Harry Potter & the Demon Blood
Don't own HP so shoot me if I say other wise.
Chapter Ten
"Welcome to a new year, one and all," Dumbledore started, instantly silencing everyone in the great hall. "I have several announcements to make. For one, even though most do not know it, the Dark Lord has been revived and even attacked the Ministry near the end of last year. This will mean that there will be aurors posted around and in the school. Do not worry though, no dances, Quidditch matches, or Hogsmeade trips will be canceled. Two, for those who are new and those who have yet to learn," Here he looked pointedly at three people. Harry, George, and Fred. "The Forbidden Forest is just that. Forbidden. Three, there have been about a thousand items that have been added to the contraband list posted outside Mr. Filch's (that is his name right?) office. Anyone who is found with those items will have them confiscated and receive detention. Four, we will be having a dueling club hosted by several of the aurors and one Alastor Moody. Fifth, this year's DADA teaching position will be taken up by Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks. And finally, after dinner I hope you all have a good year. Gazuntight Achoo and Arangedo Beethoven Ice Cream."
With that food appeared and they started eating. Every one talk through out dinner, well Ron more spewed chewed food but still. Finally desert came and everyone started eating different deserts. Suddenly there was a loud farting noise as a large greenish cloud covered everyone. Several gagged, thinking it was really some one who farted. Those who didn't smelt something akin to the desert that they had just been eating but stronger. When the obscuring cloud cleared they all looked around, trying to see what happened. They all shrugged and went to eat. When they looked at their sweets, it had turned into human and animal feces, either solid, dry, wet, soggy, or diarrhea, as well as insects, larva, puke, hair gel, grease, lard, fat, drool, some glowing liquids that were sticky, mucus and much more that they didn't even want to know about. Several people turned around and puked on the floor. After a minute the fart sounded again and the cloud appeared.
This time when it cleared all the food was back to normal for most, as some had thrown up on theirs. There was the sound of a huge latch unlocking and everyone looked to see the scene on the ceiling seem to be lifted up to the side like it was on hinges. There was a figure shrouded by shadow looked down at them like he was looking down into a lizard tank. They looked at the man for a moment before he pulled out a scroll and opened it. He looked like he placed it over the 'opening to the tank'. Words scrolled up from the bottom. A strange voice began to speak, reading the words as they appeared at the bottom of the page.
"A long time ago in a school to the north of London, there were four students. Those four pranked the hell out of every single person there. Those who are old and wrinkly enough to have been alive and be a teacher now know what they were called. They were the Marauders.
"Now me and my cohorts have studied long and hard, for years even, and are ready to continue the legacy. No one will be safe, not even the teachers and the Head boy and girl.
"This is your warning for the Marauding Syndicate has come to give you hell as great as our idols did. We hope you enjoyed your meal. We sure enjoyed watched you all throw it back up!" The voice ended with a laugh. The figure pulled the scroll back, pocketed it, and closed the 'lid' before there was the sound of a latch locking again. Everyone looked very pale. Suddenly Severus shot up with a death glare aimed at Harry and the pranking twins. He stormed over.
"How did you do this?" He roared as the three stood up to meet him.
"A good evening to you too Professor." Harry said. The twins echoed him.
"Which one of you three brats did this?" He had just been about to put some pudding into his mouth when the cloud first appeared and what greeted his eyes when he looked back to his spoon was a glob of slightly oozing feces. Yeah he was mad.
"But Professor we didn't do it for once." The twins said. "But if we find out who, we are going to have to start praising him and his cohorts. That prank was too great."
Snape turned to Harry.
"I can't believe that you are giving me the credit to have done something on this scale of power and knowledge Professor. I'm flatted that you would think so highly of me and all, but only in hell could I do this sort of thing, as you think me a devil."
Snape scowled and walked away. The three sat down and Hermione let out a scoff.
"I can't believe some one did that. That was a really high level charm too. I wonder who did it?"
"Who knows." Harry said. He gave a look to the twins that nobody else noticed. "It could have been anyo-" There was a sudden sound of crystal chimes and water dripping in a cave. "Hang on a second." He reached into his pocket and pulled out his hell phone. He flipped it open easily and hit talk while raising it to his ear at the same time. "Hey."
'"Hey yourself. Are you at dinner?"' Mya's voice came from the speaker. Everyone else was looking at him odd, as they didn't hear what she was saying.
"Yeah, I guess I forgot that it took so long. Sorry."
'"It's ok. Anyways can you still talk to me?"'
"Yeah, none of the teachers know about this kind of thing, so they will just pass it off as me beings some insane man holding trash to his head." Harry laughed as did Mya.
'"What about your friends?"' Harry glanced at those around him.
"Right now they are staring at me like a nut case and not moving. In fact the whole school is staring. I really should have turned the ringer down. Oh well to late now. Anyways how are you?"
'"Oh Cray is being an ass again, mostly about us being an item and all. Currently he is in 'his' corner with a bruised arm. Aside from that I'm fine."'
"You really should lighten up on your brother. I mean just because he teases you and is older, does not mean you get to pound his arms off."
'"You do it too."'
"True but I only do it when he does something like insult you or decides to make sure I'm good enough to be anywhere near you."
'"Yeah, you would think dad would be like that, not Cray."'
