Wow. This is really long guys, so be prepared. I was on a roll writing this, because I thought of the idea at like, 11pm last night as I was getting into my pyjamas. I realised that everything's been going really well in the story, and pretty uneventfully, so I- WAIT! I'm not supposed to tell you that! Let's just say that things don't go so according to plan in our latest chapter…

BEGIN!

x Rachel

I can't write.

It's the night after the night of the dance, and I'm still not over it. I'm such an idiot, I'm such a moron, and I'll never forgive myself for what I did. I wasn't even drunk, so I can't use that as an excuse. What happened to me?

The night started out so well. We had arranged to meet up at Lovino's grandfather's restaurant in town, an Italian place, obviously. I got there and everyone was already there, and Francis waved at me through the window. I was wearing a dress that Feliks had picked out for me, soft, floaty purple material with a black ribbon round my waist, and a purple 60s hairband in my messy silver hair. I'd taken out the contacts for the occasion, and felt a lot more content with my red eyes again.

"Gil!" Antonio beamed, pulling me into a hug with Francis.

I must say, they both looked fantastic. Antonio was wearing a white shirt, black waistcoat and black jeans, with an orange tie and a badass black and orange Michael Jackson hat. Francis was wearing a blue long-sleeved shirt, deep navy jeans and a black tie. I could see both their dates at the table. Lovino (who wasn't wearing a dress, thank goodness) was sipping at a glass of wine, and smiled and saluted when he saw me, and Sophie looked very pretty, in a pale pink dress with her long hair covering one of her eyes. And then I spotted him; Roderich.

He was grinning broadly, wearing a black suit with a plum coloured shirt and a black tie. His brown hair was combed back, that one odd little strand still sticking up, and I ran forwards and collapsed in his outstretched arms. I breathed in deeply, and found that he smelt awesome, of the outdoors and fresh air, combined with a smell of freshly baked pastry. I looked up and his happy, violet eyes and slipped my hand into his.

"You look beautiful," he smiled.

"You look awesome," I grinned, and he laughed.

All six of us walked out of the restaurant and got into the car. Roderich drove, I sat in the passenger seat, and the other four crammed into the back. I looked back at them. Antonio had his arm around Lovi, and was whispering to him. Lovi grinned, and smacked him in the face, but Antonio just laughed and hugged him tighter. Sophie was chatting to Francis, and laughing happily at his jokes, leaning against him. I smirked at my two friends, and leaned my head on Roderich's shoulder. He didn't take his eyes off the road, but he smiled even so.

We arrived at the dance just in time to see everyone arrive as well, and I was on cloud 9. I loved seeing people I knew out of school, seeing what they wore, what they acted like, and the most important thing of all; who they went with.

I spotted Feliks and Toris immediately. They were hard to miss; Feliks, who was an expert cross-dresser if ever you saw one, was wearing a pink puffy dress that just reached his knees. He managed to pull it off perfectly, with a pink ribbon in his blonde hair to match. Toris was wearing jeans and a cream shirt, and was giggling at his boyfriend as he talked. I didn't care what anyone said; even though they were both guys, and one was severely gender confused, they were made for each other.

"Guys!" grinned Feliks, throwing his free arm around me. "So, Gil, like, was I right, or right?"

Oh right, the bet. We had been told that none of the guys were allowed to wear dresses earlier that week. I told Feliks I would pay him a fiver if he could pretend that he was a girl and get through security at the door without being told off for cross-dressing. I guess he did. Wow. Grumbling, I handed him the money.

Just then, I was attacked by a huge, loud-mouthed American.

"Alfred!" I yelled, losing my balance and falling to the floor, Alfred landing on top of me.

"Oops!" he grinned, scrambling on to his feet and pulling me up. "It's just… I'm so excited!"

"Why?" I asked, curious.

"Because I finally got the date I wanted," he smiled shyly.

"Who?" I asked, completely befuddled.

Alfred was interrupted as a beaming Brit appeared next to him, and slipped his hand into Alfred's, going a little pink, but still smiling happily. My mouth fell open.

"Wait… you guys are together?" I asked, amazed. So that was where Francis had been all week…

"Yup," smiled Alfred, hugging Arthur closer to him, and I clapped my hands.

"Congrats! Aw, that's awesome!"

We all walked into the ballroom together, and I spotted many familiar faces. Ludwig waved at me from his table, sitting right next to Feli and looking the happiest I'd ever seen him. Feli was beaming too, ecstatic about showing off my brother. Berwald and Tino showed up and Berwald danced particularly well when 'Waterloo' was played, smiling more than usual as he twirled Tino around. I even came across Yao and Ivan kissing over by the stairs, and spotted them together half an hour afterwards, Yao smiling at everyone. She looked gorgeous in her red traditional Chinese dress, and Ivan couldn't let her go within three metres of any other guy.

The night started to fall apart at about half eleven. Francis and Sophie had split up ages ago, and Francis was flirting with every girl in the room. We were approached by the Poison trio just as I sat down from the last waltz, and Roderich went off to get drinks.

"So, Francis," said Sasha, smiling. "I heard you and Sophie broke up earlier, is that right?"

Francis scowled, but nodded.

"God, Frenchy, you can't even keep Sophie? She was crazy about you! I swear, you must be the world's worst kisser or something, because it seems you can't even get close enough to a girl to kiss her without being dumped."

"He is not!" I yelled, standing up straight, Francis standing beside me.

"Oh yeah? Would you kiss him?"

