just disturbing to me, so surely my prince would be disgusted by my very appearance!
In some point i did not mind that my hair was a complete mess; I was already glad i still had it! I had met a very nice, well mannered and good looking girl in prison. She had such long beautiful hair! I was forced to watch her scream and plea for help as men came to let out their animalistic desires. Such a disgusting and low thing to do, raping someone and then act as if nothing had ever happened. The rape was preformed infront of me, but there was nothing i could do, i was and still am weak, how could i ever help someone other than being a slave?
After that encounter the girl had gone completely quiet; for the rest of the night that is, seeing as the next day she was dragged from her cell, getting her head shaved before moving up and out of the cells. I knew I'd never see her again, though i somehow hoped she will be happier in whatever comes after death.
The gruesome picture of her pleading and screaming was embedded deeply into both my heart and brain, and especially when they shaved her head her look sent a shiver to my spine. Her eyes were empty, total emotionless while her body was bruised and tattered. why did she face the gallows? She was such a nice girl and the only reason for what she did was because she wished to survive!
The worst thing of this whole matter was that i saw it as my responsibility to stop them from harming her but i was paralized in fear. Why do i have a male body? I'm a coward and worthless, not only do i lack courage but i also do not have strength!
I knew i was a failure as a male, thus i pretend to be a female. I still do not understand why it was a 'sin'as the citizens say, all i know is that this was why i had to face my excecution...
That image of something so horrible will haunt me forever; Reminding me how i failed to help her...