Lia: Ideally, Issa will not be showing up today to write her little notes-thing to you guys because I grounded her until she gets her job done. Unfortunately, I am not her mother, and thus, I have no authority whatsoever to ground her, which she had smugly pointed out. So, therefore-
Clary: CLARY (NOT ISSA) IS HERE~~~~~~ You KNOW you can never take me away from my beloved readers, Lia.
Lia: Says the girl who barely writes her stories.
Clary: THAT'S DIFFERENT! But I love all of my AWESOME readers, because they are AWESOME, like me, and we be AWESOME together~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lia: I can keep you away from them as much as I like because you're in MY house, using MY computer and I have every right to refuse you permission until you finish your quilting project.
Clary: I CAN'T SEW, OKAY? I can't sew to save my life, and you know that~~~~~ So back off, I'm not finishing no stupid quilting project~~~~
Lia: Yes you are, or you won't pass high school.
Clary: IT'S JUST HOME EC! Damn it, Lia, I can SO fail Home Ec and get away with it, I mean, the boys in our school fail Home Ec all the time~~~
Lia: Okay, one: last time I checked, you're a GIRL. And, two: Issa, that quilting project you just called stupid is a REQUIREMENT. You can't pass high school unless you turn the thing in.
Clary: But Lia~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I can't sew~~~~
Lia: You can't sew because you have thimbles in every single one of your fingers. Thimbles are for the THUMBS, not all the fingers. Take them all off, and you'd end up doing a decent job.
Clary: But I'd get pricked!
Lia: (sigh) Not if you're careful. My god, Issa. (turns to readers) Since Issa is busy finishing off her quilt, please busy yourselves by enjoying the thirteenth (yes, I can't believe Issa got this far, either) installment of her story.
(:
DEATH PLAY
Written by: Clary~
Acknowledgements to: Lia (Clary's not-editor), Alatarielf (we're glad we made you happy~ and we love Persona, too~~ hope you enjoy this one~), lemon-and-chai (don't you worry, you shall find out soon~), phoenixfirekitsune (maa~ thanks so much~~ Clary wanted to write that scene so much because you just have to love Fuji's family :)), Knights of Cydonian Starlight (we love Yuki too~~ and thanks so much, ne~~~)
XIII. MEMOIRE
Yukimura was four years, seven months, and thirteen days old when his parents died (he marked the exact day, up to the last second: two hours, fifty-four minutes and twenty-three seconds). And somehow, for some reason, it didn't affect him.
All the adults now in charge of him in the Academy worried that he wasn't feeling enough, worried because he was so, so quiet, worried because he never cried. Frankly, Yukimura thought it was funny. What's there to cry about? There was nothing.
Just... emptiness.
He waved off their concerns, fooling them with his easy (fake) smile, and somehow, somewhere along the way, he thought he fooled himself, too, fooled himself into thinking that everything was alright, that everything was okay, that he wasn't empty, that his smiles were real.
He was that good, he grew up that quickly.
Cutting off the pain was easy. Forgetting about the fact that he even had a family was easy. Not remembering anything about the past four, almost five (happy) years was easy. Everything was easy.
He was Yukimura, after all.
And he didn't need anyone. Not those fussing teachers, not those weak classmates, and certainly not the family that was crass enough to leave him all alone.
No one.
NO ONE.
Yukimura was all alone in the world and that was good, because he was strong by himself, he was not weak, he wouldn't ever be weak like his little weakling father and weakling mother who died without even so much as a struggle.
He won't ever be like them.
He won't ever remember them.
Why would he need weakling parents?
They just embarrassed him with their weakness.
And to think, they were the ones who kept telling him to "Be strong, Seiichi!" What hypocrites. They obviously didn't know what they were talking about when they told him that, because strength was so much more than bleeding on the floor, dying, leaving the only son they ever had without any family, no one, all alone-
DAMN THEM!
Damn them all to hell.
They deserved to rot there.
And he was okay – GREAT, even – all by himself.
