A/N: Hello my lovely readers, I hope you enjoy my last chapter. Thanks for all the reviews, which is why I'm updating soon. My midterm is actually next week, in three days, I know I should be studying, but I'm updating for you guys. So let me know what you think. here is the new chapter I hope you like it. Oh please listen to the song at the bottom, it is meant for this chapter.
P.S: I will like to say thank you too all my sweet reviewers, Undertaker's Hattress , Katara Melody Cullen, BerNorthman , ShiloCoulter , Nocturnal Rose, MissLuLu2010 , princess moon shadow , Lady Minuialwen , Rebecca, BadNicol8, mixmatched9 , JustGiveGodricAHug, Cierra, FoxDemonGrl , odeepblue , hellasweet , DarkAngel620 , Alison, meandI, k180, ClosureForKat , scorpiustar, wolviegurl , psalmofsummer , Adids14 , i luv hardy , trestreschic , guest reader, stina222 , MichelleCassidy , RememberTheMuse , Rose. I also want to say thank you to all my readers as well.
Disclaimer: nothing you read here belongs to me except for some of the plot and unknown characters you will meet. All belongs to True Blood, an American television drama series created and produced by Alan Ball. It is based on The Southern Vampire Mysteries by Charlaine Harris.
enjoy!
I'm out on the edge and I'm screaming my name
like a fool at the top of my lungs
sometimes when I close my eyes I pretend I'm alright
but it's never enough
cause my echo, echo
is the only voice coming back
my shadow, shadow
is the only friend that I have
listen, listen
I would take a whisper if
that's all you have to give
but it isn't, isn't
you could come and save me
try to chase it crazy right out of my head
I don't wanna be down and
I just wanna feel alive and
get to see your face again once again
Just my echo, my shadow
you're my only friend
Echo by Jason Walker
Chapter Twenty Nine - Bring Me to Life
One would think after all the people I lost; I would have some idea of what it would be like to die. But to be honest, I have never really given much thought about death, nor the act of dying. I guess that comes with being young, having so much ahead, so much to live for. But when I always hear people describing death; they say "your entire life flashes before your eyes," or at least something like that. But it didn't happen to me. I didn't see pieces of my childhood—like the first time I rode a bike, or my first day in kindergarten. I didn't see anything…period.
It was all darkness; never ending darkness seemed to spread. Underneath, above me, all-around me—all dark. I stood there as if I was floating, nothing seem to be beneath my feet, like I was standing on air. I felt lost and thoughtless, empty minded.
Just when I thought I was sucked into a black hole, there was a sound. It was natural, as if the sound of my own voice, or my own heartbeat. I didn't know what the sound was, it was far too distance, far too low, but I got a sense it felt at peace. I closed my eyes and just listened to the sound, I felt it was pulling me out of the top of my head, and the further I moved, the clearer the tone became.
The sound, it was a humming I noticed, sweet, almost childish melody. I had the impression that I heard it before, in fact I know it so well, I could probably hum with it.
"Claire?" I called out in surprise recognizing her sweet childlike voice. The humming, it was her. The darkness around me seemed to mold into a shaft, and I wanted to be afraid, at least that should have been my first reaction, but instead I was met with a complete and utter peace filling my heart, reaching out to me, calling me to my very soul.
I wandered down the dark shaft, following the voice of my dead sister with no fear, even though I couldn't see where I was going. All of the sudden there was this very little tiny pinpoint of light at the end of the black hole, which kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger. The light was incredibly bright, like sitting in the middle of a light bulb.
It was so bright that I put my hands in front of my face fully expecting to see what's behind, but I could not. And the humming, it was as clear as day now as it echoed around the shaft. I couldn't explain it, but I felt as if she wanted me to come to her. She wanted me to be with her.
I felt it deep within my heart, something warm, comforting, peaceful, loving… it wasn't just her, but my father, my mother, my grandparents and their grandparents… all my ancestors, they wanted me to be with them, all of them. And it felt like after a long journey, I was finally home. I couldn't help but hesitantly reach out toward the light. I wanna be home. My hands reached out farther longingly, and just before I could touch it, there was a voice that made me freeze.
