A/N: Thank you so much for the added alerts, my dear readers :) You make my heart swell :)
And to the new reviewers (7 of you) , muchas gracias! I won't be able to update for 3-4 days though, boohoo! I will be busy having my duty in an Operating Room, so blaah. Enjoy! Do review more!
As usual, I don't own Hunger Games :)
CHAPTER 4
"Good morning baby! How is my little girl doing?". I hear Peeta talking to my tummy and caressing my 6-month old baby bump. He does this every morning ever since we found out we were expecting.
"Little girl? How can you be so sure about the baby being a girl, Peeta?", I smile as I join my hands in his, stroking my baby bump.
"I just know she is", he chuckles.
"I still feel it's a boy", I say. He shakes his head. "Guess we'll know who's right later when we go to the doctors", he says.
"Fine", I respond. "But what about your big girl? She's feeling a little bit jealous of all the attention your little girl has from you", I continue as I make a small pout.
He shifts positions and he's head is now level with mine. He laughs and caresses my cheeks. Then he starts lowering his head into mine until our lips touch. It is sweet, slow at first. We cherish the kiss as if it is our first. He laughs and deepens the kiss, making me open my mouth and let him in. Our tongues dance in perfect tune, little moans escape here and there until we pull away to breathe.
"Now, who's not getting attention again?", he smirks as he plants one kiss to my forehead.
I am about to pull him in again when my stomach made a gurgling noise. Oh great! Why do I have to feel hunger at this moment? I unconsciously made a sad face.
I can hear Peeta laughing beside me. "Something tells me you have to be fed big girl, and I mean real food.", he winks at me as he helps me up and guides me through the kitchen.
We obviously have cheese buns and a couple of other breads for breakfast, with chocolate milk and butters and other stuffs. We eat while talking about some things, like what color he should paint the nursery, what kind of carpet should we get for the baby's room. We laugh about small things. We finish eating and I start picking up the dishes when he stops me. "Let me do this, love. No need to get worked up on unnecessary things" he says as he kisses the top of my hair. I don't argue, so I let him take care of the dishes and sit by the counter and just stare at the beautiful green grass outside.
My pregnancy has been running pretty good albeit the nausea, vomiting, lightheadedness and dizziness the first few months. Ofcourse, my back aches from the pounds I've put on for this little joy but Peeta makes sure to get rid of it by working his oh so talented hands on it. I stroke my belly and smile. The thought of building a family with Peeta is just so blissful. Somehow, I thank the odds for letting me have Prim to volunteer for and Peeta's name drawn or else we could've never happened. This new Panem couldn't have happened. My little miracle couldn't have happened.
Moments later and I can feel Peeta behind me, his hands on my waist, "Now where were we?", he says seductively right beside my left ear. His warm breath on my skin sends shivers down my spine. He starts nibbling on my ear while running his hands up and down my arms. I turn around, facing him and have his lips on mine. Tongues dance in rhythm again and I feel his hands leave my arms and find it back on my buttocks. He kneads it like dough. "Oh Peeta.. You have such talented hands", I chuckle.
I can feel him lift me up so that I am now sitting on the counter. God how strong his arms are! My hands grab his arms and start toying with it. His lips left mine and found my neck. "Ohh.. Peeta", I moan. He leaves hot trails in every patch of skin his lips touch. I start playing on the hemlines of his pajamas as he begins to unbutton the back side of my maternity dress. I tug him shirt free as I plant kisses on the realms of his collarbone. "Katniss..", he moans. He is about to yank me off my dress when our door opened welcoming a seemingly sober Haymitch inside.
"Jesus! You two!", he exclaimed and turn his gaze to me. "You look like a freaking hippopotamus and all you can think of is sex! Can't you at least wait for the little Mellark to pop it's tiny body out before you start doing what you do best?", he sermons like a father.
I wouldn't have been bothered if it is just Haymitch walking in on us. He knows what happens inside our closed doors, heck he even hears it from across his house. Who makes my face turn beet red is the petite lady with pink hair, pink overalls and pink lips with him. Effie.
"Effie?", I ask as Peeta kneels down, retrieves his shirt and put it back on, he then buttons what he unbuttoned from my back.
