I did mention this was going to be 20 chapters right..well the time is coming up for a dramatic finale.

MintLeafon- No death threats, if I didn't have broken thrill, then the next pair woulden't occur within the two year gap. Ryoma woulden't have had his heart broken a second time,and when he comes back for college...he woulden't have been in love with both when he saw them again and it woulden't be an ot3. So sorry peeps but it's gotta you just tricked me ,now you know the ot3 has Fuji. Oh well, vote on the poll. Who do you think the ot3 pairing is gonna be?

Animelover4ever69- Exactly, Fuji's such a sly dog isn't he. lol ;P

Chapter 17- Understanding?

The lights in the clubhouse were dimmed. The sun had begun to set, and all seemed perfect as two figures lay beneath a sakura tree. Syuusuke tilted with his back against the trunk, as Ryoma laid with his head atop Syuusuke's lap.

Ryoma looked up to watch the man before him, only to gasp at the sight of his lovers illuminated form, by the setting sun. Ryoma felt a pang of guilt, as he watched the loving smile grace his lips.'How could I have ever seen that smile as anything less than the beauty it is now? Would he hate me if he knew why I left? Does this mean i'm ready, ready to accept him again? I have to be, because I realize now that I love him so much'.

Syuusuke continuously ran his fingers through his hair, absentmindedly marveling at it's silky feel. He sat contemplating so much, trying (in vain) to understand, and stared off at nothing in particular. 'Why did he leave? Was it because he stopped loving me, if that was the case could his heart really be that fickle? Could love really mean nothing to him?'. A hand interrupted his thoughts as it caressed his cheek, marveling at it's illuminescence.

Syuusuke looked down to the younger man, as he placed his hand over his lovers, holding the hand to his cheek. They gazed into each others eyes. Golden met azure orbs, and they became entranced by one another .

Ryoma broke the connection as he sat up, still holding Syuusuke's hand(refusing to let go, under any circumstance).

"The reason I left, It was-". Ryoma seemed almost in pain trying to say this to him. Fuji not knowing what to do, he began to rub short, soothing circles onto Ryoma's back. It seemed to calm him down, as he took a deep breath of air and turned to face Fuji once more.

"My okaa-san, she died." Ryoma tore his gaze from Syuusuke and settled it on the sky above in an almost plead to the heavens as tears flowed down his cheeks. Ryoma made no attempt to wipe leaned forward to trap Ryoma's head gently within his hands, as he began to wipe away the tears with his thumbs.

"I don't understand". Ryoma smiled bitterly, not at Syuusuke's statement but at the memory that came with it.

Flashback

"Tousan, I'm going back to America. Kei-chan want's us to move in with them. He seems to be going what were going through and I can't leave him alone. I can't be in this house anymore either."

Nanjiroh stood at his son's exclamation,"I don't understand, what about your boyfriend, your just going to leave him". Ryoma stared at his father in disbelief.

"You knew."

"Of course we knew, you were so much happier with him not to mention these walls aren't exactly soundproof. Not that we really mind, I mean it's not like either of you can get pregnant." Nanjiroh contemplated as a cushion was thrown at his face.

"Uresai baka Oyaji. I ju- It's just to painfull. Looking at him, it hurts me. It's not that I don't love him, I just don't know how to love him. Without flinching every time he looks at me. Or crying every time he smiles". Ryoma knelt to the ground unable to control his body as sobs racked his throat. He seemed to calm and collect himself, before he stood abruptly.

"Plane leaves in an hour oyaji, be ready im going to pack". He stated in a thick voice. With that sentence, it was decided and in one hour they were on a plane to America.

End Flashback

"I was the one that found her, she died of an aneurism brought on by a blood clot in her heart. The doctors said, as she died, neurons fired in her head. They said it would've been like a spectacular fireworks display, in her head. She died with a smile on her lips." He tried to twist out of Syuusuke's grip to hide the shame he felt at admitting his fear.

"I tried to go back to school, but I coulden't look at you. Her finale smile continued to haunt me. So I avoided you". He returned to Fuji with pleading, golden, cat-like eyes.

"Im soo (at this point his voice broke) sorry, I love you so much but it just hurt- it hurt soo bad". He grasped Fuji's hand's urging him to understand.

"After the funeral, I was so confused. Someone rang the doorbell, and I thought it was you but it was Tezuka. I was so stupid." Fuji's eyes snapped open as he misunderstood the statement and dropped Ryoma's hands. Ryoma stared at him in disbelief, as he too realized the misinterpretation of his words.

"No Fuji, that's not what I meant." Fuji stood to leave the young man, but Ryoma woulden't let that happen, as he jumped Fuji. He glomped him in a feat worthy of Eiji, it sent both to the ground. Ryoma straddled Fuji's hips and grasped both Fuji's hands and pinned them to the ground above his head.

Ryoma leaned in closer to Fuji unconsciously rubbing against him in a very suggestive way, and whispered into the tensai's ear.

"Listen to me, let me finish, before you go on a jealous rampage. I would never cheat on you."

Fuji smiled at the proclamation.

"So are you goin to get off now." Ryoma smirked at him.

"Nope, I kinda like my position." Ryoma replied cockily but released his propped himself up by his elbows.

"As I was saying...I was so stupid, to have listened to him. I wasn't exactly in my right mind, but I didn't know how to deal with all this pain, and I didn't know how to not hurt you. Tezuka reiterated my fears to me. He asked me why I was avoiding you, he said that he could see the pain in your eyes. I told him everything." He seemed to stop lost in thought. So Fuji prompted him to continue as he slid his index finger across Ryoma's cheekbone, effectively bringing him back to the present.

"Then what happened?" Fuji inquired.

"He suggested I leave, and clear my head. So I woulden't keep hurting you, and I agreed". Ryoma stated bitterly. Ryoma lurched forward, hugging Fuji around the torso.

"I'm so sorry, please forgive me." Ryoma said as he burrowed his face into Fuji's chest. Fuji began to pat his head.

"It's been three years Ryo...what's to forgive". With that thought Ryoma fell asleep in the arms of the one he loves.