"Come back to me, Anna… come back… come back." It was coming from the darkness, the other side of the shaft. It was a heartbreaking, desperate voice that called out for me. For a moment I didn't know who this person was, but my heart responded before my brain. It thumped against my ribs faster than ever before, it was as if it wanted to beat out of my chest and ran back to the voice. Memories seemed to flash in my head in unstoppable speed like a broken recorder. Cool soft kisses, feathery touches, quite laughs, loving words, warm silver blue eyes… how could I possibly forget? I have so much to live for, even though I desperately wanted to be with them, it's just not my time yet.
"Godric?" My voice broke everything like it was a piece of glass. The shaft, the darkness, the light, all disappeared like a dust in a wind. Instead, I was sucked back, my lungs hurt to breathe and my eyes shot open. My head was disoriented, lost and felt like I needed to throw up.
I blinked a few times forcing my eyes to work properly, before my dazed sight settled on a person that was hovering above me. It took a few second for my eyes to focus on the young looking vampire that was staring at me with so much emotions playing in his bloody eyes. What's going on? The thought echoed in the back of my head as my eyes roam around my surrounding, noticing I was back at the hotel room, lying on our comfortable bed. My sight settled back on the vampire, "godric?" I called out.
"My Anna," there was a relief in his voice as he pulled me to him. I groaned in pain, everything still ached, my throat, my face, my ribs, it all throbbed. My pain filled moan seemed to make Godric pulled me closer and wrap his arms around me, his alert eyes studying my face. It was only at that moment that I realized just how much his hands were shaking.
Ignoring it all, my mind went on full drive and that was when it all came back to me. Toney, the big cowboy man… the stabbing. I was stabbed.
I pulled back from Godric, my eyes immediately going toward my stomach to see the wounds, but instead I was met with the display of my pink sleeveless shirt ripped opened, completely exposing my bra, and Godric's bloody hand was pressed to where my wounds should have been. I should be dead, and covered in multiple stabbing wounds, but my skin was back to normal, well except for the blood part. That was when it all clicked, Godric must have tried to heal me, but I must have been passed out, almost dead to even swallow his blood, and he, being the quick thinker, must have applied his blood directly to the stabbing.
"You're ok, Anna, I'm here… I'm here." The vampire whispered comfortingly, and he continued to whisper in a different language as he pulled me closer to him again. He drew his hand back from my stomach and brought it to his lips. His fangs SNAPPED out, a reminder of who he is, before he bit onto his wrist, piercing his skin. His dark crimson blood oozed out as he gently brought it to my lips.
"Drink," he commanded, and at that moment everything hurt too much for me to be disgusted at the fact that I'm drinking blood. My jaw ached, but I forcibly open my mouth none the less and took it all in. It's sugary, metallic taste flew down my throat in a sweet blazing sensation.
I closed my eyes and felt the blood running through my system, healing everything that needed to be. His 2000 year old blood worked like magic, my broken nose, my busted lips, bruised cheeks and jaw, beaten and broken rips… all healed within seconds. The next time I opened my eyes I felt like I was back to my original self, if not better. Well at least physically I was better, but mentally I felt like I just went through war.
I looked up into his waiting face and smiled at him reassuringly, before lifting my hands up to cup his cheeks. "I'm fine." I murmured moving my hands to embrace him completely. There was a second of pause; his fingers brushed the disheveled curls away from my eyes and face before he lowered his lips to mine. Despite my thoughts still being somewhat muddled and hazy, I welcomed his cool kiss and his protective hold as I lost myself to his yearning mouth. Somewhere in the middle of the kiss, I noticed that even his lips were trembling harshly, as the taste of his natural sweet lips was mangled with his blood.
"That was too close… way too close." He said when he pulled back. It had definitely been far to close in becoming a disaster. And I could see it in Godric's tensed eyes as unbidden images of what might happen flashed through his mind. "I was so afraid," I mumbled burying my face in his shirt.
"I know… but you're ok now." He replied brushing my hair back again letting out a long sigh. With that said, he lifted me up, his hands sliding behind my knees and upper back. For a few moments I felt oddly weightless in his arms, as he took me straight to the bathroom. He cautiously set me down on the closed toilet before turning toward the rather large bathtub and turned the water on.
