A/N: Wow, I got a lot of reviews last chapter. Thanks, people! I am enjoying this, really. I hope you like this chapter. Remember to leave a review and let me know how I am doing. Love, Whitney.
"Somebody please make her stop."
-KANYE WEST
Troy's Mind
I kept telling myself that it was just hanging out. It wasn't some kind of hook up or anything like that. God no, I'd never do that to Chad. I knew he was crazy about Gabriella. I couldn't say that I was certain she had the same feelings for him, but there was nothing I could do about that. It seemed to me like she didn't have feelings for anyone, ever.
I didn't like rap. And I didn't like smoking.
She enjoyed torturing me, I could tell. I mean, it's not like this 'Little Wayne' guy didn't have a good beat, because he did. He had the rhythm or whatever rap singers realm for. I wasn't the type of guy who liked loud, fast music that I couldn't even understand. Seriously, I liked the easygoing, classic rock, or some acoustic music. Call me lame, but I really didn't enjoy Gabriella's music. I just pretended I did.
She led me directly to her kitchen, or well, just strolled there, practically forgetting that I was behind her. I stood, uncomfortably behind her, waiting for her. I tried not to look at her, tried to break my gaze away from her unbelievably attractive figure. God, I was about to lose myself completely. She had this short skirt on, her legs weren't as long as Sharpay's, but she got the point across from just standing. Was that even possible?
Self-control was lost, literally. I ran my fingers through my hair nervously. Man, get it together. I didn't get why suddenly I was so allured to someone so out of reach. Something happened that got me as absorbed as the other guys. What was it? What was it about her that made us all this subdued? What was that magic she held that put us under her spell?
I mean, maybe it was her hair. It was long, it flowed beneath her back, and it was beautiful. God, I didn't just think that, did I? But you'd have to be completely blind to call her unattractive. She just wasn't. Her hair was filled with natural curls, brimming from her forehead. It was captivating, alright. She had turned the radio on, which was built underneath one of her counters. I became motionless when she began swaying her hips along to the beat, disregarding me entirely.
I seriously think she completely forgot I was even behind her. Within a few seconds, though, she twirled back around and faced me, "Something to drink?" She suggested her brown eyes filled with such fake innocence.
"Yeah . . . sure." I agreed, as she prompted me towards the small bar in her kitchen. I fell to the seat, trying to ignore the sudden jitteriness I felt. My legs were practically shaking. God. . .
I'm not even sure why. Maybe it was just hormones. Maybe he was just about to have a complete upsurge. I don't even know. And she acted as careless as she could ever get, that drove me into even more madness.
"Here you go." She handed me a glass of water, and I hoped it could just be my miraculous remedy. Something had to pull me out of this sudden constrain I was feeling. "You look so damn nervous; I'm not going to eat you." She said, while taking a seat next to me. She had that smirk on her face, "I thought we were totally over the whole 'I'm-so-scared-of-you' behavior. You promised, remember?"
I took a large gulp of the water before answering, "I'm not nervous."
"Liar, and did you really like Lil Wayne?" She inquired, raising an eyebrow.
". . . Yeah, of course." Biting my bottom lip, I'm not even sure why I was lying to her. I figured she was the type of girl who tried to shove her likes and dislikes down your throat though. She expected me to like the guy.
"Isn't he fucking tight?" She just grinned. "Best rapper alive, for sure."
I didn't say anything, took another huge swig of water.
"Shit, you're pretty thirsty. I'd imagine all that working out could kill someone. You were sweating like a pig." Yeah, that sometimes happens when you're running for about three hours.
"Yeah, that happens."
"You still looked hot though. Did I mention I love your dad?" That was a weird sentence, almost too weird for me to function. Oh, God no. "Not in that way, you sick fuck." She rolled her eyes, obviously taking in my freaked out expression. "He's tight; he was telling me about how he had sex with all of these chicks than ran into your mom. It was funny; I've never heard a grown man talk about how they used to get pussy back in the day."
I was really trying to act like I didn't hear her say that.
"I misjudged him." Yeah, he misjudged you too.
