Author's Note: This will be just a very few super short chapters on the Akatsuki. Hopefully you enjoy this short series ^^

Disclaimer: I really do not take any credit for Naruto characters. I swear!

Chapter 1: How To Be Evil

It was noisy in the cave as usual. Hidan, Kakuzu, Konan and Kisame have all gathered around a poker table, each chipping in their desired amount. Zetsu seemed to be still and was literally sticking out his body on the side of the wall, enclosed in his venus flytrap. Deidara was doing a clay sculpture and Tobi sat down to watch the artist at work. Sasori was mocking his art and fixed some of his puppets that were either broken in battle or was improving them due to pure boredom. As for Itachi, he was reading a novel on the couch. How he could focus was a mystey.

Pein have then entered the room with an air of upper status as he is ready to make an announcement. Despite having a group, what was their purpose?

"Everyone, lately you guys have been slacking off on your duties..."

"ALL, mine baby!" Kakuzu gloated as he hugged all the chips to his side of the table. Konan slammed her head on the table in defeat and Hidan called it an outrage. Kisame was skeptical and claimed that the player cheated.

"I didn't cheat. I just play better" Kakuzu answered.

"BULL SHIT! There's no way someone could win every single damn round!" The Jashinist cussed out.

"Guys..."

"TOBI! The bird is not suppose to be sat on, yeah!" Deidara was trying to get Tobi off his giant bird sculpture but Tobi hung onto it. "Look Senpai, I'm flying! Wheeeee."

"TOBI! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

"Deidara shut up. Just let the kid play with with your clay toy" said Sasori as he attached another arm to the puppet.

"T-t-toy? This is a masterpiece, something YOU suck at doing! Your crap of art are dolls made for girls."

"Excuse me? I refuse to talk at your certain level."

"No need to worry. I pretty much already figured out your immaturity Sasori. We all now my art beats yours by a long shot, hm."

"Oh no. Here it goes again" complained Zetsu as he completely hidden himself in the wall.

"Everyone!"

"YOU CALL THOSE PETTY CLAY THINGS ART? They're only worth as child's play at best! You don't even know what you're talking about. Art is eternal and everlasting just like my puppets."

"CHILD'S PLAY? You have a DOLL! A DOLL! Your everlasting art crap is just like your age, ancient. Real art is fleeting. It just takes one glimpse to appreciate the one moment you will only see like an explosion!"

"AKATSUKI!"

Everyone stopped what they were doing to look at Pein. Kakuzu still continued to hug his treasure. Pein sighed and proceeded with his speech. "Like I was saying, each and every one of you have been lacking in your duties in creating havoc. Do you guys even know why we are an evil organization in the first place?"

"We're here to be together and become best friends forever!" Tobi cried happily as he hugged himself tightly to show emphasis.

"Make money, of course" said Kakuzu.

"To show how weak everyone is" Itachi replied.

"To kill" said Hidan bluntly.

"To protect the world from devastation?" asked Konan.

"You mean to unite all people within our nation" Kisame pointed out.

"Explosions!" Yelled Deidara.

"Anything but explosions" said Sasori.

"I thought it was suppose to just make us look bad-ass for being in a cool club" Zetsu thought out.

"GOD DAMMIT! ITS TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD YOU DUMB ASSES. And we're not a club. We're a group of evil villains. Get that through your thick heads!"

Pein gave out a heavy sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. Without trying to yell, he commanded, "Today, I want you guys to do one thing. ONE easy task. So easy that even a genin could do it. Do one evil task. This will bring up our reputation and I'm just asking you all to do one evil task."

"Tobi can do that!"

"I bet you would fail" said Deidara.

"Just get out and do it!"

This is where their adventures finally began.