A/N: Hey everyone! Sorry this took me so long to update. I have been super busy with college. I will try and get back to my normal updates which would be about once a week. Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter and I would appreciate it if you would tell me what you thought of it by leaving a review.
Will wasn't sure what to do at this point anymore. He had just kissed Rachel when they really should be getting a divorce. Neither of them spoke for a while as they let their minds wander.
This is just great, Will thought. Kissing her only made things more complicated although I did enjoy it and I think she did too. Maybe this isn't as terrible as it seems, he continued to think. Meanwhile Rachel was contemplating her own thoughts.
I never thought that going to New York would be like this. I did enjoy the kiss though and so did he obviously. Maybe things will work themselves out, Rachel thought.
"Maybe things aren't as bad as they seem," Rachel said out loud this time. Will looked at her in surprise since he was just thinking that as well.
"You know I was just thinking that," he chuckled.
"Really?" Rachel said as she let out a small laugh.
"Yeah. The only problem is what are we going to do about our marriage? We can't just go back to Lima as a married couple," Will said. "I would definitely get fired," he added.
"You're right. I don't know what to do though Will. I mean I think that I really could be in love with you but marriage is a big commitment. Especially for us since we did not even plan to get married," Rachel said. "I mean we never would have gotten married at all if we never had gotten drunk in the first place," Rachel added.
"You're right. You are also so young to be married, Rachel and what about Emma and I?" Will said. "I mean we were just starting to rebuild our relationship," he added. Rachel looked a bit hurt at his statement. How could he be thinking of Emma when he just kissed me? Rachel thought to herself.
Will could tell that he had said the wrong thing by mentioning Emma. "I'm sorry Rach. I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that we were working on building a romantic relationship together but that was before New York, before I realized how I felt about you," he said.
"So you don't want to be with Emma anymore?" Rachel asked with a hint of hopefulness in her voice.
"Honestly I don't know Rach. I mean I love her and I think I always will but that doesn't mean that I don't love you either," he said. "Think of it as you and Finn," Will added after a pause. "You still probably love him don't you? You don't just get kissed by him and not feel anything," he said.
Rachel thought for a moment. Will did bring up a great point. "I guess I do but I love you as well. This is so confusing," Rachel said in a sigh.
"It is. I don't know what to do. Aside from Emma and Finn though what are we going to do about a divorce?" Even if we love each other, we can't hide being married for a year till you graduate," Will said. "I mean we can't hide that from everyone, especially your dads," he added.
"That's true. I don't know Will. I just don't know. It's not like we can just announce our marriage the day of graduation either," Rachel said while getting upset. Will pulled her into a hug. "It's going to be okay Rachel," he said trying to comfort her.
"My dads are going to be so disappointed if they ever find out and if we stay married they most likely will find out," Rachel said. "They already seemed suspicious of the way you act around me," she said. Will remembered the phone conversation between Rachel and her dads a couple of hours ago which made him hold Rachel even tighter in his arms to make her feel that she was safe and comforted.
"Why don't we go back to the hotel for a bit?" Will asked while slowly letting go. Rachel looked up at him and nodded. This had been the most confusing day for both of them. So much had happened in so little time and now that they knew how they both felt about each other, it only made things more complicated. They both have feelings for each other but they also have feelings for others as well so how were they supposed to act around each other now?
They walked back to the hotel with Will's arm around Rachel's shoulder. They made it there in about twenty minutes since all of their destinations that they made today were in walking distance of the hotel. It was only midafternoon but it felt like much later. The day had just dragged on with them going frantically from one place to the next.
Once in the hotel they took the elevator to the room since both were tired from walking all morning. As they got to the door Will searched for the key but couldn't find his, luckily though Rachel had one in her purse. She smiled at him as she handed him the key to the room. Will opened it and they both walked inside and immediately sat down so they could rest their feet.
Will found the remote to the television and flipped it on not being able to stand the sound of silence anymore. Nothing interesting was on so he just left it on a local news station. He got up from his chair and went over to Rachel who was lying on the bed.
"Mind if I join you?" he asked. Rachel nodded and he took a seat next to her. He stretched his body out so that his head was resting against the pillows with his arms at his side, one which had accidentally brushed up against Rachel's arm causing her to glance up at him for a second and then back at the television. The silence was bothering him so he broke it.
"So Rach, excited for the summer?" he asked. She looked at him with a confused look on her face and he felt awkward asking that question. He was trying not to mention anything about being married for once to see if they could actually have a normal conversation. After much hesitation, Rachel answered him.
"I guess so. I really want to focus on my singing so that we will be unstoppable for glee this year. What about you?" she asked. Will thought for a moment. He didn't really have anything planned either.
"I don't know actually. I'll probably just do the same thing I always do. Sit at home and wish I was doing something exciting," he said sounding less than enthusiastic.
"Sounds fun," Rachel said sarcastically. "Although I can see why you never go out," Rachel added.
"Why is that?" he asked.
