Chapter 1: In Essence, it Begins
Warning: (M) Graphic depictions of Violence, Mental Disorders, etc.
Rating: (T-M) Not for Kids.
Pairings: Sakura/Sasuke, vaguely.
Summary: [Inspired by Lie in Reverse by Rivera Moonlight.] Using a scroll he found during a mission, a power-hungry Twelve-Year-Old Sasuke utilizes it to bring his future self into the past to defeat Itachi. As promised, the scroll gives him what he wants... except it summons not one, but two versions of his future; his 17 and 32-year-old selves that, to his dismay, want the opposite. (Or, how Old Man Sasuke changes the plot by being an awkward dad, Teenage Sasuke coping with his horrifying trauma, and Kid Sasuke realizing that he's more thankful for his friends than he ever wanted to be.)
A/N: So, I wanted to write a time-travel story. Here it is. Give credits to the amazing MoonlitNightin for her wonderous inspiration that bestowed my dry-ass eyes. Her story "lie in reverse" is similar to this one, though with notable differences. Make sure to go read it! It's amazing.
Some ways I address Sasuke's:
Adult Sasuke = 32 Year Old
Teenage Sasuke/Missing-Nin Sasuke = 17 Year Old
Genin Sasuke/Child Sasuke = 12 Year Old
Those are just a few! Happy reading!
[. . .]
"Peanut."
[. . .]
Chapter 1
In Essence, it Begins
[. . .]
There is absolute silence when Shadow Hokage Uchiha Sasuke wakes from what he likely considers the most painful physical experience he has had in his life, second to the sensational equity of losing an arm a decade or so back after the tremendous battle between his best friend and his long-gone persistence to be alone.
The flaming prickles slither across his flesh in biting agonies that put a horrifying climax in his left eye similar to creeping lightning; right where his Rinnegan rests. He sits up with a suppressed gasp, his lungs desperately inflating with air through a rough inhale of his nose that sears the purple visionary shut with blood. His head swirls and his stomach pumps enough to warn his mouth of upcoming digested food, but much like every other pain scorching his insides, he represses it supremely until he can gather his wits—all in ten seconds.
His eye registers a green ceiling—a room? A room found only in his memories—in Konoha. Before... Before he had left. The thrown blue covers of an old bed, the charred balcony window, and the half-burned scrolls plastered on the beige walls are all the same, down from the coloring to the very smell.
Numb colds caress his limbs briefly just as he moves, and they flare into action when he realizes that this room shouldn't exist or make him feel physically there (not burned, not smelling of smoke and lavender either) and like a lightning strike, he chitters his heavy head to move with a terrifying snap toward the surroundings he feels eerily familiar chakra circulate.
(Fire dances at the edges of his sight but he pays little attention to such insignificance.)
While killing isn't so far off his game in his thirty-two-year-old mind after Naruto's restless Talk-No-Jutsu chastising him to learn of someone before action is entailed, it scintillates anyway for a fleeting moment because of both the pain that's slowly receding and because the last thing he remembers is fainting.
His first thought is that someone attempted to kill him. That's the quick logic he manifests because he has yet to compartmentalize just what the fuck bestows this heavy ache that feels like receding poison. Therefore, it's only fair that when he raises his arm, summoning three collective shurikens between his steady digits; they release in an inhumanly concise direction to the target's head—only for them to falter the second they hit an invisible barrier that he slowly registers with his opening Rinnegan.
A chakra barrier.
Around two faces that look extremely familiar.
Without his consent, his body freezes in absurdity—gauges the shock of a boy that bears his old Genin clothes and the incredulity subdued alertness of another with an attire he usually feels embarrassment toward within his guilt-ridden memories—and ponders.
Ponders in what feels like an hour, but in actuality is ten seconds; his eye bursts with chakra that creates a vibrant air that whisps their hair back, checking for a Genjutsu, and then leaves him unbelievably disconcerted when nothing happens.
What is this?
He uses another spurt of chakra to remove what he thinks is a Genjutsu.
They watch him, waiting for a fight, with one sweating visible bullets and the other making an effort to keep it together.
