So as you know, this is the first chapter of my multi-chapter fic Lost Soul. You all probably hate me now because I haven't updated this darn thing for two weeks, but I have a legitimate explanation. And here it is: I had my laptop taken away two weeks ago, and I just got it last night. I typed up the first chapter today, and I think it turned out well. So enjoy :)

And if you were wondering what the hell was going on in the prologue, I will clear that up for you. Sorry for making that a tad bit confusing. The prologue is a compilation of notes taken by a reporter who works for a crime unit (like in CSI or NCIS). These notes were published in Westerville's newspaper on the date that was on top of each entry (The first entry being on May 1, 1957 and the last entry being on May 10, 1957). So there you go. I'm really sorry if you didn't get it. In retrospect, I didn't think that what I wrote was actually clear. You could have easily assumed they were from something else.

This is my fourth time uploading this. Every time I uploaded it, I always found a mistake or that something was missing. Hopefully, this will be my last time.

I hate myself for not checking what I just typed. I think that's my problem...I'll try and fix that later. But now, on with the story!

2012 - Fifty-five years later...

Harsh shoves.

Withering Stares.

Hurtful slurs.

It all seems familiar to him. But still, it hurts and cuts deep. He thought it would all end as soon as he hit high school. Soon? Maybe. Now? Probably not.

He can't even walk down the halls without someone pushing him into a row of lockers. His short but masculine physique slightly denting it. The cold, hard metal causing bruises on his back and shoulders.

But he just can't do anything about it. He can't just tell anyone. His teachers surely wouldn't listen; they wouldn't even care. It already seems like they don't care at all. They don't even realize that one of their students is being harassed by practically the entire student body. They dismiss it like it happens every day with a wave of a hand or a shake of his or her head. They believe that what their students are doing is just something teenagers do and that it will just pass. But you know what? It's never going to "just pass." It's just going to keep building and building, making this already big problem even bigger.

His other classmates…Now that's a laugh. He knows that they wouldn't do anything either. They're just as scared as he is. They can't even risk getting hurt for helping the gay kid.

Yes, Nicholas Duval was gay. Oh, run for your lives!

But it's not like one touch would suddenly turn them gay. It most certainly does not work that way. And besides, Nick wasn't even planning on coming out. He was fine as he was, hiding who he truly was from the people who most hated him. But Nick was practically forced out of the closet by those stupid homophobe jocks who just so happened to find out.

He liked musicals. So what?

He wasn't a big fan of sports. Big whoop.

He idolized female celebrities. Who cares?

But none of these things were accepted as "normal" around here.

They thought it was weird when he was the only guy out of all of the students in North Westerville High that never tried out for any sports.

They thought it was weird when he was always the first one in and the last one out when changing in the locker rooms.

They thought it was weird when he started humming Broadway tunes as he walked down the halls to his next class.

They thought everything Nick did was weird.

But those things didn't exactly scream that he was gay either. All of the students, and even the teachers, just assumed that Nick was.

Nick didn't come to this school as a gay teenager. He came to this school as a closeted gay teenager. He never even thought about coming out to anyone. But the assumptions made Nick think twice about everything. He didn't know if he should muster up his courage and just take the risk. But he knows what that could lead to…

But everything isn't always sunshine and rainbows. There's always the darkness that just creeps up and ruins everything. And that's exactly what happened to Nick.

Nick had this journal. And this journal was practically his best friend. He brought it everywhere with him. He carried his whole life on that thing, exaggeration or not. But everything was in there – dreams, stories, fears, thoughts, drawings, journal entries, and most importantly, his big secret.

But if this journal fell into the wrong hands, Nick wouldn't know what to do. He'll most probably freak out and start hyperventilating or something, so he can never let that happen. Ever.

He could never let anyone know that he was gay. He'll be looked at differently, and Nick could not take that.

He was scared. Everybody already thought that something was wrong with him, and they were already assuming he was gay, but Nick can't let them know that it was actually true.

But where was it? Where was the damn journal?

Rummaging through his backpack, Nick frantically searched for the paperback journal that he could categorize as a prized possession. His only prized possession.

He couldn't just lose it. Nick's not that stupid. Or was he? Because he just lost his fucking journal. His journal. The journal with his deepest, darkest secret. Where the hell would he have put it?

The last place he went to where he knew he had he journal was the library. Nick ran. He had to get there before anything bad happened.

By the time he got to the doors of the school's library, Nick couldn't believe his eyes. Yes, his journal was there…but it was in the hands of North Westerville High's quarterback, Brad Nolan.

Oh, shit.

That smirk on Brad's face told Nick everything. He knew. And if the school's quarterback knew, then everyone will know. The most popular guy at school can spread news like wildfire.

Nick just lost it. His life was ruined.

Walking through the front doors of the North Westerville High the next day, Nick could have never been more embarrassed his entire life. The looks everyone gave him proved what he thought all along.

Everyone found out.

Stupid Brad just had to be a douche and tell everyone. And it was only, what? A day since he read Nick's journal? Nick just couldn't believe it. He was outed. He was not safe anymore.

Ever since Nick was outed, it seemed like everyone in the school, including the teachers, would avoid him like the plague. He was not normal. Being gay, to them, had never been normal.

The news had spread quickly, covering the entire town in less than a week. Sure, his family was accepting, but that was only two people out of all the others who reside in Westerville, Ohio. Everyone else around him thought he was a disgrace – classmates, teachers, his neighbors, store employees, every single one of them. To them (which was practically the entire town of Westerville), Nick wasn't like them. Ever since Nick was labeled as the "town fag," he could never be like them.

At school, Nick was always picked last for everything. Nobody talked to him, but to Nick, that was completely fine. He didn't like to talk to anyone. Actually, he didn't like to talk in general.

He sat alone in the corner near the dumpster at lunch. No one wanted to be his partner for anything. He was ignored by everyone – students and teachers, alike. The only time he would actually get "noticed" was when he would get harassed by the school jocks, making him be seen by the whole student body and become the laughing stock of the entire school.

But for some reason, harassment aside, he liked it that way. He liked the solitude, the independence, the peace. He could get away and hide away from it all. They wouldn't even notice; they wouldn't even care. Nick Duval had never been important.

But that peacefulness is always snatched away before he could fully grasp it and call it his own. It's always gone as fast as it has come. Nothing that's good could ever be his.

But for once, can't he finally have it? Everything gets taken away from him – his secret, the peace, his own dignity – so why can't he? Why can't he have it?

Oh, right…

Because Nick Duval was never important…

To his classmates.

To his teachers.

To everyone.

…And Nick believes them.

Reviews are always welcome :)

They bring happiness to the world (to me).

The next chapter will probably be uploaded next week, but I'm not making any promises. But once summer it here and school has ended, I'll make sure that I upload this thing and make you guys all happy.