A/N: Hello my lovely readers, how are ya? Thank you so much for all the support and reviews. Well, here is a new chapter, and I hope you like it.
This is an important news. Ok, for those of you who are confused, I'm going to let you know how the chapters are taking place with the episodes. Chapter 12 takes place in episode 6 "Hard Hearted Hannah." This is the episode where Jason and Luke are asked to build a platform. This happens while Anna was in the cage with Godric. On the same day, Anna finds out about Claire and passes out. And not long after, Sookie and Hugo come to the church to spy. I thought it would probably explain why Godric didn't respond when Sookie was crying out for him and Bill when Steve was dragging her into the basement. Poor Godric, he had his heart broken.
And chapter 13 takes place also in "Hard Hearted Hannah" just at night. After Anna and Sarah's fight, Sarah goes to the church crying, which is where she finds Jason and well, you know what happens then.
This chapter takes place in the morning season 2, episode 7, "Release Me," just before the whole craziness takes place.
P.S: Ok I want to say thank you to all reviewers, downbelowgirl, kingdomfantasyanime453, caleb's babe, Tsumi, DarkAngel620, salt234, wolviegurl, Cara Elyse, Rose of the Dawn, mixmatched9, Verbophobic, TheSilverKey, Green-Eyed-Wolf9324, Nemishysteria, InTiMaTeLoVeRfOrEvEr, WickedBlue. And don't forger my readers. Thank you soo much and love ya.
Disclaimer: nothing you read here belongs to me except for some of the plot and unknown characters you will meet. All belongs to True Blood, an American television drama series created and produced by Alan Ball. It is based on The Southern Vampire Mysteries by Charlaine Harris.
Enjoy:)
You are the world within the world that I exist.
You are the touch that just won't fade.
You are the end and beginning of each and every day.
You are the reason I stay sane.
It's hard to see beautiful
Oh it's hard to see beautiful in your own eyes
But you make me beautiful
For the very first time.
Does anybody know what it's like
To feel larger than life
To look deep in your soul
And know you're not alone
Does anybody know how it feels
To find somethin' that's real
And make it your own
That's when you know that you found home.
Home - Katharine McPhee
Chapter Fourteen - Listen to Your Heart
"In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing," said Theodore Roosevelt. But what if you have no choice? What if your freedom to decide is taken from you? Then What?
The thought of what happened last night kept running in my head. I'm leaving. I'm leaving whether I like it or not. My plane leaves in less than 15 hours, and I'm going to be on it.
The bible says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take." And for the first time of my life, I'm afraid of which path god will choose for me. I'm afraid of the inevitable changes that seemed to be rushing my way.
I sat on my bed folding my clothes and placing them neatly in my enormous suitcase. Since Last night, my room has been a mess; clothes and boxes full of stuff was everywhere. Well, at least the things I decided not to take.
I have restrained myself from crying any longer. I decided to be strong and take everything that comes my way. And for a little while, it seemed to work, my tears have stopped running. Even though my inside still bleeds, still pains every time I think of Claire, but now, there was more urgent matters to take my head off of her.
Last night, Sarah never came home after she left running out of my room in tears. So did Steve. I assumed they probably have stayed at the church. Its late afternoon right now, and they're still not back, not that I'm worried, it's just the house was too quiet without them, and right now quietness is the last thing I needed.
As if reading my mind, there was a soft tap on my door, which broke my thought. I slowly looked up from the folding my hands subconsciously seemed to be doing. It was Helen that stood by my door, her hands carrying a tray. "Hey, how are you feeling?" She asked as she invited herself in and placed the tray on the small table I had by my bed. The tray contained two cups of tea and freshly baked muffins—guessing from the steam coming off of it.
She didn't wait for me to reply before she continued, "You haven't eaten a thing since yesterday, sweetie. I thought we could have tea together, hmmm, what do you say?" She asked in a sweet motherly tone. I couldn't help but smile softly at her, even though the smile never reached my eyes. I placed the neatly folded shirt into the suitcase, and slowly pushed the unfolded clothes that took most of my bed aside to make room for her to sit. She picked up a muffin and came to sit facing toward me. She handed me the muffin, and I took it with a slightly shaky hand.