They still don't disappear.
Baffled, his blank face contorts to omnipotent suspicion and he stands tall, immediately peering directly into the eyes of the poised boys he dares not entertain in the fathomless void he calls his deluded mind.
His body settles easily, regained in strength, thus causing erratic infusion of (it couldn't be) his chakra within them.
Before he can demand answers, the older (him? Is that him, truly?) boy jumps back and sneers but with repressed admiration (bewilderment) and his Genin self (because what the fuck, there is no other way to fucking explain it) breaks the killing intent with his voice.
"I-I'm you," He stutters out, failing to hold back the awe in his eyes and the shake in his hands as he raises a measly kunai in defense.
What.
He pauses, perplexed at what's just said as if he can't see it for himself.
Impossible, he almost spits, but he holds himself from doing so. This wouldn't be the first time he wound up in precarious situations.
At his silence, his Genin clone composes his face with determination and continues talking, although still breathless with conflicted fear. "I summoned you through... through a scroll," He swallows, contracting his eyes into a weak perseverance of power, "A time-jutsu scroll." His voice becomes like steel.
Sasuke's already narrowed eyes narrow further.
"It's true," Interjects his teenage apparition when he doesn't easily fall for whatever trick this is. The (fake?) body of his Genin illusion looks to the left, wide-eyed.
Sasuke snaps his head over in the same direction, still emitting his sinister killing intent. He finds the teen posed with his sword at a subtle angle in his direction, struggling to keep his composure but nevertheless doing so. "I came here an hour before you," He continues, mouth set in a grim line. "I didn't believe it at first." He shoots a growing glare at the Genin not-so-likely imaginary version of himself, "But I've already tried to dispel any Genjutsu. There is none." He looks like he wants to say more, but his lips simmer shut when Sasuke moves intimidatingly in acknowledgment.
"Time travel?" He mumbles, and he really does take a second to think: what the fuck.
It's not impossible. He's been in the past with Boruto before.
But this? Multiple versions of him?
This sounds like a mess of interdimensional timeless nonsense.
Sasuke straightens, quietly calculating. A sense of wrongness prevails through the air, and his gut swirls in expectation, waiting for the farce to break as his eye relentlessly continues to break apart something that isn't there. The iron building up behind it shrivels away from the influences he takes to get rid of a mockery Genjutsu.
Nothing happens.
"Explain," He then demands lowly, stepping back to give them a safe sense of distance. As a precautionary measure as well, just in case this entire thing is a ridiculous attempt to catch him off-guard with a knife to the gut. Not that they could, presuming that the fallacies of the past versions of himself are meant to keep the same skill level.
The teenager turns to look at his Genin self expectantly, who grips his kunai tight in a strangling grip. "My... My team came back from the mission in waves a few days ago. While I-I was there—" He seems to hate himself at that moment for the sputter, and then Sasuke realizes he's still releasing killing intent. He turns it off, watches the visible relief of the two, and waits for the Genin to proceed.
He does so, less afraid. "I saw a scroll with the Uchiha Clan Emblem in a shop. I bought it, taking the chance that it was possibly authentic, and waited until I got to my apartment before testing it."
Sasuke watches the boy with carefully guarded eyes as he brings out the tiny wad of rolled paper from his pocket. "Before I left, I was told the scroll held ancient secrets. I didn't believe it," His mouth moves to the side in slight frustration when he notices that Sasuke has yet to change his scary facial expression, "But the more I thought about it, the more I wanted to know. I decided to try it out, half expecting it wouldn't work..."
He trails off, looking at his Teenage self leaning on the wall with crossed arms and an angry countenance that swears revenge against the child. "But it did," He harshly spews.
"Without any conception of the effects the time trajectory might've caused," Sasuke includes just as severely, grabbing both of their attention.
The Genin looks away. His features harden. "I wanted power."
To this, Sasuke is no fool.
"And..." He clenches a fist and brandishes it close to his chest, raising it from the emotion that sparks a litter of reminders for Sasuke.
Reminders that he doesn't want to take any part.
