Berries And Bimbos And Boobs, Oh My
It smells like bacon. Again. And for some reason I'm in the spare room. It's cold in here. I'm leaving. As soon as I feel awake enough to move. Could be here a while. Good thing I'm in the room with all the books I guess...
Too bad I don't actually end up reading anything. I just lay there for the good part of an hour, trying to convince myself that it was worth getting up for the bacon if nothing else. Which really shouldn't have been that hard considering it was bacon. There must really be something wrong with me.
When I do finally manage to do it and get a good look at the clock, I realize I'm awake at five in the morning. Why? Because bacon is that amazing. And totally worth being awake an hour early for.
Wandering into the kitchen, I find Ichigo running around trying to find something. I don't think I've ever seen a guy so eager to be in the kitchen (other than Zan, but he's just a freak of nature). It's just not normal. I don't know why, it just isn't. Not that I'm complaining. Far from it. For the first time in...I don't even know...there's actual food in this house. Flat. Whatever the fuck you wanna call it.
I watch him a little longer. He looks like he belongs there. I'm pretty sure he doesn't have spooky kitchen powers like Zangetsu does, but he just kinda...fits in.
Walking up to the counter I ask, "Exactly how long have you been up?"
Spinning around, he stares at me, surprised. "I swear to god one of these days you're going to give me a heart attack."
"Well, I guess it's a good thing I learned how to handle them," I replied, sitting down.
Turning back to the pan on the stove he asks, "Where the hell did you learn how to handle a heart attack?"
"You'd be surprised at the number of people that had health issues in the bar." He glances back at me questioningly. He looks cute when he tilts his head that way... "Let's see...there was the epileptic guy that showed up on disco night, the ten or so guys that had a heart attack due to the strippers, and that lady that choked on an olive because she forgot she was allergic. Though I never figured out why Stark had that epi-pen..."
Seriously. The lady starts choking, everybody freaks out, and Stark comes out from around the bar with an epi-pen. It saved her life...but what the hell? I even asked Harribel. She had no clue either. I'm not sure if I should be afraid or not.
Ichigo turned off the stove and put the plate of bacon on the counter. Awkward silence ensues. I assume we should talk about what happened last night, but neither of us really wants to start the conversation.
So we're obviously going out...but what does that entail exactly? Mostly I think I have the basics of that...maybe...
"So..." he says, avoiding my gaze.
"A needle pulling thread."
Now he just flat out stares at me. "What?"
"Sorry. I don't do well with awkward conversations. I tend to do stupid stuff. Like spout out lyrics from old movies." He keeps staring. "What?"
"I just...didn't think anyone watched movies like that anymore."
"Probably because it wasn't actually a good movie."
"Hey! I happen to like that movie!" he said, slightly offended.
"You like singing nuns and scary, dancing children?"
"Ok, I'll admit the nuns were kinda weird, but there was nothing wrong with those kids! Besides, it was a nice, cute, romantic movie," he replied, folding his arms over his chest defiantly.
"And three fucking hours long. Sorry, I was not going to listen to people sing and watch them dance for three hours. Hell, I could have half a book finished by that point."
"But your books have romance in them!"
"So? They don't sing and dance at me. And they're far more entertaining. The relationship goes somewhere faster."
Ichigo huffed and pouted. Without looking constipated. And he looked cute doing it. Made me wish I had my sketch pad...
At my staring he asked, "What?"
I shrugged. "You're cute."
He turned bright red and that scowl took it's place on his face. He reaches for the bacon and mumbles something about not being cute. He can lie to himself all he wants. Whatever floats his boat.
Not long after, Zan walks out, still half asleep. Which is weird because his hair is sticking up all over the place. You wouldn't think it possible with hair that long, but he somehow managed to do it. Maybe he really does have powers. I should ask him how they work. Maybe learn to turn invisible.
We sit there for about an hour, mostly making fun of each other's bed head (though I don't really think it applies to either me or Ichigo seeing as...well...it can't be tamed anyways) and eating bacon. By the time it's actually time to get ready to leave, none of us really want too. Good thing we all live together huh?
After getting ready and shoving our things together, we're about to leave when half of Ichigo's little group comes bursting through the front door. Boobzilla immediately stops in front of Ichigo, hands on her hips.