"So, you decided to go haa?" She questioned her eyes glancing around. I swallowed and cleared my throat to relieve the dryness that I seemed to have from all the crying I did last night, before answering. "I have no choice." I whispered looking up at her from the food in my hand.
"Oh sweetie, don't let Steve dictate your life. Maybe… maybe this is what you want. Maybe in the back of your mind, you are having second thoughts. You are doubting whatever reason you have here to stay." She said, brushing my hair back and tucking it behind my ear. I only have one reason to stay. The only reason for wanting to stay is Godric. It's true; I want to go as far away as I can from Steve and Sarah. It's true, I want a fresh start somewhere new. But if there is any doubt in my life, Godric is the last thing. I have no trace of doubt about Godric what's so ever.
"No. No, you're wrong. I am certain this is where I need to be." I spoke my voice coming out slightly stronger. She seemed happy with my answer as her eyes brightened a bit. "Well, you need to stand up to him then. I have known Steve since he was just a boy, and one thing Steve has is determination. He is a brick head. He doesn't care who he has to walk over to get what he wants. And I know it is in your nature to take whatever it is thrown at you. I know you are all about giving the other cheek, but Anna, you are just making yourself an easy target. Enough is enough." Her voice held a frustration that I have never seen in her. It was as if she wants to smack me and yell, "wake up!"
"I don't know what to do Helen, like you said; it is not in my nature. Help me please!" my voice was louder as the tears came rushing again. Helen paused for a second to regain herself before she launched herself forward to pull me in a hug. Well, so much for no more crying. I wrapped my arms around her and held her tight, like my life depend on it. Helen has been like the mother I never had. She is the only one who scowls at me like a mother, or who gets worried over whether I eat or not. She was someone with the mother's touch.
"I don't know what to say, honey. This is a decision you have to make on your own. What I say, or what Steve says won't matter in the end. This is your life Anna, you need to take charge. All I can say is, listen to your heart, it's usually known to be the best adviser." She spoke softly as her hands moved up and down my back in a comforting way. I rested my head on her shoulder and closed my eyes.
That was the sad part about my life. What my heart wants, I could never seem to get. "What I want, Helen, what my heart wants is to be in the cage, where my reality exists. Where I feel free. Where I feel home. Where I am… me." My voice came out as a whisper. I want to be with him. He is the one who could fix this, who could make this ok.
Helen yanked me forward to look at my face; it was as if I told her I want to jump of a bridge. She looked shocked, as her eyes were wide like a dinner plate, her mouth dropping to the floor. Slowly her face came to relax, and her eyes seemed to glow. It was as if she discovered a lost treasure or something. "Oh… my… god. I mean I had a hunch, but I didn't expect it to be like this." She whispered like she was talking to herself.
Now it was my turn to look lost, "what are you talking about, Helen?" I asked giving her a quizzical look. Her smile seemed to get wider at my question. "You want to be with the vampire." She said in a low voice like it was a secret. I couldn't help but feel my face get hot, as a blush crept up my cheeks. Even though what she said came out as a statement, I replied with a nod anyways, looking anywhere but her face. Her hands let go of my shoulders she was still holding in a light grip.
"Why don't you tell me about him… about this young vampire?" She motioned with her hands as if asking me to elaborate. I laughed to myself at the fact that she called Godric young. Even though Helen was in her early fifties, I'm sure Godric will probably call her, "child" if they meet.
"First of all, he is not young, at all. Well he looks young, but he is actually over 2000 years old." I smiled looking up at her. She looked stunned at the fact that my new crush is ten times her age and her family combined together. It took her a moment to relapse before she raised her eyebrow at me in a very Godric like fashion. "Well, you know I don't mind you dating an older guy, but 2000 years old, damn Anna… is it even legal to be that old?" both of as broke out in a soft chuckle at her joke.
"Oh how I wish you could meet him, Helen. He is like nothing you ever seen. He is so smart, sweet, gentle and kind. He is just so beautiful all around." I couldn't help but let out a dreamy sigh before continuing. "When I'm around him, it is like I'm flying, like every fiber in my body is alive. When he talks, his voice is the sweetest melody that I could listen to until the end of time. Its like for the first time I'm learning to breathe, Helen." I pressed my hands where my heart is. It seems like even talking about him makes my heart want to beat out of my chest.
