Old Habits

"Again, I feel pretty bad bringing you out here so soon-"

"It's not a problem, Amodar," Lightning spoke into the communication device held between her cheek and shoulder as she closed the door to her home and placed the rather large duffel bag in her other hand on the porch near the stairs, "You know me, too much quiet makes me restless."

"I know you still don't know how to take it easy, Farron—you've gotten better but you could stand to relax a little more."

"Says the man who called me back in during the middle of my leave." Lightning retorted half-jokingly. Her former superior office chuckled on the other end of the line. Now with a free hand, the pinkette grasped the comm. device and pulled it over to her other ear.

"I wouldn't have called you out if I didn't think it were completely necessary."

"I know." Lightning voiced in unnecessary agreement at the serious tone now in Amodar's voice. She heard a separate voice in the background, followed by Amodar's affirmative response to whoever it belonged to.

"Just got word from the shuttle, it should be arriving in Oerba Neo any minute now."

"Right." Lightning, "Heading out."

"See you when you get here, Farron—and please, no taking over the shuttle to get here faster, unless you feel like training another pilot..."

"You're never going to let that go, are you?" Lightning rubbed one of her temples, making a face at the memory she'd have rather forgotten as Amodar let out a hearty laugh.

"You pretty much traumatized that poor boy, Farron. And let's not forget what you managed to do to the shuttle, I can't say I've ever seen metal bend that way-"

"I was young and stupid, Amodar." Lightning defended half-heartedly. It was the truth but it didn't make her feel any less shame, "I promise, no hijacking."

"Good. Well I'll let you go, the Council is meeting in a few."

"Alright, say hello to Bartholomew for me."

"Will do."

With a small click, Lightning closed the comm. device and slipped it in her pocket. Having found herself leaning against the porch railing, facing the house, she caught herself in one of the windows. Young and stupid. The phrase re-entered her mind as she took in her reflection.

By her appearance, one would probably find it difficult to believe she was 31. While still in the military, Lightning saw significantly less action in the recent years but it didn't mean she'd not kept up with her own training. Additionally, since she'd taken up swimming, her body had changed slightly. While in her younger years she'd been built for speed—retaining a softness in her frame—now her body was taught, even more toned. She had… hardened—if one had to pick a single word to describe the change. Yes, time had not been terrible to Lightning. She hardly looked like she'd aged at all during the past decade—other than perhaps the hint of crow's feet at the edge of the brilliant blue eye that wasn't covered by the protective eye patch.

Eye patch. The pinkette raised her hand to trace the skin around it. Young and stupid indeed-

"Ah great! I thought I'd missed you." A voice from behind caught her attention. Lightning turned to find Sazh walking towards her along the path leading to her porch steps, "Just leaving, I see?"

"Yes." Lightning nodded as she moved to grab her duffel, swinging it over her shoulder and making her way towards Sazh. He didn't bother asking to take her bag. Why bother asking something you knew the answer to? And there was no doubt in his mind that Lightning's answer would most definitely have been 'no'.

"Mind if I walk with you?"

"Not at all." Lightning shook her head as the two of them began walking the path towards the edge of Oerba Neo. It was barely a walk since Lightning had chosen the home nearest the edge of the village to take up residence in.

"How long are you gone for this time?" The ex-pilot asked.

"Not sure, I wasn't given a lot of details." Lightning informed with a small shrug, "I figured since it was Amodar it was something important and probably better to be discussed in person."

"Hmmm." Sazh hummed in acknowledgment.

It had been 10 years and Lightning was still never completely comfortable talking with Sazh. It had been easier to avoid topics of conversation with the others. Even Serah was easier to deal with—she could just play the older sister card. It's not as if she really had anything to hide but Sazh had an uncanny way of extracting the truth out of people that even they hadn't recognized or accepted.

"I heard you were going on a fishing trip with the children." Lightning spoke to fill the silence.

"Yeah, figured we'd take one before it got too cold." Sazh explained, "Can't say the kids won't be disappointed that their Auntie Claire can't make it."

"I'm sorry."

"I know you are, Claire-" Oh here it comes. Lightning actually felt her body tense at the promise of a 'but' in his sentence, "But don't you think you're a little old to be avoiding things by running away?"

"Did you just call me old?" Lightning quipped—half serious, half covering. The ex-pilot chuckled but his voice remained somber.

"You know that's not what I meant, Claire." Lightning allowed herself to glance over at him. His eyes were on the ground in front of him, his hands had moved to bury themselves in the pockets of his coat. His well-aged features showed an expression of worry that Lightning rarely saw anymore. While she'd previously had either ignored it or yelled him out about it, she actually felt a appreciation for the man that acted as the father of her family.

