This story has always had a beginning, a middle and an end since the day I began writing it. I've never been lost or wondered where it was headed. I guess life just got busy as it often does and one day passed after another and another and my updates stopped. But I am back, very much in thanks to those of you who have written me and let me know how much my story has been missed, and I promise if you will be patient with me, we will get to the end of this :-)
To all my loyal and faithful readers who have sent me messages and emails letting me know how much they missed this story, this is for you.
Chapter Forty Nine
The month and a half in Tortuga passed quickly enough for most of The Black Pearl's crew, but for Jack, after being stranded without his ship for two months already, it seemed an eternity. He spent most of his time drinking in the taverns and attempting to plot a course on the maps to his latest treasure hunt. However, since Jack would be using his compass as his real sense of direction, plotting was nearly impossible. So instead, he focused on courses for the future, after he found the rings, or even during if he got bored or distracted enough, for that matter.
Elizabeth enjoyed his company a great deal. They had spent some time together on the island, but most of Jack's time had been occupied with his ship. He had spent the nights with her though and those had been some amazing nights, full of passion and pleasure, learning and wonder.
Now, she found herself with him almost every day. Sometimes he would be engaged in a project, but not very often. They spent a lot of time talking, more time drinking, and even more time in bed. Jack shared a lot of himself with her, but never as much as she would have preferred. It always seemed as if there was a part of himself that he was keeping from her…a tiny piece that perhaps he shared with no one, and yet it upset her because she felt though if he were going to share it with anyone, it should be her. Never-the-less, overall she hadn't been happier in a long time.
The dark thoughts of Will and Thomas that used to haunt not only her dreams, but also her waking moments had scattered to the far edges of her mind. It was only in those rare minutes between wide awake and sound asleep that they came to her, whispering softly and reminding her of happier times and then shading into much sadder. But the terror and the horror that had overtaken her when Jack had come to her rescue were gone. She was bright and happy again, eager to work on projects aboard the ship, or entertain the captain with her conversation over drinks in a tavern, or even play cards or dice with him. He often found it difficult to remember a time when she hadn't been by his side and almost impossible to believe she was the disheveled, lost girl he had picked up in Port Royal so many months ago. Her life had been restored and he had been the one to provide that for her.
Jack had felt himself healing a degree as well. He knew that full healing and forgetting for him wouldn't be accomplished until he was on the open seas again, but watching Elizabeth blossom had been good for him. He missed Anamaria, but in typical Jack fashion, he had managed to push her out of his mind focusing instead on the current beauty that filled his bed. Things were going to get better, he could feel it in his bones and he felt even more reassured every time he flipped open his compass and saw the bright arrow steadily pointing toward what his heart desired most, the Treasures of the Sea. Soon enough, the name Captain Jack Sparrow would be the one that was on everyone's tongues once again and he couldn't wait.
One night, Jack and Elizabeth left The Briar Rose together. Jack had been frequenting his favorite tavern again after the desperation he felt from his last little voyage. Upon his first visit back, he had immediately seen Giselle and evenly met her eyes. She had peeked a curious glance at Elizabeth, but nothing more, and gone back to her work. After that lone incident, she had not even given him so much as a cursory glance when he entered The Briar Rose.
On this particular night, both Jack and Elizabeth had enjoyed their fair share of rum and Jack was more than ready to get back to the room they shared, but Elizabeth seemed distracted so he suggested a walk on the beach to sort things out. They made their way to the outskirts of town and then headed down to the water's edge. Elizabeth was drunk, but she quickly pulled her boots off while leaning on Jack for support.
Although Jack had had more than his fair share as well, he still felt a good bit more sober than he generally felt by this time of night and in a rare gentleman's gesture, offered to carry Elizabeth's boots. She passed them to him and made a run to the water, wobbling off balance as he chased after her. She giggled, a silly almost childish laugh and Jack felt himself smiling as he watched her good cheer upon reaching the edge, attempting to pull her skirt up in time to salvage it from getting wet, but failing miserably. She was already soaked when Jack reached for her hand.
"Come along luv," he said, his voice husky in the moonlight.
"Oh Jack, the water's warm. Let's go for a swim," she pulled him toward the roaring waves.
"Now, now," he tugged at her hand gently. "Every good pirate knows nighttime is no time for a swim. 's dangerous."
"I didn't know Captain Jack Sparrow was afraid of danger," she met his eyes, tipping his hat gently forward, taunting him.