"I wanted you to give it to me. To... To train me," He tries, anxious when Sasuke angles his body slightly away, thus confounding the adult and creating a knowing look from the teenager. "Maybe he won't help me but you—" His Sharingan manifests with rage, pinpointing him with desperate loathing that makes Sasuke frown further at the abrupt change, "I summoned you with the intention to help me kill that... that man—"
The Teenager shuffles, "Do you really think he'll do it?" He sneers, and the kid glares back at him. "If he's me, if he's the future me, us, I don't care—if he is, he won't." He looks sure when he says this, and even goes to look at the adult, challenging.
"Are you?"
It's a damn question that Sasuke can see the effective doubt littered between sore hope. He doesn't need to answer to see the bitter victory in the hormonal youth's eye a second later.
"No," His twelve-year-old self refutes, temperamental, "I used my chakra to—"
"I don't care. Neither does he. He won't train you," The teenager nods his head at the only adult in the room. "And now we're both pulled from our time for no fucking reason. You weren't thinking. You were foolish—"
"Quiet," Sasuke immediately declares, and the room enters a haunting silence. The Teenager glares at him and the kid looks over, unable to hide the fervor coiling around his expressive face. But they silence.
Seconds pass while Sasuke takes the time to stew about this unexpected situation. This time, there is no turtle involved, nor a Boruto creating a faulty seal that could've convoluted this risky mess. He was on his way to call for Sarada when he felt weak, a burn behind his eyes, and passed out. Before blacking out he hadn't seen anyone but Sarada's alarmed expression coming out of the forest bushes.
Now he's here, hearing his twelve-year-old memory declare that he was summoned to kill a brother he longs to reunite with—along with a face that carries the peak of his regrets.
He doesn't want to believe he's here, surrounded by two important years of his miserable existence.
But the chakra he senses and takes a careful look at with his Rinnegan does not lie.
It doesn't help that hearing himself berate the foolishness of a child anchors a bitter melancholy inside him that he shouldn't be feeling, especially considering that this could all be some top-notch fake world trying to trick him. Though there is no one, besides probably Sakura and Naruto, that could put him in a Genjutsu this elaborate. He would have seen it by now.
Sasuke eases his expression into a vexing understanding that seems to confuse the two of them (because, surely, a calm Sasuke is a scary one). Or, one. The other looks like he hadn't expected him to look less threatening after that declaration. The twelve-year-old appears a little more hopeful and internally the adult winces.
"I can't do that," He says this, assuming that his teenage self hinted at the denial of a demise that he can't quite forget about before he roused.
If he relents that this is indeed time travel and bases his befuddling theory that the missing-nin of his past has already killed off his brother (the eyes are a dead giveaway) and learned the truth, then he has slightly less to worry about when it comes to angry, traumatized youths fucking up the timeline. It explains why the Teenager looked so triumphant when he initially became quiet.
What has him sad, nostalgic, and aggravated all in one is his past genin self. (Not taking in the fact that he's also aggrieved more so from the seventeen-year-old.)
The pestering side of him strains when he scrutinizes the child—him, because if he's somehow gone through these types of lengths to achieve this... A dangerous, random seal with disastrous potential...
Seeing this, from a different perspective now that he has had years to heal the bits and pieces torn from his heart, truly allows him to notice what Naruto might've seen. Being called by his past self just by the chance that he used a scroll is uncharacteristically something he might've done, but the problem lies in the fact that he does not remember any of this. Regardless, it's a harsh reminder.
Because he understands.
He's lived this. Not this moment, but his life.
And maybe years ago he might've been heartless to that fault—a fault that he clearly sees within his teenage past right in front of him, because in truth he's made too many mistakes, hated himself (and to some degree still does, because Sarada and Sakura deserved better than his absence) but he's grown to heal. He doesn't feel as angry as he used to.
But this 12-year-old version of him? The one that's yet to have had a proper hand give him help? A child?
He doesn't have his years of atonement. He doesn't have anyone, hasn't allowed anyone in to do so, and therefore has no concept of what lies beneath so much pain.
He's a child that's just begun the path he long regrets.
