Lost Memories/Amnesia Girl Chapter 39

"Amarante…How come you're not talking to Athrun?" Kira asked Amarante. They were about to sortie and Athrun had already left. She was shocked that Kira asked that question, and she hated that it was that apparent. She looked away from Kira quickly before turning back to him.

"Ah…What do you mean?" Amarante muttered turning slightly pink. The more she thought about it the more she began to believe that the kiss wasn't a dream. She could barely believe that it happened. Seeing Kira's semi-suspicious face meant that she probably wouldn't be able to get away with playing dumb.

"You two haven't been speaking to each other since two days ago," Kira replied. Well that's fantastic, it's been apparent for two days? Most of time she muttered a hello to him or a couple of words to make sure that it seemed they were okay. Yet she would bet her life on the fact that Athrun probably told Kira something.

"Everything is alright between us," Amarante replied with a sigh. "And there's another thing…" She didn't want him or anyone to know what happened between them. It would only cause her to become even more confused and hurt Cagalli. She had to tell him something to get him off her case.

"What?" Kira asked as Amarante thought of the girl in her vision. She was about eleven or twelve years old and from what she could see her hair was red. This girl has the same green eyes which Amarante inherited from her mother. It was almost uncanny, that was the most striking thing about the figure she saw.

"I have an unnerving thought that my sister will be on the battlefield, and there's this girl that I've been seeing in my visions, that looks exactly like me but her hair is curly. At least I believe that she did," she sighed once more. Her hair was curly when she was younger but it had grown straight in recent years.

"A girl that looks like you?" Kira asked. He wasn't expecting Amarante to say something like that. He looked to see her face twisted with worry. The brown haired boy never thought something like that would cause so much discontent in a person. She also used the word "vision" instead of a "dream." With all the stress everyone was going through, it was probably likely a stress induced dream.

"Yes…but I think it's only a vision," Amarante sighed. In Kira's mind, there was nothing to really worry about. She should be calm and collective instead of excited and anxious. These dreams would go away with the end of the war.

Kira placed a hand on her shoulder, "I'm sure everything will be fine. They're just stressed-induced dreams." She shuttered at his touch. She barely even knew Kira but he was so nice and helpful, but he did seem a little different from the last time she saw him. He's stronger now, then when he was in Banadiya.

"How can you be so sure…It's hard enough knowing that I'm fighting people I know…Yet, how can I fight my sister?" Amarante replied. Kira nodded before leaving with Amarante. He knew this battle oh too well. Kira fought so many people that he knew, including Amarante. He was still surprised that Amarante was still alive, although she did go through a pretty large ordeal after he almost killed her.

"Mu once told me that it's harder to fight an enemy that you know personally, and I know that this is hard, but, try not to think about it," Kira sighed. Yet, how could he sound so insensitive? She was fighting her SISTER for crying out loud! Amarante nodded once and with that Kira and Amarante finally heard the alarm for the approaching battle.

"Right, thanks," Amarante said uneasily. Even though they never really got along, Amaranta was still her sister, her twin sister. The very same soul she shared her mother's womb with. Amarante sighed, she really did not want to go out and fight her sister, BUT she had to protect the ships and her friends and "extended" family. The two floated into the elevator, the doors quickly shutting behind them.

"Whatever happens out there, remember we all have each other's backs out there," Kira said warmly to the pale faced Amarante. It must have been harder for her, since she was fighting her sister. Kira couldn't imagine the thoughts that were going through her mind. Her body was there but her mind was somewhere else. He looked at her down-casted eyes placing a hand of her shoulder again. If I'm going to fight Mara…I should be prepared for anything, Amaranta thought. She shuttered again before looking up at the concerned Kira with a smile. She didn't want him to worry about her.

"I want you to send out the triplets as well," Takahashi ordered. "Amaranta said she had sensed the girl's presence. He sat in his chair with his arms crossed.

