Now here comes the fun Christmas party. Expect a lot of funny scenarios and a lot of stupid moments. Merry Early Christmas! 'This is a present from me to you.' (Goldman, House of the Dead 2)
Snowed In
Chapter 7
Christmas Day: Party Time
The guests begin to arrive
"Yeah, about a good two hours. So let's finish setting things up." Pantsman then walked towards a large object covered with a white sheet. Placing a hand on it, Pantsman looked at the crowd. "Look and behold what happens when you have too much time on your hands thanks to writer's block!" Pulling the sheet, Pantsman revealed a massive machine equipped with state of the art equipment and gadgets. "What the hell is that thing?" DJ asked before the others could ask the same question. "This, my acquaintance, is a dimensional transporter, capable of creating portals to each video game realm where I sent invites to certain characters for the party." "So you're telling me you made a fucking dimensional transporter and yet you can't draw a damn comic page?" "Ah, so that's the thing I used to go to other worlds…" Leo mused. "WHEN THE HELL DID YOU USE THIS THING! NO ONE EVEN KNOWS ABOUT IT!" Pantsman yelled while the others looked at the tomcat curiously. "You really need to cut on the drinking. Last time, you showed me this thing and sent me to Central Highway in Megaman: Maverick Hunter X where I almost got killed by Vile. You told me to hand out an invite to X cause you wanted him to feel better about not being included in Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 and prank Zero with a 'I have green glass boobs' sign too. In fact, I even have this cool souvenir from X." Digging into his pockets, Leo pulled out X's modified (by Dr. Thomas Light) XBuster and placed it on his arm. It fused with the boy's hand until it perfectly fit. "Charge…" A charging sound came from the buster while everyone looked wide eyed in fear, knowing the devastating capabilities of the weapon. "Leo… don't you dare…" "Oh… I dare…" Aiming the cannon at Pantsman, Leo gave a devilish smirk at the startled superhero. The buster had then reached its maximum power, making the cat grin that much more. Gripping his arm with his other arm to keep it steady, the cat was prepared to fire. "LEO, DON'T DO IT!" Pantsman yelled, fearing the worst. "FULL POWER CHARGE SHOT! NOW! HI-YAAAHHHH!" With that he released the charge shot. Pantsman closed his eyes, expecting death to claim him by vaporization. The shot veered by him and instead hit the corpse of Duke Nukem. With a small explosion, the table and corpse exploded, both completely disintegrated by the blast. "Damn… Overkill dude…" DJ whistled before speaking to the cat. "Like I said, Duke is dead to me." Leo beamed.Aeris shook her head in annoyance. "Should've seen that coming… Last time he did that, he was playing Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and his victim was an old grandma." "And that's not all. He sent me to 20XX, Fancy Pants' World, the Kanto Region, and the Wild West." "Who the hell was there that you invited?" "Rockman, Fancy Pants, Pikachu, Red Harlow, and John Marshton. Oh, and technically, you invited them while you were drunk out of your freaking mind. Oh and you sent me to the Midgar slums and the Shinra Corporation Building." Aeris squealed, knowing full well who was coming to the party as well. She couldn't wait to see those two…
"Well, this was unforeseen." "What are you talking about? I told you what happened when you sobered up and left a voice recording, and sent it in a letter!" "Oh… shit! I deleted the message and threw away the mail…" "Way to go, hero…" Pilgrim chided. The machine suddenly activated as the group turned to face the machine. A massive blue-white portal opened in the precise center of the machine, the entry point for the guests. "Our first guests… Where are they from? Go look at the machines coordinates, Aeris." "Alright." Looking at the coordinates, the massive complexity formed a simple answer: The realm of Street Fighter. "Ah shit… It's someone from Street Fighter." "Oh… he's here then." Pantsman spoke. The portal flashed a brilliant white as a figure finally stepped through. "Mwahahaha… So… a new world… strange… Hmm… this will make an ideal headquarters for Shadowlaw…" "SHIT! BISON!" Leo yelled loudly upon realizing that instead of the guest, M. Bison (the primary antagonist of the Street Fighter series) stepped through. Pantsman took a stance against the would-be-dictator, but Leo stopped him. "Are you fucking crazy? He'll kill you! Only a scant few can take this guy down! If you try to fight him, he'll crush you with his Psycho Power!" Scott and Ramona let their stances fall upon realizing the devastating truth behind the cat's words. "Hmm… it seems that my reputation precedes me, even in this new dimension. The boy was wise to warn you about my powers…" "What are we gonna do? We're so fucked!" "I know his tricks and skills so I'll take him on." "Leo, are you insane? You told us what we're up against! There's no way you can beat this guy!" "I know his tricks, so he won't get me that easily." "It's suicide!" "Hell, at least you guys can get away while I hold this prick off."
