Finally! After only God knows how long, I have updated!!!

Sure, it's short and mostly randomness, but it's something.

Enjoy.

"Take cover!" Xanna yelled, diving behind the dining table as a chocolate bomb went off. 'That was a close one…' She panted.

'How did we even-?'

"Man down! Man down!" Makaza shouted from nearby, his "injured" comrade "dying" in his arms. "Don't worry, buddy. Help is on the way." He told him as Xanna started to make her way for the two.

Mokoki; covered in strawberry jelly; coughed. "I don't think I'm gonna make it…"

"Don't talk that way! You're gonna be fine!"

"I'm…so cold…" Mokoki said, coughing again. "Goodbye…"

"No!" Makaza shouted, then turned his head to where Xanna was coming from; she was jumping over chairs and dodging corn that was being thrown at her. From where or who was throwing the corn, no one was sure; but she was dodging it to get to her two perverted friends.

'Seriously! How did this even-?!'

"Whoa!" Xanna said as she tried to stop herself from running; but slid into the fort of vegetables.

Ixxy face palmed herself. 'Idiot.'

"What's wrong with him?" Xanna asked her orc friend; suddenly next to him, and with a banana peel on her head. "One of Fëan's brothers shot him with a strawberry jelly sandwich."

"Strawberry jelly?! What kind of sick man is he?! Nobody eats that stuff!"

'You eat it…'

'I stand by what I said!'

'Why the hell are you yelling?!'

"We gotta get him some grape jelly! Stat!" Xanna continued to shout, shaking Makaza; which was shaking her army helmet. "But where are we gonna get grape jelly?!" Makaza asked, worried for his friend.

"I believe that there is some across the kitchen." Gishezpak said, handing Cosmo another potato for the mash potato gun. "Fire!" Cosmo shouted, firing off the gun; falling backwards and on top of Mittens from doing so.

"The other side of the kitchen?! But that's where the enemy is!" Xanna said, looking across the kitchen and seeing the grape jelly.

"But we have to get it, Xanna!" Makaza said, turning her around and making her look at Mokoki; who was groaning on the cold and sticky kitchen floor. 'Man, I'd hate to see who's gonna have to clean up this mess…'

'And I'd love to see how everyone will be punished for this.'

'Pfft. If anyone is gonna get punished, it'll be Kadgaa.'

'Why him? Everyone is in this stupid fight!'

'Yeah, but he started it.'

'How?'

''Cause of Naraxis.'

'You mean when he crawled on your feet?'

'Yep.'

'Uh-huh…'

'Now if you don't mind…' Xanna was saying, putting an army helmet on the army helmet she was already wearing. 'I have jelly to get.'

Ixxy shook her head and sighed. 'Why am I hated?…'

"Take cover! Again!" Xanna shouted, hiding behind a cabinet door as celery was fired at her. 'Damn, how am I gonna get that jelly when they're firing vegetables at me!'

'You can always just…you know…walk over there and take it. OR all of you can stop being idiots and stop this damn food fight!!!'

'That's so crazy it just might work!' Xanna was actually agreeing with her evil voice; until a carrot shot through the cabinet door. It was just an inch away from her face. 'I don't think they'll give up, though…'

Ixxy shook her head and sighed in frustration. 'I hate all of you.'

"Xanna…"

"Yes, my second in command?" Xanna answered Akazil, watching Fëanáro's twenty something other siblings planning their next move. Menacingly, too.

"One… How did this even start? And two; how will grape jelly help Mokoki?"

"Because grape jelly is way better than strawberry jelly. Thus, it will cure him."

"Cure him of what? It's just a little jelly."

"Deadly jelly, Akky! Deadly jelly!"

"How?…" Akazil asked; ignoring the "Akky". He was still a little annoyed at his mother for calling him that in front of his friend, because now they'll never stop calling him that.

"Apparently you're not understanding me…" Xanna said, looking irritated because her friend wasn't comprehending that this was strawberry jelly. "It's strawberry jelly!"

"So?"

"So?! SO?! It's strawberry jelly, man! How can you not understand that that can kill people! I mean, do I have to draw a picture?!"

"I understand that some people don't like strawberry jelly, but I don't see how that can kill people unless they're highly allergic to it."

"It doesn't matter if you're allergic to it or not! It's strawberry jelly! Enough sa-"

"Fire!" One of Fëanáro's brothers shouted; then some of his other siblings started to fire watermelons.

"Take cover!" Xanna shouted, tackling Akazil to the ground to protect him from the watermelons.