"Isn't it a little early?" a scientist asked. He had been watching over their progress and although Armand and Alexandre had made extensive progress, Annette still lagged behind. She was extremely timid and would always cry before engaging in one of the mock simulator battles. She'd probably be in tears if she learned that she would to going out to fight.

"I want them to observe, if they want to engage they can," Mr. Takahashi growled. He hated how his scientists would worry about the three little kids. They didn't belong to anyone, and they weren't anything to gawk at. They were equipment to wipe out the Coordinators.

"Alright," the scientist began with a sigh, "do you want to give Annette a sedative?" She never wanted to harm anything. She was a pacifist, yet she was unfortunately breaking out of that shell. She had a very large drive to protect, and they could use that to their advantage.

"No, tell her anything you want. Just get that damn girl out on the battlefield," Mr. Takahashi ordered. I wish Annette would be more fearless like her brothers. I thought if I had her room with Amaranta, Annette would grow stronger. BUT that girl is just like her roommate, weak and dispensable, Mr. Takahashi thought.

"Huh," Amarante mumbled turning her head to the left sensing someone's presence. It's Amaranta, I'm sure of it! Amarante thought maxing her thrusters in that direction.

"Amarante where are you going?" Kira asked fending off an attack from the Calamity.

"Earth Forces Reinforcements are near-by," Amarante replied coldly. She felt the same feeling quickly dodging an incoming beam with a barrel roll.

"Hello Amarante, long time no see. I wonder how weak you've become since our last engagement," Amaranta mutter inside her Strike Dagger. Amaranta was engulfed with anger. That pathetic little girl was going down today!

"Amaranta!" Amarante growled before following after her attacker. Inside Athrun's cockpit he noticed Amarante's unit quickly moving away on his radar. It must be her sister…if she fights her sister away from us Amarante could be in danger, Athrun thought. He tried to follow after the girl but the incoming Raider halted him.

"Amarante! Don't stray off!" Athrun hollered at her but it was already too late. Amarante had already followed after her sister at a quick pace. Yet Amarante was prepared, she knew that she was going into a trap.

"You're the one who causes all my problems! YOU'RE the reason why Mom died!" Amaranta screamed at Amarante turning around to fire at her but the little sister already expected that, Amarante had to keep the upper hand. Who knew who was hiding in the shadows. She released the grappling hooks from her GuAIZ clipping the Strike Dagger. Amarante shuttered at the biting words of her sister.

"How could you say that? I didn't know what was going on! You didn't see Mom raped, shot and beaten to death!" Amarante replied activating the claws in her shield.

"Mom did everything for you but did nothing for me! If I was you, Mom would have hidden me in the closet! She would have allowed me to die!" Amaranta roared aiming her beam rifle at her little sister. She fired recklessly at the approaching mobile suit. Amarante huffed dodging every shot digging her claws into the Strike Dagger's shield. Amaranta thrust her shield forward shaking Amarante off the shield.

"Amaranta do you really believe something as crazy as that?" Amarante snapped aiming her beam rifle at her.

"YES! You don't remember any of it do you?" Amaranta replied. What the hell is she talking about? I remember everything now! Amarante thought.

"What don't I remember?" Amarante demanded as she blocked an incoming beam with her shield. She let out a small scream as the small explosion pushed her back. Backing out of the smoke she looked for the Strike Dagger.

"Typical…OF COURSE mom would protect YOU. Mom and Dad fought all the time! She always would make sure that YOU were safe and FAR away from the fighting!" Amaranta screamed once again firing recklessly at Amarante.

"You and I were always together! Wherever Mom took you, she took me! You were just rebellious! I CAN'T COUNT THE TMES YOU GOT OUT OF BED AFTER MOM LAID YOU DOWN!" Amarante snarled once again activating her beam claws charging her sister's mobile suit. Letting out a battle cry Amarante dug the claws into the shield. They could hear their machines creak and crack as they struggled for the upperhand.