And he believed it, even though whenever he told himself that, some voice inside him would scream about how very wrong he was. But after some time, with the ease that he used into transitioning into this new... situation, he was able to squash that voice quiet, too.
He thought that made him strong.
And he was able to fool himself nicely for almost over a year, smiling, faking, feeling nothing.
./.
"Check it out. New kid."
Yukimura looked away for one second from where he was staring out the window to assess the 'new kid.' He was marked as a Dangerous Ability Type, too, not that it mattered to Yukimura.
He was quite the unassuming kid. Tousled brown hair, hazel eyes, rimless glasses. He would be taller than Yukimura for about at least ten centimeters, but whatever. Strength was so much more than height.
He looked pampered, loved. And Yukimura instantly disliked "My name is Tezuka Kunimitsu." He didn't care about the name, he didn't care about the face, he didn't care about anything.
But as the boy moved by to his little kindergarten table – empty, just like Yukimura's – Yukimura took care to let the shadows ripple, just a little, enough to at least jolt the kid.
He noticed and turned his hazel gaze to Yukimura. Yukimura met it with equal power, smiling sickeningly-sweet, giving his most honey-filled, "Nice to meet you, Tezuka-san."
"Ah."
Yukimura narrowed his stare. It was one thing to act all unaffected and passive to Yukimura's alice and it was quite another to respond to him with a one-syllable, passionless "ah".
It irked him.
His smile widened and he looked away, feeling, with every fiber of his being that he had just found a worthy match.
He hoped Tezuka Kunimitsu will be able to put up a decent fight.
And Tezuka Kunimitsu did. He turned out to be more than a decent match, actually, brilliant at everything, he breezed through class (and star rankings) with almost as much ease as Yukimura; he even had a formidable alice to boot (as well as a complete, loving family, if all the letters he'd been receiving every mail time was any indication).
It made Yukimura somehow bitter, and part of him wanted to remember all those memories he'd squashed, all those memories of the times when he had been genuinely happy, so he wouldn't feel so jealous. (But mostly, Yukimura just wanted to break him.)
It wasn't very long until Yukimura found the means to his end.
Because it turned out that Tezuka Kunimitsu had a beloved little brother.
Shadows talk a lot, and they were certainly very useful in times like these, when he wanted information, they never failed him before, they didn't fail him now, and it won't be very long now, it won't be very long, indeed, Yukimura was going to snuff out all of Tezuka's irritating brilliance, irritating contentment, irritating happiness, and Tezuka will be broken.
Just like the way Yukimura was.
./.
The brother, a little thing of a Dangerous Type, was all alone. And he supposed he couldn't have expected anything else, considering how Dangerous Types were avoided like plague in the Academy. Everyone was afraid of Dangerous Types, even teachers, and no matter how young they are, Dangerous Types tended to be left well-alone.
That's how Yukimura found him, Tezuka Syusuke, alone in the playground, trying to play in the swings during what should have been something like nap time. Four years old, legs barely hitting the ground, futilely attempting to swing himself upwards, too stubborn to give up.
And for the first time in a year, his heart felt something other than emptiness (which he ignored).
He sat down on the only other swing left, and opened his mouth to get the kid to raise his head and look at him. Only he didn't need to.
Because Tezuka Syusuke turned to him and gave him a wide, brilliant, close-eyed smile, so full of happiness and acceptance, he was taken aback. His head reeled, his heart pounded and the little voice he thought he'd silenced screamed something so loud, it was incoherent.
He spent the next few hours staring at Tezuka Syusuke like an idiot.
And it happened every single day.
He would sit beside Tezuka's little brother (who would still be futilely trying to swing himself upwards with his little legs) and Tezuka's little brother would smile at him like... like... that way... and he'd feel something he couldn't understand and would just sit there like a damn statue until Tezuka Syusuke was called back inside his kindergarten room.
Yukimura liked it.
And he hated that he liked it.
Because he promised himself no more feelings like these. Feelings like these only made you weak. Feelings like these only made you... what his parents had become. Feelings like these would kill you in the end.