I should have known it at the time. Sasha had just been dumped by Llewellyn, and she was mad. She wanted someone to lash out at, and I just happened to be her mortal enemy, with world's worst temper and a tendency to act and then think. At the time though, I just felt mad. I fell silent, knowing the true answer: No.

"See?" she laughed scornfully. "Not even your best friend would kiss you Francis. You're a failure."

I don't know why I did it. I wasn't thinking straight, all I wanted to do was wipe the stupid self-satisfied grin off her face, and I completely forgot everything. I reached forward, grabbed Francis by the tie, and pulled his face towards mine, pressing my lips against his.

I completely forgot where I was at that moment, completely forgot what I was doing, or the fact that everyone was probably looking. I had acted on impulse. Francis' lips tasted odd… not bad, but a bit like how kissing your own brother must feel like. He was too familiar, he kissed like nothing compared to Roderich.

Roderich.

What was I thinking? What was I doing? Suddenly, the room came flooding back and I realised what I was doing; I was kissing my best friend in a ballroom, while my boyfriend was there. I immediately pushed Francis away and my eyes flickered over the hushed room before I spotted him. Roderich was standing a few feet away, holding two glasses of punch. His face unreadable, he put the glasses down and headed for the door. And I realised; he hadn't heard what Sasha had said. All he'd seen was me… kissing Francis.

"Roderich!" I cried, fighting my way through the crowd to get to him. He heard me, but didn't look back. No, this wasn't happening, this wasn't happening.

I caught up with him just outside the hall as he was calling up a cab.

"No, Roderich, please, you've got to listen to me-,"

"Listen to vat?" he yelled, scaring me. He spun round to look at me, and I could see he was close to tears. "That you lied to me? I asked you! Before ve started going out, didn't I ask you if you vere seeing Francis! And you said no!" He laughed bitterly. "I should have known. Antonio's your friend too, and he's a guy, but you don't hang out vith him as much as Francis."

I was almost crying now, but my pride refused to let me cry in front of him. "No, Roderich, it's not like that-,"

"It is," he said, just as the cab pulled up. He opened the door, and then looked back at me, staring at me with deep, angry, violet eyes. "I'm sorry I wasted your time, Gil." His words hit me hard, sharp and stinging as the cab drove away and I collapsed onto the marble steps, sobbing uncontrollably.

What had I done? Why? What the bloody hell was I even thinking? Kissing Francis? What was that even about? I rocked forward and backwards, my face in my hands, crying quietly and whispering "Roderich" over and over again until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I raised my head to see a concerned-looking Antonio, an equally sympathetic Lovino behind him. They sat down on either side of me, Tonio with his arm around me and Lovi stroking my hair. I cried harder; I didn't deserve friends like these.

"I hate myself, Tonio," I sniffled, and the Spaniard hugged me tighter.

"Gil? Vat's wrong?"

I didn't even look over my shoulder, but that was OK. West kneeled down in front of me, Feli next to him, and I tried to cover my face. I didn't want bruder to see me crying. Feli smiled, sighed, and reached out to stroke my cheek, wiping away my tears.

"Come on, Gil, what's wrong? You can tell us, ve?" he said softly.

"It's Roderich, isn't it?" asked West, and I nodded slightly. "Vere is he? Vat did he do? I swear Gil, if he did anything to you-,"

"No," I interrupted him. "It was my fault. I- I don't want to talk about it. He had every right to leave. Ich bin so dumm, Bruder! Ich liebe ihn!" I yelled the last words, words that only West understood.

"Es wird in Ordnung, Schwester," he whispered. "Trust me, ja?"

I nodded quietly, and Ludwig took my hand and pulled me up. I went inside, and found Francis. I had to apologise, I knew. Francis was crying too, when I told him what happened.

"Gil, I'm so sorry. It was my fault, I'm sorry," he said, hugging me, and I hugged him back, sniffling. "It wasn't your fault, Francis, it was mine. I hate myself," I mumbled into his chest as Antonio rubbed my back. Lovino had gone off, seeing that we needed a bit of time on our own, and Feli (who's actually very good at reading the atmosphere) had pulled Ludwig away to dance. I must have looked awful, sobbing into Francis' chest as Antonio spoke comfortingly in my ear, about how I'd get over it soon. I'm sure I ruined the dance for Francis and Tonio.

I'm at home now. West drove us all home earlier than expected. Had it been the normal me, I would have laughed and said "See? You can't even party without the awesome me!", but instead I sat in Francis' arms, quiet, until we reached home. Francis had left his car at my house, and drove back home once we'd got back.

West and I walked up the stairs in silence, until I broke it.

"West, I'm so sorry," I mumbled, and he smiled.

"It's okay, Gil. You made a mistake, like everyone does sometimes, and soon enough you'll put it right. Do you still love him?" I nodded, biting down on my lip. "Vell then, you'll sort it out. You just need determination, that's all. And Feli and I will always be here for you, okay?"

I nodded. I could still only think of Roderich.

It's only been a day without him, and I still feel empty. I didn't wake up this morning to a phone call from Roderich, asking me if I was okay and then telling me he loved me. I didn't go out for lunch today to that little Chinese takeout down the road, because I only like it when Roderich's there to mispronounce the names of the food, so I have to correct him, laughing. And I didn't come home today with Roderich by my side, and kiss him goodbye when we got to the door. I just sat in my room all day.

How can things go from sweet to sour so quickly?

Aww, poor Gil. You guys had better review, because I really loved this couple and I'm totally depressed now that they're split up. Well, at least I didn't have to split up Ludwig and Feli; that would have broken my heart. And I didn't get to add in Ireland here, but I promise she'll come up later.

Review!