Don't know where this came from exactly. I was in a Brass mood. It's kind of a synthesis of the bits and pieces of his past that we get from time to time on the show and I suppose was inspired a little by an online conversation about the character. It's sad really, or at least I think so. Tell me what you think.

"I don't love you anymore," she told him through the tears that rolled down her cheeks. "I want to, but I just don't…"

She watched her words settle into him along with understanding. His face suddenly morphed from concern to defeat as his shoulders sagged. The blue of his eyes faded as tears that matched hers pooled. Her heart was breaking just as she knew his was.

If only he hadn't pushed the issue. If only he hadn't asked her what was wrong. If only he hadn't shown up unexpectedly. She could have kept up the masquerade indefinitely, if only…

Finally he blinked. A lone tear escaped down his cheek. She couldn't remember ever seeing him cry, but now there was that tear… the tear she caused. She was sure there were more but he was holding his emotions in check, holding back.

He cleared his throat, cast a glance around the room and shrugged again. "Okay. I'll um…I'll just get a hotel room then," he said despondently.

"Look, I…I didn't mean for it to…be like this," she told him. "I thought…I wanted to…"

"It's okay," he said acquiescently. "I suppose it was over a long time ago. I'd hope we could salvage something…for Ellie's sake. But maybe it is better this way."

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

That stirred something within him and anger surfaced. "For what? That you don't love me? Did you ever, really? Or is it for letting me think we were working it all out, that we might make it after all? Or maybe you're just sorry you married me in the first place," he finished vehemently.

"No, I…" she started to say she wasn't sorry that she'd married him. But looking into his angry features, she realized she was. She hadn't been happy from the beginning. Being his wife hadn't been what she thought it would be. She'd pictured a happy home with him around, raining attention on her. Instead, he worked a lot and was gone for days. When he was home, he was tired. And they usually argued. "I wanted things to be different…" she began.

"You knew what the job is. You knew that I'm vice, that that means being undercover … you knew."

"I thought I did. But the reality was different than what I thought."

He snorted. "Yeah, so you went looking elsewhere."

"You're not ever going to let me forget that are you?" It was her turn to be angry.

"You forget? You!" he shouted. "You think I can? Every time I look into Ellie's face, I see that bastard. I look into my little princess' face and I see him. And it hurts."

Closing her eyes in defeat, she shrugs. "I'm sorry. I've tried to …to make things right but…"

He glared at her. "…but you don't love me anymore. I get it."

Opening her eyes she looks into his, searching for understanding…maybe even forgiveness. All she sees is anger and a hardness that wasn't there before. "I did love you in the beginning, if that helps any…"

Grimacing, he snarls. "It doesn't." Then turning, he walks to the door. As his hand went to the knob to open it, he turned. "We'll settle this. But Ellie doesn't need to know….ever," he said pointedly.

"No. She doesn't. Just because we…because I can't…well, she still needs her Daddy."

They exchanged a look that sealed the agreement. Ellie would not know. He had to settle for that. One last deep sigh and he was out of the door.

He sat in his car, staring at the house for a long time. He'd tried. He done everything he could think of to make her happy, short of quitting his job. His reward for the effort, for the struggle to forgive, was this. As he drove away, he vowed he'd never trust anyone with his heart again. And one thing Jim Brass believed in was honoring vows.