A/N: Thought about playing with Killua's head once in a while. Interesting xD

Yu-Gi-Oh! fans will be familiar with the title of the chapter. Muhahaha.

DISCLAIMER: Yoshihiro Togashi (c) Hunter x Hunter

OWC: 4,205

Chapter 08

Change of Heart

[Killua's Pov]

"YOU ALL FAIL!"

The resounding shriek of the examiner effectively silenced every single examinee. The rustling and hustling from earlier skidded into a halt, a cold, indescribable pause. No one was actually expecting this; not even me, the one who was supposed to know or at least have a clue to everything that will happen, ten steps ahead. Not that I actually cared too much if I failed, because the Hunter Exam for me, was just another 'kill the time and boredom' game, anyway. But I did realize the others would mourn for this. They had their own – no matter how pathetic – reasons.

And from where I stood in my station, I could see Kurapika's look turn into one of disbelief, Akane's face scream no way in hell as she mouthed it, Gon turn down to the floor in utter sadness, and Leorio's eyes almost fall out of its sockets.

Not one of them was pleased, and I could say that again, I knew.

And then suddenly, Menchi, as if nothing was wrong in the world, suddenly went back into some sort of "normal mode," Buhara looking at her curiously, cautiously. Lots of things transpired as some of the applicants still had their jaws wide open. I didn't pay much attention, but I noticed her move around giddily as if trying to ignore the fact that she had failed every single examinee in this year. She continued to try her best to entertain the still baffled examinees with a certain weed she was bragging about.

The answer was no, if you were asking. It was not entertaining.

And then, after she was done explaining with much gusto, after everything was finished, what she had said on a final note dropped like a bomb. "Okay, that's it for this year. Out. Failures."

I washed my hands in the faucet and promptly took my skateboard, letting it drop to the ground below me. I was more than ready to go. With a sigh, I pushed the ground with little effort, making me move. I didn't think the exam was THIS pathetic.

I was smart enough to follow her orders of course, accordingly and with more enthusiasm than the others with me. I lead the pack and they followed after me, walking one-by-one, with not much excitement in their step.

I looked around and sighed. Damn, they've already failed us and all. Are they actually planning to send us back the way we came from? They could have at least shown a shortcut out of the damn marsh from hell.

Another sigh escaped my lips for a reason I could not explain. Or at least a bar of chocolate.

"Killua!" Akane called, and I turned around only to see that she had already wrapped her arms around my neck, hugging me from behind something like a cat would have done. Her voice had a tone of a whine in it. She hung limply on my neck, and I had to stop the skateboard to prevent dragging her with me.

"What is it?" I asked her with an uncaring voice, trying to show her my disinterest.

"This is unfair," she murmured into my collar, and I could tell that she was trying to hold back her tears. I edged a little and she took off her hands from my neck, proceeding to walk by my side instead. She sighed. "This is just plain stupid. I did not run miles just to be failed by raw fish."

I shrugged. As pointless as it seemed to be in the situation, somehow I saw that she still had a point on that. I slid my hands in my pockets. I still had not spoken a word of answer to her, and I knew she would soon come looking for an answer.

And look she did.

She looked down to the ground and drunk a mouthful of air. She might as well sigh it out of her. "How cold of you," she told me, and she was glaring at the ground. Obviously the knife-sharp glare should have been directed to me, but Akane was being an angel again. "And I thought you'd care to comfort Gon."

"What's his problem isn't mine to mess with, if it isn't his to share," I said simply, my voice remaining monotone, but I could say I would falter soon enough. There was some kind of thing that happened to me whenever anything concerned Gon. It wasn't overprotectiveness either, but I could not put a word to it. I was not a writer.

"Heartless!" Akane shouted, and I was caught off guard with her sudden statement. I looked at her with raised eyebrows, trying to get a reason for her sudden accusation. "Killua, what is wrong with you? And I thought you've changed!" Her hands were fists by her sides, ready to punch me if her control wavered, and, glare finally pointed at me, there were three seconds of thick tension before she throttled off in the opposite direction.

Her voice echoed in my head, like it was in a chamber, bouncing around in the dark walls, eating me up, before they finally crumbled against me.

Changed.

I thought... you've changed.

For what?

I thought…

I thought…

I couldn't take it any longer, either. I took a deep, longing, solemn breath, trying to calm my raging thoughts, and her words that were bouncing off the caverns of my bloody mind. I took another one, feeling the cool air from the marsh invade my lungs, clearing me, somehow.

"Akane…?"