"Katniss sweetie! You look absolutely glowing! Pregnancy suits you well!", Effie beamed as she kisses me on my cheek.
"So I've heard", I chuckle. She wasn't the only one who dropped me that comment. People from the streets say I look absolutely fitted for pregnancy.
She smiles as she turns to Peeta. "Oh Peeta, you've never looked better either!", she then kisses Peeta on his cheek and shoved his hair like she used to do back in the games. "My little tributes are all grown up", she says as she holds back tears.
I immediately look towards Peeta. Tributes. We never talked about the games in a long time now, so I am afraid whether or not it will cause some stirring inside him. It's been 8 years but we still are the remains of the rebellion, Peeta still has flashbacks and I still have my nightmares about the ones who died during those three years. He easily weans me away from my own evil nightmares at night; he hugs me close till I fall asleep again. He still clutches the back of a chair from time to time, and when he does, I try my best to bring him back, reorient him to our life right now, I even sing to him the Valley song if all else fail. But when my presence isn't enough, he tells me to lock myself out in our room and agonizingly wait.
I see his blue eyes leaving and see black taking over as he clutches the side of the counter with much force. I can see Effie's widened eyes in my peripheral vision. "I'm sorry", she gasps as she stands still, glued to the floor. Haymitch is about to take Effie and me away but I resist, Peeta needs me. Haymitch sees my point and let go of my wrist as he yanks Effie to the living room.
"Peeta, sweetie", I say as I climb down the counter carefully. "It's me, Katniss.", I continue as I hug him from behind. "We're back in District 12, the war is over. We are now married, love", I hug him tighter. His grip is still hardening against the counter top. "Come on, Peeta. Come back to me", he's still frigid. Then I put my hand on his, gaze at his face and begin singing the Valley Song, his song. I am relieved by the softening of his hands against the counter, but I can still see the black in his eyes so I know he's still not back.
I can feel tears building up my eyes as I know that I'm on the verge of failureon bringing him back. I'm expecting for him to tell me to lock myself in our room. And suddenly I blurt, "Come back please, Peeta. I need you - we need you". I took his hand and put it on my belly as tears fell from my eyes. "Your little girl needs you". And then and there, I feel a strong kick from where I put Peeta's hand. He jerks his away as he evidently felt it too, I look at his eyes and I can see it slowly turning blue. I take his hand again, albeit his resistance, and put it on the same spot. "She needs her daddy, Peeta. Come back", and then the baby kicks hard and I think my ribs are fractured. He tries to yank his hand away but I firmly hold it in place. The baby rises up to the event and starts kicking frantically. I never felt her kicking this way. "Peeta, come back to your girls", I plead and look back to his eyes, they are now the color of gorgeous blue. Before I know it, I feel his arms surrounding me and hugging me oh so gently.
"Katniss.. I'm sorry", he apologizes as he run his hands through my hair.
"No, Peeta. Don't be sorry. Never be sorry for those", I say and I press my head harder to his chest. "We're glad you're back", I lift my head up and smile at him.
He smiles back and put his hand back to my belly. "Hey baby girl, Daddy's been out of his mind. I'm sorry", he bends down and kisses it. It kicks again.
"She loves you, Peeta", I say. "She's going to be a Daddy's girl".
"Don't be silly", he replies. "She loves the both of us. Right sweetie?", and it kicks again.
We shared a hearty laughter together. Somebody cleared his throat and I notice Haymitch standing on the doorway towards the living room. I take it as an invitation to see Effie, so I grab Peeta's wrists and lead him towards the couch where Effie is sitting.
Poor Effie. She feels oh so guilty, the strain of the situation is pretty much evident on her face. I sit down next to her, Peeta by my side, and put my hand on her back. "Effie… It's not your fault".
She lifts her head and meets my eyes. "How can I be so careless?", she sighs. "I should've known better. I'm truly sorry", she clutches my remaining hand with both of hers.