"Yep. It seems my conclusion is right. You got it bad, Annie. You're in love." She stated happily, like she was watching one of her weird romance novels coming to life. In a year and half I known her, one thing is for sure. Helen was a sucker for a good romance, even if it was with a 2000 year old vampire.
"I don't know what you're talking about. I am not in love with him." I spoke stubbornly shaking my head while crossing my arms. I mean I would know if I was in love, wouldn't I? There is no way I'm in love with a vampire. Not that anything is wrong with them; in fact they are quite fascinating. I have known Godric for like three weeks or so. Even though we spent every waking moments of that time, it is still not enough time to fall in love with someone.
"You are crazy Helen; I don't even know him that long." I stated continuing persistently. She didn't say anything except stare at me with sparkle in her eyes. "Yes you are, sweetie. I have noticed small signs for quite a while now. I just didn't think you were this far gone." She stated her smile getting wider by the moment. Her statement seems to make my heart beats double in speed. My hands were shaking and starting to sweat. Helen seems to be aware of this because she stretched her hand to firmly grasp mine.
"Signs? What kind of signs are you talking about?" My question came out as murmur. Helen hummed as her other hand tapped on her chin as if she was thinking. "Well, for starters, I have never seen you this happy. Your eyes sparkle every time you talk about him. As long as I have known you, and as beautiful as you are, you have always been the kind of girl who never comes out of her shell. Well, until now. I think he is good for you, Anna." She said using her motherly tone.
"But love takes time—" before I could finish what I was saying she cut me off. "Aww, sweetie, you don't have to know someone long to love them. I fell in love with my husband after knowing him for two weeks." she paused as her eyes losing the sparkle she had seconds ago. From what Sarah told me her husband died three years ago. She said he had cancer. I couldn't help but sympathized with her. After all, I lost my mother to cancer too. I tightened my grip on her hand, somehow hoping it would comfort her. She looked up smiling back up again. "…and I married him a month later. And look at us now; we would have been married for 30 years if it wasn't..." She let out a sigh before continuing. "What I'm trying to say is Annie, sure, love takes time often, but there is the other kind of love, which time has nothing to do with it. The kind of love, where you just… love, and it's the rarest of all. And I think sweetie, you have been in love with him since you first met him." it was like someone just smacked me with a baseball bat.
Who am I kidding; of course I'm in love with him. It has been like this since our first conversation. Everything seemed to play in my head like I was watching TV. His small touches, his sweet way of comforting me, like the time I cried on him. The way how he makes me laugh. Like no matter how bad it was, he makes everything seem ok. They way he looks at me, like I'm the best thing to ever grace the planet. The way he kissed me, like I could give him everything he ever wanted in just one single kiss. He makes me feel… beautiful.
"I am in love with him." I said it more to myself than Helen, but she seemed happy none the less.
"Do you think I should tell him?" I asked looking up at Helen. There seemed to be this adrenaline running through me, I was beyond excited and scared at the same time. "Hmm, I don't know. If you think it is the right time." She said thoughtfully. I was imagining what it would be like to tell him, how he would react to it. That was when it hit me. What if he doesn't love me back? What if what I feel for him is one sided? What would I do then? How would, my already broken heart, take it? Knowing Godric, he will probably let me down easily.
Helen must have noticed the panic rising in me because she grasped my hand tightly again, "I can already see what you're thinking, and trust me, he probably feels the same way." She said smiling with absolute guarantee. But that did nothing to ease the alarming feelings that seemed to swarm in my head.
"But… but what if he doesn't love me back?" I questioned needing more reassurance. "Well, then he is a fool. There is no one in their right mind that wouldn't love you." She declared confidently. Her smile was just so bright, making her face glow, like what she said was the utter truth. I couldn't help, but believe her. I gave her a radiant smile as a thank you for her kind words. She was right; when the time comes, I will have to be the one to tell him. And pray to god, and hope somehow he will return my feelings. I sat back comfortably on my bed and let out a sigh.
Yep, I'm telling Godric I love him.
A/N:Thanks for reading and i hope you like it. Please, please reviews
see you next time:D