He's not angry at the request the child beseeched from him. Upset, more like, because this is a mockery of what he had been.
He knows now, after a decade and a half, that he was a hurt kid with nothing else to live for besides the death of a brother who couldn't have been more than 13 years old when crimson became the floors of memories.
He's here, in the past, facing the start and the climax of the festering hatred he's let go of... A hatred his brother formed—had broken him in doing so, leaving him resentful, bitter, and yet accepting all in one.
A brother he killed. And now, he faces an old photograph of a time before he had dealt the final blow to his heart—
His soul lurches at a sudden realization.
Itachi is alive.
Hopelessness hollows into the child when the man simply stares at him with no further projection. "What... Why!?" He hisses, wide-eyed and helpless, and steps forward with twisted fists. He acts like this isn't the first time he's been denied, and in a sense, it isn't. Sasuke is inclined to believe that his teenage self refused the offer, and likely hurt the boy because he looks to be on the verge of setting him on fire. "You know what he did! How... You would want revenge! You're me!"
It's a cry for help that he's cruel for refusing.
Sasuke's expression harshens. "Hand me the scroll," He says instead of giving the upcoming mental breakdown a response, unmoving and ignoring the snort from the teenager a few steps away. (He cannot entertain his objections. He knows what he'll reveal if he does.)
Itachi is alive.
He can...
He falters, hearing his younger self desperately reverse what cannot be undone.
Would it be wise? Would he want to change history?
Every part of him screams yes. His heart, especially does so, renewed with profound sadness that leaves him stunningly breathless because—Kami, his brother is alive.
He can reverse every wrong he has done. (He can save his younger self from all the pain that came after his delusion.) There's a chance now, that he can live. (Where he won't be alone, if only.)
But would he dare so? Would he dare change the flow of time more than what it is doing now, just for Itachi? Probably not. Sasuke isn't stupid. He's not that desperate Teenager anymore that'll do anything he can to see his brother one last time. He's already accepted he's gone even though he yearns for another moment.
But what of this young version of him? He can change that. He can give himself a resentful, but healing ending instead of the cards he'd been dealt with.
It's better if he tells his younger self the truth if he decides to. Better to rip the bandage off than prolong the inevitable.
Unexplainably, the two young Sasukes watch his expression morph into exhaustion.
He has to, he decides resolutely. His Itachi is already dead. But in this timeline, he is not.
(He feels like a Hypocrite. Boruto had wanted the same. He had denied it.)
"Please give me the scroll," Sasuke speaks in a dull tone, and they blink at him incredulously, "Summoning the both of us here was a great risk that can destroy this reality and likely multiple others. I need to see what you did and check if there's any lasting damage. Messing with time is a perilous fault I'd rather not cease to exist from." His ending comment is bland.
In truth, he's not sure the same rule applies this time around. Again, there is no stupid time turtle or jumping Ōtsutsuki on his trail.
The kid pales slightly and reluctantly hands him the tube after several minutes of suspicious staring.
The Teenager moves closer, curious. "...Can you reverse it?" There's yearning in his voice but there's also a hint of something else. Something more sinister.
Sasukes eyes him, knowing exactly what's going on in his brain. "Probably," He admits, and the two versions of him look impressed. "I've traveled through time before, though it was under different circumstances." He holds it from the edge and flicks the object, unraveling it. "I don't recall ever buying this."
"Really..." The teenager murmurs as his eyes drift to his left side. A startlingly empty left side.
The kid isn't so quiet about it. "Your arm..."
Sasuke ignores that and reads the instructions in the fine print.
It details the pedagogy on how to trigger it; a ring made of charcoal that characterizes the imprint of the Rinnegan, candles serving as the tomoe, and enough chakra to cover the lines in an invigorating blue conduit. A cross of blood within the center is also recommended for more power...
Sasuke lowers the scroll and turns around, looking back to where he woke up. A circle of fire inflames in a messy spectacle, threatening to catch the light on the ashen wall because of its large size. There, in the middle where the candles are knocked over, sits a smudge of blood. Miniscule, but enough.