"No, Effie", Peeta interrupts. "I think it's high time we start digging up our past", I look at him, puzzled. "We have to, sweetie", he says to me. "Someday, this little bugger will grow up, and whether we like it or not, she will know about the games, of how the old Panem works, of the rebellion, of me and you. I think it will be for the best if she'll know it directly from us, Katniss, not from the mouths of various people surrounding her. It has to be us to tell her, make her understand. And we couldn't do that if we keep hiding from our fears of what we were sweetie. Let's do this for her", he plants a kiss on my forehead and strokes my belly with his hand. And then the baby kicks again.
"Oh so you agree with your father, don't you little one?", I mumble as I put one hand over Peeta's on my belly. I never thought of this matter before, of how the child needs to know how her mom and dad played roles in the birth of the world she's thriving in, of how people died because of her mom, of how her mom and dad are scarred for the rest of their lives. I always thought her life will be normal, that I can protect her from everything potentially destructive to her. I sigh as I realize that I couldn't. She'll be making her own way towards the world, and it will be a miracle for her to not get attention. She is, after all, the daughter of the star-crossed lovers of District 12, the daughter of the Mockingjay. Normalcy didn't exist even before she was conceived. I took a deep breath and look at Peeta again. He squeezes my hand and pulls me in for a hug.
"If there's something we are entitled to say to you right now, Effie, it will be Thank You", he says to Effie. "Thank you for making us realize that we eventually need to revisit what we don't like to remember. We owe it to you", he says as he flashes a half smile to Effie.
Effie just smiles back and eases in to a slouch. She never slouches, at least not in front of us. Elegance and etiquette are Effie's line of life. She thrives in it. So it shocks me to see what she just did. She laughs a bit, "Oh come on Katniss, a little slouch can't kill me", she says in her capitol voice.
We all laugh. "So, what brings you here Effie?", I ask.
I heard choking in the room, and I turn to its direction and figure out it comes from Haymitch. I cross my brows and turn back to Effie.
"Oh.. I uh.. uhm..", she blushes. Effie never blushes, what's going on? "I'm moving here in District 12", she explains faster than she normally does. "With Haymitch…", she continues as her face becomes redder than I've ever seen it.
What? How? Effie and Haymitch? My mind says. I've never seen or thought of them being together together. They are the total opposites on everything, heck they don't even get along during our games. My mouth hangs open and I switch my gaze from her to the unusually sober man from across the room.
"Oh close your mouth, Katniss.", budges Haymitch. "You could've said something nice like Congratulations maybe?", he raises one eyebrow up.
I still couldn't grasp the whole situation.
"Congrats Haymitch and Effie", Peeta says. "Why didn't you bother telling us Haymitch?", he continues.
"Oh you kids are always busy", Haymitch puts a dirty emphasis on the last word. I scowl at him and he chuckles.
"I'm formally moving in next week kids", I hear Effie saying. "But I'll still be going to and fro the Capitol. I still have to work for a living you know?", she laughs at herself.
"Speaking of the Capitol", Haymitch's face became serious. "You have to keep tabs on the news now, Sweetheart. You'll like what you'll hear", he says as he turns on the television. "After all, this could help you get to know the new Panem", he continues.
"Say Peeta, care to accompany me to the Hob? I uh, need to get something", Haymitch asks Peeta.
"Sure, Haymitch", he agrees. He kisses me lightly. "See you later, sweetie". And the both of them leave the door silently.
I'm surprised the television still works. I think it never got turned on the moment I moved in with Peeta. We don't watch television, Peeta and I. It was an unspoken agreement to not engage ourselves with the news and stuffs from the Capitol. Peeta and I felt that we had enough of it, that we want to be left alone, away from the Capitol.
The air grows cold without Peeta by my side so I march up the stairs, grab newly folded blankets, make my way back, give one to Effie and suited myself back to the couch. And there in the little television box, I see him. My bestfriend. Gale. He has grown so much, he became even buffer, but his eyes hold dark circles around it. I inhaled sharply. I haven't talked to Gale after what happened with Prim. I know deep in my heart it wasn't his fault; that he wasn't the one who pulled the trigger to light up the bombs, but still, the sight of him makes my stomach churn with pain. No matter what happens, his face will always take me back to the moment I saw my sister burn.
