A/N Hope you all had a good weekend. Now, straight to it :)

Thanks to my beta, Breath-of-Twilight. She makes me not sound like so much of an idiot, and I love her for that.

Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer is a goddess and she owns all of the Twilight universe. I own the story line. Please do not steal what isn't yours. No copyright infringement intended.

8. Answers

The last show of the season was the best, by far, of the whole weekend. Rose and I couldn't believe how perfectly everything had gone. After the final curtain closed, we met with all of the dancers and let them know what a wonderful job they'd done. I couldn't remember a time when I had felt more proud of them. The looks on their faces were priceless. They had accomplished a wonderful thing. They had performed in front of three sold out crowds, seamlessly, beautifully, and confidently. There was no greater gift we could give them than the pride they felt.

Rose and I had discussed how long we would close the studio for a well deserved break. We decided that a month was sufficient time for both of us to get our personal lives back in order, and then it would be business as usual. With Rose's upcoming wedding she definitely could use some time off. I didn't want to share my issues with her because she'd worry about me. The last thing she needed was to worry about my love life.

The dancers took the news well that we would be closing. It would be the longest vacation that we'd ever taken. With everyone informed and on the same page we sent the dancers home.

My family was there waiting for me when everyone left. It was tradition that they'd come to the final show every year and we'd go to dinner afterwards. Rose and Emmett decided to come with us. They were as much our family as our own flesh and blood.

Rose and I had finally packed up all of the props and made sure everything was picked up. The last dancer had turned in her costume and we were ready to leave.

Our little group made their way to the entrance of the theatre when I noticed a man standing by himself in the middle of the empty parking lot. He must have caught sight of us the same time that I saw him because he started to walk towards us. The closer he got the more that I realized that it was Edward.

I locked the theatre doors and everyone turned and headed to their cars.

"I'll catch up with you guys." They all smiled at us, looking at me skeptically. They had no idea what had happened between Edward and me. As far as they knew, we were just fine, even though they didn't really know the extent of our relationship. They all turned towards their cars and left without another word.

Edward was finally just ten steps away when he finally stopped. He looked like he hadn't slept in days. His face was pasty and drawn. His eyes were blood shot, and it looked like he'd been crying. My heart contracted when I saw the pain in his eyes. I wanted to run to him, but the thought that he'd been with someone else hurt deeply. I wouldn't show him how much it hurt me. I did want to hear his explanation. I still hoped that it wasn't completely true.

"Edward, I think we need to…."

"Bella, do you choose him?" His interruption caught me off guard. His face hardened. He didn't bother saying who he was. We both knew he meant Felix.

"No, I don't…"

Edward interrupted me again. "No, Bella, I just want a yes or a no." His voice was hard, and sharp.

"No." I wanted to say more, but he wasn't ready to listen.

"Then can you explain to me what you were doing kissing my brother this afternoon on my front lawn?" His voice was cold and emotionless as the question came out of his mouth.

"Okay, let me get this straight. I am supposed to explain to you that your freakin' brother kissed me without my permission, and forcibly I might add. You misunderstood my struggle to get away with me being an active participant. You know you really have a lot of nerve standing here asking me these questions. I have never been anything but honest with you, which is more than I can say for you. How dare you treat me like I have done something wrong!"

He looked confused, like he had no idea what I was talking about. "Excuse me, what exactly do you think that I've done?" he asked immediately.

"I know about the others. Felix told me. He said…"

"Felix told you what exactly?" Now he looked furious. His eyes blazed and he looked like he was no longer totally present in our conversation.

"He told me that I wasn't the only one. That there have been others… recently."

"And you believed him?" His face gave nothing away to what his mood was now, but I thought I heard his voice break a little.

"I didn't want to. At first I thought that he was lying…," I hesitated.

"Have I ever given you any reason to doubt me?" Now the hurt was clear in his voice.

"Well, you're always gone. Why would Felix lie?" Why would I have believed Felix so easily?

"Bella, do you have any idea what you have done. You have trusted the one person in my life that I've tried repeatedly to get along with and just can't. You hardly know him, so I actually am trying to figure out how he was so convincing that he could make you believe that I was a liar." Anguish spread across his face. I wanted to reach out and comfort him, but I couldn't raise my arms.

Without as much as a backward glance he hung his head and turned away from me. He started towards his car and I started to panic. I wanted to scream but I couldn't find my voice.

"Wait…," the sound was barely a whisper and I was surprised it came from my mouth. "Wait…," this time the sound was choked but it was louder, and Edward stopped. He stood just twenty feet away, and the tension between us seemed to pull taught the fragile string that was strung between the two of us.