The tomcat stood, facing the madman. Bison sneered at the boy with a sadistic grin. "It doesn't even matter that you know my skills, boy! When I am done with you, I'll use you and your DNA for my experiments. I never expected to come to a dimension where animals are sentient beings…" "Try me, dickhead!" Before the fight could begin, another brilliant light poured from the portal. All were blinded by it as its intensity only increased. Out of the middle of nowhere, a scream sounded, coming from in front of Leo. When the light faded, only one person stood there, Bison nowhere to be seen. Glaring fiercely at the cat, Akuma, the Raging Demon, stood where M. Bison used to be. Aeris gulped. She knew exactly what happened right then and there. Akuma had killed Bison with his ultimate technique: Shin Goku Satsu. After all, Leo would beat her on Street Fighter 4 with said move. Pantsman simply breathed the following phrase: "We are all so fucking screwed…" The red-eyed man slowly strode towards the trembling feline, who somehow held his composition despite the fact that if he did anything odd, Akuma could kill him in a heartbeat. Standing in front of Leo, Akuma looked at him then lifted a hand and pat the cat on his head before saying, "That takes real courage to do that. Don't do it again unless you want to throw away your life." Pantsman yelled, "Where the hell is Ryu Hoshi!" "Oh, he couldn't make it, so he let me have the invite." "What about Ken Masters?" "Spending Christmas with his wife and daughter." "Blanka?" "With his mother." "Zangief?" "Back in Russia, wrestling for his country." "Sakura? Karin? Chun-Li? Guile?" "With Karin on her personal yacht on a trip around the world to search for good fighters while honing their abilities against each other. Taking a long deserved break from Interpol. 'Going home to be a family man.".
"All right then… so what now?" "I brought the latest edition of Rock Band." Scott went wide-eyed upon hearing this. "Akuma, does it have the track 'Surfin' Bird' by the Trashmen?" "Yup, great track. Just don't play it around Adon… he starts doing the monkey and never stops… He's like Peter Griffin from Family Guy." "Sweet! Gotta try that right now!" "Also, I brought this stuff. Ryu said it was a gift from Rose." Pulling in a large box through the portal, which promptly sealed after him, Akuma opened the contents to reveal a massive assortment of fine Italian drinks. "Ooooohohoho…. Stuff looks good." "I second that." "Pantsman, you are forbidden to drink any of this, got it?" "But, it's wine, not vodka!" "Drink a drop, and you'll know how Tommy Good Boy felt to be neutered because the last thing I want to see is a drunken idiot running around without his underwear on." "Sheesh, Aeris…" "Hey guys! Look, the portal is turning on again." Ramona shouted. Her words were 100% true as the portal opened once more, this time splitting into 2. 15 silhouettes stood at the entry points, 7 on the left, 8 on the right.
Meanwhile…
Using the infamous spear hidden inside his own palm, Scorpion was grabbing vegetables and meat out of the fridge while Kirby kept the refrigerator from closing, slightly drooling due to the amount of food. Scorpion flung whatever meat products overhead towards Kratos, who proceeded to slice them down into decent sized portions. After all was pulled out, Kirby pulled out the massive cooking pot he used in Smash Bros. Brawl and filled it with water while Scorpion used his Hellfire skill to light the wood set underneath the pot. "You do know I can cut the veggies, Scorpion." "Yeah, I know Kratos, but your blades will only make the slices huge. We'll have to wait until HE shows up. Kirby, grab the spices and start simmering the pot." "Po-yo!" With that, the small Star Warrior grabbed several spices out of one of the kitchen cabinets and started spicing the soup. "Whatever you say, now to slice up this stuff like how I did Zeus." With a yell, Kratos pulled the Blade of Olympus from behind him and started cutting into the thick amounts of meat, while Kirby froze wide-eyed in fear as Kratos had a gaze that could make even the strongest fighter freeze in fear, all while reminiscing over how gruesomely he killed his own father. (Why are Scorpion and Kratos are on good terms? The latter was in the recent Mortal Kombat PlayStation port.)