As the water filled the tub, without even a moment of hesitation, he grabbed my torn pink shirt pulling it off my shoulders. I stared up at him confused, my face turning red. He didn't even look at the fact that I'm only wearing a bra, but he immediately moved to my jeans, giving it the same treatment as he yanked it off my legs. I just set there my face looking like a tomato, my mouth slightly shocked open. I shook my head at my perverted-ness, I'm sure Godric hasn't even given a thought at fact that I'm almost naked here, he is probably shaken up and worried for me, but all I could think about is my nudeness and his closeness.
"Come on," he said, lifting me up and placing me down in the warm water, which immediately turned reddish color from all the dried blood sticking on my body. "I will go prepare you a change of clothe," with that said he left the bathroom.
I just sat there watching the still water, my head replaying what happened earlier today over and over again. I pulled my knees to my chest, enfolding my arms around it. I couldn't help but realize how short life could be, one minute everything could be full of life and colorful… and then the next gone. The whole incident made me realize just how short my life is and that how much I need to live life for the moment. I am not the same person I use to be just a few months ago. I'm not the same weak little girl anymore. I didn't know how long I sat in the bathtub, an hour, maybe two; all I know is that I couldn't keep track of time. But my thoughts seemed to center on one thing; almost dying gave me a new perspective on everything I thought was right.
By the time I got out of the tub, the water was cold and my skin was wrinkly like a dry fruit. I wrapped myself with a large towel that was hanging on the door hook and slowly saunter toward the bedroom. I don't know why but the room felt oddly quiet, well that was until my eyes landed on Godric who was sitting on the bed, his head buried in his hands. He seemed to be frozen there, un-breathing, unmoving. I stared at him for a second before I let out a sigh and slowly walked toward him, sitting beside him on the warm clean bed. He had changed the sheets that had been tainted with my blood, and he also had set up a change of clothe for me, a comfortable sweatpants and a tank top.
My hands slowly snaked around him and made a concentrated effort to pull him, which he let me. He pressed his face in the crook of my damp neck, as if trying to feel the warmth of my body. "Godric, I'm alright. Everything is going to be ok." I voiced my fingers sifting through his hair comfortingly, before sliding across his cheek bone like a black velvet curtain. I gently caressed the smooth path of his right shoulder, broad with muscle and tight with tension that could be visible in his expression.
"I brought you this pain, haven't I?" He questioned his voice almost un-hearable. The thought of this sadness in his voice made my heart ache. It was faint in his voice, but swam along side with a deep wary tone, like an undercurrent. It seemed to have swept me under, filling my mouth and lungs with the hints that he waited to hear the very worst, no matter how painful it was. "No, of course not. Sometimes things just happens whether it's for bad or good."
He closed his eyes tightly, as if someone had taken a hold of his heart and squeezed it so tightly that the muscle fluttered in his chest with desperation. "I felt your pain, each and every second of it. I felt your heart slow down and…" he paused only to loll his head back a bit. My eyes subconsciously wandered over his throat, tracing over his Adams apple. "With all the power I possess… I never felt so helpless."
"That's part of being alive, being human." Even if he was a vampire, we all will experience helplessness at least once in our lifetime. The orange glow from the light made him look balmy, like there was an almost a sensual flame radiating off of him. I caressed his cheeks; his velvet smooth skin on the back of my hand felt virtually… warm.
"Beside if I had a chance; I wouldn't change a thing about what happened today." I voiced strongly which made him look up. "Because it made me realize how much I would have regretted my life if I never had the chance to tell you…" I took a deep breath, readying myself for all the possibilities. "If I never got to tell you how much I—I…" before I could finish my sentence, a loud knock on our main door sounded. I cursed under my breath, damn whoever interrupted us.
The tapping continued persistently, and Godric got up before marching out of the room. What the hell is going on? I thought when I heard voices coming from the living room. I quickly got dressed, yanking my clothing on before rushing out of the room. I was shocked beyond repair when I saw who our guests were.