"Why, Bella, please tell me why?" he turned to face me now. "I want nothing more than to look at you and know how much you want me back. I just don't think after everything I've been through that I can take much more. But, the decision is yours whether or not I stay or I leave, it's your choice."

That declaration took me by surprise. He was going to leave if I didn't want him. The words seemed like they weren't making sense but somewhere in my brain something clicked into place. If I wasn't careful I would lose him. He had become an essential part of my life and the wrong words, actions, or hesitations could drive him away. Why was taking so long for me to react to his words?

"I want you to stay." His facial expression didn't change, and it didn't seem like he believed me. I lowered my eyes and walked toward him. I could see in my peripheral vision that he hadn't moved an inch. As I moved closer he stood there still. When I got within a foot of him I reached out and grabbed his hand. The skin was rough and callused like he had been working with his hands. He grabbed my hands in his and pulled them around his waist, making me press against his body. I could feel him bury his face in my hair and quiet sobs came from deep in his body. The sound overwhelmed me. The pain seeped out of him and absorbed into me. I could feel his possessive hold on me and that made me feel like there was some hope actually left.

In a quiet voice he said, "Can I take you somewhere we can talk?"

"Yeah, I think that would be good. Can we drop off my car first? Oh, and I think we really should go by the restaurant and make an appearance." I just wanted him to myself, but I would have to wait a little longer.

The drive home to drop off my car seemed to be endless. I parked my car in my driveway, locked up, and joined Edward in his car. As soon as I opened the door his smell enveloped me. Edward didn't look at me as we drove away, and that made me self conscious. We drove to the restaurant in silence, and the air was thick with tension.

The parking lot was full and the only spot left was at the end of the lot. Edward maneuvered the car into the little spot and got out so that he could open my door for me. He reached his hand in to assist me in getting out of the car. When his hand touched mine I felt the familiar electricity between us, and wanted to turn around and head home.

My family was seated at a huge table in the back of the restaurant. I hadn't realized how late we were until I noticed the empty plates of food.

"We wanted to wait for you, but we were so hungry, so we just went ahead and ordered two dinners for you to-go," my Mom spoke over the table. She was always thinking ahead, and I was sure she could tell that this night was not going to be spent with the family. "Actually, we were just getting ready to call you and let you know that we were going to bring food by the house and drop it off,"

"Thank you, guys, we got held up, and then I had to drop my car off. I'm really sorry that we couldn't make it on time, but thanks for thinking of us." I could tell that my Mom was trying to maneuver out of her chair so that we wouldn't sit down.

"Oh yeah, we paid already, and were just getting ready to leave. Bella, I'll call you tomorrow." She was definitely trying to get us to leave. She handed us our to-go containers and opened her arms to guide us out of the restaurant. I waved at the rest of the family as we left, and found myself back in Edward's car.

"That was strange," Edward said. "I expected that the first time that I met your family would have gone down a little differently."

I'd forgotten that I hadn't even had a chance to introduce my family to Edward yet. I glanced at him out of the corner of my eye, watching him as he returned to driving. I was thinking about my family and how happy I would be to have Edward share in the experience of hanging out with me and my family when we pulled into his driveway.

"Do you want to come to my house or go to yours?" I hoped that he would say mine since the last time that I'd been to his house was less than a happy experience.

"I think that your house would be fine." He had no expression on his face as he spoke for me to even gauge what kind of mood he was in. He came around the car and put his arm around me, guiding me into the house.

There were no lights on in my house, and the cat was no where in sight. I went into the living room and turned on the table lamp so that the light wasn't too bright.

I heard the door lock from the hallway and the food bag being placed on the counter. I sat down on the couch in the living room waiting for Edward to join me. He sat down next to me with his legs touching mine. He turned towards me, and leaned to take me into his arms. I could feel his breath close to my ear and warmth started to fill my body. He pulled back again to look into my eyes. His eyes looked as if they were filled with sadness, but the bright green was beautiful.

"Do you like it when I get close to you?" Before I knew what he was doing, he took my face in his hands so that I couldn't look away from him. "You just have no idea do you?" he whispered.

"No idea about what?" The sound of his voice was so enticing that he could have told me to do anything and I would have acquiesced.

