Here I am after weeks! I know! I totally forgot to thank my lovely friend edwardrocksmysocks for the last chapter's revision. Thanks love! Of course she also worked on this chapter.

This chapter is named and inspired by the song Say It by Blue October. It rocks and is totally Bella…anyhow here she is.

Ch29/Bella/Say It

Of three things I was absolutely positive about it.

First, Edward had acted like an asshole once.

Second, I've forgiven him.

And finally third, I was so in love with him, it was ridiculous.

I had feared I had become like those stupid girls that stay in an abusive relationship.

Like my mother for instance.

Yes, my mother was a stupid girl. My father abused of her and her child, yet she always stayed. Out of fear or ignorance, but there was no excuse.

Like that stupid girl that loves that asshole that treats her like shit, but she stays. She stays, maybe because she is scared to be alone or because she doesn't know anything else.

I didn't want to be that girl.

Edward had hurt me more than once. Not physically, but somehow the feelings he injured seemed to hurt worse that my Father's fist to my face.

I feared I was too weak and I would always end up forgiving him, because I loved him so.

But I was wrong.

Unlike my mother and that stupid girl, Edward had not killed me inside.

Inside I was vibrant with life. I could feel my love for him, warm in every cell of my body. It kept me alive. I was not dead.

Unlike those men, Edward made up to me not with roses and bullshit words of eternal love, but with actions of honesty and just by being real.

The days that that followed, Edward decided to 'start over' and took me out on dates which he insisted on asking my mother for permission for though she didn't care. He said it was the normal thing to do. I just rolled my eyes, hiding the giddy smile that always threatened to come out and followed along.

He told me everything there was to know about him, except his mother. He still refused to talk about her death.

Alice warned me to back off the subject as it was Edward's breaking point.

So I did.

Besides that, I found out Edward had his first kiss when he was 14 with some girl at a party. He didn't remember her name, a fact that he laughed at. Edward did drugs for the first time when he was 15. He stopped a few months ago, which he didn't have trouble with since he states he wasn't an addict and really only did them once in a blue moon.

Edward lost his virginity at 15 as well. That was a fact that I didn't really want to know, but he insisted in divulging everything so 'I could get to know him.' The truth was that I already knew Edward before all of these confessions and they didn't change the image I had of him and, being the idiot that I was, I had only realized this just now.

It didn't matter what Edward did before me, he was still the boy I loved.

"What are you thinking about?" He asked while we laid on my bed. He hadn't stayed the night in weeks and hadn't asked to but, due to my recent nightmares, I sort of begged him to stay with me.

"How adorable you look in Superman pajamas," I said while pulling at his shirt. It was really just an old ratty t-shirt, but he still looked like a kid. A very cute kid.

"These are not pajamas," he chuckled. "It's my favorite t-shirt and a pair of sweat pants."

"Pajamas," I repeated and before I knew it, I was being tickled to death. After I begged for a pee break, Edward held me while I tried to fall asleep. He beat me to it with his light snores being the only noise in the room. I couldn't bring myself to sleep. I felt like I was letting my defenses down. I made myself vulnerable when I slept.

I would see Him. He would be there, with the devil in his eyes and hate in his heart. I would be there too and I was the one he looked at with so much anger. I was the one who he went after, before I would wake up drenched in sweat.

"Bella, baby wake up. It's just a nightmare." I opened my eyes to find a very concerned Edward staring down at me. I hadn't even realized I had fallen asleep.

"I'm sorry," I gasped while I grabbed my chest through my very damp shirt.

"It's okay baby," he whispered against my forehead after placing a sweet kiss there. "I'm here. I won't let anything happen to you. You're safe." He rocked me in his arms while I tried to calm down. It wasn't hard. I truly felt safe in his arms.

"I was 15," I whispered against his chest.

"When what, love?"

"In my dream, I was 15. He was there and you weren't. He wanted to hit me…he…I hate him. I fucking hate him," I cried grabbing Edward's Superman t-shirt for dear life. I didn't want to, but I cried. I felt so stupid.

"I'm here now. That asshole won't ever hurt you again." We didn't say anything more for a while. I knew it was late and tomorrow would be the big day I moved to the Cullen's house.

When I had told Edward about my move to Port Angeles, he hadn't taken it very well. Though he acted maturely about it, I found Esme Cullen knocking at my door the next day. She offered for me to stay with the Cullens for the rest of the school year that way I wouldn't have to change schools so late. My mother was against it at first, but Esme Cullen has something about her that could convince anybody to do anything.

So, it was decided that instead of moving with my mother I would live with Edward and his family. I actually found the idea exciting. I really did like them and just thinking about spending so much more time with Edward made me squeal like a little girl.

"Bella?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you." Every time he said it, there was so much I wanted to say back that at the end I didn't say much. I held on to his shirt a little tighter.

"And I love you." It doesn't feel like those words are enough.