Back with the group…
"HOLY SHIT! IT'S MY FAVORITE TEAM OF COMBAT SQUADS!" "HOLY SHIT! IT'S MY FAVORITE GROUP OF ZOMBIE KILLERS!" The two cats and three humans yelled upon looking at the cast of the 2 Left 4 Dead games and the entire team of Team Fortress 2. "Hey? Where's Bi-" "Leo, shut up…" Aeris quickly silenced the boy before he said something that would bring up a painful memory. "So, this is the place, huh? Meh… I've been to better…" "Nick, you douche! Shut up! At least we came here instead of staying at that shitty hotel for Christmas." Zoey said towards Nick. "AND we're here instead of there where you were constantly getting pounced on by Hunters that want to ass-fuck you." (In my version, that seems to happen quite a lot to Nick more than the others…)Rochelle spat at the arrogant man, who in return only rolled his eyes while everyone else, including the Team Fortress guys, started snickering at the remark. "So what did you guys bring? Please tell me you didn't bring any armaments because…" Pantsman asked the group then pointed at Leo, who was distracted by the smell of the soup mix. "It's Christmas, dude! So hell no! Except Pyro and his flamethrower, but that's for other purposes…" Engineer responded. "Then for the love of God, keep that thing away from…" Pantsman once again pointed at the gray feline, who was now having a conversation with Scorpion and Kratos about the creative and messy ways of fatalities. "So, in any case, we brought all of the decorations! Team, set 'em up!" The Team fortress group then split up, each holding their separate decorations, and started sprucing up the massive living room with many decorations and ornaments, Scout even being funny enough to set a mistletoe at the doorway from the kitchen to the living room (with Heavy's help, of course). Scott and Ramona went to assist them while Pantsman slipped away to try and swipe a drink while Aeris sighed in annoyance before going after him. The doorbell rang shortly after, signifying that another guest had arrived for the party. "Po-yo!" Kirby squeaked before going to the door. Fluttering a little, the puffball grabbed the handle and after a few efforts, turned the knob and pulled the door back. At the door stood two men: two very familiar zombie killers… Waving his nubby little arms, Kirby greeted Frank West and Chuck Greene, both who were invited by Pantsman personally, before returning to the kitchen to monitor the stew, Pyro now helping with the food, giving advice about precise cooking temperatures for great meals.
Frank took a quick picture of the party, followed by him saying, "Fantastic!" before placing the camera on the countertop, injecting himself with his daily vaccine, and walking inside, and followed shortly by Greene, who marveled at the current state of the party. Giving their hellos to everyone else, Frank and Chuck spilt up and started helping out in their own way: Frank with the drinks (cause I make mean drinks in Dead Rising 1), and Chuck with the Christmas tree. However, a strange incident occurred only moments later. Zombies had broken down the front door, apparently following Frank and Chuck. Frank moaned in annoyance and said, "Aren't there other guys you corpses can go after besides me?" Chuck and the Left 4 Dead crew responded, "Now you know how we feel..." However, the portal had activated once again, due to a shocked Medic hitting the lever, but this time splitting into three. The zombies began to drag themselves to their prey and since no one had any weapons (Pyro can't cause he'll burn the whole place down, Kratos couldn't, not without making a mess.) no one could fight back against them. "We're about to have our brains eaten, aren't we?" DJ sighed in annoyance. Aeris responded, "Nope, just all of us except you, Pantsman, and Leo." "FUCK YOU!" when said person yelled that statement, an undead monster reached out and grabbed DJ and began to draw him into the fold of their inescapable ranks. "Well, looks like you do have a brain, DJ. Sucks to be you." FUCK YOU!" DJ yelled as the horde surrounded them, many of them drooling disgusting mix of saliva and blood in anticipation of the soon to be feast… Shortly after, the sounds of bullets and plasma shots rang from the entry points, each one hitting their mark: square in the head. The shots were so precise, that no brain matter or blood had been blown out of each fallen undead. All collapsed after taking the fatal injuries, while X, Rockman (Megaman), Red Harlow, and John Marshton stepped through, each of them blowing the smoke off of their weapons of choice. "Okay now, let's get these things outta here before they stain the floor! Thanks you guys." "That wasn't too hard!" "No problem." "All that was is easy target practice." "…"