"That you were mine before you met me." In the next second his mouth was on mine. I suddenly lost all control of myself. His kisses were so intense that I was losing my mind. His tongue touched mine, and he tasted so sweet. I ran my fingers into his hair so that I could make sure he didn't pull away. His hands were around my waist, pulling me closer to him. My hands slid to the buttons on his shirt. He broke the kiss to look into my eyes.

"Do you really want this? Will you regret this decision tomorrow?" he asked concerned.

The things he was saying weren't making any sense to me; my head was completely clouded with him.

"Bella, I need to know if this is what you want," again with the concern.

"Ah, of course I want this, why wouldn't I?" Every feeling in my body told me that this was right. This moment was meant to happen for us. He was meant for me.

"I should go; I knew this was too much right now, I….." he ran his hands through his hair and bowed his head.

"Please, don't go. You don't want me?" I realized I was still trying to cling to him. I couldn't help myself as I looked into his eyes. They still looked so sad like he was broken. I let go of him and sat back to give him space. I looked at my hands and then back at him. He sat so still looking right through me. I would have given anything to know what he was thinking.

"Say something, Edward," the silence was killing me. I was grasping at straws just to get the conversation going again.

"Can you tell me a little more about your photography?" trying desperately to change the subject. I hoped that this would offer enough distraction for the both of us. Truthfully, I just wanted to make this time with him last longer because he seemed so uncertain about something.

"What would you like to know?" His face still held the same vacant expression.

"Well, for starters, what inspires you to take the pictures of those people you have framed?"

He thought about my question for a moment, seeming to be thinking about how he wanted to explain it to me.

"Well, I guess the way they connect to each other. I see them as kindred souls or soul mates if you will. You can just look at them and see that deep connection. It definitely makes for a fabulous photograph. I would love to photograph you some day, would you let me do that?"

"I guess, although I am sure that there are more perfect subjects for you."

"To me, you are perfect." His eyes looked into mine and straight on through to my soul.

The way he said that, made my stomach do a flip flop. I couldn't help myself. I leaned in again, but this time I wanted to make sure we wouldn't stop. I felt compelled to say something because the tension was killing me. In the only voice that I could muster, "I wanted to tell you that I have never felt anything more right in my life than being with you," but it was barely more than a whisper.

"You feel right with me?" He sounded like he was genuinely surprised. After the time that we spent together the one thing that I knew we both couldn't deny was that this felt perfect, necessary, and essential.

"I think that it's in your eyes, they make me feel so at home. I could get lost in them. Can I ask you something? I mean, I don't think that I ever asked why you are really here again, honestly." I might not want to really know that answer, but I felt an obligation to myself to ask.

"I could tell you, but it wouldn't make much sense to you. I've run it through my head time and time again, and most of it still makes little sense to me. I didn't even really understand until I first saw you. I really didn't expect to feel the things that I feel when I'm around you. I validated that this evening. I had hoped that it affected you in the same way as me, but by the way you're acting tonight I don't have any doubts." He was so cryptic, and I hoped one day it would all make sense.

I couldn't take it anymore, I had to touch him. I grabbed his face and stared into his eyes again. I wanted this moment to last forever. I kissed him on his forehead, the bridge of his nose, the left cheek, the right cheek, and then on his perfect mouth. The kiss was softer this time, less urgent. He wrapped his arms around me and lifted me off of the couch. He started to ascend the stairs. We reached the top of the stairs and he turned into my bedroom. The light from the moon came through the window above my bed and lit everything with its blue tones.

He set me down gently on the bed, being careful to never break his hold on me. He rose and looked down at me. Without ever taking his eyes from mine he started to unbutton his shirt. I could start to see his muscular chest and the light patch of chest hair that dusted it. He reached the last button and slid the shirt from his arms. He had muscles in places that I didn't know existed, and as I gazed over him they stretched taught from his chest to his stomach. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him. He reached for the buttons on his pants and slowly unsnapped them. When his pants hit the floor I was not prepared for what I saw. He was the largest man that I had ever seen, and his legs were muscular and long.

When he reached for my clothes he took great care with them, but without any effort at all they were off in a second. He stood there looking at me lying on the bed and I couldn't breathe.

"Bella, you are so beautiful." Butterflies fluttered in my stomach. He ran his hands up my legs, and grabbed my hips and pulled me towards him. He leaned down and slowly kissed from my stomach up to my mouth. His kiss was urgent, and his hands became wild touching and caressing me.

His hand slid between our bodies down to the soft flesh between my legs. He slowly caressed me and slowly entered me with one of his long fingers. If he hadn't had his mouth over mine I would have screamed. He was an expert at this. His mouth knew exactly how to kiss, and his hands knew exactly where and how to touch. I could feel his finger inside me and the pressure that he was building was exquisite. I wanted to touch every last inch of him. He was like a drug, and I was his addict. One taste and all I wanted was more.