"Are you going to behave today, Ichigo?" she asked almost threateningly. It didn't seem to phase him.
Zangetsu leaned over and whispered, "She makes it sound like a bad porno."
I almost burst out laughing.
"The giant tits aren't helping," I whispered back. He nodded in agreement.
Turning back to the situation at hand, Ichigo looks confused. "What?"
"Are you going to stop being pissy?"
The gnome popped up out of nowhere and offered, "Because if you're not, we have ways of fixing that!" She was suddenly holding a rope. And smiling. And suddenly I didn't want to know how they were going to fix it. The earlier porno comment added with the current conversation just took my mind to a weird place.
"How'd you get the bruise?" Frodo cut in. Wow. I think Ichigo might have an actual friend among this crowd.
Ichigo brushes the bruise on his cheek. I guess he forgot about it. Dunno how though. It must hurt like a bitch. Ok seriously, who the fuck thinks up all this shit? "Hurts like a bitch"? How long ago was this made? Are we talking dog or woman? Because...well...ok, I guess if you piss them off enough they'd hit you and it would probably hurt...the dog would bite and I'm pretty sure she'd aim for the nuts. So either way you're screwed.
"It's nothing," he replied, dropping his hand. The bandaged one. That Boobzilla takes notice of.
"Oh my god! What happened? Did someone try to rape you? Are you ok? Are you still a virgin? It's ok if you're not! We'll still love you! Even if you do become a hooker!"
"Who said anything about being a hooker?"
"That's your first concern?" I ask. "Not even the fact that she thinks you were raped, the fact that she thinks you're gonna become a hooker? Way to set your priorities straight."
He turns around to glare at me, but it doesn't work too well because he's trying not to smile. I just smirk at him and start walking past his group. I'd rather not be late to school thank you. Zangetsu follows me out, as does everyone else.
After locking up, I start heading for the school, all the while listening to them try to bug the information out of him. I almost tried to save him with the whole, he fell down the stairs thing, but there's a few things wrong with that. One, I don't have stairs. Two, stairs don't usually bruise your cheek and your hand...
By the time we arrive at school, all they've gotten out of him was that he'd had a fight. I'm pretty sure I'm the only one that knows. Me and maybe Frodo. Or Taco Man. I dunno why, but it just seems like he and Ichigo would talk to each other about that kind of thing. I could be completely wrong.
Soon after arriving we're joined by Cirruci and the clown. We don't talk long because the bell rings. Thank god.
Art wasn't so bad. Though I still don't know what I'm going to turn in. Maybe I could get away with just turning in a bunch of sketches. Yeah right. It was a nice thought though.
Boobzilla's off in her corner, freaking out about how she was going to fail this first assignment. Frodo looked like he was falling asleep and Ichigo just looked like he was trying too hard. I just sat there and waited for the bell to ring. I'd figure something out at home.
The rest of the day went by pretty slowly. We weren't doing anything in most of my classes, and as per usual, lunch was the highlight of the day. Well, the school day anyways. I'm pretty sure something entertaining would end up happening back at my place as well. Just because they've taken to gathering there every chance they got.
The walk home was pretty quiet though. But not that weird uncomfortable silence. Just...silence. It was actually really weird. His group must really be affecting me.
Opening the door, I find Nel yelling at somebody over the phone. Looking up, she spots us and hesitates. She quickly mumbles something before heading off out the door. By this point I'm thoroughly confused.
Lifting the phone up to my ear, I say, "Hello?" closing the door behind me.
"Shiro?"
I froze.
Glancing behind me, I find Ichigo and Zangetsu sitting at the counter talking. I head down into my room and shut the door.
"What the hell do you want?" I hissed at him.
"Come on, that's no way to talk to your father."
"Either tell me what you want or hang up."
There was a long silence, and if not for his breathing, I would have sworn he'd hung up. "I need you to come back."
"No."
"Please, just-"
"I said no."
"If you don't come back, I swear to god I'll-"
"You'll what? Call the cops? Good luck with that," I said, frustrated. He needs to stop fucking calling me. And curiosity got the better of me. "What do you need me for this time?"
"So you'll-"
"I asked you a question, it doesn't mean shit," I sighed, running my fingers through my hair.
"There's something I need to talk to you about."
"So talk."
"I want to do it in person."
"Why, so you can push me around some more? Don't think so."