"What. Do. You. Want?" she stressed each and every word, trying to shove in my face that she was not pleased with the words that had flown out of my mouth. She was leaning on a tree, and the shadow from the leaves hid her facial expression from my sight. Even her bangs helped her conceal whatever was in those eyes, so I couldn't guess or anything.

I bit my bottom lip for half a second, trying to calm down my nerves. I had that urge to do something to her, probably get her out of the anger by going one-on-one on her. But I knew better. "I-I'm sorry," I said, hopeless as I am on the prospect of apologizing. "I guess that was insensitive of me. Really stupid. I didn't mean to, I just—"

"Killua," she interrupted my awkward sayings. "I know that's how you are, so you don't need to apologize. You can just do better with it," she said, pointing to where Gon was. There was a certain hardness in her voice, but I could feel the sympathy and care in it. "Now go."

I smiled at her, that first friendly, whole-hearted smile I believed I've ever given. I looked at her and in her, I saw that she was the sibling I've at long last wished for, that non-assassin love that was shared in a family, but not necessarily romantically.

And then, noting the glow in her eyes, I ran off to Gon.

"Gon!"

He didn't even bother to look up. He was either completely absorbed in his thoughts, or he was ignoring me on conscious purpose. I poked him in his temple gently with my index finger, trying to nudge him and call his attention.

"Gon."

"'There's always next year,'" He said with a bitter tone prevalent in his voice. His adam's apple bobbed once, twice, and I knew he was swallowing down screams of either anger or sadness that ate him away. Gon was good at keeping calm that time. "Killua, that's what they always say! But I can't wait any longer! I want to find my father!"

And from where I sat, just beside him, I could sense the determination mingling in with the sadness that burned within him. It was heartbreaking, in a way. I looked at him with pitiful eyes and I wondered, what could a killer like me do for an innocent child like him? What could I do?

"Goodness befalls only on the good," Kurapika said, breaking the awkward, icy silence between the two of us. He wanted to comfort Gon too, in his own little smarty-pants way like he always does. I looked at him in amazement. And I thought he'd be too busy moping as well.

And then, an interruption that I was long looking for suddenly came along. And boy, was it a useful interruption. "Killua! Gon! Kurapika!" Akane called, running like the wind right beside Leorio.

When Leorio caught his breath, he said, "Look up!"

And I turned my head up only to have my keen eyes catch the blimp that flew overhead. And from where I was, what stood out from the pack of clouds and sky and huge blimp was the very, very prominent symbol imprinted on the blimp's massive air-pocket.

The Hunter insignia.

I must have spaced out a moment too long to forget about it. Kurapika, with his quick reflexes, covered Akane's mouth when he realized a giant dust cloud was to come. We both knew—he just acted faster, okay?—that it would have been even harder if Akane got an attack at that time. How could I forget? Akane's eyes widened with the sudden gesture, but they returned to normal when the realization hit her in the face. Kurapika took off his hand when the dust finally settled, and Akane coughed slightly.

And, just like magic, out of the dust, an old man was revealed.

"Chairman Netero!" Menchi shouted. In her voice, there was some kind of…surprise? "How do you do, sir?"

Netero? I wondered, staring at the gray-bearded man. I let go of Gon's shoulder and stood up to see the scene clearer from my perspective, so that I wouldn't be hidden by the trees and the other applicants. I thought about it again. Wait... The old geezer's the head of the Hunter Association?

The old man did not even blink. "I heard you failed this year's batch," he said to her. I winced, slightly, in my head. Did he care the least for his examiner or what? Straight to the point, bull's-eye. Menchi blinked, trying her hardest to look like an innocent kid.

I chuckled darkly. She was horrible at it, and she was failing it.

"They did not successfully complete the test, Chairman," Menchi said, after swallowing silently. It almost sounded defensive—Wait, what? Now she was trying to defend herself for what she did? What was wrong with her?

It was so easy to miss, but I since kept a good and weary eye at him, I caught his slight reaction to her statement—Netero's left eyebrow twitched. "And what have you asked them?"

"Sushi, sir," Menchi said, sounding really hoarse and obviously forcing on the formalities. She obviously didn't like sitting on the hot seat—who liked to?

"Do they have any initial idea about it?"

Menchi swallowed her saliva. She ran her tongue between her lips, before biting at her lower lip quickly. Obviously she did not like having conversations like this one with the chairman.

But of course, she would remain firm with her decision. She was the examiner after all.

Girls, I thought.

