New chapter is up, I really hope you'll like it. As always, please come say hi and let me know what you think, all suggestions or criticisms are welcome!
"Kahlan." She heard Richard call gently.
So lost in her inner battle, she didn't realized that they weren't kissing anymore.
"Kahlan, my love, your lip is bleeding." Richard said.
She pressed her fingers to her mouth and saw the blood when she looked at it.
"Oh..." Was all she could say. She had tried to restrain her powers so hard that she had to bite her lip to do so.
Richard shook his head and said: "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have..."
"I shouldn't even be here, coming here, it was a mistake." He said as tears pooled in his eyes.
"Look what I've done to you, you are bleeding and shaking like a leaf. I can't... I can't love you like this anymore. I can't pretend that your power isn't between us when it is." He continued.
"I love you with all my heart and soul, but I can't hurt you anymore." He finished, giving her a kiss on the forehead and getting up.
"Finish your bath, I'm going to get dress and go back to my room." He said.
"Stay." She pleaded.
"I have to go. It's what's best for you." He said before walking to her bed to gather his clothes and shoes.
Coming back to her senses, Kahlan got out of the tub and quickly wrapped a towel around her. She walked towards Richard and sat on the bed next to him.
As he was busy lacing his boots, she put a hand on his tight in order to stop him.
"Don't..." He sharply said.
"Don't be mad at me please." She whispered, still shocked of having to hold onto her powers and what Richard had told her.
"Spirits Kahlan, I'm not mad at you." He almost yelled, getting up.
"I'm mad at everything. I'm mad because I love you so much that I have to leave you." He added on the same tone.
She looked down and whispered: "It's not your fault."
"Don't you see Kahlan? Don't you see it's my fault? Because every time we get close I can't keep my hands to myself, because the urge to feel you against me is harder to control that the anger of the Sword of Truth." He said.
"Your greatest fear is for me to lose my soul, I know how much it would hurt you if I was confessed to you. I don't want to hurt you and by staying here with you, it's all I'm doing." He explained.
He took his shirt and put it on and stood in front of her looking at her. She was still looking down and crying silently. He had to fight the urge to hold her in his arms. He had to be strong, he had to leave her.
"Maybe our paths will cross again some day." He said.
Kahlan was completely lost. Her heart was ordering her to throw herself at him and plead him to stay with her, but where would that lead them? Taking him as a mate, or for him to watch her take a mate? Her reason was telling her that he was giving them a way out. A way where she would be heart broken until the last day of her life but a way where Richard would have a chance to start over and have a life and where she could continue the line of Confessors.
She took a deep breath and straightened up. She looked at him in the eyes and said: "I'm sure I'll hear great stories about the Seeker."
A knock at the door interrupted them. Without a word, Richard went back to hiding in her closet.
Kahlan sighed and walked to the door.
"Who is this?" She asked, clearly annoyed.
"Pardon me, Mother Confessor, but Prince Travis is insisting on seeing you right away." She heard Sylvia said.
"Fine." She said with a sigh. The last thing she wanted was to talk to people, but being the Mother Confessor was her priority now.
"I'll be ready to see him in a few minutes." She said, grabbing her Confessor dress from the nearby chair. She quickly walked behind the folding screen and put it on. Then she walked back to the door and opened it.
"Prince Travis may come in now." She indicated to Sylvia, who nodded and bowed in return.
Walking back in the middle of her room, she waited, crossing her hands.
"Mother Confessor." Said the tall man when he entered her room. He walked in front of her and bended on one knee and looked down.
"Thank you for giving me this private audience." He said.
"You may get up Prince Travis." Kahlan told him.
When he rose from the floor, he looked at Kahlan right in the eyes. His deep blue eyes as piercing as hers. He was tall, young and handsome. It seemed that his blond hair was shinning despite the lack of sun in the room.
"It's good to see you again, Mother Confessor." He told her with a charming smile.
"We've known each other for a very long time, you can call me Kahlan." She told him.
"Very well, but only if you call me Tim in return." He said, smiling at her.
"Very well Tim, what's so urgent that you needed to talk to me?" Kahlan asked.
Bending on one knee once again, he said: "I, Prince Timothy Travis, am proposing myself to conceive the next line of Confessors."
Kahlan's jaw dropped.
"What is wrong with you?" Kahlan asked.
Getting up, Tim explained: "My father died Kahlan and I'll be crowned King soon, I want to make a radical change in the way my country used to cooperate with the Midlands."
"Cooperate? We are always at war with Primtica." Kahlan exclaimed.
"Exactly, that's why I came here, to offer peace. You know why I ran away from my father when I was just a boy, I'm not the tyrant he was." Tim replied.