He pulled away from me again, but this time he took his hand with him. His eyes bore into mine and I was mesmerized. He pulled me so that my legs wrapped around his waist, and he entered me in one smooth stroke. I could feel the moment when we were one, and there was nothing in the world like that feeling. The long, lean plains of his body were against mine, and we moved together in unison. Stroke for stroke he was building more pressure in me until I started to feel like I would crack into a million pieces. I couldn't imagine a more perfect man than him. It was as if we were made together as one and then had to be cut into two separate entities.

He took great care when he touched me, but I could feel that he was starting to lose control. He moved faster and deeper with every movement. The pressure built into an explosion that sent sparks all over my body and I clung to him as though my very life depended on it. I could feel him shake above me with his release and then he stilled and pulled away to look at me again. In that moment I saw pain flash across his face.

"Am I doing something that upsets you?" Clearly I had done something to bring on the pain.

"Never, why would you think that?" He was confused and a little breathless.

"You seem to be upset when you look at me, and I feel like I'm doing something that hurts you," I tried to keep the worry out of my voice.

"You could never do anything to hurt me. I don't deserve you, nor do I deserve what you continue giving me. If I seem upset it would only be because I'm not worthy of you."

I could see the pain more clearly now. This time it cut so deep that his expression seemed to freeze that way. I could hardly bear to look at him like that. I reached for him and held him close. The last thing that I wanted to do was let this moment end.

"What do you mean that you aren't worthy of me? How could you even think that? As far as I'm concerned we're even in every way, well, not every way, but you know what I mean. You don't even know enough about me to make that assumption. Please, please stop thinking like that. I couldn't bear the thought that I hurt you in any way."

He pressed his lips urgently into mine. All I could think was how this man had forever changed my life when the fire erupted between our bodies again, and that was the last coherent thought I had.

It was still dark outside the room when I woke up. I suddenly realized I wasn't alone in my room. I could see him silhouetted in the moonlight at the window. He was staring outside with a pensive look on his face. I just wanted to lay there and watch him. He must have realized that I was awake because he turned to look at me and smiled. He turned away again and shifted like he was getting ready to leave. I was sudden overcome with panic. My breathing sped up, and my heart was racing.

"Please, don't leave," I was frantic to keep him with me.

He walked to sit on the bed and pulled me into his arms like I was a child.

"I'm not going anywhere right now. Shhhhh, I'm right here," he said in his smooth voice.

I don't know where the feeling came from, but as soon as he spoke I felt better. I curled into a little ball on his lap, and snuggled into his chest.

"Can I ask you something, and I need you to promise me that you won't get offended?" I could hear the stress in his voice.

"Of course, anything you want to know."

He hesitated before he said, "Do you have experiences like this often?"

It took me a moment to understand what he was asking me.

"No, I don't. This is really the only time I have ever lost control of myself and gave into what I really wanted. There is something about you I just can't put my finger on. I feel more comfortable with you than I ever did with Riley, and I was with him for five years. You're so familiar to me, yet, I know I haven't ever met you before you moved in next door... I feel like I actually have more to worry about with you than you would ever have to worry about with me.

"When I look in your eyes I feel like you are keeping a secret from me. Like I'm the only one who is being kept in the dark about something I should know.

"I sound like I'm crazy. I know what I want to say, and how I want to articulate it but I feel like I can't express it so that you'd understand." This was not the line of question that one hopes for after a spent night of intense love making. I felt the need to really share how I was feeling.

"I have so many things that I want to tell you, I just don't know how to say them. I could say that you do know me, in fact, better than you know anyone else. I could tell you secrets, but I would be afraid that you wouldn't believe them. I know so many things that I want to share with you, but I still need time. Time is the one thing that I don't have much of. I want to ask you to trust me, and agree to spend some time with me. I want to earn that trust. You have already given me a gift that I am not worthy of, but they are your gifts to give." Edward sounded so sincere, but he wasn't making any sense to me.

"Please don't… You're sounding like you regret being with me and I can't take this back. Edward, I think that I may be in too far, and I don't think I could bear it if you decided that you couldn't do this…" I could feel the lump of fear rise in my throat.

"Don't ever think I regret one moment that I've spent with you. I will never regret anything with you. I just want to hold you." With that he slid us under the sheets and we snuggled closer together. There was nothing left to say for the moment. Both he and I knew that this would not be the last time that we would approach the subject of our unimaginable bond.