It was Isabel that stood behind the door dressed in a complete black leather that sort of made her look like catwoman. She gave Godric a nod before she motioned with her hand to someone as if to indicate for them to enter. It was a young vampire with a chin length dark hair and pale blue eyes that came through; it wasn't his striking good looks that had me flabbergasted though, but what he was dragging with him. There stood Toney and the cowboy man, Chris, with the vampire's hand wrapped around the back of their neck. "One of these fuckers made a 911 phone call, it was pretty easy to sniff em' out after that." The man laughed, his fingers digging in their neck. I didn't know what to expect, except stand there like a brainless dummy doll with my mouth wide open.
Toney flinched before looking up, catching my shocked wide eyes. At that moment he broke down in tears, "oh, thank god you're alive. I didn't know wha—oh thank God." He cried out his hand silencing his sob, his tears making tracks down his cheeks. The long hair vampire threw them forward, both Toney and Chris landed on there knees a few feet from Godric.
"As you requested Godric, but the third one couldn't make it," informed Isabel in her Spanish accent, her voice quite serious. My head shot toward the older vampire, my thought running wild. Did he order for them to be brought here? The third one… did she mean the tattoo guy? What happened to him? Did he die?
"Anna, please forgive me," it was Toney who spoke as he crawled toward me. "I don't care if I die tonight or not, I just want you to know it was never my intention to bring any harm upon you. I just wanted to save you… I just wanted to save you." His tears kept on running down his cheeks, and the look on his face made my stomach tight.
"Shut the fuck up, you pussy." Cowboy Chris spoke, his foul words directed toward the younger human, who was still weeping.
"You shut the fuck up; this is all your fault." Toney counteracted, his eyes looking like he wanted to murder the man if he could. He bit his bottom lip, before turning his head back to me, "What happened…I just want you to know that my intentions were good. It was supposed to be an act; Chris was supposed to scary you off into leaving the vampire. I didn't think he would go crazy like that."
"And I would do it again in a heart beat, if it means taking out bitches like her," replied Chris in my place, but before anyone could say anything else, the long hair vampire spoke addressing toward both human men.
"Both of you shut the fuck up before I rip your throats off. Ugh… humans, what a pathetic creatures." He mumbled the last part to himself.
I didn't know what to say, except move toward Godric, whispering my question. "Godric, what's going on?" When I looked up at his face, I was taken aback by what I saw. His face looked different, somewhat harsh, his cheekbone tight and hollow. His eyes were darker, the sparking glow he always possessed were gone. He didn't look like the vampire I have come to love. Godric pushed me a side without replying as he stepped forward toward the two human men. My hands were shaking, as he approached Chris, and stared him down.
"Go ahead and kill me, you think I'm afraid of you? Go ahead and do what you did to my Lisa." He spit at Godric's feet. "Now that I know you want her," he motion with his head toward me. "I will never stop. I will feel her blood in my hands, feel her heart stop, rip her body apart, like your kind did to my woman." He was screaming now, "I will make you feel the pain I felt." His eyes were blazing wildly. I watched Godric's stiff back, as my heart banged against my ribs. Some how I knew what was coming, but I couldn't move my feet.
"Anna," it was Isabel that addressed me. I didn't know when she came toward me, but her hand softly landed on my cheek, pushing my face aside. "Look away, Anna." She ordered pulling me to her. At that instant moment, I heard a sickening crack. My head shot forward, and I watch in a slow motion as Chris's large body thump to the ground. I took a staggered step back while my lover's action fought its way into my head. My chest felt tight and constricted, as though I could not take in enough air simply through breathing. My hands griped my mouth muffling the cry that ripped out of my throat. Godric just killed a man. And I am the caused of this man's death.
This was the beast in Godric, the cruel, ruthless, emotionless killer he had informed me about over and over again. Godric has always been so human in my eyes, but I knew there was the vampire side of him. But I never fully comprehended the extent of his other side, nor did it registered to me until now. My tears fell on my cheeks like rain, as he turned toward Toney. I don't know why, but at that moment my frozen legs moved forward like a lightning, wrapping my arms around my vampire tightly, stopping him in mid step. "Please don't Godric! I beg of you, please don't." I cried burying my face in his back. As if it's possible my arms got tighter around him. Why is this happening?
