Chapter 5

It was the right thing to do, Jane told herself. Maura was in no condition to drive and she wasn't the kind of woman you offered your pizza and beer stained couch to. Jane wondered if Maura had ever slept on a couch in her life. Maybe. One with big fancy cushions filled with the wool of free-range Himalayan sheep and put together by the monks of-

"Can't sleep?" Maura asked quietly.

"Huh? No. I mean, yes. I mean, I can," she stammered. "Just not used to all the vino." Jesus, what was wrong with her? She stared at the popcorn on her ceiling.

"I can take the couch if this makes you uncomfortable."

"It doesn't," she scoffed, more defensively than she'd meant.

Sensing where Jane's mind had gone, Maura elaborated. "Humans are creatures of habit. Perhaps you sleep diagonally or like to take up the entire bed?" Even in the darkness, Jane could see the teasing quirk of Maura's eyebrow. The slight upturn of her lips. "If my being here disrupts your routine, I assure you I can sleep just as well on your couch."

For some reason, that was the last place Jane wanted her.

She was being stupid. It's not like this was the first time she'd ever shared her bed with another girl. She turned on her side, roughly adjusting the pillow under her head, and forced herself to look over.

Maura Isles was a beautiful woman. Some days she was even breathtaking. And in Jane's bed, wearing Jane's old Patriots tee and a pair of her worn out sweat shorts, she was dangerously appealing. Jane swallowed and considered putting herself on the couch - for both their sakes.

"You're fine," she squeaked out. "Wine always makes me a little...um..." Horny. "I'm more of a beer gal."

Maura blinked sleepily.

"Thank you for letting me stay, for everything…" she said, her voice thick from the two bottles of merlot they had shared. She slid her hand across the small space between them and touched Jane's arm. "I can't remember the last time I've enjoyed an evening more. I'm so happy we've developed a friendship, Jane."

"Me too," Jane said and Maura's drowsy expression blossomed into a shy smile which Jane couldn't help but return. "Me too."

In the morning, Jane woke first and not caring what it meant, watched Maura sleep until the alarm went off.

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She ran her hand lightly down Maura's cheek, all the way down to her shoulder and shook gently.

"Maur. Hey Maur, can you hear me?" Save for the slow rise and fall of her chest, she was completely motionless. Jane tried again, more forcefully this time.

"Maura."

Her head faintly wobbled and lolled to one side.

"I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to do that," Frankie said.

Jane placed both her hands on the bed they'd carried Maura to and looked at him, irritated.

"Why didn't you tell me she was here? This whole time!"

"Um, because I know you."

"Then I don't have to tell you how pissed off I am. And what the hell is that supposed to mean anyway?"

He sighed and crossed his arms, making clear the implication she should damn well already know the answer.

"What!" Jane demanded.

"Okay, I'll admit that at first I thought it might be nice to, you know, surprise you-"

"Yea, fantastic job with that," she interrupted, gesturing to Maura's supine form for emphasis.

"And then I realized you're still the same stubborn ass you always were, and it would be better for everyone if you didn't know," he finished.

Jane's face puckered into a mix of confusion and offense.

"If you knew she was here, alive, what would you have done the second we got off that truck?" he asked.

Her indignation withered away. Well, shit.

Without a doubt, Jane would have torn the place apart trying to get to Maura. Her eyes shifted to the side and she adjusted her stance, then looked back at him. Boy was he satisfied with himself.

"Fine," she conceded and he grinned triumphantly.

Her eyes drifted back down to Maura. The blonde hair was a touch darker than Jane remembered. She shamefully realized for the first time that Maura had probably been highlighting her hair ever since they'd met. Always one to appear so put together, not a trace of make-up touched her face now. The light freckling Jane sometimes saw during their sleepovers was now exposed for anyone to appreciate. She found herself strangely possessive of them.

A stray lock of hair hung loose over Maura's forehead and Jane gently tucked it away. She didn't care that she looked entirely love-struck, and if Frankie was at all discomfited by her affection, he didn't show it.

"For what it's worth, I am sorry," he added. "I wanted to tell you."

"I understand why you didn't."

"I had no idea she'd pass out like this."

Jane smiled fondly. "She's sensitive about certain things. This is a woman who fainted one time because she cheated on her homework."

Frankie chuckled.

The corner of Maura's mouth twitched as she began to stir. The starchy bed sheets crinkled, protesting her movements.

"Maura?"

"No..." she murmured.

"It's me, Maur." Jane tried but couldn't quite tame the joy spreading over her face.

"No...no," she continued.

"It's okay. It's Jane."

