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Chapter 4: Back in Black

Exactly one week after his first lawn service, Sirius stared out his window as the Lupin Lawn Care van pulled up in his driveway. His stomach leapt a bit when he saw Remus climb out of his van. Sirius had tried throughout the rest of the week to get his mind off of Remus but to no avail. It almost terrified him the way Remus made him feel after only one encounter. His limbs began to tremble as he watched Remus walk to the back of his van.

Sirius had just gotten done with a swim when he remembered that today was the day for Remus, and as such, he was shirtless and still in his tight, spandex swimming shorts since he hadn't had time to change before Remus's expected arrival time. He had been looking forward to this day all week, and he couldn't help the giddy joy that enveloped him when Remus pulled his stuff out of his van and walked up the front steps. Sirius moved quickly out of eye shot and waited a few seconds after Remus knocked before he opened the door.

"Just wanted to let you know that I'm here, and I'll be out back," Remus said with a smile after Sirius opened the door. Sirius noticed Remus's eyes travel briefly to Sirius's stomach and then back up to his face before he turned and walked away. Sirius did not say anything, but instead he only closed the door and leaned his bare back against it. He was breathing deeply. Just the mere sight of Remus in that white v-neck and those cut off shorts was enough to make Sirius lose his mind. His mind had been occupied by Remus all day the day following his first visit, and that had not changed in the week following. Sirius had slept with Priscilla the night he had promised her, and much to his despair, he had thought of Remus the entire time. When he had pushed himself in and out of Priscilla, it was Remus he saw underneath him, not his wife. He had tried for the past week to stop thinking about Remus, but he couldn't. This was an itch he hadn't acknowledged for years, and he desperately needed to scratch.

Sirius's thoughts were interrupted by the sound of the click-clack of heels coming down the hall. He tried to quickly regain his composure as Priscilla rounded the corner. Priscilla. Sirius knew that Priscilla would never forgive him if he had another indiscretion, but he also knew that she would never leave him. He was the only person she had ever loved. Not only this, but if she wanted to keep up appearances in the most elite social circles, it would be a hard sell if the ladies knew that she and her husband had split because her husband was attracted to men. Priscilla wasn't an idiot. She saw the way Sirius looked at men, but she had no choice but to ignore it. She would do anything to keep Sirius in her life.

Yes, Sirius admitted that Priscilla had turned into someone he barely knew, but the other night he had seen a glimmer of what she used to be, and he did not want to ruin what they had just because he could not control his impulses. He could look, but not touch. Years ago, Sirius had made a choice, and now he had to live with that choice every day, quite literally. Sirius sighed quietly as Priscilla approached him.

"Well, I'm off to meet Bella," she said. Thoughts shifting quickly, Sirius could not contain an eye roll. Bellatrix Lestrange was Sirius's cousin who fit all of the elitist stereotypes that Sirius could not stand. Sirius hated that Priscilla spent any time with her because he feared that one day she would become just like his cousin. "Don't be like that, Sirius," Priscilla said when she saw his face. "She's family."

"Whatever, Pris, you know how I feel about her," Sirius said.

Priscilla huffed and maneuvered around him to the door. He had to admit that she looked very good in that tight, formfitting, strapless, dark blue dress. "I'll see you tonight," she said after placing a kiss on Sirius's cheek and running a soft hand briefly down Sirius's bare chest. "And don't let him put his disgusting shirt on the deck," she added with a stern look before she walked out the door. Sirius rolled his eyes and walked toward the kitchen.

As soon as the door closed behind Priscilla, his mind immediately went back to thoughts of Remus. Intentionally, Sirius had not only ordered a lawn mow, but he had also ordered gardening, weed-whacking, and hedge-clipping service. John Lupin, the owner of the company, had informed him that the job would take approximately six hours. To keep up appearances, he had sounded exasperated on the phone while on the inside he was like a giddy schoolgirl. Sirius was now standing at the same spot he'd stood last week as he had watched Remus mow his lawn. The tea cup was absent from his hand this time and he was now clothed in his swimming suit only, but the look of longing on his face matched the look he had worn a week prior.

