Author's Note : You are going to be in Laney Brooke's Point of View. You are not Y/N, but you are going to be Laney.
Therefore, YOU = LANEY.
Reason? I am not that good of a writer yet so bear with me, please. Hihi.
AOT - not mine.
Plot & Imagination - mine.
Disclaimer : This may be triggering, mentions of abuse.
Six Months. That's how long you have stayed in the godforsaken relationship. Six months of trauma, violence, and abuse. Yes. Abused. Despite being the top cadet in your class, known for your elite-grade fighting skills, quick wits, and agility, you were abused - physically, verbally, psychologically, and sexually. You were manipulated and blamed, humiliated and terrorized, threatened and shamed. For what? For nothing? For fun? For pleasure? Your pain for his entertainment? For dominance? For what? Why did you have to go through that?
You were stripped off of your walls of confidence and life. Your once bright and sparkling eyes turned to a dull, lifeless shade of brown. It used to be full of hope and vigor. Now, you're just a shell. An empty shell of a person who remained to exist for a cause. At least, your life could still mean something. A titan-killing machine. No more than that.
That's what Flagon Turret did to you.
Flagon was charming. He was tall, strong, and good-looking. He was one of the rising soldiers, part of Commander Sadis' trusted men on the field along with your friends - Miche and Erwin. He was always surrounded by people. Always had a cocky smile on his face and he was just so good to you at first.
But red flags appeared one by one, from manipulating you to stay away from your friends to the point where he convinced you that all you needed was him. You became dependent on him, but in the end, he would destroy you then would make up, and say things that would convince you to think that it was all your fault. Yours. Not his.
You kept on questioning yourself on how you became so dependent on an arrogant piece of trash, that you regarded yourself as a weak, piece of failure when you used to stand tall and mighty, sure of yourself and every resolve that you had in your life.
Simple arguments would always lead to a big fight, with him on the winning side, manipulating you to be the one who is at fault. Always. He would find the right words to pull the trigger and point the gun at you. And you accepted each bullet. Until he was able to tear down everything that you used to believe in.
It started when he said that you were hanging out too much with your friends, then when you were talking with them during idle hours during training, or when resting after a tedious expedition, even casual conversations while riding your horses, everything that involves socializing with others who are not him.
He'd always humiliate you for being too lax or being too eager to train that you were so convinced that you were giving your comrades a hard time during training. Then during expeditions, he would blame you for not doing enough or overdoing something. Your fire started to burn out little by little, by his words, treatment, and actions.
And every time you would try to leave, he would be good to you again. He would make promises, and apologize for the way he had spoken to you. He'd say sweet nothings and vows to never hurt you again. He made you believe that he's the only one who can love you, despite your flaws.
Even after he hit you, he would soothe your pain. He would kiss your bruises and tell you that it was your fault and that he wouldn't have done that if you had listened. Your breaking point was when he kept on taking you over and over again, against your will. Giving in because you believed that you're good for nothing. You're damaged goods. Titan food.
It was Erwin who rescued you as Hange told him that she saw bruises and trauma on your body when she was putting bandages on your injured arms and legs. As your uniform was ripped and torn, Hange saw these marks on unusual places - your biceps, your thighs, your stomach, your neck, and so on. She knew these weren't caused by titan fights or training spars. She knew domestic violence when she sees one.
Hange cried with you that day. She cried that she failed to notice and that she thought you were just distancing yourself from all the grief around. With the increasing death toll, it was common for a soldier to keep things to themselves for quite a while. You did not hold it against her. You decided to keep it all to yourself. It was your fault that you ignored all the red flags, that you were drowning and you needed help.
"No! That's not true," Hange firmly objected, "It wasn't your fault! You probably didn't know how to ask for help! You were drowning and we, your friends failed you. I'm so sorry, Laney. I'm terribly sorry!"
Erwin just stormed his way to where Flagon was and told him to follow him to a clearing nearby, free of Titans, and beat him to a pulp. He threatened the man that if he saw him lay as much of a finger on a strand of your hair, he would 'accidentally' feed him to a titan.
Flagon had to be admitted to the hospital wing for two weeks for broken ribs, facial cuts, and dislocated shoulders and limbs. Erwin said there was a titan attack and they were caught off guard, Flagon's wires were caught by a titan and he was smashed into a tree, and he caught him just in time to cut the wires and saved him.
Flagon did not say a word because Erwin is a vindictive man, and Miche was eyeing him with murderous intent. Hange was almost willing to throw a dagger at his head and that woman has a very good aim. After that incident, he did not approach you again for a couple of weeks.
But you knew he was seething. He was angry that you told your friends about it. You know that he would do anything to get back at you.
The first time he tried was after one of your training. You didn't feel the need to be accompanied to the Mess Hall plus you wanted to have a bath first before getting dinner. He pulled you roughly to one corner and caged you between his arms.
"Do you think you can run away from me forever?" He rasped against your ear as he wedged his knee between your legs and rubbed his hips against your abdomen. You tried to move, but you just can't, your whole body was immobilized by shock as it trembled upon feeling his hard erection on your body, all trauma resurfacing in your head. You tried to push him, but he pinned your arms above your head, while the other was on your mouth, silencing your cries and sobs.
You looked at him with pleading eyes, tears falling from fear, as he started to attack your neck with his mouth.
"Help me, please anybody," you begged so hard and wished for somebody to save you, to find you. Thankfully, Hange's booming voice echoed through the hallway and it stopped Flagon from whatever he was doing.
He pushed you violently against the wall, and you winced in pain as your head hit the surface, "If you tell anybody about this, I swear I'll kill you," he murmured against your ear in a low, dangerous voice. Then he fled before Hange turned toward that hallway.
You collapsed on the ground, your whole body trembling, breathing heavily as you tried to muffle your sobs but Hange's ear picked it up and found you on the floor, and rushed to your side with a very worried and alarmed face.
"What happened, Laney?! It's Flagon, wasn't it? I'll kill him!" But before Hange could even stand up, you pulled her arm and begged her not to do anything or tell anybody because you didn't have any more trouble.
Hange pulled you up and wrapped her arms carefully, noticed how you winced from her touch and muttered strings of curses. "You are never walking alone ever again, not without me or Erwin, Miche, or anybody. You are going to move to my quarters starting tonight. You have no option to say 'no', you hear me?"
You nodded as you tried to compose yourself and wiped the tears from your eyes.
"Don't tell Erwin. He would kill him," you begged and Hange only sighed because she knew Erwin, too and he had once beat the shit out of Flagon and told everyone that it was because of a titan attack. "He's up for the Commander post and I don't want to ruin it. He deserves the spot if Commander Sadis decided to retire."
"Fine. But just this once. If he ever tries again, I will make sure to have his blood on my hands," Hange warned and you nodded. She fixed your hair and your uniform and made sure that you were well-composed. "What did the bastard threaten you with?"
"He said he'll kill me," you answered in a hushed voice, scared that he might hear your conversation, "I just, I couldn't... He tried to.. I-I couldn't do anything... I'm sorry," you sobbed and Hange just held your trembling body.
"You did nothing wrong, Laney. I swear, I'm going to kill him if not for your kind, delusional mercy towards him, I will. Say the word and I fucking will. Come on, you're shaking. Let's gather your stuff and move you from there. Promise me that you will never walk on your own or be on your own," she asked and you nodded against her shoulder with a soft, "Yea."