"Katniss…", I hear Effie on the side. She knows the strain of my relationship with Gale.
I just smile back at her. Then I hear him speak.
"I'm Gale Hawthorne and I'm running for a senatorial position for the recently revamped government of Panem".
"Gale Hawthorne? Weren't you the Mockingjay's cousin?", a reporter asks.
"Yes…", Gale answers quickly but I see the glint of pain in his eyes.
"How is the Mockingjay now Mr. Hawthorne?"
"I believe it is not in my prerogative to reveal the present condition of my cousin, guys. I would be invading her privacy", he laughs to them. "But I assure you she's doing better now, after all, she's with the boy with the bread", he continues.
"Ooohs" and "aaahs" are heard in the mob.
"As much as I'd like to stay and chat, I have to get going. I'll be having a meeting with the President. Don't forget Gale Hawthorne for Senator".
I turned the television off.
"Effie?", I call to her.
Effie probably knows what I'm about to ask her so she goes straight and answers me, "Gale is running for Senator, Katniss."
I arch my brows. I don't have any idea of what a Senator is anyway. "Tell me more about the new government, Effie. As much as you know", I prepare myself for quite a long explanation, so I make myself comfortable and face Effie again.
"Well, I know politics isn't your cup of tea, sweetie. Let's just say Senators are kind of the President's chums in running the country. Their duties are mainly to write, propose and help to pass laws. The people sitting on the positions just revamped the whole government years ago Katniss. We didn't have Senators back then because Snow wanted the power to himself, a totalitarian form of government I believe. They had it changed to a democratic form of government now, Katniss. The lawmakers apparently took this type of government from our ancestors. They read it in books and studied it for a long time before formally proposing it to be Panem's new kind of government. But they made changes with how it is from the past, so it's not exactly the same as the books.", she pauses, taking a breath.
"Democracy - meaning the power of electing the officers for positions lies in the hands of people. Elections are held to let people choose who they want seated in the government. Apparently, Gale is running for one. In addition to Senators, each District gets to elect 3 representatives to represent itself to the Capitol, to help them voice out their respective problems, voices, shortages and etcetera. Panem now caters to the concern of the whole country Katniss, not just the Capitol's", she smiles.
Effie left minutes after her brief lecture about the whole government thing. She says she needed to unpack the small stuffs she brought from the Capitol into her new home. I let her go cause I know I needed time to think.
New government. I like the sound of what was that again? Oh.. Democracy? It seems fair, legit to the whole of Panem. I smile. And then the image of Snow comes into my mind, I flinch at his snake-like eyes. He, who enjoyed the taste of power too much to the point of killing people just to maintain his supremacy. He who took away my father, my childhood, my innocence, Peeta. And then there is Coin, who made me play in her games in order for her to snatch the power from Snow. She, who took away children's lives, including my sister, in order for her to have the final win. I stop my own thoughts from running. I inhaled sharply again.
I shouldn't be thinking of this. Snow and Coin are now dead, they are all but decaying matters of the earth. This is a new life now, where people will no longer fear on sending their children to the games, of people getting opportunities to improve their lives. New Panem.
I reach out to my belly. "You are going to live well my little warrior", I say to the little creature growing inside of me. The baby kicks back and I laugh.
Then I hear the door open. Judging by the loud thumping of footsteps, I know that it's the love of my life making his way to me.
"Heyyy", he greeted as he scoops me from the couch and kisses me on the lips. "How have you been? I missed you!", he says sincerely.
"Put me down or you'll strain yourself, love", I say lovingly. And he did sit me down on the couch. "I've been good, thank you. Learned about the new Panem, new government and.. uhm.. Gale", I carefully blurt the last word out.
He flinches on the sound, but he still smiles. "Hmm? I did too. Haymitch was my lecturer", he laughs a little. "So, how do you like the whole thing?", he then sits beside me.
"I like it, Peeta. It seems fair and just to the whole of Panem", I take his hand and play on its palms.
"Me too", silence reigns. Seconds later, he asks "How about Gale?".
I look up to him and sense nothing but calmness in his eyes. "What about him?", I retort and leaned against his chest. I sigh. "Alright, I was shocked. Who wouldn't be? I've never seen nor heard him in 8 years", I say.