"So I applied at UCLA…" he whispered. He had been planning endlessly for the past two days to apply at every single college in California.

"That's so cool. Hopefully we'll get to go to Los Angeles."

"Yeah." He went silent for a moment before rubbing my back with his hands. "You don't think I'm some weirdo following you to California, right?" I giggled.

"I do think you're a weirdo, but a cute one, but not because you're following me to California. Besides, you are my boyfriend. Don't some boyfriends do that? Follow their girlfriend…"

"I guess, I just don't wanna to get in your way." I sat up and placed my hands on both sides of his face.

"I need you in my way forever. You help me up when I fall and besides, I need company on the way to wherever it is I'm going." I softly kissed lips, before returning to my favorite spot…his warm chest.

"I fucking love you." He sighed.

"Aw…I fucking love you too." I sighed sarcastically and could feel his smile even though I couldn't see it.

~!

"The red Power Ranger is the best."

"We all know the green one is cooler."

"The red one is cuter."

"Bella, that's a stupid reason to pick him," Jacob sighed as Leah and I giggled.

"It's the only reason. Besides, that show sucks anyway," Leah mumbled.

"Excuse me?" Jacob asked insulted.

"You heard me," Leah mumbled again.

"I want you to know that the Power Rangers are fuckawesome."

"Only the red one."

"Bella, shut up!" Jake shouted while Leah and busted out laughter again. "I'm gonna get us some drinks and while I'm gone, I want you to review your choice Bella and see that the red ranger is a douchebag." I rolled my eyes as he walked away.

Spending the morning with Leah and Jacob wasn't my original plan, but Mom had to work before we could move tonight. She would help me move into the Cullen's and she would then leave to Port Angeles with Phil. Edward had to go into Port Angeles with Dr. Carlisle, so I ended up spending Saturday morning watching The Power Rangers with Jacob and Leah and eating cereal for lunch on his couch.

"Sorry this day couldn't be more exciting," Leah apologized.

"It's okay." I chuckled. "It's not like I expected a party."

"You should. It's like a new life you're starting," she assured me.

"I'm just moving houses."

"No, you're leaving a house full of shitty memories behind."

"I guess you're right." She nodded and took my hands in hers.

"You look tired. You alright?"

"Not really, nightmares…" I whispered, a little ashamed.

"I had nightmares all the time."

"You did? Why?" Leah shook her head and sighed.

"I let it happen." I didn't understand and she understood to proceed. "I know Jake hasn't told you, but I don't exactly have a Disney movie life."

"Makes two of us." She chuckled and nodded.

"Totally. You still have bruises?" I didn't answer and she immediately apologized. "It's okay. I do. But like all bad things, they are fading away." She sadly smiled.

"It's the mental bruises that don't."

"What happened to you, Leah?" I wasn't afraid to ask anymore. The moment she looked at me with those soft brown eyes of hers, I knew she would tell me.

"Last year, I went to a party with Sam. He got wasted like no other. I drove us to my house. He didn't have a place to stay since his mom kicked him out. The fucking loser. He wanted to make out and I didn't. I thought he was going to stop, but of course he didn't give a fuck, pun very intended," Leah laughed bitterly.

"I can't believe…"

"Yeah well, like everyone else. It fucked up my mind pretty bad. I didn't tell anybody after my own friends didn't believe me. I practically drowned in the memory every day for the rest of the year. I had nightmares like no other."

"You should tell someone!" I didn't hold back the anger in my voice. How dare he?

"Bella, it's not gonna take back what he did. Besides, he's going to join the ARMY. Big fucking hero he is." She sighed. "But if you can learn one thing about my fucked up story is don't let him take over. Don't let him win. Fight back. I broke his nose the morning after." She laughed and shook her head. "It doesn't sound like much, but knowing he has breathing issues makes me smile every fucking time."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I should have left him at that party. Even though I broke his nose, I wish I had fought back earlier. Please, don't let it happen to you, Bella. Always fight back. Don't let him win or even get started. Get rid of him. Free your mind and soul."

~!

"I should be at your house in less than 20."

"You better," I sighed into the phone. "I miss you."

"I know, love. This officially has been the longest day of my pathetic life."

"Drama queen."

"King, love, king." I giggled. "Your mom?"

"She is also on her way. You'll probably beat her here."

"Okay, I'll let you finish packing."

"Okay, bye."

"Bye."

I sighed in the empty living room. I closed my eyes trying to fight the memories of the hell that was lived in this house. I didn't dare walk into my mother's room and didn't even care about His room. Not one room in this house was safe.

Don't let him win.

I sighed again and went to my room to finish packing my stuff. All of my art supplies were in one box and all of my drawings in another. Since I really didn't have a lot of clothes or junk my room had been the easiest and I left packing it up for the end.

As I placed the last drawings in my box, I ignored the heavy steps going up the stairs. I had already ignored the car lights outside.

A light knock on my opened door made my heart stop.

I could feel it.

