Not Together

This is a follow up to "Simple Together" but it's not a songfic. I hope you all like it!

A searing bright light poured into the tiny, one room apartment. Carlos slowly opened his eyes, and stretched his arms over his head. Despite being in the city, all seemed to be quiet and still. Observing his quaint surroundings, Carlos realized he had fallen asleep on the couch again and that for the fifth night in a row his full-sized bed had not been slept in. He looked over at it, seeing how it was perfectly made. The only variation in the smooth lines was his oversized body pillow. Usually, he clung to it at night as he soaked it with his tears before he fell asleep. It almost felt...like him. He even sprayed some of Logan's favorite cologne on it. Anything to at least simulate the presence of his reason for living. It was no good, though. There was nothing like Logan being in his arms, as they fell asleep together.

"Stop it!" Carlos scolded himself, "This is no way to start the day." He rose from the couch, adjusting his navy blue sweatpants so that they were not bunched up, uncomfortably. The floor felt like ice on his bare feet as he made his way to the kitchenette. Because he didn't like coffee, Carlos liked to start his day with a strawberry-banana smoothy and a bowl of dinosaur-shaped cereal. He opened the near empty refrigerator, and grabbed the gallon of skim milk. His cereal was on top of the fridge, and he grabbed a bowl from the counter. He performed all the tasks of making his breakfast, and getting himself ready for the day, but it all felt so empty to him. It seemed so meaningless and, as usual, he ate in silence.

When he was finished, he threw the bowl in the sink and grabbed his stereo remote. With one push of the play button, Logan's voice was filling the apartment. Carlos laid on his bed, his arms wrapped firmly around his body pillow, as silent tears streamed from his eyes. Logan sang of pain, and love, as Carlos felt himself sinking further into despair.

LINEBREAK

Los Angeles was always hot at the most unfortunate moments. For example, when Logan was stuck outside on a stage that was surrounded by thousands of his biggest fans and the sun was beating down on him in an almost cruel, mocking way. That is why Logan was thanking God as he walked off the stage, and into the back of a limousine that was waiting for him. Inside, Gustavo and Kelly were already waiting for him. Each had an odd look on their face.

"Why are you looking like your puppy just died?" Gustavo demanded in his usual screaming tone, "You just made four million big ones off that performance, so you should be happy!"

"Gustavo!" Kelly warned, "Leave him alone, he is probably exhausted."

"Sorry." Logan sighed, "I'll make sure my next performance is better. Where is it, again?"

"It's in New York City." Kelly informed him, "First, you have a performance for the award show, and then you have a concert to do. It's at Madison Square Garden, and it's sold out."

"Sold out?" Kelly suddenly had Logan's full attention, "That's like.."

"20,000 people!" Gustavo cried, "Not to mention all the people who are paying big money to get their products in this concert. You're officially a star, Logan!"

"This is a huge deal." Kelly added, with a smile, "You're Gustavo's biggest success to date, Logan. You should be thrilled."

"It should be James, or Kendall." Logan shrugged, "But, I am still grateful. So, thank you. Thank you both."

"Why don't you look happy?" Kelly wondered out loud, "James, and Kendall, decided to leave."

"I don't think this is about them." Gustavo pointed out, "Logan, I know I don't seem like the nicest guy but listen to me; it wasn't your fault."

Logan found himself at a loss for words. It was rare that Gustavo was kind, or thoughtful, and so he knew he must really look like a wreck in order to cause Gustavo to be concerned. He couldn't help it, Carlos had broken his heart. He leaned back in his seat, trying to force the tears back down. The last thing he wasn't was to break down in front of Gustavo, and Kelly. Instead, he decided to think about something else. When he got to New York, he would try to call James. Maybe he wasn't mad anymore. A few minutes later, the limousine was pulling into a private airport hanger where a G-Five was waiting for them. The door next to Logan was yanked open, the sunlight blinding him, and he felt his security detail pulling him toward the jet. He wasn't even paying attention as he was lead wherever they were taking him. It could have been a crazy, stalker fan, for all he knew; he didn't really give a damn. Alas, he was forced up the steps of the plane and was told to buckle his seat belt for the 7 hour plane ride. He stared out the window as the jet lifted off the runway, watching as everything beneath him became small. With a mournful sigh, he wondered what Carlos was doing.

LINEBREAK AGAIN

The sensation that a hammer was smashing into his head woke Carlos up a few hours later. He hadn't meant to fall asleep again, but it just happened. Logan's voice was still playing over the speakers, and so Carlos turned it off. He climbed off the bed, and walked into his bathroom to look for headache medicine, cursing himself for crying again. After taking his medicine, Carlos walked to the window and pulled back his blackout curtains. The sun was slowly starting to fall, which told him it must have been late afternoon. He decided that he would take a walk, since it wasn't quite dark yet. After slipping on his jacket, and boots, he was out the door.

New York City was a city that got to be very cold, and now was one of those times. By the time Carlos was one block away from his apartment, he was already shivering. Still, despite the cold Lower Manhattan was a very fascinating place. There was quite an eclectic mix of people wondering about the city. However, Carlos noticed that they all had one thing in common; none of them were alone. Everyone seemed to have a friend,a lover, a spouse, or even a child. Everyone, but him. He had nobody, and nothing, which was just what he thought he deserved.

It wasn't long before Carlos found himself in Rockefeller Square, which he recognized because of the Radio City Music Hall. It seemed that quite a large event was going on as there were paparazzi everywhere, and endless crowds of people. Then, Carlos remembered that it was the night of the Music Video Awards. He was going to watch it, but didn't really see the point since Logan didn't have any nominations. Still, Carlos felt his curiosity growing and he decided to get closer to the event. He pushed his way through the crowd, politely but still aggressively and that was when he heard it.

"Logan!" a fan-girl screamed, "Logan Mitchell!"

Carlos craned his neck over the people, and sure enough he saw Logan waving to the crowds of people. He felt like time suddenly froze, and he was paralyzed by emotion. Carlos didn't even realize that he had somehow made his way to the the front of the red velvet rope, or that Logan had seen him and was walking toward him. He was paralyzed.

LINEFREAKINGBREAK

"Let him in!" Logan yelled to a security guard, over the roar of the crowd, "Let this man through!" The guard gave Carlos a nod, and Carlos was rolling under a rope. Logan grabbed his hand, and they quickly ran into the building. Logan lead him down a series of long hallways, filled with security and celebrities. Finally, they made it to Logan's dressing room where Logan locked the door behind them.

"You came to see me!" Logan exclaimed, "I can't believe it."

"I didn't come for you." Carlos replied, "It was a coincidence."

"I don't understand." Logan's face fell, "I thought you changed your mind."

"I didn't change anything." Carlos lied, "I still don't want to be with you. I only came to be polite, but I really want to leave."

"Please, stay." Logan pleaded, "Screw my performance, we can stay back here and talk."

"What is there to say?" Carlos asked, "We broke up, and now it is time to move on."

"The only thing broken is my heart!" Logan cried, "I hate living without you, Carlos. I am so miserable, I don't even want to do this anymore. I don't care about fame, or money. I just want you."

"Well, that is too bad." Carlos responded, praying that Logan didn't see his lip quiver, "Because, I don't want you."

Carlos turned on his heel, and left the room. The moans, and cries, of Logan could be heard all the way down the hall. As he heard Logan screaming his name, he tried desperately to remind himself that he was doing this for Logan. Still, the sound would be burned forever in his mind.

"C-Carlos!" Logan sobbed, his voice the voice of a truly broken person. Carlos walked out into the cold, night air, feeling more alone than ever.

-The End