I took another drink of water, larger than the last. This time, it felt a slight jolt from it. I furrowed my eyebrows; confused on the sudden energy I was feeling. Gabriella held a guiltless expression . . . far too guiltless.
"Did you . . . put something in this?" I asked, looking at the water.
She snorted, "God no, what do you think I am?" She wasn't convincing.
I'm not even sure what I was feeling. I suddenly had a wave of endurance, as if I could run outside, or something insane like that. My heart started beating really fast. I wanted to do something, anything. It didn't feel right. And suddenly, it was like, Gabriella was unavoidable. I couldn't relax.
My legs were churning, like I had some sort of problem. I couldn't keep them still. I couldn't stop fluctuating. I was so restless. I was almost scared.
And I wanted to grab everything.
I mean, even the table seemed undertaking. I didn't feel right, my head was spinning, like I just got done spinning an office chair in circles one million times, like I just got off a roller coaster ride that took me upside down too much. Gabriella didn't seem phased by my strange expressions.
"So, Troy, would you like to go to my room?"
I was taking another gorge of water, hoping to somehow erase the desire I had from everything around me. Her question made me choke on the water, which was kind of embarrassing. She only laughed at me, like that made it any better. "Yeah . . . sure." I had to take this casually, like a friend, hanging out with another friend.
I was craving for other things though.
God, control was my enemy right now.
Even getting out of that chair seemed rough, I almost tripped over something and fell on my face. Gabriella only seemed amused by my every move, like I was some idiot who couldn't walk straight. Yeah, that's pretty much what I was right now.
She led me up the stairs, and I couldn't keep my eyes to myself. Why couldn't I avert my glance? It seemed so easier before, it seemed so simple before. I was behind her and I tried to break my eyes away, but God, I couldn't even regulate anything right now.
It just wasn't right.
Her room was the same as it had been that night her parents invited my family over for dinner. For a girl's room, it wasn't exactly feminine-like. It had posters of guys like David Beckham. It was classy though, the carpet a white color that made it brighter. The windows were big, and she had her own personal balcony. Ridiculous.
She went to her bed and fell onto it, sighing heavily. "Well, this is it, as if you haven't seen it before."
I stood, awkwardly by her door, biting my bottom lip, hoping it might not bleed.
She sat up, and patted the bed, invitingly, "Come on Troy, sit down, chillax."
Grudgingly, I took a seat next to her, not really meeting her eyes.
"Okay, so . . . 21 questions?" She smirked, and my eyes angled to her, not really making a response. "Tell me something about you that nobody in East High knows." She held a domineering smile on her face.
"Um . . . well," Honestly, I didn't know what to say. I looked to my feet, slightly intimidated by her heavy brown eyes, "I'm . . . not wearing socks." God, I was so lame, you'd think she'd just stop.
She just chuckled, "Oh boy, that's so dirty." I could hint the sarcasm in her voice. "No, tell me something filthy, something that you're ashamed of, that it was so disgusting, most of your friends would kill you."
Ha, honestly, I had nothing.
"I don't have anything." I was a guy, but I knew as well as she did that I was pretty sterilized.
"Okay, then . . ." She looked as if she was pondering, "Where is your favorite place to masturbate at?" The question nearly made my eyes jump out of their sockets. Was she demented?
"You're . . . crazy, you didn't just ask me that." I suddenly felt extremely constrained and I couldn't look at her. She had to be crazy, she doesn't even know me and she's asking me these kinds of questions.
"Um, yes I did, you're a guy, so if you don't answer that kind of means you don't masturbate, which is totally lame because I think you and I both know you masturbate." She smirked, as if just completing a puzzle, resulting in a rather, more uncomfortable me.
My legs were erupting. I couldn't control everything, especially downstairs.
You know, this would work out easier if she wasn't hot.
Dang it, I hate my mind.
"Yeah, alright." I bit my bottom lip, again, this time, I swear, I made a sore.
"Admit it." She pushed, her smile never faltering. "Sometimes, I masturbate where you're sitting."
I seriously had to clench my fists to keep myself from just abdicating. I was so close to just diving in for anything. I couldn't take anything any longer. I felt like Zeke. God, this was disgusting.