Sirius had to work to pull his eyes away from the scene in front of him. Remus's shirt was off and hanging in his back pocket. He would occasionally use it to wipe sweat from his forehead and face. Sweat was glistening off of his toned back, chest, and stomach, and Sirius's mouth practically watered from the sight. Sirius turned away with difficulty and walked to his bedroom to put on some clothes. As he rifled through his drawers, Sirius tried to imagine what it would be like to have Remus in his bed. Since he had determined that he could only look, Sirius figured that a little fantasy couldn't hurt. Sirius imagined lowering Remus onto his bed and slowly trailing kisses on his neck, across his chest, and down his stomach.

"Sirius…" Remus would hiss. When Sirius's mouth found its way to the tip of Remus's member, Remus would moan loudly and arch his back.

Sirius braced his hands on his dresser drawer and tiled his head forward as he continued to imagine his fantasy.

As Sirius would begin to drag his tongue slowly up and down Remus's shaft, Remus's hips would buck up towards him, and Remus would beg quietly for Sirius to take him all the way in. Sirius would obey his wishes, and Remus's hands would creep to the back of Sirius's head and clutch his hair tightly as he forced himself deeper inside Sirius's mouth.

After a moment of slightly heavy breathing, Sirius dragged himself out of his fantasy of making Remus come undone beneath him in the bed that he and his wife occupied together every night, and he pulled a dark green polo over his head forcefully but remained bare below the waist except for his swimming shorts. He could feel himself growing slightly hard in his pants, so he determinately tried to focus his mind on something else. He walked over to his canopied king-size bed and fell back against it. His chest heaved slightly, and it took all of his will power to keep his mind off of Remus for even a few seconds.

"Damn, he's got a hold on me," Sirius whispered to himself with a tone of slight disbelief. Sirius laid in his bed for several more minutes, listening to the sounds of the mower outside and longing to be ravaged by the man who was operating it.

A bit later, Sirius, now fully clothed, walked from his bedroom and made his way to the kitchen. It seemed to be against his own will that his legs guided him to the place that he could have a perfect view of the man he seemed to be so infatuated with. He sat at the kitchen table so that he was facing the direction towards the glass door. He had a perfect view of Remus like he knew he would, and he thought his glances were disguised by the book he picked up from his table and started pretending to read. After about an hour of Remus mowing, it looked like he was nearly finished with this part, and Sirius thought that Remus could use a break on this hot day. He walked over to the glass door and slid it open, trying to get Remus's attention over the sound of the lawn mower. Finally, Remus looked up and smiled right before he killed the mower.

"Do you want a drink?" Sirius called. Remus nodded with that handsome smile still plastered on his face and walked up the porch and into the house. When he walked through the glass door his hand had slid across Sirius's thigh, but he kept his gaze straight ahead and did not look at Sirius. Sirius's heart leapt at the feeling of Remus's flesh caressing him through the material of his dark wash jeans. Sirius thought he saw a small smile on Remus's face when he passed, but Sirius dismissed the look momentarily and attempted to calm himself down by taking several deep breaths. It had only been the brush of a hand, but even that had caused Sirius's limbs to go temporarily numb.

Sirius motioned for Remus to take a seat at the table while he got the sweaty man a glass of water. "Hot day," Sirius said as he handed Remus the glass and took a seat around the corner from Remus. Their knees were almost touching, and this did not go unnoticed by either of them. When Remus spoke, Sirius's gaze shot back and forth between Remus's eyes and mouth.

Remus laughed a bit, "Yeah," he said. "But it's only supposed to get worse."