And Yukimura was strong, Yukimura was not like his parents, Yukimura was not going to die like that.
So one day he forced himself to ask, "Why?" He narrowed his eyes and repeated: "Why? Why do you smile like that?"
Tezuka Syusuke did not hesitate at the answer. "Because you sat beside me."
And it was so fucking simple, so fucking innocent, Yukimura wanted to cry (and for some strange, weird reason, Yukimura wanted to reach out and hug him, too).
From that day onwards, Yukimura looked forward to that peaceful moment, that peaceful hour, that peaceful time with Tezuka Syusuke, when the hole in his heart would fill up somewhat and he wouldn't feel so, so empty. He'd just sit there quietly next to Tezuka Syusuke, feeling his acceptance and simple happiness, trying to make himself believe that he was just as happy.
From that day onwards, too, Tezuka Syusuke would always be there, bringing little somethings for him, chocolate, candy, cookies, always ready with a little story that would sometimes make Yukimura laugh the way he did when his parents were still alive.
From that day onwards, they became friends.
./.
During the second anniversary of his parent's death, he trudged to the usual playground eager to have the warmth of Tezuka Syusuke's little smile.
And Syusuke did start to smile, but after taking one look at Yukimura's face, his smile died out like a candle and was promptly replaced by a cute frown.
"Something's wrong today," he said pensively.
Yukimura blinked, taking a mental check of his countenance. He was smiling like usual, his stance was at ease, like usual, he was relaxed like usual. So what was wrong?
"Nothing's wrong today," Yukimura declared firmly, seating himself beside Tezuka Syusuke once more.
Tezuka Syusuke dropped his head down and hummed, remaining quiet for the first time in a long time.
Just as Yukimura was about to prompt him into speaking about something again, the kid hopped out of his swing and walked up to Yukimura, small and slight and short but determined. He reached out his little hands to grasp Yukimura's own and even though he could have pulled away if he wanted to, Yukimura didn't. Instead, he closed his eyes and relished the feeling.
"I... I know that you don't know me very much," Tezuka Syusuke was saying. "We just sit beside each other and... I don't even know your name... But, but if there's something that's making you feel bad, you can tell me. I'll listen."
Yukimura gasped at the strength of the voice inside him, telling him to go ahead and talk, go ahead and share, he could trust this Tezuka Syusuke.
But his mind wouldn't let him. And his mind, as always, won the battle.
"No, it's okay," he replied. "I can handle it on my own." He untangled his hands from the child's hold and patted them.
"Please?"
"I'm strong enough for these kinds of things, okay?"
"I.. Can I tell you what I think?"
Yukimura looked up from where he was staring at their hands and watch Tezuka Syusuke turn his head away, biting his lip nervously. He almost smiled. "Go ahead," he urged.
Tezuka's kid brother turned to him and opened his eyes for the first time. "I think you're lonely."
And the blue of Tezuka Syusuke's eyes were so compassionate, so full of worry, so full of sadness for him, a stranger whose name Tezuka Syusuke didn't even know, they suddenly made Yukimura so, so, so unbelievably full of grief. All the walls, all the shields, all the dams he'd made started to crumble away until there was nothing left.
And there, in the arms of a child so much younger but so much wiser than him, two years after his parents' deaths, Yukimura let himself cry for the first time.
Because Syusuke was all he needed after all. All he needed was someone, anyone to be there, to hug him, to hold him while he cried, to give him soft, soothing words, to give him a comforting presence. He had been afraid before that there would be no one like that, no one good enough, so he sealed away all his emotions so he wouldn't have to need anyone.
But he did.
And Yukimura felt so much relief.
Sometime later, when Yukimura had stopped crying, Syusuke peered up at him through thick lashes, his blue eyes stangely familiar and sparkling. "Ne, you know... I'm lonely, too, sometimes." He grinned. "But see, if we have each other, we won't ever be lonely, ne? You'll see. I'll even let you meet my onii-sama. He's really smart and I know he'll like you, too. And then we could-"
"Yukimura," he interrupted, smiling at Tezuka Syusuke, petting his head warmly and smiling genuinely.