"Oh, hey X!" "Hello, Leo." "So how's it going?" "Can't complain. Can't complain." "How was the joke I played on Zero?" "Hilarious. No one at Hunter HQ stopped laughing once they read that. AXL even transformed into Zero and ran around like a prancing pony, shouting 'Look at my boobs! They're so big and green.' 'Anyone wants to touch 'em? They light up when you do it right!' all while rubbing them and faking erotic moans. The whole base was hysterical!" At that point, everyone started laughing (save Red and John, who only chuckled slightly) hard when they imagined that situation. "Best part was the ballerina part. AXL did a perfect re-run of the Swan Princess still posed as Zero while wearing a tutu. I have to say, AXL is one of the best jokesters I've seen in a while. Short version, by the end of the day, Zero was so furious; he started attacking anyone who said the jokes. He eventually found out who started it, and then he found and chased after AXL and me for starting the joke, the whole time trying to use his Z-Buster on us after our shifts." (Zero humiliation!) Laughter erupted throughout the entire building as X told the funny misadventures he had the day previous to everyone there. "Serves pony-tail boy right for stealing your spotlight, X!" "Man… I wonder what everyone sees in that emo-reploid anyway."
Time passed, and more laughs were had by everyone who came. More and more came to join the festivities, including a spiky yellow haired mercenary, and a long white haired (dare I say it?) soldier/messiah (/momma's boy). At that one instant, it seemed as if though the two cats traded places, what with Aeris fawning over the both of them and taking pictures with her phone, while Leo rolled his eyes in annoyance. "Yeesh… Even I don't go that crazy… Except that time I met the heart from the Legend of Zelda…" he muttered while the girl was asking them so many questions at such a rapid pace, many times hinting at certain themes which would make a lot of straight fans go bat-shit crazy if I were to mention her words.
Outside, nearby the woods, Marcus Fenix and Leo were cutting down trees, using the trusty Lancer, for firewood. The cat had wondered what kind of speed and power the blades held and learned firsthand the strength of each blade. Laughing maniacally as he cut through the 3rd tree, Leo sliced through it cleanly while Marcus smiled to himself, reminiscing when he and Dominic Santiago would practice with the Lancers' chainsaw feature before Emergence Day. Inside the house, the party had become lively. With Sephiroth's appearance, the stew was well on its way to completion, thanks to the fine, precise and rapid slices done to all of the vegetables. The roast beef, the turkey, and the other main courses were well on their way to perfection while the Left 4 Dead crew began making the desserts such as gingerbread men and other tasty treats. (All while listening to Ellis talking about fiascos that he and his buddy, Keith, had during Christmas, despite the constant pleas from the others, especially Aeris, for the teen to please shut the fuck up.) Over in the living room, Akuma, Sonic the Hedgehog, Scott Pilgrim, and Luigi were playing the latest edition of Rock Band: Akuma manning the microphone, Sonic and Scott with the guitars and Luigi with the drums playing "Get Down with the Sickness" while several onlookers cheered at their excellent performance (Ramona and Amy Rose obviously being some of them). Pantsman was finally able to finally sneak by Aeris and gulp down a drink of wine but he wasn't seen for quite a while afterwards. Some people would spot the pink cat-girl walking around with an evil smile plastered on her face shortly after the hero vanished. Squall Lionheart was playing a tag-team Yu-Gi-Oh match with a deck loaned from Ternaldo alongside Link, while Demo-man was the lion's partner. Normally, Ternaldo would freak out about playing against new players but these three were an exception, especially Squall, who was familiar with playing dueling cards. The four sat close by the heavily decorated Christmas tree, all of them silent, waiting for Demo-man's move (none of them knowing he was drunk out of his mind and playing random but extremely lucky cards against the other team). Marcus and Leo walked inside carrying the firewood and placing the pieces next to the fireplace, while Sniper, Rockman, Mario, and Pikachu were making snowmen outside on the front lawn. (Johnny EvilGuy attempted to switch the hats again, but he was caught and promptly had the shit beaten out of him by his last two victims, Leo even chasing after him with the Lancer Marcus loaned him.) Krug had tried a few times to sample the soup, but all times, he was comically stopped by the chefs: Kratos, Kirby, Scorpion, Sephiroth, Medic, Pyro, and Sniper, while Spy was secretly recording Krug's failed attempts through the ventilation system above the living room. (Seriously, ever see Sephiroth slicing veggies? If I ever find the link to the Christmas picture, I'll place it for you guys). Engineer and Miles 'Tails' Prower were using their tools to modify equipment and game consoles not yet used by the group. Everyone, (including an uninterested Cloud,) was watching the band, the Raging Demons, perform (NOTE: I simply made the name, the Raging Demons. Get the pun?). The party was in full swing and nothing could possibly bring down this excellent cheer!