Sirius nodded and for a little while neither of them said anything. Remus smelled like sweat, dirt, grass, and musk, and Sirius was intoxicated by the smell. His eyes kept closing for a bit too long as he inhaled deeply to get the full smell. Remus had pulled his white v-neck over his head before he walked into the house, but Sirius could still seek the outline of his chest through the shirt. He didn't know what it was about this man that had him so turned on, but his feelings were undeniable. He wanted this man, and there was nothing he could do about it. He would try to fight it as long as he could, but it was already difficult when the man was nowhere near him, it was going to be impossible when Remus was in his presence. "So, you and your dad co-own this operation, or what?" Sirius asked in an attempt to take his thoughts someplace else.

Remus scoffed. "Not quite. If I co-owned, do you think I would be doing manual labor?"

Sirius gave a small side smile and chuckled a bit. "I guess not," he said.

"It's rough," Remus said. "To work with your dad. There are all these rules and expectations, and he's never quite satisfied."

"I know how you feel," Sirius said, nodding. "I'm a lawyer at my dad's firm, and he's always giving me some advice, which is just a way for him to tell me everything I'm doing wrong."

Remus shook his head with understanding. He didn't say anything for a few moments, and then, "Dads," he said. "Fuck 'em."

Sirius let out a barking laugh and slapped Remus on the knee. He let his hand linger for a bit too long—much longer than he knew he should—before he moved his hand back on top of the table. "You're funny," Sirius said simply. Remus smiled and took another sip of his water. When his arm went up, Sirius caught a flash of black right before Remus set his glass back down on the table. "You have a tattoo," Sirius said.

"Oh yeah," Remus said. He moved his hand quickly to put it in front of Sirius, and he knocked over his glass, sending water spilling all over both of them. They both jumped from their chairs and Sirius rushed over to the sink to grab the towel that was laying next to it. He cleaned the water off the floor and the table before he looked at the wet spot on the right leg of Remus's jean shorts and pressed the towel to it. Remus place his hands on top of Sirius's—whose were on top of the towel—in order to give more pressure to the towel to soak up the water. At the feeling of Remus's hands on his, Sirius looked up at Remus. Their faces were only mere inches from each other's, and without thinking—without telling himself all of the things he had been telling himself for a week—Sirius leaned in and kissed him. Remus pulled away and backed up quickly, and the towel fell to the ground in the process. Sirius looked at Remus's startled face, and he felt heat creep up his face. Idiot, he thought to himself.

Sirius bent down to pick up the towel and dropped his eyes as he walked over to the sink to ring the water out of the towel. "Look," Sirius began. But before he could say anything else, he felt strong hands grip his shoulders and turn him around forcefully. He then felt lips crash against his and a tongue found its way into his mouth. Sirius responded eagerly. He put his hands on Remus's waist and pulled Remus to him. He wanted this. They both did. As their groins rubbed against each other from underneath their clothes, Sirius heard Remus moan softly, and this only drove him further. He knew of the possible repercussions, but Sirius could not think of anything else but the feeling of Remus's soft tongue searching the inside of his mouth. After a moment, Sirius then pushed Remus against the counter behind him as he began to undo Remus's pants.

Then, without warning, Remus pushed Sirius off of him and without a word, he rushed out the back door. After a moment, Sirius heard the lawn mower start up again as Remus resumed his work. Sirius had no idea what had just happened. He knew he wanted Remus, and it was pretty clear now that Remus wanted him, so he didn't quite understand why Remus had pushed him away. Confused, Sirius walked to his bedroom and laid back on his bed once again. He heard silence for a while, then he heard the weed-whacker start up, followed by the sharp sound of the hedge clippers. For those few more hours, Sirius did not leave his room, but instead elected to stay reclined on his bed until he heard the sound of Remus's van start up and drive off down the street.

Sirius walked down the hall and rounded the corner when he saw the bill that Remus had slid underneath his front door. Sirius was speechless and he felt his chest clench. He didn't know what to do or think, but without thinking about it twice, he called Lupin Lawn Care and requested another visit from Remus in one week's time.

Preview for next chapter:

When he saw his long-haired, tattooed and pierced ex-boyfriend standing on the other side of the door, he slammed it closed.