Usual disclaimers apply.
Dear Readers:
Thank you for all your encouragement, which has contributed greatly to the development of this story. The two that I am presently writing and posting are the first that have come to Fan Fiction before completion. There is a plus to this situation, of course, I am encouraged by the input from you, the readers. In addition, these have directed some of the plot twists and character choices that I have made, e.g. initially I was not planning to include a chapter where Sarek counsels Spock, but after approval of his appearance-there he was in my thoughts.
Another thing to note, it has been established in this story and so many others that Spock and Nyota are both geniuses, so my story will not really focus on their intellectual prowess, it will dwell more on their personal interaction with occasional references or visits to the classroom. It will delve deeply into Nyota's realization that a star ship captain's job is not glamorous, but full of dangers and decisions that can have ramifications lasting a lifetime.
Also, please bear in mind in this story we are dealing with teenagers with limited life experiences, and hopefully by the end of the story they will have grown.
Chapter Thirteen
When You Wish Upon A Star
What If?
In retrospect, Spock thought about the evening they had started the interview sessions, the night he had shared a meal with Nyota. He had taken her to an Asian vegetarian restaurant and discovered she was not a bashful diner; she had eaten her food with gusto - then sampled some of his own. Not knowing the significance of such an action she had allowed him to serve her. Never in his entire life had he found such pleasure in eating a meal. To a Vulcan food was necessary for continued existence, so logic dictated that one should eat. So, the truth of the matter was, the food was not the reason for his pleasure, it was the company and conversation.
Although many of the things talked about had been revealed before they had met personally, her animated delivery, gestures, smiles and vocalization added such color and warmth to the accounts. She revealed that her family had contributed much to the unification and stabilization of what is now known as The United States of Africa. Like himself, she had descended from warrior kings. Spock could relate to her account. Had not Vulcan been a place of ruthless violence, internal struggles and unbridled emotions? As she narrated the carnage visited upon that continent before its unification, Spock noticed her eyes glistened with unshed tears. This reaction he would tap into during their next session.
He made it his business to linger at the table, walk slowly back to their destination and to keep her talking after they were in front of her dormitory.
As they parted she said, "Spockh, I think if it were not for you I would be overwhelmed with homesickness. Tonight was very special to me.
"Good night my Thy'la," she continued, gently touching his clothed arm.
With her touch Spock's body reacted. Aside from the pressure of her hand on his arm, he was certain that she was unaware of the meaning of that word. Thy'la went deeper than just a friend, it was one of the closest relationships one could have with another. It could in fact be one's lover.
Once home he started planning their next scheduled session. Always in the back of his mind was his goal to create a atmosphere that would make time and distance his friends; tools he could use to his advantage. Their next meeting would take place in his apartment his door would remain ajar.
They would meet at fifteen hundred hours. He had taken the special teapot down, laid out a selection of teas, fresh fruit and Vulcan sweet cakes. This would be the second time they would share food and he was looking forward to this opportunity to again observe her as she ate.
Precisely on time the door chime signaled her arrival. Walking to the door he checked his appearance, he was casually attired and shoeless. Wisely, she had thought best to not be seen entering his residence in her Star Fleet cadet uniform, so she was dressed in civilian dress. Looking down as she entered she saw Spock's shoes by the door and removed hers also.
"Good evening Lieutenant."
"Good evening Cadet."
He said,
"It is only proper that I leave the door ajar. Despite the different location, Star Fleet's Code of Honor must be respected.
After the provided refreshments Spock took his PADD and gestured for her to sit at the table, opposite him. His questions this time would probe much more deeply than before.
She sat with one of her legs under her, she was twirling a tendril of hair between her thumb and forefinger as her hand rested against her cheek.
"Nyota, let me present this scenario,
"You are the captain of a Star Ship, your away team includes you, your science officer and one of your security team. The situation before you had been faced in a war in the twentieth century, in a place called Viet Nam. You see two young persons approaching you with innocents eyes. They cannot be more than eight years old. Since it has been documented that they could be wired with explosive, and perhaps don't even know it. What definsive action will you take, if any, your phaser is in your hand. You have the job to protect your crew. What are your orders?
She turns her face from him, her shoulders are slumped and her eyes close.
"They will only act upon my orders?"
"Yes, you are the commanding officer."
Her lips grow thin,
"Can they be stunned?"
"No."
"Then I would order them to fire."
"The youths have fallen, you approach their bodies and the security officer searched their lifeless forms and there are no explosives, they were not booby trapped. What do you say?"
"That is the job of a captain, isn't it?"
"One of the many, the job involves many levels of command, that are riddled with decisions., some of them matters of life or death. I, for one, have never desired such a responsibility," was Spock's summation.
His head was tilted as he processed that statement, he continued,
"My admission is not disgraceful, it is an admission of where I believe my talents could be best employed-in the scientific field. I follow the path that would bring me the most satisfaction and fortunately I am able to do so on a Star Ship."
Nyota sat transfixed. Unshed tears pooled in her eyes, and in a lowered voice she said,
"How do they live with the mistakes that they make?"
"It is part of their training."
"They are dehumanized?"
"No, they learn how to detach themselves from reality and compartmentalize their actions."
She nodded.
Spock noted, her complexion had paled, there is a distinct appearance of a tremor in her right hand.
"Nyota, will you allow me to present one more situation tonight?"
Again she nodded.
"The hull of your ship has been breeched, levels six through ten are compromised. In order to save the lower decks what action is necessary? Do you advise your crew of the action you will take? What will you say?
"I, I would apply the Vulcan rule, 'The needs of the many.' The compromised levels would have to be sealed off, and all essential life support systems would have to be directed to the other levels. I, would not say anything, but I…would be responsible for many deaths, some of them agonizing."
She has clasped her hands in front of her on the table. The job of captain is not what she thought, and in such a position, the life and death of many-friend or foe would be in her hands.
Spockh rose from his seat, put water up to boil and said,
"I will now prepare a calming brew, once you have drank it I will escort you home."
She looked up at him almost beseechingly, and he seated himself again.
"Nyota, now you know why The Command Track has such a high drop-out rate. There is no shame involved. It is the realization that one would prefer to sit as a passenger instead of being the one to drive the vehicle, after all, the scenery is the same. You might have observed that the number of Star Fleet female captains is relatively low. Not because they do not have the intellectual capacity, but because the thought of those heavy responsibilities weighed heavily on their psyche so they chose other paths. I could name quite a few instructors at The Academy who opted out of that program. But their identities are safe with me. I have observed that these are the most dedicated and driven instructors and most compassionate observers and listeners."
Nyota noticed that he brought two mugs of tea into the dinning area. She commented,
"You need to be calmed also?"
"Yes, I found this session highly unsettling, but, as a Vulcan, the reasons for my imbibing is vastly different from yours."
His eyes remain lowered, as he dared not raise his eyes to look at her.
This night, their walk to her dormitory was almost totally silent. At the door she raised troubled eyes and said, "Good night, my thy'la," and then disappeared up the stairs.
He would have to speak to Captain Pike about this latest turn of events. The sessions must go on, and he knew, there would be more emotional turmoil. He would plan their next session out in the open, perhaps at the beach or at a park.
.