Note: I know I'm supposed to update everyday, but work has been hectic recently...
BookJunkie: I'll try to update regularly. Shouldn't take a week in between chapters :)
Luvit: Thanks for the review! As for the summary, InvisibleBrunette and I didn't want to give anything away by saying Dick gets a new addition to the family. It brings a certain expectation that we didn't want to bring up. But we're very glad you still took the chance on this fic and hope you'll still enjoy reading this right to the end :)
It was Babs on the line, asking about Cheyenne's accident. And it felt as if a veil had lifted and the situation came crashing down on his head again as he suddenly remembered: she doesn't know yet.
"Babs, listen-" he cut her off in mid-report of how the police investigation was going, "-there's something I need to tell you. I-"
"What is it, FBW?"
He hesitated. He had already discussed - well, got lectured actually - about the baby with Damian. How hard could it be to tell your close childhood friend you had a son?
The answer was: very.
"Dick? Are you alright?" Barbara's voice snapped his attention back to the conversation.
"Oh, yeah, I'm fine..." Smooth Grayson."Um, could you stop by? I need to talk to you."
Babs agreed, promising to stop by later, and hung up.
Dick let out a long sigh, and turned his gaze to the baby, who slept contently with his little head resting on his father's shoulder. "Well kid, I've got some 'splainin' to do, huh?" The infant gave no answer. Not that he had really expected one. With another sigh, the new father made his way back to the guest- no, to Dusty's room. He had gone out to the hallway to answer the phone, still holding Dusty. For a few moments, he'd forgotten he'd been carrying his son.
There was a nest of blankets in the middle of the bed and Dick gently set Dusty down in the center. He carefully surrounded the nest with several pillows to block the baby in case he got fussy in his sleep. In lieu of a crib, he hoped this would be enough.
Mom did say I was a fussy sleeper, he thought with a rueful grin. He set the room's intercom to monitor the room before leaving. He still had to prepare himself for yet another awkward conversation.
Babs arrived half an hour later, and it was almost as awkward as when they met in civvies for the first time.
"So what did you want to talk to me about?" she asked, rolling her chair to a stop. She was smiling gently, and Dick wanted to tell her to forget it; that it was a false alarm and he just wanted to see her. He didn't want to have to ruin her happiness; to be the one to erase that smile off her beautiful face. He's done that often enough.
But he couldn't ruin Dusty's happiness either. And if he was going to raise this little boy, he was going to need help.
"Babs, I..." He ran a hand through his hair. "I don't know how to tell you..."
"Just tell it to me straight." She was still smiling. Dick wanted to take a picture and preserve that smile forever. He couldn't do it.
He was about to tell her something, anything but the baby when said infant decided to ruin his plan by squalling.
Babs' smile faded. "Dick. What was that."
He gave her a pained grin and said, "Dusty." Then he ran for his crying son.
Wayne Tower had a set of connected intercoms, so in every room Dick could listen into Dusty's room when the baby next awoke. It was a good thing he did, because when he reached the room, he found Dusty struggling against the blanket that had twined around his legs.
Dick quickly untangled the crying baby and lifted him to cry against his shoulder, hands rubbing soothing circles against the baby's back as he murmured, "It's okay, Dusty. The blanket won't hurt you. Don't be scared now."
It took a few minutes but Dusty's crying gradually weakened before stopping altogether. When Dick turned his head to look at him, Dusty was already fast asleep and drooling on his shoulder.
Guess I'll have to remember to get a napkin over my shoulder when carrying him.
Once he was sure the baby was deeply asleep, Dick set him back down on the bed and rearranged the blankets, tucking the edges underneath the pillows so it wouldn't entangle his son again. But when he turned to leave, Barbara was by the doorway.
Her face was expressionless as she wheeled her chair forward, stopping a couple of feet away from the bed. She was staring intently at the baby as if scrutinizing his every feature. Then she looked at Dick and her voice was both empty and suspicious.
"Dick. Is this what I think it is?"
Dick dropped his arms and confessed. "Barbara, this is Dusty. My son."
Her lips thinned. She nodded towards the hallway and Dick took that as a cue to leave the room. When they had entered another guest room and Dick had shut the door, Babs burst out with only one question:
"So who's the mother?"
Dick winced. Of all the questions she could have asked, she had to pick the most difficult one. But he had to give her an honest answer if only to keep a lie from biting him in the ass later. "Cheyenne Freemont."
Babs answered him with silence.
It was maybe at that moment the reality train made a stop in his brain, or the fact that he had just cradled his son for several minutes, or even just the stress of the entire situation crashing down on him, but when he saw the look of betrayal and disgust on Barbara's face, he couldn't handle it. He'd already hurt her several times over the years they'd known each other - even if he didn't mean to in some instances - but he didn't, never wanted to be the cause of the pain hidden in those green eyes.
And now he did it again, without meaning to. Now he was that pre-teen sidekick again, looking up at the older girl who was taller than him and was giving him a patronizing eye. It didn't matter if he had been training for months, or that he had more experience than she did. She was looking at him now as she did then, and finding him wanting.
And he...just...cracked.
"What, Barbara?" he snapped. "We weren't together at the time, hell, we're not together now! Did you think that I would live like a monk? That I would pine away in my little corner waiting for you to take me back? I've loved you for so long but every time I think - no, you think that we're getting somewhere you keep pushing me away. How long do you expect me to wait?" Dick panted harshly in his anger. The rage that he'd bottled up for so many months ran roughshod over his throat. Guilt raised a hand for attention but he quickly squashed that. Now wasn't the time to feel guilty. He met her green eyes glare for glare in silence before he took a deep breath, then began speaking again. "It's too late now anyway. Dusty is here, and he's my son."
He took another breath. His next words weren't shouted; they weren't even heated, nor did they hold the last vestiges of his anger. They were simply, tired. It was like his balloon burst and left him with empty air. He couldn't summon even an ounce of rage. "Either suck it up and deal, or don't," his shoulders slumped, defeated. "I honestly don't care anymore."
The baby whined in displeasure in the other room, spurring Dick out of the room.
He didn't turn around to see Babs' expression. He didn't need to. Babs' silence spoke plenty. She didn't even follow him to see what was wrong with Dusty.
The baby's eyebrows were scrunched together in a frown, his little arms flailing in the air. His blankets were rumpled but the edges were pinned safely in place. It was clear though, that Dusty needed comfort.
So Dick reached over and gently smoothed the thin hairs on Dusty's crown. He began murmuring nonsense, hoping that his voice would help his son calm down. He didn't even know what he was saying, but he kept his voice low and soothing.
Finally, the baby's arms fell back and the lines on his forehead faded into peace. Dick smiled to himself.
A quiet squeak from the hallway alerted him to Babs' leaving but he ignored it. He'd felt Babs' presence from the doorway ever since he started comforting Dusty but she didn't speak up nor make herself known. So he respected her unspoken wishes and focused all his attention on his son as she watched, like the all-seeing all-knowing Oracle on the job - just watching.