Flecked hazel eyes blinked open and Jane unconsciously leaned forward, wanting so badly to feel a connection. Maura brought her hand to Jane's face, running her thumb along the sharp cheekbone there. Still disoriented, she blinked a few times more.

"Jane?"

"Hey," she choked out.

"I would never..." she swallowed. "I lied about finishing my homework. I didn't cheat," she corrected sweetly.

It was so perfect. So Maura.

And just like that, Jane fell over whatever ledge she was teetering on and brought Maura up into her arms. It was all at once familiar and unfamiliar. She felt lighter than Jane expected. Warm. Like so many times before, Maura's arms found their place around her neck, sealing them together, and bringing Jane home. Gone was the light fragrance of expensive perfume, replaced instead by a clean, shower-fresh smell. Different but still Maura.

Jane was suddenly aware of how completely opposite this particular experience might be for the other woman.

"Are you okay?" She asked, the question muffled slightly by Maura's neck.

Maura cried gently, the words not coming. She managed to nod her response enthusiastically.

Jane smiled. "I bet I smell horrible, huh?"

A small pause as she considered her response - then she nodded again, a bit more hesitantly. Maura couldn't even gesture a lie.

Slightly mortified and slightly amused, Jane loosened their embrace only to be denied by the arms encircling her neck.

So she tried again with words, "I thought I'd never see you again."

This time, Maura did pull back and held Jane's face in her hands. Her teary eyes studied Jane's features as if committing them to memory all over again.

"I don't understand. You died," she said weakly. "You died..." Maura closed her eyes, the memory of that day flooding back. "The hospital was destroyed by federal order. The infestation too massive to counter…" Her words faded away as she tried to make sense of the past.

That explained the rubble Jane would find not fifteen feet from her room. The portion of the wing that housed her bed had somehow remained standing. Everything else lay in ruins.

"Well, they missed," she shrugged. Her low voice drew Maura back to the present and the easy, reassuring smile Jane gave to her felt like second nature. "Lucky me."

Maura rewarded Jane with a small smile of her own. She slid her hands down to the other woman's shoulders. Even under her light touch she discerned a troubling tightness in the muscles there.

"Jane, how did you get here?"

Frankie cleared his throat and Maura jumped.

"Oh my goodness! Frankie," she said, her hand over her heart. "I didn't know you were here."

"I…noticed that," he said. He looked awkwardly from Maura to his sister and then back to Maura. "Sorry to have to interrupt." He handed her a cup of water which she accepted gratefully. "Some rotters were spotted in the area this morning. We found Jane while sweeping the east quadrant."

"That is quite fortuitous," she remarked. It was almost unbelievable.

"Mmm hmm, quite," Jane said, distracted, fingering the stethoscope that still hung on Maura's neck. "Are you a doctor now? Like a doctor doctor?" She turned the circular piece in her fingers. Why were these things always so cold? "Like a people doctor?"

Maura watched Jane fidget curiously with the chest piece dangling over her heart. The shiny metal stood out in stark contrast to the strong, smudged hand that held it. When Jane stopped and raised her eyebrow, Maura realized she had been staring.

"Yes. Yes, I serve as a physician now. Here on the base," she said. Maura couldn't decipher the expression on Jane's face and began to ramble. "Of course, I wasn't able to obtain an actual degree - that would be impossible given the total collapse of our educational system. I had my reservations, but the lack of other qualified individuals in the population made it necessary for me to 'step up' so to speak." She straightened her posture and continued. "I studied every medical textbook and journal I could find. I also have a bit of experience from my volunteer work in Doctors Without Borders to draw upon. With the assistance of the only other doctor we have on the compound, I feel that I've been able to perform the duties sufficiently."

Jane never stopped smiling and looked at her in that way no one else did. It always made Maura feel positively charming versus failingly odd.

Jane released the stethoscope and it bumped gently against her sternum.

"So what you're saying is you're still a genius?" she said and Maura blushed lightly. "I think that's great, Maur."

"Better than great," Frankie chimed in. "Doc's been incredible. I can't tell you how many of the guys she's patched up since we got here."

"None of the injuries were serious," Maura said, brushing off the compliment.

"Yea yea yea," he said and then got to the point. "Look, I know you both have a lot of catching up to do, but Jane still needs her evaluation before..."

Maura nodded, wiping the tears from her cheeks. "Right. Of course. I can-"

"You feeling up to it? You want me to find Sal?"

"Don't be ridiculous," she waved off his concern. "I'm fine if not a little embarrassed. Besides, Dr. Bennett is out on a supply run. He won't be back for hours."