It wasn't but a few moments later when I could here his breathing even out and I slipped into a dreamless sleep.

The sun was shining and warm on my skin even though it was cold outside. The down comforter was so warm and fluffy, like the dream that I had the night before. I dreamt of Edward. That he was with me and I was so happy, happier than I had been in a long time. I couldn't place when I had initially lost that happiness, but the thought of Edward brought joy that I had never experienced in my life.

The coarse hair of a very long muscular leg brought me out of my sleepy thoughts. The rush of memories that had actually occurred came flooding back to my mind in exquisite detail. I rolled onto my side but couldn't see Edward for the fluff of the duvet cover. I ran my hand up his leg and over his hip until I could feel stomach beneath my hand. He let out a quiet moan and rolled towards me. His hands pushed the duvet out of the way and reached for my face. His mouth came down on mine claiming his stake on my heart. He tasted so sweet in the morning. I wanted it to be like this forever. I just wanted to make love and hide out in this room with him.

"Good morning, beautiful." He smiled at me and kissed my forehead.

"Good morning, how'd you sleep?" I couldn't help but worry if I had snored or talked in my sleep.

"Fantastic, actually, I don't think I've slept that well since I moved here. Although, I think that I have you to thank for that. I also don't think that I have exerted that much energy in a long time. Plus, I wanted to watch you to sleep. I could watch you sleep for hours. It's so peaceful, but at the same time quite erotic to watch you breathe and the little noises that you make." He touched the spots on my face where I knew that the color had risen from embarrassment.

"Noises, what kind of noises?" My defensive tone made him smile.

"Sweet little sighs, moans, and whimpers. I'm surprised that you didn't wake up from my kisses. I just couldn't help myself. Your lips had me entranced." I was amazed at how his words affected me.

Without thinking I broke into tears. I bent my head away from him so that he couldn't see my silent sobs. I felt like I was committing the ultimate betrayal of Riley. We weren't together but here I was, ridiculously happy in the arms of another man, and so quickly after Riley left. Part of me was ashamed while the other sang to the roof tops. I just hadn't expected to be intimate with someone so quickly.

"Bella, what is it? Did I say something?" He tried to pull me close but I didn't want to budge.

"No, you didn't do anything, it's me. I'm laying here with the man of my dreams, the man that will now forever be the one that I compare everyone to. I feel like I have betrayed Riley in some way.

"I don't know why, it's not like it really matters, but I just wonder how I could have spent five years of my life with someone that never made me feel the way that you do? I feel like I have been unfair to both him and me, and then there's that part where I bounced back so quickly. It's like those five years never existed.

"Where were you all of my life? I feel like I was a sinking ship and you saved me from drowning." I looked at him through my tear fill eyes and wondered what he could be thinking.

He just looked at me, and I could see myself reflected in the deep green pools of his eyes. He smiled at me and then pulled me back into his arms. "Sweet, Bella, I'm here now, that's all that matters. At least, that's all that matters to me. I don't think you know how special you are to me.

"I feel like all of my life has led me to you. Like I was searching for you and now that we're together I never want to let you go.

"I just want to hold you here, and keep you safe and as close to me as possible."

"Is that what you were thinking about last night?" I hoped that that was what he was thinking. I didn't even want to ponder what else it could've been.

He looked at me and the smile left his face. "I wasn't thinking about anything, actually. I think this just is a little overwhelming, that's all."

That sounded like he wasn't telling me everything, but I didn't want to pry. This moment was one of the best that I had ever had and I just wanted to be with him.

Four hours later we crawled out of my room back into the real world. We had to eat, and a shower was definitely called for. I couldn't remember a time that I was this deliriously happy. I still felt guilty about Riley, but there was starting to be no comparison. Edward had a way of making me forget even myself.

I went to the kitchen while Edward was upstairs taking a shower. I decided that I really wasn't in the mood to cook so I pulled out the phone book and decided to order pizza.

I had an hour before they were going to deliver the pizza, so I went back upstairs so that I could shower. I opened the door to the bathroom, and Edward was still showering. I turned to leave to give him a private moment, when his arm came out of the shower and beckoned me over.

"Bella, come here for a minute." His arm disappeared back into the shower

I closed the door and went to the shower. Edward threw back the curtain and pulled me into the shower with him.

I still had my clothes on but he was gloriously naked. I didn't think that I would ever get tired of seeing him that way.