"It's not like that." I can hear someone mumbling in the background. He pulls the phone away from him and responds before coming back. "Listen, I really need to talk to you in person."
"And I refuse. Bye."
I hung up.
Walking out into the living room, I placed the phone in it's cradle, still pissed. I could hear Ichigo and Zangetsu talking in the kitchen. Meandering in I tell them, "Don't answer the phone."
Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Zan nudge Ichigo who just slightly shakes his head. I head out the back door and sit down in the chair.
I can hear muttering in the kitchen and soon after Ichigo follows me out. He looks worried...and nervous. Uncertain, he sits down next to me.
There was a long silence before he asked, "Are you ok?"
"Fine."
He rolls his eyes, looking over at me, "Obviously. That's why you're out here moping."
"Exactly."
He's quiet for a moment, as if thinking about something. Suddenly he's got his arms wrapped around me. And it feels...nice. Awkward with the chair arms between us. But nice nonetheless.
He didn't say anything after that. I think we both understood that nothing really needed to be said. It was just nice having each other around. Was this what it was like to be in a relationship with somebody? Because if this was part of it, maybe it wouldn't be so bad...
There are some very loud noises coming from somewhere nearby...and it's suddenly a lot darker than I remember it being...
Hell. I fell asleep again. But whatever I'm resting on is oddly comfortable...
Opening my eyes, I find myself in a sitting position. My head resting on someone's shoulder. Dunno who, but whoever it is is reading a really good book...wait...book. Looking up I find that I'd fallen asleep on Ichigo.
He didn't seem to mind. And I know I certainly didn't. But when the fuck had I fallen asleep?
Sitting up all the way, I stretch out before glancing inside. Yep. The circus managed to make it's way inside my house again. I don't see Zangetsu though. I wonder where he went.
"Hey."
Turning around I find Ichigo smiling at me. Not a big one. But a smile nonetheless. He looks really good when he does that. "How long have I been out?"
He glances at his phone. "A couple hours."
I can hear the phone going off inside. I sigh. Fuck. "How long's the phone been ringing?"
"A couple hours."
"Anybody answer it?"
"I think Orihime did, but you were asleep so she just hung up."
"Who?"
"Orihime." He looks at my still confused face. "Strawberry blonde with big boobs. Wears these hairpins all the time."
"Oh, the ditz."
He stares at me. I almost think he's insulted by my nickname for her until he starts laughing. Holy hell does he have a nice laugh.
"What?"
"I just...I've just never heard anyone call her that before," he managed to say past all his laughter.
"Well, fuck. I don't know her name."
"So you call her the ditz?"
"I don't know anyone's name. They all have some weird label."
He looks at me, genuinely curious. "Really? Like what?"
"The other big boobed one is Boobzilla, the short kid with white hair is Frodo, the tall creepy guy Cirruci hangs out with is the clown, the big Mexican looking one is Taco Man, the short blonde one that hits people is Crab Ass, the short black haired chick is the gnome, the blonde one is Carlisle, and the redhead is the pineapple zebra."
The entire time I'm naming them off, he's sitting there laughing his ass off. Glad I can amuse someone.
Trying to regain his breath he asks, "H-how do you come up with these?"
"Mostly it's appearance based."
"So who am I?"
"Hm?"
"If you have a nickname for everyone, then who am I?"
I stare at him for a minute. "I don't have one for you."
He seems surprised. "Why not?"
I shrug. "I just don't. You're just special I guess."
He blushes slightly at that. I just smile at him.
Suddenly Boobzilla comes out and tries to convince us to play whatever game it was they dragged out. Ichigo was laughing the entire time. I assume it's because now every time he looks at his friends, he's going to think of my stupid nicknames for them. Oh well.
She somehow manages to get him to play, but I just sit by and watch. And somehow watching them laugh and play with each other (don't make that dirty) just kinda...made all my problems disappear.
I watched them play for a few hours until they decided that it wasn't fair to have Zan playing. He just laughed and headed into the kitchen. I assume to make food, just because he and Ichigo are freaks of nature that way.
I follow him in and watch as he starts pulling out food, pots, and pans. I've always wanted to watch him work his spooky kitchen magic. Seriously, even as a kid he was scary fast at making food. Hell, even popcorn was done half as fast than when a normal person made it.