"Hey? Anyone seen Leo or Aeris anywhere?" DJ noticed, since he had heard nothing from either of them within the last hour.
Downstairs in the cellar…
"That motherfucking bastard! I SWEAR TO GOD WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE, I WILL SLICE SNAKE'S BALLS OFF SLOWLY AND PAINFULLY, SHOVE THEM UP HIS ASS AND THROW HIM INTO A GODDAMN MEAT GRINDER WHILE I WATCH HIM GET SLICED AND GRINDED TO BURGER PATTIES! THEN I'LL SERVE HIM TO EVERYONE IN THE FUCKING HOMELESS SHELTER WITH SNAKE PATTIES! I'M MISSING THE DAMN PARTY BECAUSE OF THAT SON OF A BITCH AND IT'S SO FUCKING COLD IN HERE!" Snake had infiltrated the party using his camouflage-gear and locked the cats in the downstairs cellar/freezer in revenge of what happened years ago. He came to ruin the party, then blame Leo and Aeris for all of the chaos he was soon going to cause upstairs. The mercenary then vanished upstairs, causing a few mishaps with his camouflage gear, such as lifting Ramona's shirt and Amy Rose's skirt in front of everyone, prompting a few nosebleeds and fights, and filling the strawberry shortcake with super-hot hot-sauce, turning poor Kirby into a miniature flamethrower. Red's prized possession, the Widowmaker pistol he got from killing Governor Griffin, was stolen and placed into John Marshton's holster, prompting a gun-fight between the two. Frank's Zombrex medication was stolen as well, and if that wasn't found within the hour, then Frank… wouldn't be making many appearances in Marvel vs. Capcom from that day on out. Being a real friend, Chuck started skimming the house up and down searching for the Zombrex, having no idea that Snake left it in the cellar with Leo and Aeris to frame them for Frank's zombification and death. The sneaky bastard even got Samus Aran drunk during the party. Last time DJ saw the female intergalactic bounty hunter, she was grinding her hips (without the power suit and most of the zero suit, mind you) against Master Chief in a drunken but seductive manner while several onlookers were doing catcalls. Someone even reduced X and Rockman to a severe state of depression by leaving notes saying that Capcom would rather have Zero as their poster boy, despite the fact that they started most of the company's fame. "This place is going to hell in a hand-basket. Where the hell are those two cats? I gotta get some help. But time is short… I have to find them fast. Maybe they know who's doing this shit… But… how will I find them without losing time? *GASP* DIO! Of course!"
