The hum of the car was drowned out by the beats of rain making a gentle music outside. Gokudera would have preferred that Ryohei turned on the radio, to try and drown out nature's noise, but the man clearly wanted to talk. He just didn't quite know how to start. But when the married man figured out how, the surprise hit Gokudera like the man had just struck him with his fist. Hurt just as much too.
"We have to stop this," Ryohei said, eyes focusing on the watery road.
Gokudera felt like there was a clump in his throat, he tried to swallow it, but it was no good. He couldn't start crying again. Nothing to blame it on in the car.
"Wh-Why?" He choked out, attempting to sound unaffected and failing.
"What do you mean 'why?'" The retort came out as weird mixture. An angry laugh. "You know why."
"But why now?" Gokudera whined. Directly afterward, he wished that he could have taken the words back or at least said them without sounding like a little bitch. "Why not earlier?" He said more softly, sadder.
"What difference would it make?" Ryohei said.
"You should've did this before this point…."
"When? There was no time to—!" He stopped and collected himself. He didn't want to yell. A red light. He looked out the window as Gokudera stared at the face he had loved so much. He let one tear fall then wiped it away quickly.
"We fell so deep in love so fast," Ryohei admitted. "But I didn't… I couldn't accept that. I had to marry Hana. I had to start family. Be normal. I had to run from you," He turned to look at Gokudera, gently touching the other man's face. "But I couldn't. Nothing I did made me forget you. And at this point my love's too dangerous."
Gokudera's brow furrowed deeply to the point of pain, adding on to his current aches. He pulled away from Ryohei and gazed out the front window, wishing he could discern if rain was just fogging up the window, painting it into a blur or if he was really unable to keep more tears from building up before his filmy eyes.