"Yu.. Yukimura?"
Yukimura's smile widened. "My name. It's Yukimura Seiichi."
"Yukimura-san," Syusuke tried and giggled to himself. "Nice to meet you, Yukimura-san."
Yukimura shook his head and laughed. "Call me Seiichi."
"Seii.. chi. Seiichi"
"And I'll call you Syusuke."
Syusuke's beautiful blue familiar eyes lit up, brightening his entire countenance. "Okay!"
./.
Not much later, Yukimura realized who Syusuke really was. Not much later, he formally introduced himself to Tezuka. Not much later, disturbed by how Syusuke called Tezuka a name that he wasn't deserving of, Yukimura convinced Syusuke to call his so-called brother Ku-nii. Not much later, it became nii-san, which he tolerated. Not much later, he promised himself that he will be strong for Syusuke. Because he loved the only family he had left.
For true strength came from feelings like these. True strength stemmed from the desire that stemmed from love. Through Syusuke, Yukimura would be strong.
That's how it always was and ever will be.
(Little did he know, he was wrong about that, too.)
./.
The first thing that he should have noticed (and that should have alerted him that things weren't going exactly as planned) was that the nearer they got to the First Gate, the noisier his Army became. But it was such a little detail (considering his little inner celebration), and the dead were a noisy bunch anyway, he chose to ignore it.
The second thing he should have noticed (and that should have alerted him that things weren't going exactly as planned) was that the closer they got to the First Gate, the more reluctant his Army became. Some dragged their feet, some got slower, some stopped altogether. But the dead were usually like that – slow, dragging, reluctant to get to life, and he was still too busy feeling victory, he ignored that, too.
The last fucking thing he should have noticed (and that should have fucking alerted him that things weren't going exactly as fucking planned) were the silver tendrils glowing brightly all over the First Gate. But, damn it!, he had been careless and much too happy and arrogant, he wasn't even able to see the damn markings until he walked right up to the First Gate opening and found that he couldn't get through.
"Non erit transiens," Morto pronounced somewhere about a few feet behind him, sounding extremely amused (what the fuck was there to be amused about?). "None shall pass. A strong ward, to be sure, Lord Ashikaga, made by an almost-omnipotent presence in Death."
His Army screeched their agreement from even farther away from where Morto was and he felt like screaming.
"Even I cannot do anything about this." And almost as proof, just as Morto's black tendrils creeped closer than where he was currently located, the silver tendrils flared brightly (brighter than the barrier holding Morto ever did) and engulfed the tendril in their furious hot light.
Persona did this? Which kid did he fucking use to do this?
He had no one, no one, who could fight against him, he made sure of it, he made so sure of it, he killed three of the Academy's most powerful clans!
He killed the Clan of Death!
Persona couldn't have done this, unless he found a fucking way to fucking resurrect the fucking dead (which he can't, last time he checked, all Persona was good for was sending people to death, certainly not resurrecting them, damn it).
But somehow... this...
"This is the work of a Fuji."
What?
But all the Fujis were dead!
"It's not," he said fiercely. "I killed them all myself. Everyone."
"But I cannot be mistaken, my Lord. The feel of the ward is distinctly Fuji."
"You are mistaken. All the Fujis are dead by my own hands! Do you doubt me?"
"I do not. But I am not mistaken either. This ward was created by a Fuji. A young one, but quite powerful."
He felt like killing something. But he forced himself to calm down, calm the fuck down, and think.
What did he miss?
The Fuji head and his family were dead. The Yukimura head and his family were dead. The Tezuka head and his family were dead. Killed by him.
But, if he was to believe Morto, someone, a Fuji (with an almost-omnipotent presence in Death), survived.
Who and how?
Elimination, he'll figure it out using elimination (calm, that's right).