"Wait, what's going on?" Jane asked, confused.

"It's similar to getting a physical but less in-depth," Maura clarified.

"Okay…" The idea of getting poked and prodded, even if it was Maura, did not appeal to her. "And why is this necessary again?"

"Standard procedure for all new intakes. We have to make sure you have no serious injuries or illnesses."

"Make sure people haven't been bit," Frankie said.

"And that," Maura agreed. She swung her legs around to hop off the bed but a protesting Jane stalled her progress.

"But I haven't been bitten, you both know this," Jane said.

"I can't possibly confirm that diagnosis until I examine you."

"Maura," she huffed. "Come on."

"It's no big deal, just get it over with," Frankie argued.

"If it's no big deal then I can skip it," she countered back.

"Jane really, you're being childish," Maura insisted. It had always required a ridiculous amount of coercion for Jane to do her yearly physicals.

"I'm your sister. Can't you hook me up with some kind of exception?"

"Jane, on a scale of one to important I'm just a grunt."

"I guess some things never change," Jane smarted off.

"Hey!"

"Hook up? As in sexual intercourse?" Maura asked, brow furrowed. She said it out loud but was clearly processing the confusion in her own mind.

"What?" They both spat out in unison.

"No, Maur..." Jane covered her cringing face with her hand. "I said 'hook me up' not 'hook up.' It's...they're different," she groaned.

"Ahhh," she said, the light bulb blinking to life over her head. "You see how I confused the idioms just now."

Jane patted Maura on the knee, her face twisted good-naturedly with disgust.

"Yes, honey, we see that."

Frankie started to giggle uncontrollably. Jane shot him a withering glance, but it was half-hearted at best. She couldn't keep her own laughter from bubbling to the surface and soon they were both rolling like children.

If there was a joke, Maura was sure she had missed it by a mile. It wouldn't be the first time. She smiled beautifully at Jane. "I said something funny? Or you're laughing at me?"

"Oh man," Jane wheezed between gulps of air. "No no, you're perfect. Just...this is..." she took a deep breath, trying to come down from the hysteria. It didn't help that Frankie had keeled over, still in fits. She was breathing hard, her stomach on the verge of cramping.

The moment was so blissfully normal. Jane would have given anything to stay in it forever.

"Jane?" Maura asked, amused.

Jane sobered somewhat, her eyes moist with emotion. The toothy grin of her laughter eased into a calm smile. She bent forward to rest her forehead against Maura's and a single tear leaked out from beneath her eyelids.

"It's just..." She took another shaky breath. "God, I missed you so much."

Jane was the first "touchy-feely" friend that Maura ever had. In the beginning it had taken some adjustment on her part, but she adapted quickly to Jane's seemingly random touches. As time went on, Maura determined that given the frequency and the nature of Jane's physical contact with her, it might not be random at all. Yet without actual numbers or hard evidence, she was unwilling to make anything of it.

Now, she was achingly aware of their close proximity - Jane standing between her knees, hands resting on her thighs; the warm pressure of Jane's palms transferring through the thin material and into Maura's skin. She was overcome with the need to kiss her and barely resisted the urge. If they were alone, she might not have.

Jane tensed suddenly and a small part of Maura panicked, sure that she had somehow given herself away.

"Someone's coming," Jane said. She pulled away from Maura, her face set with concentration.

Maura listened but heard only silence until the swinging doors behind Jane swished open. The sharp sound of dress shoes striking the linoleum reverberated through the room.

Frankie looked up. "Aw shit," he mumbled and glanced quickly at the back of Maura's head.

Jane could feel Maura squeezing her forearm and she looked over her shoulder.

In her weaker moments, stranded out in the wastelands, Jane allowed herself to speculate on the fate of her loved ones. Depending on the day, it could bolster her resolve or eat her alive from the inside out.

She never stopped to think of those she despised, and how their odds of survival were just as good as anyone else's. In fact, you could argue that their odds were even better. Survival of the fittest, eat or be eaten, kill or be killed - all at any cost. It's what always made the bad guys so hard to catch. The bastards were pre-loaded for the apocalypse.

Not that she had any room to talk. Circumstances were shitty and Jane had crossed the line herself. More than once. A line stretched so thin by the rotters and outlaws that she wondered if she hadn't lost sight of it altogether. It wasn't as easy anymore, nothing was really. Right and wrong, black and white.

Maybe she existed as both, treading somewhere in the gray. It was either that or drown in the abyss.