Swiping another of Scott's gadgets, a wristband that can temporarily grant other video game characters powers to the wearer, DJ set out to find Dio Brando. Said vampire was leaning on the wall next to the front door, watching the chaos unfold. When things increased in instability, Dio noticed that someone or something was causing this to happen, but whoever was doing this had blocked his sense of smell with military grade odor masking agents and there were too many people at the party for the vampire to spot the troublemaker or sense his heartbeat. In short, not even he could find the one responsible, even if he used The World to freeze time to try to find him. This trouble maker was completely invisible to both the vampiric and naked eye. A finger tapped the vampire on his shoulder, prompting him to turn around, him now facing one of the courteous hosts of this party. "Is there something you need?" "I need The World." The vampire lifted an eyebrow in curiosity. The boy in front of him just asked to use his stand, The World, completely out of nowhere. Scoffing, Dio continued, "Now why would such a courteous young man ask to use the most powerful Stand that exists?" "Because, Dio, I know that you know that if this strife continues-" "Did someone call me?" "FUCK NO, CLOUD! GO BANG SEPHIROTH FOR ALL I CARE, GODDAMMIT!" "Sorry, not interested…" "Ok… in any case, Dio, if this chaos keeps happening, then I'm sure that this is only the tip of the iceberg. I need to use your Stand, The World, in order to reduce the time to search for my friends while I walk within the frozen time." "Aren't there others here that can freeze time here too?" "What? You mean Shadow the Hedgehog over there? Yeah, he can, but I have a much better chance talking to you than some emo. You have some form of logical sanity, aside him. I need The World to find them. I'm sure they know who the hell is causing all of this shit. And besides, if you went missing, you'd know that Iced would try to find you like I'm trying to find my friends, before Jean-Pierre Polnareff killed him." "…"
Back in the cellar…
Pacing back and forth inside the cellar, Aeris was gradually growing angrier and angrier as time passed. She and Leo had already been trapped within the cellar for an hour and a half. Leo wasn't in such good spirits either. Sure, he was with Aeris, but this was a hell of a party; one that he refused to miss out on.
"MOTHERFUCKING SON OF A BITCH! SNAKE, YOU ASSHOLE! I SWEAR ON MY FAMILY LINE AS A LEONARDO, YOU ARE GONNA DIE HORRBILE AND TWISTED AMOUNTS OF DEATHS WHEN I GET OUT OF HERE!" (The following paragraph has been censored for extreme and excessive use of Aeris' potty-mouth, but I'll give you a hint about what she said. It had something to do with a blindfold, chloroform, Major Payne, a chainsaw, a bottle of lube, Raiden, and a video camera.). The freezing temperatures were slightly worse than outside, especially since the son of a bitch stole their protective gear, cell phones, and video games after he tranquilized them earlier. Both were angry: Aeris because of Snake still going after her and this time dragging Leo into it; Leo for once again going after her and him missing out on the party. They had tried every possible method to search for means and ways of escape, but aside the entrance to the cellar, there was no other way out of the basement. "Goddammit… I was going to use Marcus' Lancer again! I swear, if I see Snake, I'll shove the blade up his ass and rev the damn thing!" "How the hell are we going to get out now?" "We can't… the only thing we can do now is hope that someone will notice we're gone." "Come on, DJ. Don't let us down." "And even if they find the cellar entrance, Snake barred the damn thing with reinforced steel. No one here can get through that without causing collateral." "So basically, we are royally fucked, right Aeris?" "Pretty much… I'm fucking freezing in here. Fucking Snake has gotten on my last nerves… it will be his fucking end when I get out of here." "And boy, will I help…"
"MUDAHMUDAHMUDAHMUDAHMUDAH!"
The immediate sounds of fists smashing against the steel reinforcement on the entrance to the cellar sounded abruptly, startling the two, if only for a brief moment, but not as much as the door being smashed so hard that it flew off of its hinges and flew straight at them. Aeris, natural reflexes kicking in, was able to get out of the way before it hit her, but her best friend/secret sin wasn't so fortunate…
'Ahh… Fuck me." *CRASH*