The fear in my chest, coming back as an old friend.

I could smell him.

I wanted to vomit.

"Sweetie, I'm home," his soft tone of voice made me gasp and my hands tremble. "Daddy is home." I turned to face him. He had lost a lot of weight. The black circles under his eyes made him look older. He had forgotten about shaving.

I thought he had forgotten about us.

About me…

"So your mother lost the house? That fucking bitch," he sighed.

I froze.

He took a step toward me and I took two steps back. My back hit the wall. I don't know where I went. My heart was racing as he looked at me with that smirk of victory on his face. I felt the push to runaway, caring less about what he could think.

I don't recall how long I stood there, staring at him with him staring at me, but suddenly my feet rushed me out of my room.

My legs tried to get me away and to safety, but my mind kept hearing the heavy footsteps behind me. I jumped two stairs at a time. I think I had forgotten to breathe. I was about to reach the door that led to freedom, but he suddenly grabbed me by the hair and shoved me against a wall.

"You're not going anywhere!" He spat in my face. My vision was blurred by the tears I didn't know I shed. I gasped for air as he shoved his forearm against my throat.

All I kept thinking about was Edward.

I wanted to see him one last time. I hated that this would be my end. I didn't even tell him how much I loved him the last time I spoke to him.

I didn't dare look at him in the eyes. I stared at his shoulder as I struggled against him. I suddenly felt the sting of his hand on my face. I fell on my right arm, while he leaned into me.

"Did you honestly think you could get rid of me?" I didn't really but I also didn't understand his hate for me. I was supposed to be his daughter. I was supposed to be what he protected and loved the most. Instead, I was what he enjoyed destroying the most. I cried as he slapped me again.

How could this be?

A few moments ago I was happy. I was going to start my life with Edward and now I was facing my end. I cried, not because of the pain. I cried in pity for myself. I could feel my mind slipping away. I didn't hear or see what caused him to jump back.

The next few moments flashed by. I saw Edward hovering over my father, throwing fists at him.

"Come on asshole! Fight me like a man." My head ached.

"Bella, baby you alright?" Edward was now kneeling in front of me. I didn't respond. I couldn't. I reached out to Edward with a shaky hand, but he was suddenly pulled away from me.

He was going to kill him!

Don't let him win. Leah's words ran through my head. How could I fight back? Edward's groans of pain pulled me back to reality. My eyes tried to find a way out and my lungs tried to find some air. My eyes finally came to an object under the sofa.

I realized I was still lying on the ground. I dragged myself toward the sofa. I reached for the object and when I finally held it in my hands, I somehow pulled myself to my feet and started walking toward the man responsible for my life and also for my death.

A baseball bat? We never owned a bat, but here I was holding it like I saw those baseball players hold it on TV, except, my target was my own father who at the moment dared to lay his disgusting hands on the love of my life.

The bat vibrated in my hands as it came in contact with the side of Father's head. The loud yelp pierced my ears, but fueled my anger.

"What the hell?" He yelled in pain, holding his now bleeding ear. I didn't realize it until the vibrations ran up my arms, that I had hit Father on his right shoulder.

"You know," I gasped as he rolled around the floor, screaming in pain. "I hate you." I swung again. I couldn't bring myself to feel pity for him as he held onto his arm, crying in pain.

"Stop, it fucking hurts!" I heard myself laugh bitterly. It wasn't me. I had no control over it.

"Stop? Are you fucking kidding me? I won't. I refuse to stop. I won't stop until to you say it! Say it!" I swung again. His throaty screams angered me even more. How dare he cry in pain! How fucking dare he! Memories of my childhood life ran through my head. It was his fault! All of it! "You always told me I was stupid. That I was a retard. It was one of the sweetest things you ever said about me. But I want to let you know, I will never ever let you fuck my life again." I swung again. "Say it! Say you're a retard! Say it!" I swung again. He pleaded. He begged for me to stop, but I didn't hear him. I didn't hear what I wanted him to say, so I swung again. I was about to swing one more time when a pair of hands grabbed the bat from my hands.

"Stop it, love," he whispered in my ear. "You're not him. He won't hurt you again. It was self defense, Bella, but you don't need him dead for him to see you've won." I let the bat slip from my hands and sobbed into Edward's chest as he wrapped me into his arms. I ignored that his t-shirt was blood stained. I ignored the sirens in the back. I ignored my crying mother as she stared at me in panic. I ignored that he no longer begged for mercy.

For the first time, I welcomed in the darkness.

I wanted to rest and I knew I would. It wasn't difficult anymore.

It was over.

Again the song that inspired the last bit is Say It by Blue October.

Thank you so much for reading guys. We are closer to the end. Hopefully I will update soon again. I've started on my new story. So if you guys wanna check it out when it's ready and when I finally post it, save me to your author alerts.

Until next time and please let me know what you think about Bella taking sweet vengeance. Bet you didn't see that coming? Or did you forget about Edward's bat?