I wasn't sure whether to react like a crazy man and jump ten feet away, or to just answer the question, despite the fact I was almost sweating from the intensity of the heat in this room. Yeah, it was so hot; I thought I was going to die. Do they have the windows open?
"The shower." The impulse was there, I had to cross my legs like a girl just to keep my sanity. She just gave me a look of shock, yet satisfaction. My expression couldn't have been more distasteful.
"Really? That's hot, how about before bed? I do it before bed, usually."
God, what was wrong with her? My eyes finally met hers in a bizarre state and I could see the amusement swimming in her eyes. She must have been out of her mind. She must have been.
"Gabriella, these questions are a bit personal, I don't even know you that well."
"Don't be a puss; masturbation isn't a crime, Troy." The words curled off of her tongue, making the rest of the room swelter from her pulchritude.
I had to fight every urge from wanting to do just that.
"Alright . . . whatever, yeah." I looked away, still feeling unstable and concupiscent.
"Ooh, I like that." She smirked, her eyes animated with delight. "Now, you ask me a question, make it arousing." Did she have to keep talking like that?
I didn't know what to ask her. I wasn't some kind of sex expert like she obviously was. Her eyes were boring into me, I couldn't ignore it.
Okay, something dirty . . . think like Zeke, think like Zeke . . .
"Alright, um, how many guys, have you, uh . . . you know?"
Her eyes angled, her lips curving in thought, "Well . . . um, what if I tell you I actually don't know the number?" God, had to ask the stupid question. "It's complicated. How far have you gone?" What was this, the sex survey?
"Well," I bit my bottom lip; she was going to seriously laugh at me, so much, "Everything . . . but full sex." I turned red, why was I admitting this to a girl anyways? I have no idea, I could've lied.
"Why didn't you have full sex?" She seemed entertained.
"Someone interrupted it." I answered, not meeting her eyes again.
"Well, shit, Bolton, I misjudged you, you've actually got some gall. I figured you've never even gave a girl pleasure. You seem a bit high-maintenance."
"No, just, most girls aren't worth my time." I sounded so arrogant there; I should've just hit myself. Why I was suddenly opening up to her bewildered me. I think she seriously put something in that water.
"Why?"
"Just . . . in East High, they all get obsessive, and they want to get committed too fast, and then they get jealous over everything. . ." I ran my fingers through my hair, thinking back on the last girlfriend I had, about a year or so ago. She went insane because I had friends that were girls.
"Aw, fuck, I hate jealousy. That's why I like you better than Chad, he's so damn grabby, he always gets jealous over everything and I never even did shit with him. It's annoying." She rolled her eyes.
Yeah, I tried not to believe her when she said she liked me better than Chad. That was just hilarious. She was lying to me, trying to get me to do stuff with her. I wasn't completely oblivious, you know. God forbid she would look at me and smirk though. She did, and I lost control of my body . . . again.
"Well, it's your turn." She gave me a smile, provocative.
"Um . . . God," I didn't have any idea of what to ask. My eyes scanned around her room, searching for something to ask about. I needed a topic. My eyes lay on a bulletin board, pictures I didn't recognize before. There was a picture of her and some guy I never seen before. She looked different. She looked innocent; she wore no makeup, natural. I couldn't help but realize how beautiful she looked, and her smile seemed so real . . . as if her smirks weren't even a sign of happiness from her. She was looking into the guys' eyes, while he looked back to her, the same smile on his face. Her hair was still long, curled, and gorgeous. I found myself staring at it.
"Troy?" She inquired, lulling my thoughts.
I looked back to her, "This is kind of weird, but," I looked back to the picture, then fixated my eyes on her, "When was that? You look . . . different."
Her eyes followed mine back to the picture and I thought I seen a flicker of affliction appear in her eyes as she looked away from it, a sudden anger emitting the room. "Doesn't matter." Her tone became rigid, hateful.