"Ha! If your dad was like Cray, he would have ripped my lungs out as soon as he found out I was even alone with you. Then he would ask me what I had to say for myself and well no lungs means no talking and he would rip my head off for not replying. Course Mutt face would get mad and they would get in a fight and in the end Mutt face's wife would come 'put him down' and drag him home after giving your dad a look that really can kill. I swear that woman can get such an attitude at times. If not for Mutt face being just as stubborn she would have killed him long ago."
'"Like me when my heat gets to a peak? I remember that time when, just because I was having one of those moments, I decided to get us into a fight with a gang and you ended up fighting them all at once. How is your chest anyways?"' Harry subconsciously rubbed his chest.
"Don't remind me. It was bad enough having that happen and hope that it never does again. I swear if there were meds for your problem I would spend all my money to get enough for a life supply times ten. Oh well talk to you later. Love you, bye."
'"Love you too."' Mya said before she hung up with Harry. He closed his hell phone and pocketed it. He turned back to his friends.
"What?" He asked at their stares.
"What the bloody hell?" The Weasleys all yelled.
"Uhhh." Was Neville's reply.
"Who where you talking to and how can your cell phone work at Hogwarts?" Hermione asked.
Luna was oblivious.
"Well in answer to your question Hermione, I got it charmed to work here. As for who I was talking to, that would be my girlfriend."
"What is she muggle?" Ron asked.
"Well duh. She's home schooled so there is no problem with any meetings we have. So if she wants she can come here because she doesn't have to worry about school nights."
"Wait, she knows about magic? You told her? Harry do you know how much trouble you are in right now?" Hermione seemed to be panicking while being stern at the same time.
"Yes she knows about magic. No I didn't tell her and thus I'm not in trouble. And as an answer your next question, her mom was a squib." Harry said before he went back to eating his desert.
"Mr. Potter, the headmaster would like to see you in his office. The password is grumble gum." McGonagall said a few moments later as she walked up.
"Yes ma'am." Harry replied. McGonagall nodded and walked away.
"Ah man poor you chap, first day and in the office when you didn't do anything." The twins said. Harry just shrugged and headed to the office.
When he got there he saw Dumbledore there with several others from the staff. All of them were in the Order.
"What is it Dumbledore?" Harry asked.
"Show the headmaster respect brat." Severus snapped. Remus was about to pounce on him when Tonks stopped the werewolf from mauling the potion master.
"Why? He holds none of my respect after what he did to my godfather. Now what is it that you want old man?"
"I was wondering who you were talking to on that muggle device."
"Well that would be my girlfriend, though it is none of your business."
"Harry I must insist that I meet your girlfriend so that I can make sure she is saf-"
"Shut up old man! My personal life is just that! Mine! It is none of your business who I date or see and I can take care of my self. And don't you dare say it is only for my safety because my life is not safe when I am around you. This is supposed to be the safest place in England right? Well then why is it that every year I am here my life is threatened. So back off."
"But Harry-"
"That is Mr. Potter to you old man. You are not my friend and thus you may not call me on a first name basis."
Every one in the room was stunned. Here was a boy who was supposed to be the goody goody, and he was back talking THE Albus Dumbledore. The man that no one ever talked back to.
"Brat how dare you talk to the headmaster that way!" Snape started.
"Silence Professor Snape. I will talk with respect to those I see fit to get it. Now how about you pleasantly leave and go work on a potion that can consume your time in a useful manner rather then wasting it pointlessly on me and your grudge against my father."
Snape stayed silent for a moment before turning around and walking out of the office. Every one, even Albus was a little shocked. No one had ever managed to get Severus to walk out of a room with out making some remark or scowl. Usually even if he walked out with out one of those he walked out with a smirked that meant he had done something mean.
"Now then, is there anything else you want to try and manipulate old man?" Harry asked with a gallon of venom.
"My dear boy, I only have your best wishes in mind."
"Don't you dare dear boy me old man. And as for my best wishes? Guess what, I can figure them out on my own and being abused by my uncle for most of my life is not one of them. And know what's really funny everyone? The wrinkled old bastard here knew. My letter was addressed, CUPBOARD UNDER THE STAIRS! Now tell me old man how is being abused in my best wishes? Are you trying to see if I'll end up like Tom? He went through the same thing and it was because of you. So tell me, what will you do if I do turn out like Tom? Kill me? Pass the burden onto a mere child? One that you will treat all the same? Old man, there is no Dark Lord Voldemort. There is only Dark Lord Dumbledore!" Harry finished. Every one gasped. Dumbledore looked like a giant had smacked him with a bundle of bricks. Harry walked out of the room with out a second word.
He went straight to the dorms. Of course because of the old man he didn't know the password. Great.
He asked nicely, but the fat woman wouldn't budge. Finally after several different types of attempts he finally snapped.
"Open right now or you will think what my godfather did to you in third year as a paper cut compared to what I will do." Harry said. "I am tired and I want in. Dumbledore held me up so I don't know the stupid password and I don't care. Now move!" The fat woman promptly swung open. "Thank you." Harry walked inside with out another word.
He looked around. There was no one up yet.
Good.
He looked at the clock. It read 11:50.
Good they would be down soon. He sat down in a chair to wait.