The seminar had just begun. Kurt and Blaine had taken their seats together and were quietly listening. A few weeks ago, a gay kid in the area (yeah, another gay kid in Ohio, who would've thought?) had committed suicide, which was the reason for this seminar in the first place. First, they went on with the 'warning signs' which is where Kurt began to get uncomfortable. He swallowed loudly and Blaine turned to him

"Hey…are you okay?" he asked sincerely, Kurt managed a tight smile and nodded

"Yeah, fine."

But it only progressed from there. As they were talking about the after effects, what it would do to their family and friends, Kurt couldn't take it anymore. He stood and ran out of the room, unaware of where his feet were taking him until he arrived at his dorm room. He shut it and locked it, promptly sliding down and sitting with his knees pulled tight to his chest, hoping to slow his breathing. Seconds later, there was a loud knock at his door

"Kurt!" Blaine called through the wood "Kurt, open up!" Kurt choked a bit

"I can't." he replied

"Please, Kurt, you're upset, let me in!" he insisted, Kurt shook his head, Blaine didn't understand, he couldn't. Kurt didn't know how to tell him in a way that would make him understand, he didn't know how to show him how he felt. Kurt stood slowly and walked solemnly over to his dresser, rifled through the doors and picked out the envelope. He made his way back over and sat down again, pressing his back to the door and taking a deep breath before sliding the envelope under the door.

Blaine looked down as something white was being slid under the door. He bent down to pick it up and sat down, back against the door. He opened the envelope and pulled out the piece of paper with Kurt's neat handwriting scrawled across it. He read the note with increasingly shaking fingers and blurry vision. When it finally, finally came to an end he rubbed a hand over his face and sealed the note back up, sliding it into his pocket.

"Kurt." He rasped "let me in." a low sob sounded through the wood and Blaine was desperate. "Kurt, please, let me in, please!" Blaine felt an ache in his throat and tried to swallow his tears.

"Tell me what you need, let me help you, Kurt, PLEASE, let me in!" A sob escaped him and he leaned his forehead against the door. He heard the soft click of the lock being undone, he slowly reached down and turned the knob, easing the door open. Once he was inside, he barely looked at Kurt before gathering the boy up in his arms and bringing him over to sit on the bed. Usually, Blaine would be strong as Kurt cried, he would tell him it would be alright and not to worry about it, but this just wasn't one of those times. He cried steadily with Kurt, ran his fingers through his hair and kissed his forehead

"Don't leave me," he begged "don't you dare leave me." Kurt gripped the front of Blaine's blazer because there was just so much desperation in his voice…Kurt didn't think anyone cared about him that much.

"N-nobody c-cares, Blaine." Blaine's arms instinctively tightened around him

"You're mine," he said roughly "and nobody is allowed to take you away from me, including yourself." Kurt's heart swelled at the tone of possessiveness in his friend's voice. But that was the odd part, Blaine was his friend, he shouldn't be possessive of Kurt, Kurt wasn't his. Kurt looked up at him with wide, wet eyes and Blaine seemed to be registering what he'd just said.

"Kurt…" he looked honestly…afraid. "I wasn't thinking, I'm sorry…"

"Usually," Kurt sniffed "people are most sincere when they're not thinking." Blaine brought a hand up to wipe his eyes and smiled softly.

"I love you." He said "I really do, and I couldn't handle it if I lost you."

"I…I love you, too." He said softly "I never tried." He admitted "I think…I mean, I never really wanted to die." He spoke in nearly a whisper "maybe…if I got close enough someone would care enough to stop me." He shrugged. Blaine rubbed at his eyes and leaned forward once more to kiss Kurt's forehead

"You're breaking my heart." He informed the boy, raking a hand through his soft chestnut hair.

"Sorry." Blaine smiled and leaned his forehead against Kurt's, the tips of their noses touched

"Just promise me something?"

"depends."

"Please don't take yourself away from me, and remember that you're loved, and that no matter what happens or how bad you feel, that I'm always here for you. You're never alone."

"That's kind of a tall order." Kurt said, but he couldn't help but smile

"I know. But do you think you can manage?" Blaine asked, blinking slowly

"Yeah…I think I can."

(AUTHORS NOTE: Okay, so…this was really hard to write (more for personal reasons) I hope you liked it either way)

(ps. Next chapter, something based on Katy Perry's "The one that got away" or a genderbent one? Leave a review telling me which you'd prefer!)