"What the hell was that?" "That would be me, Aeris." DJ stood smirking at the doorway, blood red eyes and sharp teeth showing on his face. Aeris was surprised to see this new version of him, but considering his changes, he probably used someone's powers, she figured. "Where the hell were you? We got stuck down here for 1 hour and a half." "Well, I was searching up and down this place 30 seconds ago! It took me about an hour to find you, Aeris! Any idea where Leo is?" "He's right there-"She pointed to where he stood, but he wasn't standing there. A soft moan did come from behind the door DJ smashed through using The World to break through it. DJ went wide-eyed realizing that he just put him into an absolute 'World' of pain. (Aeris: BOO! FUCKING TERRIBLE JOKE, LUX!) Grabbing the door, DJ lifted the steel off of a heavily disorientated and stunned Leo. "Dude! Good Lord, I'm sorry! You alright?" Suddenly, DJ was sent through an immense amount of pain as a grey fur-covered fist smashed him clean in the crotch. Collapsing to his knees DJ groaned in pain while Leo rose to his feet, still stunned, but spoke, "I am now…" "I fucking save you and I get this?" "Yes, yes you do. Just consider yourself fortunate that I didn't get caught behind that, otherwise, your mother will be asking me why she never sees grandchildren after the party is over. In any case, how did you do that?" "I loaned Dio Brando's powers to find you guys. What the hell happened and how the hell did you guys get here?" "Solid Snake came back. He knocked us out and left us in here. I think he's going to sabotage the party." "Oh, then he's almost done, then. Samus got drunk, Luigi used the Negative Zone and a lot of people, including Pantsman, are high out their minds out of pure drunkenness, Red and John are dueling over the Widowmaker, Kirby ate hot-sauce and is now a puffball flamethrower, basically, everything's going to hell, and I am already scarred enough by learning how much of your yaoi stuff is real, Aeris. Most of the drinks were laced with alcohol. We have to stop Snake before he does any more damage! Is Frank's Zombrex medicine here?" "Yeah, Snake left it over there on that box." DJ dove into his pockets and pulled out another bracelet developed by Pantsman. "I swiped some others powers too. Aeris, you might like this one. Fortunately, he was too drunk, that while he was making out with Cloud, he never noticed me swiping them from him." Aeris blushed again, knowing full well who he was talking about. She would be sleeping quite well tonight, knowing that dream was now real. "Leo, take mine. I'm pretty sure you guys can get him. He's using the camo gear, which is probably why not even the Team Fortress Spy can't see him. Damn that technology of his." "What time is it?" "Nearly 11. Get this bastard out so us sane ones can try to undo the damage."
Snake: The Douche that nearly ruined Christmas Day
Snake chuckled to himself as more chaos unfurled as the Left 4 Dead cast (all of them save Bill, and we know why Bill isn't here) and the Team Fortress squad fought against each other after rude comments were made. "Voice modifiers… ya gotta love 'em." He easily started a dispute using Nick's voice which quickly escalated into a brutal fight, inside the house no less, thanks to his goading. The party was ruined, Frank's time was nearly up, and Kirby was still squeaking as fire still shot from his mouth. Most of the others were still under the effect of Luigi's Negative Zone, meaning that now that the two cats were gone, no one could stop Snake for the grand finale of his scheme: Swipe all the loot and blame Aeris for it. All of this was simply to pay her and Leo back for kindergarten. It seemed petty, but the two had humiliated him on grand scales in the past so, to him, it seemed only fair he humiliated the both of them in a way beyond others. Grabbing a large Santa sack from the coat closet next to the front door, Snake prepared to steal everyone's gear, until…
"SNAKE, YOU BASTARD!" Aeris screamed as she grabbed the cloaked mercenary's face and slammed him outside through the front door, her following after him, black feathers leaving a trail behind her. DJ and Leo walked from the cellar stairs to the living room shortly after the door was destroyed. "Are you sure you don't want to help her?" "Solid Snake is her problem and, trust me, if she has a problem of any caliber or sort that annoys her to an extreme, then she can handle it herself. Besides, I don't want to be present for what she does to him." The two spoke as deafening screams erupted from outside, followed by apologies and such. But the screams and explosions that took place outside made it definitely clear that Aeris would have no mercy for Snake for this stunt he pulled on her.