"It's been almost exactly 10 years huh?" She spoke, confirming what his voice seemed to be implying, "Sazh, I'm not running off to avoid the fact that it's coming up to the 10 year mark of the crystallization of Cocoon."

Yet it's always 'the crystallization of Cocoon' when you talk about it—you never mention their names. While Sazh always found it best to speak the truth, it did not mean he didn't know when to hold his tongue. And he couldn't deny that the soldier had come a long way since then.

In years previous, she had refused to talk about it—with anyone—to the point of almost denying it had happened. She'd buried herself in her grief and it had proven to be devastating. His eyes flashed to the protective patch over Lightning's right eye. But slowly, she had started to heal. She allowed herself to be comforted—to a extent—and gradually she let go of enough grief to be able to talk a little about her pain.

Lightning, who had been observing the thoughtful look on Sazh's face out the corner of her eye, sighed heavily. Having half her vision didn't at all hinder her ability to notice the smallest things. She hadn't failed to catch Sazh throwing a glance at her eye patch. The pinkette figured she'd have gotten used to it now; the eggshells that seemed to appear around her this particular time of year. Yes, she had gotten more comfortable sharing with others but that didn't make her a share-bear willing to spill her heart and soul. No, that just wasn't in her nature—it never would be. And like how she was learning to be more open, the others would just have to learn to accept it.

Turning one last corner on the path, Lightning and Sazh were greeted by the small shuttle grounded on the Oerba Neo docking pad.

"Oh, before I forget… if you get a chance to see Dajh…" Sazh began but trailed off. Lightning looked over at him. While Sazh's personality didn't exactly radiate sugar and rainbows, he was generally positive in his outlook of things. Which is why the present dark look on his face was enough to have Lightning place a comforting hand on his shoulder.

"I'll give him your regards." She accepted his unspoken request with a reassuring squeeze of her hand.

"Well, don't be a stranger, y'hear?" The older man said, a warm smile replacing the slight frown on his face.

"I won't." Lightning assured him sincerely before giving a small wave and continuing towards the shuttle. There was no awkward moment of deciding whether or not to hug. Lightning was not a hugger, nor was she one to spend longer than necessary on goodbyes—Sazh knew this. His ability to see through most—if not all—of Lightning's actions had both it's good and bad sides. While he was usually the first to call her on her untruthfulness, he also knew when not to push it and back off. The soldier was somewhat grateful for this.

With one last look at the man waving from the edge of the landing pad, Lighting slipped into the shuttle, dropping her duffel on one of the nearest seats and taking the window seat next to it. As the shuttle silently rose from the landing pad she estimated the travel time to be around 20 or so minutes give or take. As she was pulled away from the ground and eventually from Oerba Neo her eye drifted toward her destination. It wasn't hard to miss—being located right under a giant sphere the size of a moon, perched upon a crystal pillar.

Crystallinus. The Crystal City. Still relatively small yet ever-expanding, the city looked as though it were just a extension of the crystal mass that supported the now-unoccupied Cocoon. Built from a cross between salvaged remnants of the humans' past world and new energy and material provided by the crystal; Crystallinus was the pride and joy of what was left of the Sanctum's Guardian Corps. Even in the morning, where no light but the one from the sun was needed, the city sparkled. It glimmered like a gem among the natural, rough, crude terrain of Gran Pulse.

Being somewhat involved in the creation and growth of Crystallinus, Lightning had developed a sense of pride whenever she had the chance to take in the Crystal City as a whole, from a distance. A city built entirely by humans; not handed to them then controlled by a higher being like in the past.

However, as the shuttle continued flying smoothly towards the gleaming expanse, the pinkette was reminded of something she'd observed in the more recent years. While the founders and inhabitants of Crystallinus built it with every intention to make Gran Pulse their new home, Lightning couldn't help but notice how much the city of crystal had begun to remind her of Eden, Cocoon's capital.

A/N:

I own nothing from FFXIII. I just like to play with the characters.

To say this chapter was a pain to complete... would be an understatement =_=;;
Had it all planned out but nooooo, the moment I try and write a proper chapter out of it... ugh
I'm still not sure whether I'm happy with it or not but if I put off uploading any longer it'd just keep sitting on my computer gathering pixel-dust =\
SO... yes. And before all of the "but why this"s and "but why that"s -it's the second chapter _ gimmie a break, yeah?