"Do you remember what my touch can do to you? Are you aware that you will become my slave until the day I die?" Kahlan asked.
"Yes, we were almost raised together Kahlan, I know everything about your powers, but it's my duty, as King to protect my people and stop this war. The better way to unsure them that we are at peace with the Midlands is if you take me as a mate." He explained.
"And they'll lose their King." Kahlan said.
"No, they won't, you'll just order me to rule my country, I'll be their King and our daughter will be the Princess of Primtica." He said with a hopeful look.
Kahlan sighed and rubbed her temples, her headache was coming back.
Tim came close to her and said: "Come on Kahlan, I know you... You don't want to confess someone against its will, so choose me. I am willing to be confessed, I trust you, and I want to stop this awful war."
Kahlan closed her eyes for a moment, thinking about the situation. Tim had come up with a good plan, she was always reluctant at confessing people but he said himself that it was his duty. Plus, in the closet, Richard had probably heard everything and choosing Tim as a mate would separate their paths for good.
She opened her eyes and said: "Alright. I'll take you as a mate. For your people and for mine."
Tim smiled and said: "Thank you Kahlan, today is the day we start to save innocent's lives."
Kahlan nodded and indicated the door of her room to her soon to be mate. Tim nodded in return and she said: "Please, let the Council know about my decision."
Walking to the door, Tim asked: "Aren't you going to the afternoon session?"
"No, I'd rather rest for the moment, I'll be seeing them soon enough." She explained.
Kahlan opened the door and the two guards bowed in front of her.
"Please, escort Prince Travis to the room of his choice." She said.
"I'll be seeing you tonight then." Tim told her with a smile.
Kahlan nodded, she walked back in her room and closed the door. Leaning against it, she let herself fall on the floor. For a minute, she had forgotten that Richard was in the room, she quickly got up when she heard his footsteps approaching.
Clearing her throat, she found the strength to look at him in the eyes. They stood silent for a long moment, just looking in each other's eyes.
"I'm glad it's someone you know." Richard finally broke the silence.
Kahlan looked down, ashamed of herself.
"We met in Thandor, back when I was living with the Sisters of the Light." She explained.
There was another long silence and Richard said: "It's settled then, I should leave now."
Kahlan heart broke in two, she clenched her jaw to prevent tears from falling on her face.
"Yes, I send the two guards away so you can leave without being seen." She told him, trying to calm herself, she kept repeating in her mind to breath. She imagined herself begging at his feet to stay with her but she just stepped away from the door, knowing she had to let him go.
"No goodbyes." He said.
"No goodbyes." She repeated.
Richard wanted to kiss her goodbye and tell her that he would love her no matter what happened, but he couldn't. She had been right from the beginning, their love could never be, it was hopeless. He couldn't be selfish and ask her to forget about her duty just to be with him when she would have to fight against her own powers constantly, just because he wanted to be close to her.
He kissed her on the forehead, lightly brushing his lips against her skin. She closed her eyes, enjoying one last time the warmth of his body, inhaling his scent, trying to memorize it and hoping she would never forget what is was like to be close to him. She fought the need to wrap her arms around him but instead, she clenched her fists.
Without saying a word, Richard left the room and closed the door behind him. Kahlan stood still. She didn't want to open her eyes because if she did, he would be really gone. Tears slid past her closed eyes but she didn't bother wiping them away.
She jumped when she heard a knock on the door. Walking to the door, she prayed to the good Spirits that it was Richard coming back to her.
When she opened the door, she saw Sylvia. The maid noticed her tears but said nothing to the Mother Confessor.
"I beg your pardon, Mother Confessor, I am bothering you a lot today." The maid apologized.
"What is it?" Kahlan asked rather disappointed and angry.
"The healer that the Seeker requested for you just arrived and our scouts reported that the First Wizzard Zeddicus Zul' Zorrander accompanied by a Mord'Sith will be here soon." Sylvia said.
"I don't care. I don't want to see anyone. I just want to be left alone." Kahlan sharply said.
"As you order, Mother Confessor. Is there anything I can do for you?" The maid asked.
"Stop bothering me. I'll let you know if I need you." Kahlan said.
"Very well Mother Confessor." Sylvia said before bowing in front of Kahlan.
Kahlan nodded and closed the door of her room. She closed the curtains from the windows and lied down on her bed. Anguish from her betrayal was overwhelming her, the pain from her separation with Richard was killing her. Her migraine was stronger than ever, she guessed that it was pay back from her betrayal. She promised to herself that she would be weak for the day, but then it would be over. She would step up and embrace her destiny as the Mother Confessor. She would put her emotions aside and act like the leader she was destined to be. No more crying, no more pain, just her duty. The next time she will leave this room, Kahlan Amnell will be gone, the Mother Confessor will take her place.