She tugged at his hand, pulling him closer and closer to the water until his feet were splashing in it as well and then she giggled again, reaching down as the next wave washed in and splashing a handful of the spray up at Jack. On a normal occasion, the pirate captain would have found himself angry, but her childish laughter and games were contagious tonight and he took it in good spirits, splashing her back. The two fought back and forth in the water, laughing until Jack had had enough and he caught her around the waist, pulling her to him in a tight embrace and then kissing her passionately. She melted into his arms, falling against him in the rising waves and they kissed for a long moment. Then, without speaking, Jack took her hand and led her up out of the surf and onto the sand. He smoothed out a place large enough for them to lie down and then he fanned his coat out over it.
The mood of the evening had transformed almost instantly and this experience was new for Jack. He was a pirate and he had rutted around in the sand with a dozen or more whores, but this was different. He forced himself to slow things down, which was not easy when Elizabeth was as drunk as she was and only moments ago they had been so active, running, splashing and laughing in the ocean. But he wanted this to be something different and once he had successfully slowed the process, Elizabeth seemed to sober and take notice.
The moon was bright, but they were the only two on the beach and the waves were just high enough to provide the perfect beautiful backdrop. Had Jack been romantic, he would have realized how perfect the night was for sharing this special moment, but being Jack, all he really knew was that this felt different. It felt special. And when they had both climaxed and he had fallen to rest gently on her chest and she tousled his hair lightly through her fingertips, she whispered, "Jack?"
"Mmm?" he mumbled, enjoying the moment too much to interrupt with speech.
She lifted his chin softly with a finger and kissed him deeply. Then she broke away, searching his eyes with her own. "I love you," she whispered softly.
Jack felt his whole body grow tense and he froze, unsure of how to respond.
Elizabeth waited patiently, the thought never crossing her mind that he might not return the sentiment. She had seen the way he had looked at her body. They had just made love, hadn't they? How could he not feel the same?
Jack gave an awkward smile and then took her hand, awkwardly kissing her fingers. Then he pulled away and began gathering his discarded clothing from the beach, shaking out the sand as he went along.
He scolded himself for being foolish enough to put himself in this situation. It was like Giselle all over again. He had known she was fragile, known she was likely to get attached and yet he had pushed her to this point, pushed her to the point where any normal person would fall in love. But Jack was far from normal, especially when it came to relationships. When Madelyn had died, Jack had sworn never to fall in love again and he had held to it, or at least convinced himself he had. He let no one in and yet here was Elizabeth, asking him to let her in and even if he had wanted to, which he didn't particularly think he did, he found that he couldn't. And just what was he supposed to do now? At least when he saw things had gone too far with Giselle he had been able to just write her off and stop the madness as easily as it had started, but Elizabeth was a far cry from some dockside hussy. She was a part of his crew. She was his friend. She was someone he cared about. She just wasn't someone he loved.
When Jack stood, Elizabeth felt hot tears stinging the corners of her eyes. He hadn't said it back. Did that mean he didn't love her? Truth be told, she had been feeling this way for a while, but she had held her words, fearing that maybe Jack didn't feel the same, but tonight had seemed so perfect. She sat up, gathering her own clothing now because she felt so awkward lying there while Jack bustled around her. He was dressed now and shooing her off of his coat. She felt silly, childish almost, like a scorned teen. Will had always given his love so freely and then she chided herself again for comparing the two. Why did she always feel the need to compare Jack to Will? She, more than anyone, knew that they were nothing alike, but for some reason she always expected Jack to behave just as Will would have. It was ridiculous, she decided. So maybe Jack hadn't told her he loved her. That didn't mean he hadn't shown her time and time again. She was on his ship, wasn't she? He had promised to take care of her. He had spent most of his free time with her. He had made love to her more times than she could possibly keep track of. She smiled to herself. He did love her. He just didn't know how to say it. It was almost sweet if she thought about it. She just had to be patient. He had been patient with her in the beginning and given her time to open up to him and now she just had to return the favor. She would be patient and eventually he would come around. She could wait for him to tell her he loved her. She knew when the time was right, it would happen.
Knowing in his heart of hearts that it would only make things worse, but feeling guilty, he took her small hand in his own, "Shall we?" he gestured towards the direction they had come from.
Elizabeth felt a little jolt of electricity when he grasped her hand and the spark of hope she had found earlier ignited, filling her with excitement. He did love her. She didn't need to hear it. For now, this was enough.