"Is this the man you love, Anna?" Spoke Toney, his eyes set on the dead body of his friend. "Is this what you chose?" His words completely caught me off guard? How do I answer that? Not to mention he just basically told Godric that I loved him. "You don't know what you're talking about." I replied releasing Godric and standing in front of him, like a barrier between them.
"Yes I do. It is obvious, but you are just too blinded by what you feel for him to see clearly what he is truly." His voice was rough, as he slowly rose from where he knelt. "I don't care if he kills me tonight, but you have to know that you are never going to be enough for him." Toney's words were like a jabs of knifes, and the pain it caused were worse than the stabbing I received earlier.
"You are a beautiful girl, who is smart and kind. Any men would gladly die for you, including me, but you are making the worse mistake of your life. He would suck the life out of you; even then you won't be enough." His words shouldn't scare me, but it did.
"I don't care, this is what I want, and I'll appreciate it if you stop. Just stop." I replied stepping toward him. I don't need this lecture; I know what I'm getting myself into. Godric is what I want, forever, until the day I die.
"You have to hear it," Toney's eyes moved to Godric, "your vampire has to hear it. You might not care now, but in 20 years from now, when you'll start looking like his mother, in 50 years from now, when you'll start looking like his grandmother, oh, you will care then, trust me. What will you have then? No husband, no children, no grandchildren. You will be all alone, while he will be out there looking for someone who is appropriate for him. You still have a chance to leave, Anna, this is your time. Don't sacrifice everything that's beautiful about being human for him. You are giving up everything, while he loses nothing. How is that fair?" His voice was pleading for me to understand, see his point. And I do. This was a topic I have been dreading, pushing a side. A topic I never want to think about. I know what I am; I know what will come someday, but Godric is worth it.
"Please stop." I begged as I stared at him my tears falling from my eyes, making my sight blurry. He looked away from me as if disappointed, or couldn't handle seeing my tears.
"Fine, I'll stop, but know one thing, I—I love you more than he will ever be capable of. I could give you everything a vampire couldn't. I am everything that's right for you. A heart beat, alive, mortal, a real, just as how God intended it to be. When I first met you at the fellowship of the sun, I was ready to leave that damn church, but when I saw you, I knew you were the one for me. I also knew men will be after you everywhere you go, and I was happily ready to fight for you. But I—I… how do I fight someone who is not even suppose to exist?" His was gentle now, losing the forcefulness it held before. So he stayed at the church for me…
The room was silence, as all the vampires listened and waited. I turned toward Godric who hasn't moved an inch. His eyes were closed as if in pain. I stood on my tippy toes, wrapping my arms around him tightly, burying my face in his neck where I belong. "You know I'm yours right? Nothing will ever change that. I belong to you, and you only, no human, no vampire will ever change that. So have mercy and let him leave. No more blood, no more death. I just want it to be you and me, so do this for me." There was a moment of silence, before Godric pulled back from me, his hand reaching out to wipe my wet cheeks. I pressed my hand where his heart was, and I couldn't help but wonder would his heart beat as fast as mine at this moment if he was alive?
"Release him," spoke Godric, his words directed toward Isabel. "Of course, Godric," replied Isabel moving forward, I noticed at that moment she looked sad as if the human man's word, which was directed toward me, had pained her somehow. Toney's eyes were wide before he let out a long heartbroken sigh. "I didn't want to be released if it means leaving without you." He whispered sounding almost child like.
"Give up now, Toney, move on, find someone that makes you happy, and love you more than I will ever would." That was the cue for the long hair vampire to sprout into action. He sauntered toward the dead body, picking it up and flinging it over his shoulder like he was a sack of potatoes, before turning toward me. He must have seen the horror on my face because he winked at me as he made his way to walk out of the room.
As the female vampire passed me, she gave me a pat on the shoulder and a warm understanding smile, with still sad eyes. "Come on lover boy, out." She said grabbing Toney by the arm and dragging him with her. As they reached the door, Toney turned, "Anna, if you ever change your mind, know I'll be waiting." With that said, the door shut clicked. The room was quiet as if everything never happened.
By the way, check out some new banners. your reviews are most welcome and appreciated. thank you again:D
See you in next chapter:)