Sometime later…
Many of the guests had to retire to the guest rooms upstairs due to drunkenness and other problems that occurred while some others went back to their own dimensions. But for the most part, the party was saved from the brink of destruction. Leo left to go back to the apartment to pick up some fresh clothes for Aeris (no one knowing about this) while the girl, coated in blood, awaited his return. Krug was eating a new stew and thanking Aeris for the new ingredient for it. The rest of the group (Pantsman, who had recovered from his drunkenness without turning into Peter Pantsless miraculously, Scott Pilgrim, Ramona, Red Harlow, a zombified John Marshton (Red killed him but he came back moments later after the chaos ended), Kirby, Tails (who doesn't drink), Squall, Sephiroth, Dio, Pikachu, Luigi, Scout, Medic, Pyro, Sniper, Frank West, Chuck Greene, Coach, Nick, Ellis, Francis, Zoey, Louis, Fancy-Pants (can't drink, he's a stick figure with pants), and Sonic all sat down in front of the TV to watch classic Christmas specials. The program on television right now was 'A Christmas Story', the priceless tale of a child who wanted a BB gun for Christmas. Everyone there was enjoying the movie too much to even notice Leo slip back in, hand Aeris her clothes, giving each other a quick peck on the lips before the girl went upstairs to shower the blood off of her body before the copper smelling liquid stained her fur permanently, while the boy sat back down with the group to watch the movie with them. The group watched more movies and simply un-winded from their partying. The air had become peaceful and calm as the snow fell outside, but like the atmosphere around the Christmas celebrators, the snowfall was tranquil as well. Even though Snake's mishaps had nearly ruined the party, it was saved, saved by a girl with a temper as short as a pinkie finger. But eventually the others had to retire as well, almost all of the guests returning to their worlds, every one of them enjoying the Christmas festivities, until it was just Scott, Ramona, Leo, Aeris, Pantsman, and DJ. After cleaning up after the guests, Pantsman offered some of the guests rooms for the exhausted group, to which they gladly accepted, Pantsman retired to his bedroom, wishing the others a Merry Christmas, and claiming that he had received the biggest hang-over yet and surprised that he wasn't pants-less, until he shuffled away, the others noticing his pants had fallen to the floor as he shut the door behind him. DJ immediately passed out on the couch downstairs after drinking one last can of Pineapple Fanta, a very loud belch signifying his sleeping state.
Scott and Ramona took the guest room downstairs while the cats would take the other. The two would've used separate rooms, but the last one was locked for some weird reason. Faint moans could be heard behind the door though… Removing their shoes, the two curled underneath the massive and fluffy comforter, both settling into bed embracing each other warmly as the comforter protected them from the chilly air inside the normally unused guest room.
"Well… that was one hell of a party, right?" "Yeah…" "Well… let's get some sleep. We can go back to the apartment tomorrow, ok?" "Yeah, sure Aeris…" "Merry Christmas." "Merry Christmas… Hey… What do you think the New Year will be like?" "Who knows, Leo… but we can find that out together, right?" "Yeah…" A quick kiss was the last thing they did before quickly falling asleep in each other's arms, both of them waiting for tomorrow to rise and see what would happen between not only themselves, but for everyone around them.
The following morning…
Samus Aran awoke with an absolutely killer headache. She had no true recollection of what happened last night. If anything, the last thing she remembered was drinking some soda, weird tasting stuff, and everything simply got dizzy for her. Going downstairs, she saw a teapot set on the oven and a note left by the host, saying the coffee is free to drink and located in the cabinet next to the refrigerator. Setting the teapot, Samus waited for the water to boil inside the pot while rubbing her temples in pain. She figured that someone must've spiked the drink or replaced the soda with alcohol. It seemed logical enough. The pot began to whistle as the water reached its boiling point. Pouring some water into a cup, Samus was about to pour some of the coffee mix until someone tapped her on the shoulder. Still suffering from the headache, she was easily agitated and spun around, ready to yell at this person. She froze however when she saw who it was… Master Chief, without his battle armor, wearing a white towel wrapped around his waist. Even though he was still wearing the helmet, Samus could already feel that something happened last night. And her fear was confirmed when the man in front of her spoke in a lewd manner, "Hey babe, wanna take another trip to Santa's South Pole?" It clicked for the bounty hunter. She remembered that after she got drunk, she was grinding herself against the Spartan and next thing she knew, she was in his bedroom, tearing clothes off rapidly fast. She felt sick to her stomach when she realized that, during her drunken state, she had sex with Master Chief, and now he was there for another round of N.A.F.T.A ('Nother Afternoon F***ing That Ass). Dropping the mug, she ran upstairs as fast as she possibly could. For the next 5 hours, she stood in the shower, hot water running, staring blankly at the wall, the terrible truth of her actions last night sinking in…
There was no way I was going to leave that part out. This is my first shot at a Christmas bit, so hopefully I didn't do too badly. Read, Review, and I'm still continuing this. One last chapter remains plus a story that continues this. This is LuxUmbra2012 saying, "Ja'ne".