"Chairman, I have revealed the most important fact about it that it is made of fish, and the other ingredients—if not distinct—have been laid out to them," she told the man. "But there was one examinee—that bald ninja over there—that knew how this was prepared. He revealed the ingredients to the other examinees, sir. It does not matter whether it was intentional or by accident it had slipped out of his large mouth," she explained. She stressed the word large as she looked over to Hanzo. "That was the initial cause of the overall failure."

Meh, I thought. My hands made their way to get woven behind my head like a net. Admit it, you blew your fuse that's why we all failed.

The man nodded, stroking his long beard in quiet thought. Finally, after seconds of tension that embraced all the examinees, and even Menchi, Chairman Netero gave the final decision that held all hope on a tiny horsetail string.

"Give them another chance," he said. Silence answered him, begged him to continue, the earnest wish of the examinees, and he clarified, "Given you do the exam too."

A gleam lit up in Gon's once-darkened face.

"Pardon, sir?" Menchi asked, a little confused at what the Chairman had just told her.

"Redo the test," the Chairman said again. "But this time, you would have to do it too, so that it would be believable."

Menchi paused, and then finally nodded. "Agreed." She looked around, and then finally went on with what she needed. "Chairman, please bring us to that mountain." She pointed at a faraway mountain.

And so he did.

The feat was no less than amazing for the other examinees—to me, it was but an easy stunt. Examiner had jumped down the cliff, held on to the white, net-like string that went from one side to the other, grabbed two of the eggs in the bunch, waited for the wind, and then let go and went up with it. She had grinned mischievously at the examinees, holding the egg cautiously like itw as made out of gold.

"All you have to do is retrieve the Spider Eagle eggs," Menchi said, juggling the two said eggs she had grabbed earlier. "Pretty easy, no? Easier than Sushi, of course; you don't even need to use your head," she hissed under her breath.

One-by-one, starting with Gon, the examinees jumped down the cliff with excitement. Gon was followed by Akane, then Kurapika, then Leorio, me, then Tompa. There was tension in the air as the flat up at the top the mountain started to run out of people. Some was carried by the strong draft; some, only their terrified screams.

I swung through the strong ropes of web, finding the bunch with the most eggs—I'm picky and I'm greedy, after all—and then waited for the draft. When it came, I let go, and as easily as a dried leaf I was carried into the air, then I grabbed Gon's hand when I saw him. I landed feet-first in the ground, sharing ear-to-ear grins with Gon.

"Wasn't that easy?" I asked Gon, and he only nodded.

He stared at the egg. "I wonder what this tastes like. I mean, this is a delicacy, right?"

I just nodded to him and looked around the surroundings wearily. Where is Akane? And when I turned once more, she really wasn't there, with not a single sign of her, her long blonde hair nor her maroon sweatshirt.

Quickly as that, I heard a bloodcurdling scream.

And when I looked down, she was there, furiously fighting for her life. Her right hand clung on to the white silken threads like there was no tomorrow, while her left hand—along with her entire body—was being dragged down by a really heavy weight.

Who else could it be but Tompa.

"Let go of him!" I told her, blood pulsating in my veins. Oh, how annoyed was I of him; how easily also could I rip out his intestines, then let it fall like a rope down the cliff to save Akane.

And then, the anger turned, suddenly, to Akane. What was she doing, stupidly holding on to him? Did she actually want to save that guy's pathetic life? Did her compassion actually reach levels that far and that nonsensical?

"He won't let go," Akane shouted in desperation. She clasped her left hand open to prove her point, and I saw that it was only him clinging on, after all. The sudden intake of air with her speech made her eyes widen in shock. She coughed. I started to get worried."Air–too–thick!" She managed to blurt out, right before she started to wheeze angrily, coughing fits shaking her whole body. It must've been something from the bottom.

The draft that's supposed to carry them up! I suddenly remembered.

"Akane let go of the string! The draft is going to carry you up!" I screamed, not caring anymore if the other applicants still down the cliff heard me or not. Who would care about two to five more people in the exam, if Akane herself couldn't get through with it?

What the hell are you saying.

I saw Akane try to, but then the draft died down and Tompa started pulling like a madman on her already-pale wrist, and she was on the brink of falling into unconsciousness. I was panicking, panicking on what I should do in that moment, and there was a bad urge in my head that told me to kill Tompa in that instant. I saw Akane battle her impulse to suddenly lose consciousness—gal had the sense to stay awake in a situation like that. (And if she had let go, of the string and her consciousness, she wouldn't be able to pass the exam dead either, hmm?) But her breathing had become laboured, and she was coughing like hell. Tompa wasn't much of a help, either.

