In my entire lifetime, nothing has been more difficult than standing my ground as Bella sobs my name. I don't take my eyes off Aro as Felix stifles her cries, swearing to myself that when the time is right, I will tear both of them limb from limb. And then a terrible realization crawls over my skin. Aro will know this. Aro will touch me, and will know every vengeful thought. I'm not safe anywhere any more, not even my own mind.
The heavy wooden doors swing closed behind Felix, and Aro turns back to look at me. There is a long silence, all the more startling after the Bella's agonizing pleas. Not one of the Guard move a muscle, waiting to see what will happen next.
"We'll get you settled in after the meal," Aro finally announces. His tone barely masks his delight, as if I am a long awaited guest, an old friend come to join them for dinner. As if my soul has not just been bargained away in front of them all.
"I won't be partaking, for obvious reasons. I'll hunt, and join you after. I assume there are wild animals outside the city limits?" My voice sounds exhausted; my sarcasm falls flat.
Aro pauses, a cautious expression crossing his face as he appraises me.
I sigh. "You know I won't leave, Aro. You would have Bella back here before I had time to even think about it. I'll keep my word; you keep yours."
"Like father, like son. Very well, Edward Cullen, I'll take you for a man of honor. Heidi will show you to your quarters when you return."
It helps, immediately, to escape the stifling confines of the Volturi chambers. Above ground the crowds are partying, turning from the day's traditional celebrations to drunken revelry as the sun sinks below the city walls. It feels as though an eternity has passed since I stood here in the piazza ready to end my life. I wonder where Bella is, how she got here, how she got away. Part of me wants to stalk these cobbled streets looking for her, chasing desperately after the scent of her, but it will get me nowhere. I need Aro to trust me if this situation is ever going to change.
Once clear of the city I take off at a sprint toward the Apennines. Hunting in Italy isn't easy, but any further afield and I risk Aro's suspicion. There are wolves in the mountains, and it doesn't take long for me to down several. I pause on a rocky outcrop, wiping blood from my mouth on the back of one sleeve. The temperature has dropped dramatically, and I feel so empty, even having just fed. It seems overwhelming. To have believed in Bella's loss so completely and to then have had her again in my arms, only to lose her once more. And now I'm trapped. I've done what I can to save her, but being here, with these vampires? With no respect for human life. The cruelty; the dispassionate enforcement of the law. It feels like Chicago all over again. I've been a vigilante once, and I swore I'd never go back.
I manage to surprise a boar, and it's enough to slake my thirst for a while. I take off back toward the city at a run.
Heidi meets me in the waiting area on my return, and walks with me down a long side corridor, decorated with priceless Renaissance art.
"You went hunting animals?"
I nod. Her eyes are an extraordinary color. She is objectively beautiful, I suppose, but in a chilling way. There isn't an ounce of emotion in her elegant features.
"What a waste of energy," she muses. "You should hunt a more challenging prey."
She stops and opens one of the wooden doors on the left, waving me in ahead of her.
"This is yours," she shrugs, looking around a tastefully appointed room. The furnishings are rich and comfortable but, with no windows, I can't escape the feeling that this is nothing more than a plush cell. "While you're here." She says it in a way that suggests others have been here before me. Others that haven't lasted very long.
I sink to the bed, and start pulling off my boots. Heidi pauses, waiting for something. I don't look up. Her thoughts are vivid enough, and she doesn't seem to need any encouragement. I watch myself through her mind's eye, naked above her, thrusting, touching, and whispering her name. It is nothing new. Tanya's imagination would leave hers for dead.
She waits. I still don't react.
"You're required in the Grand Hall tomorrow morning at nine." Her tone moves from dismissive to icy, as she turns on her heel and stalks out, slamming the door behind her.
By the looks of things, Heidi's not used to disappointment. I don't care. I'm more than used to being the cause.
The shower in the small suite is cramped, but I stay in it until the water runs cold, trying to sort out the events of the day in my head.
Bella is alive. Alive, and in danger, if I don't keep up my end of this Faustian bargain. Days ago, in Rio, I was prepared to crawl back to her. My resolve had crumbled. And then Rosalie called. My world collapsed out from under me with the news that Bella had fallen from those cold, dark cliffs. I swallowed whole the guilt and regret that I was at fault, and the abysmal sense of emptiness that ensued thinking that I outlived her.
But none of it was true. Bella lives. She breathes, and cries, and screams. She loves me. She faced down terror in coming all this way to save me, fronting up to the worst of my kind. And what have I managed to achieve? I've done it all over again, dragged her into the heart of the threat my world presents to her. Exposed her to its masters and villains. My weakness, my love, for Bella has once again put her life at risk. I can't ruin this. I can't ruin her. If I do anything in this godforsaken life, I have to keep her alive.
As I step naked back into the main room there is a sharp rap at the door, before it swings open abruptly. Caius strides in, ignoring my scramble to wrap the cloak I'd dropped on the bed around me. His translucent skin and white hair stand out in sharp relief against the midnight velvet of his garments. He is furious; his mind roiling with murderous thoughts.
I know you hear me. Let us do away with pretence.
He has come alone. I realize that he could end me right now. That this could all have been for nothing. Flush with human blood, he is infinitely stronger than I am.
The wrong decision was made today. Aro's fascination with your gift has blinded him to the law. The girl should never have been allowed to walk free.
My stone heart clenches in fear and my mind races. Can he have sent someone after Bella? Is my pact with Aro already for nothing? My eyes dart to the doorway behind Caius. I am almost desperate enough to try and make a run for it.
Still yourself, child. I will not go back on my brother's word.
He scowls at me. There is such venom in his thoughts, such cruelty, that I'm momentarily taken aback. A lifetime with Carlisle has not prepared me for the vicious barbarism, the unbridled power, which seats itself in Volterra.
Know this. Your loyalty to this house will be unwavering. You will do exactly what is asked of you, whenever it is asked, without question. One hint, the merest...suggestion...that your will is divided, and it will be my great pleasure to not only end your life, but the girl's as well.
Caius bombards me with mental pictures of Bella writhing in pain and torment, blood streaming from her wounds. My mouth falls open in a soundless cry.
Aro considers you a prize. I consider you a traitor. Your life depends on proving me wrong.
He glides from the room so swiftly I don't have time to react. I sink weakly to the floor and bury my head in my hands, longing for any sort of relief.
There is none.