I hated reading Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, I truly did. The book was 2-percent plot and 98-percent Angst, and I hate reading Angst.

So what am I doing in this story? Getting rid of the Angst.

Chapter 1
Dan Granger Writes a Letter

Saturday, 2nd September 1995; after breakfast
The second day of Harry's and Hermione's fifth year
The Great Hall, Hogwarts SOW&W
Hermione and Ron are Gryffindor prefects
Dolores Umbridge is the new DADA professor

Hedwig landed on the Gryffindor table, facing Hermione. Hedwig held out a leg.

Hermione removed the letter that was addressed to "Hermione Granger," that Emma Granger had written. The snowy owl promptly took back her leg.

Another letter still needed to be delivered; this letter was tied to Hedwig's other leg. Hermione, recognising her father's handwriting, reached for that letter, even as Hermione wondered why Hedwig had not offered her the second letter.

HERK! Hedwig screamed. She bit Hermione's hand painfully, then jumped back.

Hedwig then stepped forwards and held out her leg with the remaining letter—but the owl offered the letter to Harry, not to Hermione.

As soon as Harry removed the second letter, Hermione saw that the letter written by Dan Granger indeed was addressed to Harry. Even more strange, written on the front of the envelope was "Open only when you're alone."

Hermione was confused and hurt. She asked Harry, "Why would Daddy write a letter to you that he doesn't want me to read?"

Harry, whilst feeding ham to Hedwig, looked confused. He replied to Hermione, "I don't know. But for what it's worth, he didn't say to never let you read it, he just doesn't want you reading the letter right now, over my shoulder."

So saying, Harry shoved the letter into a pocket of his trousers.

Hermione's letter from her mother mostly held no surprises—in the two months since Hermione had been taken to Grimmauld Place, the Granger house had not burnt down and no alien spaceships had landed in the front garden. But the letter held one surprise, at the end of the letter—

"P.S. Your father has written a letter to Harry, man to man. Both your father and I strongly prefer that you not interrogate Harry about the letter, but instead wait for Harry to show the letter to you at the time he chooses."

Soon afterwards, in the Gryffindor common room

Harry stood in a corner, at least six feet away from every other person in the room and with his back to the walls, and read Dan Granger's letter.

"Bloody hell," Hermione heard Harry murmur after a time.

Harry then refolded the letter and shoved it back in his pocket. Right after this, Harry took the stairs to his dormitory, fetched writing supplies from his trunk, returned to the common room, and began writing something with parchment and quill.

When Hermione asked Harry what he was doing (because no classes had met yet, and Harry had finished his summer homework), he replied, "I'm writing a letter."

"To Daddy?"

Harry smiled at Hermione. "I won't tell you yet, except that it's not to your father."

Hermione did not like hearing this, but she did not object.

Harry waved his wand over the parchment, and the text of the parchment turned blurry.

Ron, who had been playing chess, now jumped up and walked over. Ron's red Prefect Badge was sticking-charmed to his Weasley jumper.

"Whatcha writing, Harry? And who's it to?"

Harry replied coldly, "You don't need to know those things, Weasley."

Ron's face changed to his "angry face." Ron snapped, "I'm your best mate, and best mates don't keep secrets from each other!"

Harry snapped, "No, Weasley, you're no longer my 'best mate.' Best mates believe that their friend didn't enter his name in the Goblet. Best mates write to their friends when their friends are feeling low, and—"

"But Dumbledore said—"

"—and best mates don't obey every last little command of their headmaster when school is not in session!"

Harry's index finger pounded against Ron's Prefect badge. "Admit it, that's how you got this! It bloody hell wasn't your marks, and it sure as fuck wasn't your table manners or your calm temper. You were chosen as Prefect because you're Dumbledore's lackey!"

Ron yelled, "Ten points, Potter! And a detention tonight with Filch!"

Harry laughed scornfully. "What a surprise, lazy-arse Weasley didn't read the Prefect Handbook. You as a Prefect can't assign anyone a detention. As for the points-loss, make it twenty points, loser!"

Ron's face was red, but he was silent. Everyone else in the common room—even the Twins—were just as silent. When Hermione looked about, every face showed shock.

Hermione was gobsmacked. She wondered, Is this the end of Harry's and Ron's friendship?

A few minutes later

Harry, with puzzled Hermione following, walked down to the barrels that were outside the Hufflepuff common room. Harry told a 'Puff firstie that he wanted to speak with Susan Bones. Susan came out, and Harry and Susan spoke briefly (and quietly) in the corridor. Hermione could not hear what Harry and Susan said to each other.

Hermione worried; Susan Bones had the biggest breasts in the school, whilst Hermione ... did not. Hermione suddenly was quite aware that for weeks during the summer, Harry had been alone at Privet Drive, and she, Hermione, had not written to him. Had Harry and Susan Bones become a couple?

Now when Harry returned to Hermione's side, Hermione asked him, "What was that about?"

Harry said, "I'll tell you later."

Hermione huffed, whilst frustrated and worried.

At lunchtime, on Saturday the 2nd, in the Great Hall

As soon as Harry walked into the Great Hall, he walked over to the fifth-year Hufflepuffs. Hermione saw Susan Bones climb off her bench, then Susan and Harry rushed out of the Great Hall.

Five minutes later, the two fifth-years walked back into the Great Hall. "Thank you for your help, Miss Bones," Harry called out.

When Harry reentered the Great Hall, Hermione noticed that her friend looked woozy, as though he just had Patronus'd away a dozen Dementors.

Then Harry staggered over to the Gryffindor table, to the empty piece of bench that was next to Hermione. Harry gracelessly dropped onto the bench.

Harry leant over towards Hermione and murmured, "You probably noticed, I read your dad's letter."

Curious Hermione burned to question-bomb Harry. Instead of doing this, Hermione spoke only a single word: "And?"

Harry averted his gaze. "I need to think about what your dad wrote."

Hermione huffed, whilst frustrated.

Several times that day, Sunday and Monday, Hermione sensed with her peripheral vision, Harry staring at her. But whenever Hermione turned her head to look at Harry, he averted his gaze.

Only her mother's admonition stopped Hermione from demanding of Harry that he tell her why he kept looking at her. Hermione needed to know what her father's letter said.

Monday evening, Harry had no appetite during dinner in the Great Hall, because right afterwards he would serve detention with Professor Umbridge.

(During DADA class on Monday, Professor Umbridge had assigned Harry a detention for no stated reason, and did this whilst Harry had been behaving himself in class. Hermione now wondered whether Professor Umbridge was related to Professor Snape.)

Monday at dinner, Hermione guessed that the pink-clad professor would order Harry to get out parchment, ink bottle and quill, then to write lines for his detention.

Hermione was halfway correct in her guess.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I will not reveal the text of Dan Granger's letter till the beginning of Chapter 4. This gives you readers three chapters to infer, from Harry's changed behaviour, what Dan Granger's letter says.