"You're wrong! Mom never cared about me!" Amaranta hollered. She was shaking in her cockpit, she couldn't believe she was going to tell her traitorous baby sister what has been happening for years.

Flashback

Amaranta was about three when it first began, it was strange to her and she didn't understand it. Every once in a while her father would invite Amaranta in to his room. It was always when her mother was either out of the house or comforting her younger sister Amarante when she was sad or sick. The small girl was escorted down the hall by a maid, and she was always nervous. The maid was always looking over her shoulder and around corners when she escorted Amaranta to her father's room. The maid would always knock twice before fleeing, leaving Amaranta alone in front of the double doors. Whenever Little Mara saw the woman walking about she had a look of shame plastered upon her pretty little face. Amaranta always wanted to ask why she looked at her that way but she didn't want to be scolded.

"Mara!" her father chuckled in a loving manner. He came out of his room wrapping a hand around her shoulder ushering her inside with a quick push. She heard him lock the door behind them before pushing her further into his room. She gulped quietly as they made their way to his bed. Amarante was never sure what was going to happen.

"Daddy?" Amaranta asked softly. She didn't want him to do it. She never did, there was something wrong about what he did. It didn't make her feel good about herself.

"Don't talk my little girl. Now be a good girl and take off your clothes," her father ordered in a gentle loving voice. The girl's hands trembled as she fumbled with her clothes. She pursed her lips as tears came to her eyes. She wanted to go back to her own bed.

"Daddy…I want to go beddy bye," Amaranta whined softly.

"Why are you crying? Big girls don't cry!" her father grumbled. Amaranta nodded as she got down to her last article of clothing. But the tears continued as her father took her little hand pulling her closer to the bed.

End Flashback

"Amaranta," Amarante murmured. She back away from her sister's machine deactivating her beam claws. She knew she shouldn't sympathize with the enemy but Amaranta was her sister. How could she not have known? Why didn't her sister tell her what was going on?

"And when I confronted Mom…do you know what she did?" Amaranta cried out. Her tears bumped into the visor of her helmet. There were so many of them that they began to blur her vision. She knew her mother hated her, why didn't she protect her, from him? She only cared about little Amarante.

Flashback

"Mama, Daddy makes me feel bad," a now four and a half year old Amaranta asked. She nervously wrung the bottom of her dress as she looked up at her mother. Her father told her to NEVER talk to her mother about what was going on between them, yet she didn't want to.

"How does he make you feel bad my little sugar blossom?" her mother cooed stooping down to her level. Amaranta blinked worriedly looking over her shoulder for anyone who would know what was happening was behind her. She let a relieved sigh seeing that no one was there.

"He touches me her-," Amaranta began pointing to the spot but before she could finish, her mother slapped her harshly across the cheek. Her eyes welled up in tears as she touched her stinging red cheek.

"Do-Don't say that!" her mother cried outraged. She could hear her mother's hard breathing. Amaranta noticed her mother had gone back to standing and was now pacing the room. Looking up at her Amaranta saw the outrage and shame.

"MAMA! He does…whe-when you're not awound ( AN: around),"Amaranta argued. She thought she saw her mother raise her hand to hit her once again so she quickly stopped speaking.

"I said don't say that!" her mother snapped before murmuring something that Amaranta couldn't hear. She couldn't believe that her sweet and caring mother wouldn't believe her. Amaranta always thought she could go to her mother if she needed to be comforted.

End Flashback

"Mo-Mom never cared about me! She only cared about you, HER precious, little baby Amarante!" Amaranta screamed in a mocking voice. Amarante just frowned; she knew their mother wasn't like that. Her mother would never leave her sister hanging high and dry. She would protect both of them. Their mother would never do something like that, or would she?

