I met Edward at a little diner down the street from the hotel Jake and I were staying at in Seattle. Jake agreed to check out while I was gone and I'd meet him in the hotel lobby for our drive back to Forks. So with a nervous and empty stomach I stepped inside the diner and began looking for Edward.
He stood up immediately from a table in the middle and waved me over. He was clean shaven and wearing jeans and a t-shirt. He was adorable when he was dressed casually. I wanted to sit on a couch somewhere and snuggle with him. Shaking my head to clear it of before mentioned thoughts, I headed over to the table.
He gave me an awkward kiss on the cheek and pointed to the chair next to him. He seemed nervous. "Thanks for coming." He said, looking relieved, like he thought maybe I wouldn't show.
"I wanted to, Edward. I don't like where we left things." I said this looking at my menu and not at him, wondering how this conversation was going to. How did I want it to go?
The waitress came over and we ordered. Our menus out of the way and hot coffee set before us, we regarded each other.
He took a deep breath and began,"Bella, I'm sorry for walking out on you that night. It was wrong. I should have stayed and spent Christmas with you and my family." I was a little confused. I had assumed that he was going to apologize for kissing me. Isn't that what went wrong that night?
Seeing my confusion, he leaned across the table and added, "I'm not sorry I kissed you, Bella. It was a wake up call." He smiled a crooked smile and continued, "It was also very, very enjoyable."
Blushing, I took a big drink of my coffee and looked at him for more explanation.
"I know you don't know exactly what was going on with me that Christmas but let me try to explain. Rose and I had been dating for five years. I cared for her but it just wasn't working out. We were fighting all the time and I just couldn't understand what was going wrong. Then I kissed you." He smiled a sweet smile and held my gaze.I was now more confused than ever. "I'm not sorry I kissed you because it made me realize that my feelings for Rosalie were not as deep as they should be. I felt more during that kiss with you than I did the entire five years I dated her."
My mouth actually dropped open in astonishment. He can't be serious. "I knew then, that it was over." "So, I left you standing in the middle of the garage and flew all the way back to Seattle that night because I didn't know what to make of those feelings. I was so confused and I'm sorry. Bella, please say something." He implored me with his eyes and I know I looked like a statue.
"I...I don't quite understand. I felt really bad about the game we were playing. I mean, I was teasing you. I didn't actually think you would kiss me and when you left, I felt awful. I kissed you when you were going through something with your girlfriend and I caused you to leave your home and family on Christmas. I thought you left because you were angry with me."
Reaching across the table, he took my hand in his and stroked it lovingly. "Bella, I was shocked at the how that kiss made me feel. Even now, just touching your hand makes me so happy. I think that sometimes things just come together that way and I'd like to explore the feelings I'm having for you." He looked up to gauge my reaction. "If that's something you want as well."
I cleared my throat, feeling like I was chocking on something, trying to communicate with him. What did I want to communicate with him? "I don't know, Edward. This is very sudden and I'm still a little confused. You have feelings for me?" I blurted that last question out in disbelief, needing clarity suddenly. Wanting to make sure I wasn't sitting at this diner alone having a make believe conversation with myself.
"Yes." He answered patiently. "I know how you feel because after that kiss I wasn't ready to accept that I had feelings for you. I thought I imagined them but when I saw you last night, you looked so beautiful, by the way, and all those feelings came rushing back, even stronger than before. If you'll agree, I'd like to start seeing you, Bella, see where this might lead us. Can I call later this week?"
I sat back in my chair, at a diner in Seattle, Edward Cullen sitting next to me, holding my hand and asking me if he can call me later and telling me he has feelings for me. What kind of parallel universe did I just step into?
I was quiet the whole way home from Seattle. Jake just kept looking over at me and asking, "You sure you don't need me to kick his ass, because I will. You just say the word, Bells." I would tell him no, over and over and we'd keep driving and I'd keep looking out the window, trying hard not to forget what it felt like to have Edward Cullen hold my hand.