The constriction in the room became unbearable. She was just glaring into the distance, lost in her thoughts, somehow. I looked down, unsure of what to even say to change the mood, to enlighten whatever I said that was wrong. Somehow I always said something messed up to her, somehow I always got tongue-tied around her.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to meddle. I just . . . never mind." Yeah, I was pretty stupid. I scratched the back of my head, my eyes glancing around her room, clenching my bottom lip with aggression.
"He fucked me over, that's all." Gabriella finally said, the same resentment coming from her voice. I found myself watching her now. She was looking out the window, as if reliving something. "That's why I fucking hate you men, you're all the same."
I didn't say anything; I didn't know what to say. I was pretty positive there was nothing I could say to make her feel better. She looked crushed, destroyed. Not only did she look furious, she just looked so broken. I thought she was going to cry. I was positive she was going to cry. Her eyes were like mirrors, reflecting sadness and pain. I suddenly felt sorrow for her, not for the first time either.
"I don't know I just don't like this world. It's like, everyone's out to get me. My parents don't even give a shit about me. Hell, to them, I'm nothing but a mistake." She sniffed her nose, and she had to of been crying. But when I looked her way, she pivoted her eyes, not allowing me to see the tears irrigating from her eyes.
It reminded me of what my dad said, of how Gabriella goes to sleep at night with no one by her side because she pushed away everyone that ever tried to love her. I don't know what I was exactly feeling at the moment. I mean, a few minutes ago, I was ready to thrust myself inside of her, and now, all my self-control had been ravished. I was caving in, except, this time it was more on the emotional side. I was feeling bad, again.
"Gabriella, I'm sure if you talked to your parents, or just, tried to do something for them, they'd be impressed, or just try and talk to them." I don't talk like that, that tender, sensitive tone. I was the good guy, but I was never this softhearted towards a girl, especially one that wanted to have sex with all my friends.
"Fuck, Troy, it's not that easy. No one fucking understands me." Her eyes turned directions, now she was just looking straightforward, emotionlessly. "God, I have no idea why I'm telling you this shit, like you actually care."
"It's alright." My eyes landed on her and she turned to face me, a certain distinction coming from her eyes, some kind of feeling. I thought the girl was heartless, maybe she wasn't. Maybe there was more to it.
"Do you . . . really think I'm unattractive, Troy?" The question was so unexpected, I was shocked at her question. Her eyes never left me, leaving me with a feeling of intimidation.
"No . . . I say a lot of things I don't mean when I'm angry." I confessed, looking away, unable to face her. She was always so blunt, I think it's the thing that scared me the most about her.
"Am I . . . attractive at all, to you?" I could see the curiosity in her eyes, though I was not even looking at her.
Awkwardly, I looked to my feet.
"Of course . . ."
Gabriella's Mind
"You're..." He bit his bottom lip, tightly, as if about to say something he might regret.
I watched him, wondering what he was about to say. He suddenly looked very uncomfortable, his eyes not meeting mine. "I'm what, Troy?"
"You're... beautiful."
"Beautiful?" My heart seemed to dance at the words - he couldn't be serious. He just couldn't be. Nobody has ever called me that since Jason. Even when Jason had said it, it never sounded that wholehearted.
"Yeah." He scratched his head, still not meeting my gaze. I could notice the faint color that had spread across his cheeks and I couldn't help but grin. I wanted so badly to just go and rip his clothes off, the more innocent he acted, the more I wanted to destroy his innocence. I mean, what was wrong with me?
"People usually don't say that to me, with the exception of Zeke, who well, doesn't count." I chuckled, the air around us suddenly filling with seriousness. It seemed weird, almost unbearable, the sudden unusual silence that came between us.
"Really? Well, you are." Troy's eyes had finally met my face again, the color vanishing from his cheeks. He seemed actually surprised.
"... Thanks." A smile appeared across my lips. "You're sweet Troy."
Troy's Mind
"Is it true, that you can sing and dance?" She suddenly asked, her mood seemed to change after I called her that.
God, I really didn't mean to, I just didn't know what else to say. It seemed like I was just making this worse. Chad was going to kill me.
I rolled my eyes, "Who told you that?"
"Sharpay, duh." She chuckled, her mood suddenly changing dramatically. In no time, she was the old, risqué Gabriella again.