"Amaranta," Amarante muttered again. She had almost completely forgotten about the battle since she had only been dodging the attacks from her sister. Amarante also did not notice that her flagship, an Agamemnon-class vessel named the Myrrha was rapidly approaching them. Amarante perked up experiencing that strange little flash. She made a barrel roll dodging an attack from behind. It was another Strike Dagger. What the hell? The same feeling? Amarante thought as it began to charge her. Huh? Two more? Damn, I hate to admit that Athrun was right, Amarante thought seeing two more blips appear on her radar. The new Strike Dagger began to hack recklessly at the space in front of her.

"ARMAND! This is my fight!" Amaranta hollered at the boy through her tears. He ignored the girls words as another Strike Dagger joined the battle. He couldn't help it, he loved to fight. He loved the rush he received when he destroyed enemy mobile suits in the simulators, but that was getting to bore him. He needed to kill a real person, he needed to see that real life explosion in front of him.

"Sorry Amaranta, but you're stalling too much," Alexandre replied saluting Amaranta through his monitor. They should have killed the girl, but something still didn't feel right about killing Amarante. He had so many questions but he never sought the answers to them.

"I'm going to kill her! Just you wait and see! So BACK OFF!" Amaranta screamed at the younger boys. She couldn't believe that Armand and Alexandre would barge in to the one battle that Amaranta had been waiting for.

"YOU'RE just as WEAK as that man says. If you were going to kill her you would've done it already," Armand snickered. This battle was throwing Amarante off completely. Who were these two new attackers? She continued to dodge the two boys before deploying the grappling hooks. Maybe I can damage one of them, Amarante thought. The two mobile suits dodged the hooks in an elaborate pattern. Who were these two new voices over the com system?

"Damn, this is like the time Waltfeld attacked me in the desert. Too bad I don't have any SAND!" Amarante said with surprise as the Myrrha shot at her. It barely missed the head of her mobile suit. She really should have listened to Athrun. She was fighting on their turf. This was probably a part of their elaborate scheme. Inside of her cockpit she switched to the TSA radio line to finally get in contact with her own vessel.

"Annette! You're not going to get any battle experience by sitting over there! GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE!" Armand hollered noticing that she was still hiding out near the asteroids. She gulped quietly touching the mobile suit's controls. She shivered feeling a shock run up and down her spine. Annette slowly entered the battlefield but she only stayed on the edge to make sure that she didn't have to fire upon their enemy. She felt like she was going to vomit but she didn't have any food in her stomach. Alexandre shot off a couple of rounds at Amarante. Putting up her shield, Amarante blocked as many rounds as she could before noticing that the armor was reaching its critical point. She felt another little flash as she activated the beam claws again.

"Athrun!" Amarante cried out over the com system. Amarante really wasn't one to ask for help, but now she needed it. She waited a few seconds but she sighed, she was probably out of his range. She could barely take it anymore…she knew that she would have to pull out any and all strength to finish off the four machines. Charging the two other Strike Daggers, Amarante slashed off a leg on each of the machines.

"What the?" Alexandre gasped.

"Damn-it!" Armand grumbled. This would probably throw off the balance of the two machines. He knew that he had more training than Amarante; he had everything down to a "T" in the simulators.

"Amarante?" Athrun began, "Where the hell have you been? Do you know how long I've been calling you?" He was still engaged in the attack near the Eternal but he couldn't stop worrying about Amarante. She had been gone for over 20 minutes without any response.

"Sorry, I'm still engaging my sister," Amarante replied feeling her mobile suit shake from nearby explosions.

"How many mobile suits and vessels?" Athrun demanded trying not to be distracted with the girl but she was so young AND he had promised to look after her for Nicol.

"Besides my sister, three. One that isn't engaging, and one Agamemnon class vessel," Amarante replied.

"Damn-it! Didn't I tell you not to stray off?" Athrun snapped. He didn't know why she didn't think things through this time. He knew that this was a trap and Amarante should have stayed, defending the Eternal. When she came back to the ship he was going to give her a harsh scolding.