"Well you married me after getting drunk in one night, think of how many wives you could end up with if you went out all the time," she joked and he let out a small laugh.
There was another pause as both returned to watch the television. Will couldn't concentrate on the screen though. He was too focused on watching Rachel. She was sitting next to him just like they had been when he woke up his morning. When they were both naked. Will realized that he never even asked her about how she felt about them having sex last night. He was pretty sure that Rachel was a virgin which made him feel even worse about the whole situation. He didn't know if he should bring it up or just let her talk to him about it, but either way it was bothering him inside.
"I'm so sorry Rachel," he blurted out before he could stop himself.
Rachel looked at him confused again. "What? Why?" she asked.
"For last night and I'm not just talking about getting married, I'm talking about when we woke up this morning," he said choosing his words carefully.
"What do you mean woke up this morning?" she asked confused as ever.
I might as well just say it, Will thought. "Well it was pretty obvious that we had sex last night considering that we were both naked when we woke up," Will said. There was a pause as Rachel was trying to think of something to say. She didn't want to discuss that part of the night.
"Oh that," Rachel said while avoiding eye contact.
"That's all you have to say?" Will asked confused.
"To tell you the truth I didn't want to bring it up. Last night was my first time and I don't even remember it," Rachel said as tears started to spill out of her eyes. Will looked at her and placed one hand on her shoulder trying to give her comfort while his other one went to her back where he slowing started to rub circles.
"I'm sorry Rachel. This is all my fault. I have screwed up everything for you. You deserve better than what I gave you last night," Will said. Rachel looked at him and could tell that he was truly sorry.
"It's okay Will. I mean it may not have been my perfect vision of my first time but at least it was with someone as caring as you," Rachel said. Will looked at her with a small smile on his face and leant in to give her a gentle kiss on lips.
"I'm glad you feel that way Rachel. I was afraid that you would have been mad at me for thinking that I was taking advantage of you," Will said even though in the back of his head it felt like he had a little bit. Again he thought back to what Rachel's dad's had said to her about feeling uncomfortable around him. It was too late though because he was pretty sure that he had already crossed that line.
"No I'm not mad, disappointed, but not mad at you," Rachel said. Will looked confused at her statement which Rachel had noticed.
"Not like that Will. I'm sure you performed lovely," Rachel said choosing her words carefully. He looked at her with a grin on his face. "I just meant disappointed in how I can't remember," Rachel corrected herself. Will nodded at her. He understood what she meant and how she must be feeling. Not wanting to push the subject any further both returned to watch the television.
Will leaned his head back into the pillow and put his hands behind his head while Rachel got up the courage to move her head to rest on his chest. He looked down and smiled to himself as he moved his arm around her back.
In no more than five minutes both were drifting off to sleep for a midafternoon nap. Will had just closed his eyes when he heard his phone go off. He groaned as he reached for his phone out of his pocket. Emma calling his screen read. He burrowed his eyebrows in confusion as he answered the call.
"Emma? What's up" he said.
"Is it true Will?" he heard Emma shout on the other line.
"Is what true?" Will asked confused.
"You know. That you stayed behind in New York so you could have a romantic weekend with Rachel. How could you Will!" Emma yelled at him.
"I what?" Will said confused. "Where did you hear this from?" he asked curiously. I bet it was Dustin. I'm going to kill him when we get home, Will though. By now Rachel was sitting up and looking at him curiously.
"You're not denying it? It really is true then?" Emma asked with hurt filled in her voice.
"No Emma it's not. I only stayed behind because I couldn't leave Rachel by herself in New York City. Why would you think that I would have an affair?" Will asked. What did I get myself into? Will thought.
"I don't know. I'm sorry for accusing you Will. It's just that I heard Mercedes talking about it when they got off the airplane and I jumped to conclusion," Emma said.
"It's okay. Look I have to go but I'll see you on Monday okay?" Will said trying to end the conversation before he got himself into an even bigger mess.
"Alright. I hope Rachel is okay and not being too much of a hassle for you," Emma replied.
"It's going okay. Talk to you later Emma," Will said as he hung up his phone. He looked over to Rachel who still had a confused look on her face.
"What was that about?" she asked.
"Well apparently Emma overheard Mercedes saying that I stayed back in New York with you to have a romantic weekend," Will said.
"That is partially true," Rachel said while letting out a small laugh.
"It is but I can't tell Emma that. She would be heartbroken and we can't risk her telling anyone else," Will said.
"Good point. Well I'm going to try and take a nap again," Rachel said.
"Okay. I think I might also," Will said as he got comfortable again. As he finally got settled he found that he could not close his eyes. He wasn't tired anymore so instead he watched Rachel peacefully fall asleep on his chest again. As he looked at her, a smile grew on his face and he thought about how beautiful she looked when she was peacefully sleeping. He still felt incredibly guilty about everything but he thought that he probably always would and in the end he came to accept that if that was what brought them together then it would just be okay.