It had to be a Fuji stemming directly from the head, omnipotent presences in Death (and powerful ones) don't exactly come by to the diluted bloodlines. Okay.. The Fuji head's family included his wife, Fuji Yoshiko (dead, he'd slit her throat himself), his beloved little daughter, Fuji Yumiko (also dead, stabbed in the heart, if he remembered correctly), his beloved little son, Fuji Syusuke (dead, as was expected, considering how he was in his mother's womb when he killed the mother) and his beloved little son, Fuji Yuuta (dead, as was expected, considering how he was in his mother's womb wh...)
Wait a moment.
Fuji Syusuke and Fuji Yuuta weren't twins, were they? No, they weren't. Fuji Syusuke was supposed to be a year older than the unborn Fuji Yuuta and he...
Fuck. He couldn't recall a single fucking time he'd killed a baby.
He clenched his fists. So that's who Persona had up his sleeve. The 'young but powerful' Fuji Syusuke.
Damn it (if he hadn't been so fucking careless...).
He took a deep breath (calm, calm). That could be easily fixed. Easily fixed.
That's right.
All he had to do was kill the scion of the Fuji clan, and he'd be free to do whatever he wanted to again.
And that would be easy. He had Hinako, Murakami and Chizuru, all immortals, all powerful. And considering how he was the last Fuji in the world, the young Syusuke was bound to be untrained and unknowing of his true potential in Death.
Easy.
He'll just have to sanction Fuji Syusuke's death.
./.
Syusuke had filled the hole in Yukimura's heart. But now that he was gone, all Yukimura could feel was the widening of the gap, becoming so impossibly large, it threatened to consume his entire heart.
He can't... he just can't live without Syusuke. Not... not after everything... not after...
He cradled Syusuke's cold body and dropped his head to Syusuke's chest, listening to the silence that his tears could never fill.
It wasn't fair!
Syusuke... Syusuke had been so alive, so vibrant, so full of life. Syusuke promised, they promised that they won't let each other be alone anymore. Syusuke just couldn't be...
Yukimura gasped, feeling his breath coming short, and he pressed his head impossibly closer to Syusuke's chest.
Was that...?
Was that a heartbeat he just felt just now?
...
And Yukimura found himself crying again.
A heartbeat! Very faint, very weak but there. It was there! Syusuke... Syusuke was...
He tightened his hug and cried tears of relief.
./.
Tezuka didn't know just how many times he has to come close to losing Syusuke before he found the courage to just up and admit how much he loved him. It was stupid, he knew, but he was raised to be prideful and prideful people just didn't... well, do those things.
But Syusuke never hesitated. And Syusuke always loved him, always smiled for him, always was everything Tezuka could ever ask for. And he knew it didn't deserve it, but Syusuke loved him, he didn't know how, but somehow he did.
He thought of all the cranes Syusuke had carefully folded and given him, one every year, always with a smile and a little 'I love you.'
"Nii-san, they say if you make a thousand cranes, you'd be granted a wish!"
His only wish right now, sitting by Syusuke's bed in the lonely infirmary... was that Syusuke would wake up. Because sitting here like this, holding a cold, unmoving hand, hearing Syusuke's labored gasps for breath only made him worry more, only made him think that Syusuke was going to die anyway.
And he couldn't bear it, if it happened.
Because his heart belonged to Syusuke. No one else could ever compete.
Syusuke let out a small whimper and Tezuka tightened his hand, willing Syusuke to feel it, willing Syusuke to know that he was here, just like he always was, just like he always ever will be.
He brought the cold hand up to his lips and kissed it murmuring 'I love you' against the skin of his not-brother, maybe-lover, always-beloved.
And Syusuke slowly blinked awake, almost as if responding to his whispered confession.
Syusuke let out a soft shaky breath before turning his head to him, all blue-eyes and fake-smiles that pulled at Tezuka's heart.
Because seeing Syusuke like this suddenly made it all too painfully clear to Tezuka just how close, how close, he had been to losing him. How, if Syusuke hadn't been strong enough, he wouldn't be staring at brilliant blue eyes so beautiful they drowned him. How, if Yukimura hadn't found him at that time, Syusuke wouldn't be fake-smiling, trying to worm his way out of Tezuka's worry when it was so painfully obvious that he was hurting and unhappy.