She's going to die.

My assassin self suddenly woke up, and it was teasing me.

She's going to fall into the current.

'Shut. Up.' My hands were clenched at my sides and I felt my blood boiling at the sound of my assassin self's voice. How I hated him!

Her bones will be crushed with speed only beatable by you.

She's going to fade away…

'SHUT UP!'

Oh yes she will… but you're used to death, aren't you? Every single day of your past life, you've bathed in the smell of blood and it had always made you lucid. Wasn't death your high? Wasn't the idea of letting someone let go of life and be in a place where they belong… wasn't that so amazing? Why don't you dwell in that glory?

You are the bringer of death, after all…

"YOU ARE NOT DYING ON ME, AKANE!"

I jumped off the cliff, managing myself down the vines of white filaments. I was still ten feet too far from Akane when suddenly Tompa jumped—fat and all jingling up and down with his sudden motion—after letting go of Akane's wrist. He was carried up by the draft that lasted a mere few seconds. But before he was carried up—damn bastard hadn't had enough torture time just holding on to her for so long—he made the girl let go of the thread with a swift tap to her hand, and she fell into her mind's own oblivion, headed toward the river's speeding current.

"Oh shit!"

And it came too fast, everything came too fast like it was on fast forward:

The wind blew back my hair, biting at the surface of my eyes. My clothes rustled, fabric hitting my skin, like whips—a familiar sensation. And then, suddenly, like a jet plane, a nose dive straight to target, and the next moment, all I could ask myself was…"And how did I get in this situation again?"

I hung on the same thread of spider-eagle silk that Akane had hung onto a few seconds back with my right hand, and on my left I grasped her waist. I did not have any clue how I got there with such a velocity. I was breathing hard and I felt like I had run a sprint. Thrice.

[What amazed me was that she was two or three inches taller than me, and she's much older than me ('This obaa-san…' my mind joked, even if it wasn't time for jokes), but she felt as light as a feather in my arms.]

I raised her up to the point that I wasn't carrying her by the waist, but she draped on my back like a sack of potatoes. I breathed deep breaths, waiting for the draft, and then, it came and I jumped lightly, up, up, til I reached the top.

I put her on the ground nearest, and Gon rushed over to her. He was sputtering out some questions but they faded away like the air pressure below when he saw Akane. I just answered him with blank nods and hoped that he got the point that I wasn't really paying attention. He tended to Akane, tried to wake her up.

I took an egg from my bundle, cradled it in my hands, and told her, while she was still unconscious: "This is your egg now." I made her hand run through it and I walked over to dump it in the pot where everybody was boiling their eggs. I waited a few minutes, then I put my hand in the water (I had gotten used to heated substances) and took it out. As I walked back to the still-unconscious Akane, I shook it, cooled it for a few seconds, but later put it on the skin on face.

She sputtered to life, blue eyes searching.

"So what really happened?"

She'd been asking me the same question for twenty times or more, over and over again. She seemed to have entirely forgotten what happened—or probably, she was unable to make a memory from being unconscious to now. She helplessly nibbled on her spider-eagle egg—still believing that the egg was hers and not mine, but I did not and will not ever tell her that it wasn't—waiting for me to tell her something helpful.

It was either that, or she was just playing with me, and I was just idiosyncrasiously (if such degree of idiosyncrasy exists) playing along.

What the hell did she expect me to tell her?

"Akane," I sighed. I had lost count how many times I've answered her with that beginning. "You were there, Tompa was there, and you lost consciousness."

"So then what really happened?" she asked again, but seeing my paper blank reaction, she decided to—finally, after so many trials to getting her to—clarify. "Why am I here and passed the test if I was in the blasted river?"

I grinned. She got it at last! A dark smirk started to crawl uncontrollably through my face. "Let's just say that an amazing, white-haired superman came to save the purrty princess." I managed to make a comical face for the comical word purrty for pretty. She giggled slightly—but I couldn't be sure if it was because of my face or because of the word I used in the sentence.

"Right," she said, sweeping her hair off her shoulder. She took a deep breath, the smile finally making its way to her face comfortably. "Tell superman the princess says thanks."

"Superman says it's no prob, it's his job after all, even if he doesn't get paid," I said. She grinned at me and I only winked back, then I went out of the room to get a breath of fresh air. Kurapika entered the room slightly after I left.

And as I walked out, headed to no exact place, I pondered at how ironic life really was. My first job was taking lives, now the job is saving lives.

I chuckled at the dark thought.