He run his fingers through my arms slowly. "Katniss, don't you think it's high time you and him patch things up?", he says gently.
I contemplated on what he just said. Things will never be the same between Gale and I, so much has happened that we can never be the old us, the old Gale, the old Katniss. He makes me remember Prim, and I'm pretty sure I hurt him with the sight of me. Gale loves Prim, I'm certain of it. I know it makes him crumble, the thought of the possibility that he helped kill Prim. Me resenting him only pushes the possibility further. Then, there's our relationship. Gale loves me, I don't know if he still does, but I'm pretty sure he did. He wanted me for himself, he wanted me to be with him. It could've been that way, I honestly think so. We could've ended up together, hunting in the woods, growing old with each other. But the odds were against us being us, it reaped my sister and Peeta from that bowl and everything changed. From then on, Peeta had my heart for himself. And that is the way things will be forever.
"Katniss?", Peeta interrupts me from my thoughts.
"Hmmm?"
"It's 3 in the afternoon, it's time to meet with the doctor's", he says as he points to the clock.
"Oh..", I flash him a smile.
"Welcome back, Katniss and Peeta", Doctor Collins welcomes us to her office. "How have you two been? Is the little munchkin doing good?", she smiles enthusiastically.
"Oh I bet she is, she's been moving like crazy these past few days", Peeta answers joyfully. "I'm worried she'll break her mother's ribs", he joked.
"Oh, you want a she then?", she asks playfully.
"Peeta thinks it's a girl. I think otherwise", I answer. "But I'm okay either way really, I just want the baby to be healthy".
The doctor nods in agreement. "Okay then, so let's get it checked ."
She hauls me on the bed, let me raise my dress up and dab the wand with the jelly then pushes it on my belly. A thumping is heard, indicating the baby's heartbeat. "Oh the baby's growing well, alright. Just the right size for its age of gestation", she says as she pushes buttons for documentation purposes. "See the little legs there?", she asks Peeta. Peeta nods in delight and squeezes my hand. "Everything seems to be doing fine for both mother and baby", she says as she turns off the machine. She was about to stand and get something from her office when she turns back to us and says "And oh, Mr and Mrs Mellark, it looks like you're going to have a mini-Mr. Boy with the bread ", she says with a smirk as she walks along.
That left both Peeta and I with mouths open. A boy! We're having a boy! I think to myself. I turn to Peeta, and I see he's still dumbfounded. I knew he wanted a girl, so I guess this throws him off a bit. I feel my mood change from ecstatic to worried.
"Peeta, sweetie?"
He looks at me with his soft blue eyes.
"Are you.. uhm.. disappointed?", I worriedly ask him. He must've seen the stressed look on my face as he quickly takes my face in both his hands.
"No silly, I was just shocked", he says as he kisses my forehead.
"Well, I thought.. You always wanted a girl", I say as I lower my gaze down to my belly.
"I never said I wanted a girl, sweetie. I just had a big hunch and thought that we are having a girl", he explains as he lifts my chin up and let my eyes meet his again. "I truly am ecstatic, Katniss. I can now see a little boy following me around the house right now", he giggles as he brought his lips to mine. "Mini ", he continues as he laughs.
A baby boy. I can now see him in my mind. With Peeta's blond hair, Peeta's eyes, Peeta's everything. He's going to be a mini Peeta indeed. I laugh at the thought and turn to Peeta and kiss him deeply as I can.
"Thank you, Peeta", I mumble. "Thank you for us".
Additional A/Ns: (I do love writing this part)
- I know P&K had a girl first, I just had to do that though. :)
- Effie and Haymitch right? hahaha. I never planned on having them. But sometimes, what I plan for the story tends to be deviated cause I have spur of the moment changes and I often end up not following my plans. My hands have a mind on their own. :p
- What do you guys think so far? Tell me what you want to see so that I can consider it.
- And excuse my lame excuse for explaining politics. -.- I really suck at it, but I tried my best :)
- Do REVIEW MORE! Love you, my dear readers! Till next time!
Love,
Sophia-Emm