And facing the almost-loss, with Syusuke.. with Syusuke... almost...
Something in Tezuka snapped, and he found himself damning the consequences, let them come, let them be happy for once. He reached out, cupped Syusuke's delicate face and slammed their lips together.
He wanted this. He wanted this so, so bad and he had come very, very close to not having the chance to do this anymore. He wasn't going to be some coward, held back by stupid pride. He was going to fight for Syusuke, he was going to fight for what he wanted, for the only person that would ever matter in his life.
And Syusuke was so damn responsive, it fueled Tezuka's decision even more. Syusuke was kissing him back, clinging to him and he tighted his hold on his beloved, trying to get him as close as possibe, so close, so that then, nothing can take him away, not even death.
They could all try.
And they were all going to fail.
Tezuka was not going to lose Syusuke.
Not now, not ever.
./.
They broke away for air, and despite the dizzy ring in Syusuke's head, he was in heaven.
Nii-san... Nii-san had never... Well, he did, but not like this, not this passionate, not this intense. And, god, Syusuke loved it. He knew he'd be hurting himself in the end, because, well, they really just couldn't ever be together. But this... Just knowing that he could pretend for a while, for just a few hours that everyday of his life would be like this, that he had every right to stay in his brother's arms, that he had a chance of his brother ever becoming truly his... It was enough.
Because pretending and having something to hold on to when he was all alone someday was so much better than not even trying and having nothing.
Even though it hurt like hell afterwards.
He looked up to his brother, wanting to cry, but feeling his heart thundering as he saw the desire and the passion darkening his brother's usual hazel orbs and he knew he could do this. He could bask in the short-lived happiness this offered and afterwards, he'd cling to these memories he would forever cherish.
He would take the happiness whenever he could. Even if it was just this once.
So he raised himself up to meet his lips with his brother's again, moaning when his nii-san kissed fiercely back, feeling everywhere he and his nii-san touched. He was in his little circle of passion and happiness, where there was no one else, where there was no other factors, just him and his Kunimitsu, just them and the love they both had for each other.
And when Kunimitsu lay him back down on the bed, Syusuke didn't think of how he'd be regretting this later on, or just how much it would hurt him to pull away once it was all over. For now, this was what he wanted and he was going to take it.
Kunimitsu's hands, his mouth, his body, his everything was like molten magma, burning slowly where it touched Syusuke's skin, deliciously hot, decidedly pleasurable. Somehow, Kunimitsu knew just the right places to touch, just the right places to kiss, just the right time to pull away and start undoing all the buttons. Or maybe, maybe he didn't but Syusuke enjoyed it anyway, because it was Kunimitsu with him. He didn't know, he didn't care.
Kunimitsu was everything right now. There was nothing else.
And Kunimitsu was being so painfully perfect, so perfectly everything, drawing his shirt away, making Syusuke gasp at his tiny little kisses that...
A knock on the door startled him out of his passion-induced circle.
Kunimitsu's only response was to give a somehow fierce growl, holding onto him tighter, kissing him once again, making him forget, and he felt himself start to return to his little world that began and ended where he and Kunimitsu began and ended...
Another knock, louder and more insistent, this time, but still generally ignored.
"Syusuke! Syusuke, are you okay?"
He startled out of his little world with another gasp once again.
He knew that voice.
That was Meiko's voice.
Meiko.
He feebly pushed his brother away, heaving heavy breaths, feeling flushed and hot, his head falling out of the clouds.
He risked a glance at his brother, also flushed, glasses askew (strange that he didn't notice that when they were kissing), eyes still dark with desire and looked away.
"Syusuke.."
"No, I..." Syusuke shook his head. "I'm sorry. It's my fault."
"Syusuke." His nii-san's voice was firm and more than a little angry. "Look at me."
"No." I can't. I can't look at you and see all that your eyes promise me to, because it will be so hard to pull away.
I can't.
I love you too much.