He looks at the scroll again, turning on his Sharingan and memorizing all of it; including the strange exposition at the end.
Jikkan Rewritten
Multiple Eyes Of All, Bounden Truth
In Essence, it Begins
and starts the Endings of Yogen
A Ghost of Mine.
His eyebrows furrow.
Whoever created this jutsu must've done so to either warn them of a future that backfired—if the old splatters of blood on the edges are any indication—or an attempt to go back in time to change a period of events without repercussions. It speaks of prophecy and eyes. This screams Uchiha Issues.
The weight of the chittering scroll doesn't feel distinctly Uchiha, however—if anything, it carries Hyuuga and Uzumaki chakra. There are three lines on the outside cover of the scroll; two with distinct smear marks that end with the stench of death, and one that's empty. It seems to have only needed Uchiha...
His Sharigan expands and he considers burning it, but ultimately decides on putting it away in the pocket of his pants. As angry as he is that he suspects a stupid Ōtsutsuki is behind this issue yet again, he can't remove the evidence. There's an obvious much that he's not seeing.
The Genin looks against him taking what he originally owned but is also too blanched by what Sasuke warned him about to object to it.
He ignores the elevated stink eye from both occupants. "It's a miracle you didn't die." His voice is placid.
To the boy, it sounds rugged and cold.
Sasuke continues as his Sharingan disappears. "The scroll is heavy with chakra. I assume two others before you attempted to use it. They were killed."
The boy momentarily appears stricken.
Sasuke, in that second, remembers why Kakashi kept asking him if he was okay in his own shitty sense while he was a boy. He makes it too obvious when he feels emotions of extreme intent, and he wonders how he ever managed to get where he is now with that erratic weakness. Again, however, he can't and won't blame the kid. It's not as if anyone was around to train him properly.
It's a lamentable disclosure that has him wondering if Naruto chased after him because he saw enough of what he desperately kept hidden.
"And you know this how?" The teenager interjects, curious. His gears work to match his pace, and Sasuke is half-surprised that the teen doesn't seem overly suspicious of him. I'm him, he reminds himself. Still an incredulous concept, but Sasuke isn't known for his obedience, so he doesn't know what's making the juvenile so complacent.
He finds he does not care. "The scroll sucked in all their chakra," He theorizes, "There are two foreign signatures that make it heavy. Hyuuga and Uzumaki. They both hold the same amount as a regular Jonin's worth. The different blood confirms its earlier use."
The genin sweatdrops but his expression hardens. "Then why wasn't I killed?" He demands rather weakly, swallowing and hoping to stop the annoying way Sasuke keeps looking at him.
"Your reserves are low," Sasuke acquiesces, "And I'm missing a small portion of my chakra. There's a chance the scroll took bits from all of us thus preventing you from meeting an early demise."
The teenager agrees, flexing his hand. "I'm missing a decent amount." His glare is back on the nervous child.
Sasuke thinks back to the cryptic words, questioning if the ancient Uchiha phrasing similar to the stone is hinting at it. In Essence, it Begins, he recites mentally, affirming his short-lived theory. It seems to have meant Chakra, or maybe the blood his younger self used. Either way, he can clue back and use that to see if there's a chance to reverse it. He's not that well-off with seals. That's more Naruto's job.
If portal jumping won't work, he'll need to look for Jiraiya.
He feels himself grow tired the more he realizes just how dire his predicament is.
"Are you able to send us back?" The teenager asks again blandly, stopping him from creating a portal to check things out.
Sasuke pays no heed to that. "I don't know," He says candidly. "The scroll contains a recitation that hints at a way back, but it's cryptic. It mentions Jikkan."
"Our fortune?" The teen grumbles. "What fortune. We're stuck here doing nothing."
Genin Sasuke doesn't speak up, but he can relate to how both of them refused.
Curious, Sasuke studies the teenager's impassiveness. "You've yet to leave," He tells him boldly. He knows by now that this version of him knows that Itachi is alive. Sasuke had been desperate to have another second with his brother; he would've left to go find him by now. So what keeps him around?
