Chapter Five

I Find A Friend

I followed Miss Cardew up the long and winding staircase. Her calm and friendly voice seemed to steady my beating heart, and soothe away my nerves.

After reaching the head of the stairs, Miss Cardew led the way down a long and narrow passage. There were rows of doors on either side of the wall, and I guessed that each of these led into a dormitory. I was led right down to the end, where we turned into the last door on the right.

"This will be your room," said Miss Cardew as she ushered me in. "You will be sharing this room with three other girls. Oh, hello, Hannah – this is Julia who will be sharing the room with you and the other girls."

I felt somewhat abashed at being introduced to one of my roommates straight away. I hadn't expected to meet any of the girls just yet, and so Hannah's presence disconcerted me a little; however she soon put me at my ease, for she came forward to greet me with the loveliest, sincere smile and she had such kind and thoughtful eyes. "Hello, Julia. Welcome on board!"

I knew from that moment that we were destined to be good friends. Her smile seemed to be infectious, for I grinned back at her and replied a little stiffly, "Hello, Hannah, it's nice to meet you."

I think I must have sounded very awkward, and displayed how very unaccustomed I was at meeting new people, for Hannah laughed, an amused and merry laugh. "You don't need to put on airs and graces here, Julia! No formalities here! Just relax and enjoy yourself – you'll be fine. I promise you we don't bite, and you'll soon feel at home with us, I'm sure."

I smiled back at Hannah's bouncy and casual manner. It certainly was very different to what I was used to, but I liked it, and knew it wouldn't take me long to settle in and gel with the other girls here.

"Well, I'll leave you two girls to get acquainted, and maybe later, Hannah, you can show Julia around," said Miss Cardew, once again looking at me and offering one of her bright smiles.

"Sure thing, Miss Cardew," replied Hannah.

"We meet in the large hall for the evening meal at five thirty," Miss Cardew explained, turning to me. "Hannah will show you where it is; but for now, I expect you want to unpack and settle in a little. An introductory meeting for all new pupils will be held later on after tea, and we'll explain everything then. For now, just relax and enjoy yourself – I'll see you a bit later on!"

I found my voice at last. "Thank-you, Miss Cardew."

"You're welcome, Julia." With a parting encouraging smile, Miss Cardew left the room, and I was alone with Hannah.

At once Hannah began to speak to me in such a buoyant and confident tone it was as if she had known me for years. "The other girls who share this room are Tammy and Jas. You'll like them. They can be a bit weird at time – you know, very giggly and they say some strange and crazy things, but we all get along really well and you'll soon get used to it. Don't look so serious, Julia – they're great girls, really they are!"

My face had betrayed my feelings again! I had been concerned when Hannah said that the girls could be a 'bit weird' and wondered what she had meant by that. Clearly my face had defined what I had been thinking.

I must learn to control my emotions, especially in front of other people! I thought, chiding myself. "I'm sorry if I appear a bit gauche," I said, colouring a little. "It's just that this is a whole new experience for me, and I feel a bit . . . well . . ."

"Nervous?" Hannah offered.

"Yeah," I agreed, relieved that she understood what I meant.

"You're bound to at first," said Hannah sensitively. "That will soon wear off. You'll soon feel pretty easy around us – I learnt that when I first came here two years ago. Hey – do you want the top bunk or the bottom?" she asked, gesturing towards the bunk bed on the right. "Tammy and Jas have the bunk bed on the left, but this one is ours. Where would you prefer to sleep?"

No one had ever asked me what I would like before. My opinion and desires had never been thought of or solicited in my whole life – I had always just done what I was told and gone along with the wishes of the people around me. "Ummm . . ." I hesitated, not quite sure how to answer. "Where do you normally sleep?"

"Oh, I don't really care where I sleep," replied Hannah nonchalantly. "It doesn't really matter to me. I can sleep anywhere, believe me! You're the new girl here – you choose."

Although I really appreciated Hannah's kind attempts to making me feel at home, I confess I felt rather uncomfortable at having to make the decision. "Can I have the bottom?" I eventually asked, after a long pause.

"Sure thing! Now, would you like a hand to unpack?"

I was so moved by this new-found thoughtfulness and kindness in a person, which was completely unfamiliar to me, that it touched my heart profoundly, and stirred within me all the longing and desire I had pent up there for years for a true friend with whom I could really share my heart. For a moment, I couldn't speak, for a slight throb had caught in my throat; but hurriedly clearing it away, I replied with a grateful smile, "Thanks, Hannah."

"No problem," said Hannah, who seemed to be studying me carefully. I could feel her pensive eyes upon me and began to colour with embarrassment. I think she sensed my discomfiture of the situation and averted her eyes off me for a moment, and stooping down to help me take my clothes out of my case, said in a bright tone, "We all share a wardrobe, but each of us have one drawer each to ourselves in that small chest of drawers over there. You can put some of your stuff in there, and just use the wardrobe for hanging up the clothes that really need it. The other things can just be folded away in the drawer. Here – you can have the bottom one for putting your stuff in."

I will take this moment to describe the room to you. I still remember it vividly now, and with such fond memories that it still brings a slight tear to my eye now as I recall the happy times I spent there.

The room was not very large, but big enough to occupy four young girls who would mainly spend their time sleeping, dressing and doing homework in, so it filled the purpose quite well. I shall illustrate the room from the perspective as you enter in through the door, which was the way I first saw it all those years ago when I first arrived: As you already know there were two bunk beds, one on each side of the room. Between the head of the two bunk beds was a spacious window with a sill, and it afforded an agreeable view of the back of the school, so we had the marvellous outlook of the fields which were used for the benefit of sports. Situated below the window was the chest of drawers, which came up in height just below the window-sill, so it fitted perfectly. The pine wardrobe stood tall and wide against the right wall, near the door which faced opposite the window. There was a narrow glass mirror, rectangular shaped, which hung on the left wall at the foot of the bunk bed, and a waste bin was placed under it, which collected all the rubbish we girls used to throw in there, whether it was sweet wrappers or disastrous essays we had written as homework, and would have to begin again!

As Hannah and I worked together, putting away my clothes and few possessions, I said something suddenly and quite out-of-the-blue, which was the beginning of sharing my heart quite openly and frankly with someone I actually felt comfortable with. "You know," I began, quite quietly, "I've never really had a friend."

Hannah looked at me, with what I perceived to be surprise mingled with sympathy. "Haven't you?"

I shook my head. "No."

"How come?"

That was when I first told Hannah my sad story: about the death of my parents, about my Aunt and three cousins and the misery I had suffered at their hands. I told her about Miss Hope, and about my love for books and learning, and even my dream of going to university after I had taken my A-Levels. Hannah listened quietly, without making so much as a single interruption during my entire speech. It felt so good and such a relief to be able to voice my feelings, and have someone who would listen and understand how I truly felt. I can't begin to describe the release I felt after keeping those feelings, thoughts and emotions locked up inside me for so many years.

When I had finished speaking, I could see that Hannah's eyes glistened more than they had before. She swallowed hard before giving my arm a gentle and sympathetic squeeze. "Thanks for telling me," she said.

I looked at her and struggled to steady my own voice as I replied, "Thanks for listening."

Hannah grinned again, and when she next spoke her voice was light and care-free. "Well, you have a friend in me, Julia. Now, how about a tour?"