The man made his way to them, confidently and with purpose, wearing a pin-striped suit and blue tie. His posture was tall and perfect, just as Jane remembered it before they booked him for murdering his own brother.

Garrett Fairfield.

He immediately extended a soft, well-manicured hand.

"When I heard the good news I just had to come by and see for myself," he announced.

An awkward silence passed.

Jane's chilly reception tempered his wide smile and he lowered his hand.

"I'm sure you must be wondering how I'm here." He said it politely enough but all Jane could hear was condescension.

"More like wondering why you're not dead," she stated bluntly.

"Jane…" Maura whispered.

But her attention was locked on Garrett.

Maura observed Jane's profile, how her jaw line hardened and how a dark menace shadowed her features. She practically simmered in her own skin, like a caged animal. Jane was so fiercely beautiful like this - tall and righteous, creeping towards the edge of something dangerous. A rush of blood flowed up Maura's neck and much to her dismay, to other parts.

Upon sensing a threat, Jane would always protect her without fail or forethought of consequence.

Good for Maura but potentially very bad for Garrett.

She wished he hadn't come here. Before she even had a chance to converse with Jane! It was so typical of him, believing he could smooth everything over and make amends. It's what sophisticated people did, always more for their benefit than anyone else's. Such politics. Growing up, Constance Isles had tried to teach Maura the same song and dance, but she could never quite get the steps down.

As if reading her thoughts, he spoke again. "I can see that my coming here might have been a mistake."

"Why isn't this guy in jail?" Jane asked to no one in particular.

"Technically, I am!" Garrett joked airily.

"Really, asshole? Really? I'm not laughing," Jane spat.

"Jane, please," Maura quietly pleaded. She stroked her arm, trying to calm her.

Jane caught how Garrett's eyes subtly followed their contact and didn't like it. He reached into his jacket and withdrew a folded sheet of paper, then held it out to her.

"I handle room assignment, among other things. I came down here to give this to you personally. Welcome back, Jane."

She stared at him in disbelief, her irrational anger growing by leaps and bounds. He set the paper down on the hospital bed and in doing so, positioned himself gravely close to the imaginary bubble she had drawn around herself and Maura.

"Maura, I'll see you later?" He asked, careful to avoid any eye-contact with Jane.

Maura sighed and really wished he hadn't said that.

Jane stepped away, jerking her arm out of Maura's hand, and stalked towards him. Garrett backpedaled so fast he stumbled over his own feet.

"Sorry, sorry," he said, arms raised in supplication. "Look, I'm sure Dr. Isles will explain everything to you soon enough. Things are very different now."

"I don't need you to tell me that, dickhead."

"I know I've made mistakes but I've changed," he offered.

"So have I," she seethed. Her ominous tone was unmistakable.

He dropped their eye-contact like a scolded puppy. Coward. Jane was done with him. He wasn't worth the energy it took to scare the shit out of him anymore, but it was fun while it lasted.

"In time, you'll see that I'm working to make up for my past. I've done a lot for this community since you've been…away," he said. God, would he ever just shut up and leave? "You'll see. Everything will be excellent. E plus excellent," he finished, optimistic.

Jane lost all her patience. Who said shit like that?

"Why don't you E plus eat me?"

"Jane!" Maura chastised.

Then her brother, previously content to be a fly on the wall, exploded with laughter. Jane smirked.

"Frankie!"

Unequipped to handle the crassness of Jane's barb, Garrett's mouth closed into a thin line. He nodded curtly and turned on his heels, his four hundred dollar shoes clicking meekly as they carried him out of the infirmary.

All three of them stood there for a beat.

Jane eyed Maura carefully. She was staring off in the distance, mouth slightly agape, no doubt trying to process what had just occurred. Maybe she wasn't mad.

Finally, she slipped off the bed and pointed to the spot she previously occupied, the thin mattress now slightly indented.

"You. Sit there and wait," she ordered. The doctor was in and Jane obeyed wordlessly.

Maura shot Frankie a disapproving look as she moved past him. He curled his grin between his lips in an attempt to regain his composure. His shoulders shook with the effort and a small snort escaped his nostrils.

Okay. So she was mad. Jane had some damage control to do, but she'd charmed her way out of worse. She kind of looked forward to it.

Maura sailed around the room, throwing on her lab coat, opening and slamming drawers, and gathering up all sorts of stainless steel tools that Jane didn't recognize. Jane's eyes widened and she briefly wondered if this routine examination might not turn into a dissection.

"Hey," Frankie whispered. She glanced at him, the sounds of Maura making her preparations clanging noisily in the background. "You're in so much trouble."

"Oh, shut up."

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