"It was a dare." I told her, not meeting her eyes as she watched me with diversity. "I did it out of a dare; I wasn't supposed to get the part. I mean, alright, it was kind of fun, but only because there were these little kids, they looked up to me, it felt good . . . being an inspiration for someone." I didn't mean to sound so ridiculously perceptive. I was never Mr. Sensitive, at least, not usually. I was a basketball player; I was aggressive, not some dancer.
"You're so . . . I don't know; you're like no one I've ever met." Gabriella whispered, her eyes locking onto mine, her comment sounding more genuine than I've ever heard. "Like, all you want to do is make people happy and it's like, you'll do it despite whether you're happy or not. That's so fucked up, but at the same time, it's so . . . thoughtful." Her eyes sparkled as she said this, and then looked away. Suddenly, a grin appeared on her face. She moved to her feet and gave me a mischievous grin. She grabbed my hands, attempting to yank me off the bed, "Teach me to dance."
"Gabriella, I don't dance--"
"I know you can!" Unexpectedly, she gripped me off the bed, our bodies colliding. I almost fell over, hadn't her hands been in mine. My eyes snapped up to hers and I felt unstable, all over again. "Hold on." She broke away from me for a second, turning up her radio's stereo that was underneath her television in her room. A rather slow, melodic sound came on. "Aw, I fucking hate this song . . ." She mumbled, a look of sorrow appearing in her eyes. "Whatev, I don't care anymore." I heard her mutter, as she made her way back towards me.
She grabbed my hand again, eagerly, "Come on, don't be a douche bag, Troy!"
"Gabriella, I really forgot how to, I swear . . ." The expectancy in her eyes only made it harder. She drew me so close that I felt my breath fade away, and I felt my entire body weaken.
"This was me and Jason's song, I hate it." She whispered, looking back to the radio. I didn't know who Jason was, I figured he might have been the guy on her bulletin board.
You know I'm such a fool for you; you've got me wrapped around your finger.
Do you have to let it linger?
Her eyes trailed back to mine and our eyes met, brown and blue. "I'd like to just forget, you know? Help me?" A grin appeared across her lips, and she looked to our hands. I suddenly realized we've been holding hands.
I broke away, the intensity getting to me, "Gabriella . . . you and I are just friends, this isn't fair to Chad or . . ."
Before I could continue, I noticed her body venturing so close to me. My lips instantly shut and I couldn't say anything, becoming completely consumed in our intimacy. I could feel her breathing against my face. Sultry, yet addictive, I gave in so much. Her hands appeared on my chest, and I could feel the ends of her fingertips, savoring the touch of my muscles. My eyes were stuck on hers and the pressure of the moment was so hard to deal with. My urges were becoming more and more prominent and I found myself doing something I rarely do - I was moving in towards her.
And I'm in so deep; you know I'm such a fool for you. You've got me wrapped around your finger.
I could almost feel the heat of her lips, my eyes had already closed and I felt like my body had been lifted off of the ground entirely. Gravity seemed irrevocable. The centimeters between us, they were boundless.
Breathing was lost.
And then, I felt a rush of air. My eyes opened and I found Gabriella standing inches away from me, a look of disgust on her face, "It's really late, you should probably leave." I became so confused, I'm sure it was dead-panned on my face. "I'll see you tomorrow, Troy." She said, her voice suddenly penetrating me.
Wordlessly, I looked at her, still not understanding what had just happened. Why did she back away? Why did I not want her to back away? Why was I about to kiss her? What was wrong with me?
I almost felt rejected.
Pitifully, I grabbed my jacket from her desk, my eyes on her one final second, and then I walked out the door, not sure on anything anymore.
END OF CHAPTER
A/N: Why didn't Gabriella go for it? WOWOWOWOW. Unexpected? Exciting. Review and we'll see what happens now that Troy's kind of . . . obsessed? BTW, keep in mind it's mostly physical attraction. Most guys wouldn't fall in love that quickly, so right now... it's just, he's just feeling urges, you know. Hope you enjoyed the dirty 21 questions! :P Review, review, review! Love, Whitney.