The teen stiffens. "That's because we're bound by a Chakra string," He expresses vehemently. "I would've been long gone by now. I'm wasting time by being here. There are more important things to do rather than babysit." His eyes implore him meaningly.
The child glares hatefully at his older self. There's a hint of hurt in his gaze.
Sasuke frowns. "Bound?" He mumbles, and now that he mentions it, he can feel something wrapped around his heart. He thought it had just been the discomfort at seeing relics of his past, but it does seem uncompromising...
Multiple Eyes of All, Bounden Truth
He curses internally. Of all fucking things... Bound in Truth, he surmises, likely means that they're together because everything isn't out in the open yet. To release it, they need to let the truth of something come to light. Maybe he's wrong and it means something else, but that's the sole rationale he can come up with for now.
The only thing that comes to Sasuke's mind is Itachi's undoing. But what if it's something else? It mentions their fortune and their eyes; likely the Sharignan. They might all need to see something before they can be set free. Or they might need to unlock the Mangekyo...
It's probably a way to go back, seeing that he can't even use a portal to see if he can overwrite the jutsu himself now with that information circling about.
The teen crosses his arms and doesn't say anything else, waiting to see what the adult has to say to him. He imagines it's nothing good.
Sasuke narrows his eyes and turns full-body to the blank-faced missing-nin. "From what period do you come from?"
He sees his jaw clench and the grip of his chokuto's handle tighten. "I assume you would know," He replies bitterly.
"No," Sasuke admits. "I've worn one attire for the duration of some of the most life-threatening moments in my life," He explains, eyeing his clothes and the ridiculous purple rope, "I imagine you already know the truth."
The teen's face contorts with wrath and drops the instant it arrives. "Yes." It's spoken through gritted teeth.
"Good," Sasuke then takes a moment, thinking. He doesn't know for sure if the teen already attempted to kill the man behind the Uchiha Oppression. "And Danzo?"
He sees his Sharingan manifest. Minutes tick by, and Sasuke watches with boredom as the teenager openly sneers at him. "...He's dead." There's a challenge in his eyes.
Behind the teen, the child version of him looks between them in confusion.
"I see," Sasuke grows quiet, monitoring the bubbling anger. He sees it, lives and has lived in it, and can't help himself from sighing at the open display of hatred. He understands this too. He still despises Danzo for the preposterous condemnation of the Uchiha. He just wishes his past self didn't look so deep into all the regrets he'll eventually come to know. "Good," He expresses neutrally and turns away before he can see the teenager dampen in suspicion, surprise, and loss.
"You."
The Genin, who has been waiting with a traitorous, confounded look, is ready to demand answers, and Sasuke doesn't blame him. "What?" He spits.
"You mentioned you just came back from The Waves Mission?"
The boy nods.
Sasuke squints at him. "What happened?"
For a moment, the two younger versions of him look confused. "Don't you know?" The kid asks. The Teen watches him closely.
"Enlighten me," He brushes off.
The child tells him without much thought: They escort a man named Tazuna, encounter Momochi Zabuza, witness the fight between his sensei and the missing-nin which later renders the Hatake unconscious, take themselves to The Land of Waves, recuperate for a week while they watch Tazuna build his bridge, and then fight Zabuza once more.
"...Zabuza dies next to the Kiri Assassin," The Genin finishes, avoiding Sasuke's eyes. His story is vague, but enough.
"There's no change," Sasuke tells him. "The only difference was Team 7 stopping for a shopping spree on their way back to Konoha." Somehow, he wouldn't put it past Kakashi to do something like that.
"Yeah," The boy mumbles.
Sasuke regards the moody teenager again, "Do these events correlate with your own?"
The Teen nods. "I didn't buy a scroll," He adds.
Interesting.
Engaging with the youngest in the room, he forms a plan. "Do you know where the store is?" Sasuke questions the boy, and the boy rubs his elbow, looking unsure.
"Yes," He answers.
"Good. We're leaving." He brushes past them and toward the door.
"What?"
"Huh?"
"We're leaving," He repeats, angling his head to look at them over his shoulder.
"That shop doesn't belong in this time."