'It's times like these when I wish that I had my own body…'

"Okay, it's safe." Dethiam said; appearing out of nowhere; after slicing all of the watermelons with her daggers. She then; to Akazil's disliking; helped Xanna off of Akazil.

"Thanks." Xanna said, dusting off some of the watermelon chunks that hit her. Then she looked over at the night elves; they were loading up more watermelons.

She turned to her two soldiers; which made her army hat spin around. "Okay, men." She said; and Dethiam didn't even mind it. "We're close to our target." Xanna said, pointing to the grape jelly. "Now… Anyone have a plan?"

Dethiam pulled out a dagger.

"Besides that…"

Dethiam put away the dagger.

"Okay…" Xanna said, looking away and back to all of the night elves; they stopped loading up the watermelons and went back to their little planning circle. 'Hmm… What are they planning?'

'Hopefully, killing you.'

'Since they attacked Mokoki with strawberry jelly, it's possible.'

Xanna started to pace and think about how she would get the grape jelly; ignoring Ixxy's eye twitching. 'I have to think of a way to get that jelly… Mokoki's life is at-!' She was thinking when Akazil went flying into the night elves' territory. '-stake…' She finished her though, then turned around to see a smirking Dethiam.

"What? It was the only other thing I could think of."

"Uh-huh…"

'I'm starting to think that your stupidity is rubbing off on her…' Ixxy cried. 'I'm losing the only woman I'll ever love!'

'She's the only person you'll ever love…'

'That just makes it worse!' Ixxy shouted, then ran off crying; just making Xanna roll her eyes. 'Drama king.'

"The enemy is attacking! The enemy is attacking!" A couple of Fëanáro's younger siblings shouted, running around and covering their heads with their arms. "Get the pudding!" Another sibling shouted.

"Ah! Get off me you perv!" One of the girls shouted. "Sorry. I was thrown…"

"Yeah right!" She shouted, pushing him off. "He tried to rape me!"

"What?! I did not!" Akazil said, trying to get up. "Get him!" One of the brothers shouted, tackling Akazil to the ground with his other brothers. "Aaaaah!!!"

"Ha!" Xanna shouted as the night elves tackled Akazil, grabbing and holding up her prize. "I have the jelly! Pull back, men! Pull back!" She shouted, running off with the grape jelly.

"Wait! Don't just leave me here!" Akazil shouted out to his friend, trying to crawl out from beneath the night elf boys.

"Oh, right…" Xanna said, walking back to grab her friend out from under the several night elf boys; then dragging him away.

"Where do you think you're going?" Came that familiar voice; that one familiar voice that was familiar. Of the familiar kind.

Xanna turned around to look at him. "I am going back to my injured soldier to take care of him. Since one of yours tried to assassinate him."

Fëanáro stepped down from the table he was standing on and walked up to Xanna. "And what if I don't let you leave with it?"

"Then…uh…" Xanna tried to think of something as Fëanáro's siblings started to circle her and Akazil; who was now standing up. 'Shit. I guess I didn't really think this through.'

'You never do!'

"Tell ya what, I'll make you an offer."

"And what would that be?"

"You're friend can leave with the jelly if you stay on our side."

"Hmm… I dunno." Xanna said, thinking about this offer. "Okay, okay. You can leave too."

"…What's the catch?" Xanna asked, giving Fëanáro a blank look; he just smirked. "You give me a kiss."

Xanna shrugged. "Ok-"

"Absolutely not! Xanna would never do such a thing!" Akazil interrupted. He may not have known how this food war started or how strawberry jelly could kill or how any of this made sense, but he knew that he wasn't going to let Xanna kiss Fëanáro.

"And why not?" Fëanáro asked, looking at the orc. "Because…she doesn't want to!"

"I think she is the only one who can say if she wants to or not." Fëanáro told Akazil. "Okay, then just ask her!"

"Alright, I will!" The night elf turned his head. "Xanna, would you like to-?" He was asking the air; then he, his siblings and Akazil looked for her. "Xanna?"

"I got the jelly!" Xanna shouted, holding up the jelly above her head as she ran to the other side of the kitchen; jumping over tables and dodging food and such. 'You know you're all idiots, right?'

'Maaaybeee… Oh, shit! Broccoli!' Xanna thought, dodging the broccoli by jumping over it in slow motion. 'If you wanna get this stupid jelly to that stupid perv, I suggest you don't do it in slow motion…' Ixxy said; not even thinking about questioning how Xanna was able to move in slow motion.

'Hmm… You may have a point there.'