Nii-san sighed and reached out a hand across the space between them that hadn't existed just a few moment before. Syusuke tensed, but all his brother did was close all the buttons that had been opened and fix his shirt. Then, he retracted his hands, fixed himself, too, and raked a hand through his tousled hair.
Syusuke watched as his brother walked towards the open windows of the infirmary with slow, measured steps. Nii-san looked back at him and Syusuke averted his gaze.
"There was nothing wrong with what we did, Syusuke. Nothing at all."
And his nii-san left, leaving him behind, confused and hurt.
./.
Meiko was... hysterical, to say the least.
She flew inside the infirmary when she was given permission and hugged Syusuke so tight, he almost fainted. But she was a bundle of overjoyed nerves, beaming happily, telling him just how happy she was that he was alive and well and everything, even though it was only... yesterday? a few hours ago? that he broke her heart.
She was just... genuinely glad he was alive and well, and not once did she say anything that was remotely near... what had happened on the rooftop.
"I know you don't love me."
...Or perhaps he had thought too soon.
He looked back at Meiko and found her eyes solemn and firm (somehow, somehow, it reminded him of the nii-san he could never have). "I know... you don't love me, Syusuke."
What could he say? It was the truth, Meiko had told the truth, what more was there to say?
"But I also know you're hurting."
She paused and smiled, holding up a hand to stop his protest (which would have been feeble, at best). "You can't hide it, Syusuke," she continued, reaching out a hand and cupping his face. "Your smile... doesn't reach your eyes."
"I'm sorry." What else could he say?
"Don't be.." She smiled again, obviously forced, just like the way Syusuke's smile was. "I know this might sound.. I don't know.. desperate to you, but... Hell... I.. I guess, what I'm saying is, will... Will you go out with me?"
Syusuke's eyes widened to unbelievable proportions. Did Meiko just say what he thought she just said?
Meiko raised her hands in alarm at his expression. "Hey! Wait! Don't go off thinking... Syusuke!" She averted her gazed and blushed.
"Meiko, what.."
"It's just.. I don't know. I thought..." A sigh. "I don't know what I thought, really. Maybe I was just being selfish and I wanted to be happy. But I thought.. Maybe.. Maybe I could help you forget and be happy, too. Maybe.. we could be happy... together." She hugged herself and looked away. "And maybe... maybe you'll even end up.. loving... me."
The last part was a whisper.
And Syusuke felt a little pull at his heart, watching her like that. He still didn't love her and he knew he never could but...
If it made her happy...
Then, at the very least, he was able to make a difference in someone's life.
He touched her arm, and smiled as she turned to look at him. "Thank you, Meiko.
"I'd love to."
Clary: I personally think that this is the longest chapter ever that I've written so far, it's so fucking long, I was just like ohmyholy did I totally write this?
Lia: Actually, the first part in italics were meant to be another sidestory.
Clary: But we thought, since it fit in with the main storyline and crap... Well, we figured, why the hell not just put it in the chapter? So yeah~ Memoire is French for memory, by the way~ (I LOVE YOU, LIA, AND YOUR AWESOME IDEAS)
Lia: Sure, if you say so Issa.
Clary: But anyway, I'M SO SORRY guys for being such a bad author and making you guys wait all the time~~~ I swear, we have this break at the end of October and THEN, I'll write like crazy, and I'll update EVERYDAY, if I have to, so I could make it up to you~ Whatcha guys think?
Lia: - had totally no idea this was going to happen (sarcasm... This was all she's been talking about since the beginning of the week. I'm a little proud of her, actually)
Clary: LIA DID NOT BRIBE ME, OKAY, I'M DOING THIS OF MY OWN FREE WILL AND BECAUSE I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH~~~~~~ (and also maybe partly a little because Lia promised to teach me how to swear in French.. BUT THAT'S NOT THE MAIN REASON AT ALL)
Lia: I take my job seriously, thank you very much.
Clary: :) Reviews are very much appreciated, ne~ And tell me what you guys think about my awesome game plan~ Who knows, I might even finish this story by the end of October (haha!)~ So give me some inspiration by reviewing, kay? :)