"I know and I'm sorry Athrun!" Amarante replied unknowingly being cornered in front of the Myrrha's high energy beam cannon. She heard her mobile suit sound off as the Myrrha locked on to her. Damn…How the hell am I going to get out of this one? Amarante thought as the three mobile suits surrounded her blocking her escape. The other Dagger still remained fairly close, but not close enough to engage in the attack.

"I want you back here as soon as possible Amarante!" Athrun ordered.

"Athrun, tell Commander Waltfeld that I love him," Amarante said quietly. She knew that she was probably about to die. At least she was going to be with Nicol, and her mom. She would be able to ask her mom what truly happened all those years ago.

"AMARAN-" Athrun hollered as Amarante turned off the com system. "Amarante! AMARANTE! DAMN!" Athrun hollered before striking his instrument panel. "Kira!"

"What?" Kira asked, their battle was winding down and Athrun was confident enough that Kira and the others could handle everything.

"I'm going after Amarante! I think she's done something stupid," Athrun replied leaving the battlefield.

"I'll be with you soon…Nicol," Amarante muttered closing her eyes Amarante waited for the beam to blow her up. She even took her hands off the controls to hold herself. Dying in space in a lonely cockpit felt so cold. She at least hoped that Amaranta would allow Waltfeld to come and get her remains. She felt another flash causing Amarante to open her eyes. Quickly she place her hands back on her controls dodging the incoming laser from Amaranta machine. It all seemed like minutes were ticking by but it all happened in a matter of seconds. Everything was moving too slow for Amaranta so she took matters into her own hands.

"NNNNOOOOO!" Amaranta screeched as she saw her laser hit the bridge of the Myrrha. Amarante felt the explosion push her towards the three machines. Why did her father have to see what happened up close and personal. Why did he need to know? They should have positioned her mobile suit lower. The three Strike Daggers and the GuAIZ flew away from the explosion. The Myrrha was up in flames. Amaranta and the triplet's home was up in flames. Most of their belongings were now up in flames.

"Oh no," Alexandre murmured. They had only seen explosions like there in simulations, and now…the real horrors of war were donning on him and others.

"DAMN YOU!" Amaranta hollered pointing her beam rifle at the distracted Amarante. She quickly fired several rounds at her sister laughing manically. Amarante's heart stopped as she saw the incoming green laser. She didn't have time to move out of the way. Amaranta now truly felt justified in killing her sister. AMARANTE killed her father, AND her mother. AMARANTE was to blame for his death and the death of the crew members of the Myhrra. Although she was not completely satisfied with how she killed her sister was satisfied with the explosion that was created. She waited for the cloud to dissipate only to see a shimmer of red slowly becoming exposed. Amaranta cursed loudly seeing that the red shimmer was the red mobile suit, that they were partially briefed on. It shield was projected towards her as it firmly stood its ground in front of Amarante. It quickly fired back at the three Strike Daggers causing Amaranta, Alexandre and Armand to back off.

"That has to be one of Z.A.F.T's new machines," Annette mumbled behind the cover of some asteroids. She had left the battle when her brothers and Amaranta cornered Amarante in front of the Myrrha.

"Athrun?" Amarante muttered finally reopening the lines of communication. She was shocked to see him in front of her. Why would Athrun do that? She really didn't need that much help, besides she wanted to be with Nicol.

"Amarante, are you finally going to listen? Damn…Don't you worry me like that!" Athrun said with an angered sigh.

"Athrun…" Amarante began before getting cut off by the enraged teen. She had never seen Athrun this angry…especially at her. She could understand why he was upset but she wished that he would be his normal level-headed self.

"We're retreating," Athrun snapped as they saw signal flares from a near-by Earth Forces vessel. The four Strike Daggers quickly retreated leaving Amarante and Athrun by themselves. Once they were gone, Amarante followed Athrun silently. She knew that this time, she really messed up. She knew that Waltfeld would probably scold her just as much as Athrun. Coming closer to the Eternal Amarante tried to speak with him but he gave her the same treatment that she did he. He was probably so angry with her that he didn't know what to do with himself.