'I guess the whole "I'm the smart side of your brain" doesn't mean anything to you, does it?' Ixxy asked irritably; her arms folded over her chest.

Like always, Xanna ignored her, then went back to being in normal motion and continued to run to the other side of the kitchen. But she tripped when she landed. 'Shit…'

'Idiot…'

The jelly jar flew through the air; in slow motion. Xanna; in slow motion again, much to Ixxy's annoyance; got up and began to run and try and catch it. "Nooo!!!"

'I'm extremely surprised that I haven't killed myself yet…'

"Jelllyyy!!!" Xanna yelled, trying to catch up to the flying jelly jar to catch it and make sure it didn't break and get the jelly everywhere.

'I still don't even see why it's needed.' Ixxy said to herself as Xanna continued to run in slow motion for the jelly. 'It's just a stupid jar of jelly.' And she was still going. 'And I don't even see how all this started!' Still going. 'Agh! I freakin' hate how stupid you are!' And still going. 'I should hit you!' Getting closer to the ground. 'That's it, I'm hitting you.'

Ixxy raised her hand to hit Xanna while she was in slow motion, but she was distracted when Fëanáro's parents came back into the room; along with Sophie and Sonya.

The four looked around the kitchen; it was a huge mess. There was food everywhere; like corn stuck under the table, carrots on the ceiling, some white stuff that was hopefully mayonnaise splattered on parts of the walls, celery, chicken, a couple gnomes; it was just a mess.

"Um…" Xanna said, on the cold and sticky food covered ground; and then the jelly jar finally hit the floor and made a huge purple spot just an inch away from her hands. 'Damnit…'

'Idiot…'

Azlirac kept an emotionless facial expression on; and that worried all of the children because that meant he could have been feeling or thinking anything. Feladora just put on an angry mother hen face as she folded her arms over her chest and gave everyone that awful, awful stare.

Sonya held onto to Sophie because she was afraid about what the two angry night elf parents would do with everyone. They were parents, and they were angry; only God knew what they were thinking about as punishment.

"U-uh, hey…Mom…Dad…" Fëanáro said sheepishly, popping out in front of his parents. "Uh… We all, uh…cooked for you guys…" He said as a lame cover up for the food fight as an egg fell from the ceiling behind him. "Um…" And then he dropped to his knees and begin to beg. "Please don't kill us! Or at least, just kill me! It's my fault! I started it! I'm sorry! Don't punish them, please! They did nothing! I'm sorry! I-"

"I started the food fight!" Xanna said, walking up to the night elves. "So, just punish me." She said, wiping off some jelly and taking off her army helmet. "But please, don't throw out my group. If that happens, just throw me out. Don't let their night of rest get taken away because I started a stupid food fight."

"Xanna, what the hell are you doing?" Fëanáro asked, standing up to whisper to the girl. "Just let me take the blame."

"But it's not your fault. And I'm a Halfling, so they probably expected this."

"But-"

"Just let me take the blame, Fëan."

"N-!" Fëanáro tried to continue his protest until his father spoke. "So…what on Azeroth were you children trying to cook?" He asked, picking up a turkey leg covered in moon berry pie.

'Uh…heart attack ala king?'

"Um, we were trying to make…" Fëanáro was saying, then began to fidget with his fingers as he tried to think of something. "We were trying to make…"

"Cookies! Lots and lots of cookies!" Xanna said, helping out her; at the moment; empty minded friend. And then one of Fëanáro's younger siblings fell off the ceiling; covered in chocolate pudding.

"Uh-huh…" Azlirac said, putting down the three armed mashed potato snowman; then he looked to Fëanáro and Xanna.

"…We're in trouble, aren't we?" Fëanáro asked his father. "Oh, you have no-!" Feladora was about to start a lecture when Azlirac held up a hand to stop her. "No. It's fine."

"Fine?! Azlirac, do you not see this huge mess in our kitchen?!"

"I will clean it up." He said, walking to a closet to get a mop; and finding another three of his children and Cosmo in there. "Uh…hi." Cosmo said, waving; making Mittens smack a paw on her forehead.

Azlirac just looked at all of them for a moment, then finally shook his head. "All of you just go to bed and get some rest."

Like I said; short, random, doesn't make much sense, but it's something. And don't ask how, but this will actually help me get on with the story line.

Also, I'm really sorry for procrastinating for so long. Seriously, I am. And I will try to go back to updating at least once a week.

Hope you guys still have some brain cells left after reading this chapter.

*waves* Til later! \/-( ^.^ )z