"So I take it you two made up?" he asks, not stopping what he was doing.
"What?"
"You and Ichigo."
"Oh, uh...yeah."
He just smiled at me and continued what he was doing. We talked as he worked and I swear he's hiding his kitchen magic, because he finished the food in a normal amount of time. Asshole.
By the time nightfall had arrived, people were already leaving. I just headed back down to my bedroom. They were pretty good about locking up after themselves.
When I got to my room I found that Zan wasn't there. Well, I guess if he wanted the spare room he could have it. Or the couch...but that's not really all that comfortable.
As I lay in bed waiting for sleep to come, I heard the door open quietly. There was the shuffling of feet before I felt someone lay down next to me. And it definitely wasn't Zangetsu. There was only one other person it could be.
Ichigo.
"You don't mind do you?" he asked nervously.
Looking in his general direction I reply, "Mind what?"
"My laying here."
"No."
It sounded like he'd breathed a sigh of relief. He shifted a little closer, but it wasn't enough to make a huge difference. I don't know why he's so shy about stuff like this.
Shifting onto my side, I use the arm I'm not laying on to pull him against me. It's strange being this close to someone else in bed. With so few clothes on. Fuck.
Ichigo seemed tense at first, but soon relaxed.
There was a long silence before he asked, "Who was on the phone?"
It was my turn to tense. Did I really want him knowing about that? Doesn't seem like I have much choice, because my mouth has a mind of it's own. "My dad."
"I take it you're not close."
"He wants to be. I don't."
"Why?"
"He's not exactly...happy...with me."
"So...kinda like my dad..."
"Less violent, more drunk."
He doesn't say anything after that. Just hugs me tighter. Maybe it's a sympathetic kind of thing, like he knows how I feel. But there are some major differences. Like the fact that I don't have any siblings. And his father doesn't want to pretend to be the perfect family. Or pick up hookers as far as I know. But the touch was appreciated regardless. It feels nice to just lay here like this.
Mmmm...It's warm. And it smells kinda nice. I snuggle closer to whatever it is, hoping to get more of it when it shifts. Oh. Right. Ichigo...he'll live.
I lay like that for who knows how long before Zan opens the door tells me to get up. I really fucking hate school sometimes. I don't know why we have to sit in a building that nobody wants to be in. Not even the instructors. That's just sad.
Finally willing myself to get up, I shook Ichigo awake and searched around my room for something semi clean. Guess it was time to do the laundry again...
By the time any of us get out the door, we realize that if we don't hurry, we're going to be late. So we end up running to school. And missing Cirruci. Maybe being late wasn't so bad after all. Sure I'd see her all throughout the day, but I didn't have to see her first thing in the morning.
Ichigo followed me into our first hour class, talking about different ideas he had for his project. Mostly he wanted an opinion, but I didn't really care.
"Do you know what you're doing for your project?" he asked as we walked into the classroom.
"Nope."
He just chuckles as he takes his seat. Boobzilla seems surprised. She leans over to Frodo and asks, "Do you think he's ok?"
Frodo just rolls his eyes and continues doing...whatever it was he was doing.
When Cirruci found me after class, she immediately latched onto me and started rambling about...I don't even know anymore.
"Shiro!" she whines, tugging on my arm.
"What?"
"Zangetsu are saying you and Ichigo made up."
"And?"
"And? What do you mean and? He's gonna steal you away from me!"
"When was I ever yours?"
She smacks me and walks away. Damn. The girl had an arm on her. Why was I the only one that was ever on the receiving end of it? Why couldn't it be someone else for a change?
Most of the day proceeded in much the same way. Cirruci would try and pull some stupid stunt to try and get Ichigo away from me. It was actually pretty amusing considering that Crab Ass or Boobzilla would come in and try to stop her. It earned us some pretty weird looks, but it was totally worth it.
And of course (because it's just my luck) right as everything's going well, it all turns to shit. Because who would be waiting for me but my father, the last person in the world I ever wanted to see?
I feel like my chapters are getting shorter...I don't like it...oh well...I need to work on my other fics...DAMN YOU PLOT BUNNIES!
Credit goes to Redfaerie for helping me out. Other than that, there's nothing. But Thanks for reading.
By the way, I have given Redfaerie permission to rewrite this from Ichigo's point of view. It's being written as we speak. Check it out when it gets posted